Am I being controlling?

Am I controlling for having my bf block his girl best friend after texting sexual stuff to her for the past 3 months behind my back??? He said it was all just a fantasy and that nothing happened between them but she says I’m controlling him by having him block her if he wanted us to work stuff out…

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Am I being controlling?

You aren’t being controlling. He is not being honest. No one should have a best friend they text or talk to sexually. That’s a friend with benefits.

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I agree. Dump him. Fantasy? Or reality.

leave the whole relationship

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No you’re not controlling him. And that girl should be asking herself if she would be okay with that happening to her… I doubt it. If he puts up a stink about it, dump him

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Stop it… get rid of him

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No if he wanted you anyway he wouldn’t get mad leave him.

You shouldn’t have to be in a relationship where you have to make someone block someone else. You have your own answer. Move on

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Absolutely not!!!
She is manipulating him by saying that…
He should cut her off completely if they have crossed that line … and he wants to stay with u…

I would have asked him to make a choice, instead of making him…

If he wants ur relationship to work… then having that in ur lives will not help the relationship at all… so no he should cut all ties… the lines been crossed

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If he’s texting sexual stuff to another woman that is cheating - fantasy or not. He shouldn’t be speaking sexually with anyone but you.
If he’s not invested in you, you need to go. No point in trying to “control” him, even though you’re completely justified in your actions, it’s not worth your time. Know your worth!

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Girllllllllll. No. Leave him. Oh just fantasy??? They could make it real cause id be moving on.

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You shouldnt have to ask him to block her, if he was really sorry about what he did he would block her and not talk to her again, I would get rid his got no respect for you xx

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Giiiirl give that boy to the streets & find better :crossed_fingers:t3:

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Girl that relationship over

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honestly id dump him for that cause if he is having fantasys of her then hes not with you anymore

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Honey when you wake up and find out he hasn’t stopped talking to her then what?

You don’t have to physically have sex with someone for it to be considered cheating. I’d tell her, “oh, you can have him then and fulfill those fantasies in real life. He’s not my man now, he’s yours.” Then kick him the fuck out, he can go live with his bestie. :woman_shrugging:

Girl best friend? Do you mean ex? Id be out in a flash, that’s cheating

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Um, HE is the instigator sending stuff to her, not the other way around. She is not the problem, HE is. Sorry you thought you had a monogamous boyfriend instead of a jerk.

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Run!! Even if he says he will block her he will go back eventually.

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Thats his whole other bitch :rofl: she dont wanna be blocked so now youre the bad one. Lmao. Leave girl.

Lol I would just leave at that point. He will forever blame you for that. And men hold resentment for being MADE to delete/block other females. So it’s not worth the headache. Once you catch somebody putting themselves in a position to lose you, you know they don’t truly love you. Walk away. Know your worth, girlie. YOU are the catch. :heartpulse:

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Uhm why control anyone :thinking:
If you have to catch him doing shady sh*t. Then sis he’s not the man for you!

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Your not being controlling. YOUR PLACING BOUNDARIES. if he can’t deal, he ain’t one to deal with.

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Make him block you and go on with yo life…

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Gross. Leave. He won’t change

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You spelled ex wrong

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He cheated on you! Let’s set this straight. He is gaslighting you. You have every right to set boundaries. The real question is why is he not trying to make it up to you instead of trying to make you feel bad about it. He should be the one saying I will never talk to her again and work really hard for a long time to gain your trust back.

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He’s gaslighting you saying it’s just a fantasy. His best friend is also gaslighting ( if she really said it) you by saying you’re controlling. It puts you at a tight spot. If you say anything against it, you’re too controlling and distrustful of both of their intentions. If you just let them continue on this path, you might just let them find a way for them to explore this “fantasy” but with your knowledge or you just might choose to ignore all the red flags. Tell him you’re going to text your male friends or coworkers some sexual stuff too but it’s just a “fantasy” and see how he reacts.

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You shouldn’t have to make him do anything. If he’s willing to do that guukt free he isn’t yours, hun. They’re both snakes.

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Just a fantasy? Sounds like more than a best friend. Maybe he and his bestie should go fulfill their fantasy. I’d have to let him go.

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Controlling? If he doesn’t like it he knows where the door is!
You can’t just get past knowing someone has had sexual discussions behind your back. Trust me, that shit sticks with you. And it’s not ok

Dont even waste time with him.

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Nah girl…leave him. Been there done that. “she’s just a friend” “Shes just my best friend like a sister” Months later he’s sleeping with her. So I would move on. He doesn’t respect you and never will. You will find someone who sees you as their one and only.

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Leave his cheating ass.

Girl you’re asking the wrong question. He should not have to block her but guess what else? You should not be with somebody who puts you in that position of having to ask them to block somebody that would ruin the relationship. Deal breaker shit js…block his ass is my advice.

Tell him he can go make his fantasy a reality by kicking his ass OUT. You’re worth more than that, sis.

Uhh why is this even a question?

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Leave them to it… They deserve each other… X

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He should be fantasizing about you. Leave before your heart gets hurt. He just isn’t ready.

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If he don’t want to block her then why fight about it just leave

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:joy: boundary/respect issues. They both need to go

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Throw the whole man away

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Girl block him and move on

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Nope. It’s not controlling it’s setting healthy boundaries

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Nope girl fuck that. If you’re not comfortable with it then he should block her w no problem. And if he doesn’t want to then he’s the problem.

Controlling? No. Dumb for staying with him? Yes.

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So what you are saying is, he pretty much cheated on you.

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you have to be kidding me. I’d have been gone, I can’t believe this is even a question.

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leave him not worth it he’ll just find a new girl to do that with

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Well ur trying to force him to choose u. He needs to be the one to decide to be faithful. U can only babysit his ass for so long. It’s not worth the stress and mental shit and self esteem issues. Let them fukn have each other. N move on to someone who knows ur worth. This dude already lost all respect for u when he was messaging that bitch. Pretty much if u continue this relationship he’ll just take u for granted cuz he knows ull play his fukn games.

Yea super controlling lol
If you need to have him block her so she won’t be doing things behind your back she’s not for you she’s for the streets
Get yourself someone you can trust and fantasizes about you :heart:

Why are you still with him ?

F**k em both, she’s the best friend so clearly she knows about you and neither of them cared.men have this idea that we are stuck with them just because we have a baby with them.

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You don’t get to control what any other human does. YOU can leave. YOU can quit the relationship. But you DONT get to set rules for a grown ass man.

That’s not a girl bestie. That’s a side piece baby girl… throw em both away.

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Are you trolling the page right now? :joy:

Why are you even asking, leave dont be one of those naive girls hes making you look like an idiot and and hes cheating. Let him someone elses problem.

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Blocking her won’t stop the behavior

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Umm I’d be kicking him.to the curb

Um, you deserve better. How dare she even say anything to you after disrespecting you. Someone will treat you how you want to be. Don’t waste your time. They are not going to stop.

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Thats not best friends. That cheating. Point. Blank. Period.

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That’s absolutely a dealbreaker. If he thinks it’s okay to be doing this then get away from him. There’s a big difference between being controlling and expecting respect.

She says???
Lmaoooo
Fuck her
Block him…
Fantasy ass BS
Now shes intrigued sounds like.

You don’t have him block a girl he was sexting. You get a man who doesn’t do that!

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:woman_facepalming:t3: he’s probably out boning his girl best friend…

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Ummm… Apparently, he would really like if they finally became more than “best friends.” So, you let them have each other—and you move on to someone that has a little more integrity and boundaries, and way less bullsh!t coming out his mouth.:v:t3:

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My bf and I were dating 3 mos, his “best friend” randomly txt him one day saying I love u and this is my temp number, we talked/argued, I told him I was done, he immediately blocked her because he didn’t wanna lose me, we’ve been together for a yr and almost a month now. If he cares he’ll do whatever to keep u. If he dnt. His loss. Someone else will cherish u baby girl.

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It’s only gonna get worse. You should leave him now. Save yourself months or years of heartbreak and disappointment. I assure you it will not be worth it

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If you have to ask your SO to block someone then y’all shouldn’t be together - he’s willing to lose u based off the sexual talk - & u don’t trust him - if u did u wouldn’t have been in his phone to see the messages - Best friends are platonic sex doesn’t even cross the mind when it’s true friendship -

Blocking her will not fix the problem.

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Get rid of him, he probably already cheated. If he didn’t it shows he has no respect for you .

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Why on earth are you still entertaining either of them??? You shouldn’t have to force loyalty sis!!! Kick both life-sucking-vampires to the bricks and invest your energy elsewhere; where it’s deserved!!! :100::muscle:

Let him do what he wants to do and you will see what he’d rather do.

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You’re not being controlling at all. If she were just a best friend this boundary wouldn’t have been crossed to start with. This likely isn’t the first time it’s happened and they’ve probably had sex before too. I have a lot of guy friends and would never be inappropriate with them because they’re just friends.

Ask yourself what happen if you had done the same thing?

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She could have him🤷🏽‍♀️hes already done it hell continue to do so save your self and send him down the road

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Ohhh hunnie let that :mango:

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They’re not friends…

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That’s how you handled it? By having him block her? How about you get a bf that wouldn’t do that period!

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Leave him or he’ll just end up breaking your heart more than he has already

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When will these ladies understand that YOUR MAN OPENED THAT DOOR! So kick HIS ass out it! She’s only part of the problem but he’s the whole problem! Good luck though!

He doesn’t respect you or the relationship if he’s sexting another girl , leave , you deserve better. If he loved you he wouldn’t even be thinking about another girl

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Girl leave him. It won’t stop. It won’t fix the problem

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Wtf? He definitely needs to cut ties with her or you definitely need to leave him over this that’s definitely not okay at all sounds like something is going on

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Make plans for the next part of your life!

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You should leave his ass! You’re worth more!

She’s his side piece or was

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Why bother? Let her have him. Cheating toad.

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Trade up girl! they deserve each other and you deserve so much better!

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Block her? Girl let her have him and go find yourself a real man that won’t cheat on you! Kick his butt to the curb.

If you have to make him block her and even more so if he feels some type of way about you having him do that then girl just throw him out, she can have him. It won’t change he will just get sneakier. You should t have to make him block anyone :woman_shrugging:t3:

Let them do their thing, without you in the picture. They deserve each other, deceitful mother fuckers. You dont deserve that. Leave himmmmmmmmmm!

Girl… come on. I think you know the answer here and that he was cheating

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Ahtttt ahttt, you better throw him away and go after her next​:woozy_face::woozy_face::woozy_face:

I’d be making life for them living hell!

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Blocking her isn’t going to fix your relationship. That’s only temporary until the next girl he finds to do that with. Move on.

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This is literally happening to me except he is my husband and we were married for might as well be two seconds and he was sexting one of my best friends they say they didnt do anything but obviously the bs he says is just that BS. Your not alone i havent left yet and its hard either way you go its hard and your not alone

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Lol yeahhhhh been there. Get a new man :wave:

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