Am I in the wrong to not want the babysitter we have anymore?

My husband works quite alot and I just got a new job to help contribute to the bills and everything… even though I may not have to for the next month… well as hard as it is to find a babysitter i actually found someone. Only needing them from 2-6 (I leave at 2, go into work at 3, my husband comes home at 6) offered to pay weekly. Now this is one of my deseased husband’s family members who I had faith in to make sure my kids were going to be okay while at work… the time I’ve known her she’s always been upbeat, good with kids, tidy, and respectful. Well, I get a phone call at 6:30 on my first break from my husband that she had put a screw driver through my wall, wrote on my wall with pen and had a bag of frozen chicken in the crockpot without it cooking or anything. Disrespectful is my first thought. Like why would she do something like that… she made an excuse for everything gave me reasons why she thought it wasacceptable and that she has everything to fix it but when it boils down to it… you don’t go to someone else’s HOME and do those those things. Even my KIDS know better than to do it, and she was teaching them that it was okay. We work hard for everything we have… I’m just not understanding why she’s not understanding that it’s not okay. Now she’s telling me I’m making a big mistake and how loving and reliable she would have been… lol and now I’m stuck wondering if I’ll be able to keep this job.

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Am I in the wrong to not want the babysitter we have anymore? - Mamas Uncut

I agree. I would not let her babysit for me anymore.

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… she damaged your property. Let her go

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She doesn’t respect you or your home or your kids. Let her go. Good luck finding a new sitter, dear!

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Somethings wrong somewhere, she would not be allowed around my kids

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What was her rationale for putting a screwdriver through the wall, or writing on the wall? Was she helping with renovations? Because that’s the only time I’d be ok with someone doing these things…, like them planning out a cut by using a pencil or something or cutting into drywall but even then, it’s pretty ballsy to be doing that without permission.

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W.t.f is she like 4 years old .
What grown ass adult writes on someone’s wall .
I’d be telling her to go get her head checked out somethings not right at all

Wait what?! She put a screwdriver through the wall and drew on it? Hell to the no. There is something wrong with her. No matter how much she tries to validate her actions that is NOT right and NOT okay. What’s she going to do to your kids one day and how is she going to try and ignorantly validate that?

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You have to wonder about someone’s mental state who would do things like that… get her away from your kids. Maybe suggest she get help.

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All of that is super odd and I would absolutely not leave my children with her ever again.

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She sounds like a child…that’s very bizarre behavior. Is she mentally okay? That seems extremely off and a sudden change of behavior that drastic can indicate something medically wrong.

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I would tell her thanks but no thanks. Stay the hell away.

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Is there a chance she finally cracked and isn’t no longer great in head mentally

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Once she put the screwdriver through the wall, that tells me she’s off her rocker. There is no way I’d have her around my kids.

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Just because you knew her. Why wasn’t she checked out? I can probably bet that she’s got a history of this type of behavior. Always…always get background checks…no matter who it is

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it sounds as if she has some mental instability issues—and shouldn’t be working with kids. I wouldn’t trust her with my kids, period. Quit ya job or find a mentally stable sitter. These are not the actions of someone with a sound mind. Period. Her mind is not your problem.

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Yeah, that’s a no from me

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Is it possible one of you’re children did that and she is covering for them? Perhaps you’re kids are scared of your reaction? A grown adult dosen’t do those things js the chicken maybe she was preoccupied?

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I really wanna know what her reasonings were. I can’t think of any reason to put a screw driver through a wall or write on the wall!?

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Wait how old is the babysitter?

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yeah she wouldn’t be looking after my kid no more

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No u won’t do now you can chalk that up because you would never be able to get her to babysit your kids again because I wouldn’t but you’re providing for your family take him to actual daycare and find out what the fee 7 plus per kid a month

Absolutely unacceptable. I would definitely go with your better instinct and look for someone else.

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How old is she?? I would love to know her excuses because I’m just baffled!

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Babysitters is the hardest part of having a job I feel. To find someone to replace us seems to be impossible. Let alone have them be reliable. I agree that it does not sound like a good fit though. Keep searching

She sounds like she may be mentally ill. Find a better sitter.

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This seems alittle bizarre

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Sounds like she’s covering for the kids :sweat_smile:

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Yeah thats a little…odd. I’d probably do the same.

Off topic slightly, I’m a school bus driver and my job let’s me take kids to work with me. It was for reasons like finding babysitters and scheduling etc that I became a school bus driver. No weekends, no holidays, my schedule is the schools schedule. Something to think about for any mother in this position

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That’s unacceptable. I’m completely baffled at why she’d put a screwdriver through the wall and write on the wall. The chicken not cooking, I could understand would be a mistake, but I definitely would never allow her to be alone with my children. Something is off there.

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MAYBE NEXT TIME YOU GET SOMEONE
Put in nanny cams so you can be aware of what is going on in your home

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Oh hell no. If she’s doing that to your house do you actually think she’ll treat your kids well? When you get your next sitter install cameras everywhere (but the bathroom of course. I feel I need to say that cause ppl in this group are weird). Check on your kids anytime you get a chance. Trust only at arm’s length.

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This is why I don’t let a damn soul watch my kids!! Get her gone!

Stabbing wall with Tool is not excusable unless your kids tripped her into said wall. Writing on a wall is inexcusable, if she needed paper she could do what most without paper do and write on her hand. As for the frozen chicken I’m not sure about your home but mine eats at about 5-6 so again in my home inexcusable unless power were out and she couldn’t cook. This person is nuts and I would not allow them unsupervised with my kids.

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That’s really strange…

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Who the Hell puts a screwdriver through someone’s wall and then writes on it?!?! No, she would have been out immediately and never allowed to return. There are daycares if you cannot find someone else. Or try care.com

She will hurt your babies

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Not even my 9 year old would do that I’d be concerned why an adult would do those things. Doesn’t sounds like she can take care of kids.

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Why is this even a question?
Are you for real contemplating whether you want to give her a chance to stab one of your kids?

Totally unacceptable. I agree with others, install nanny cams before you get another sitter. But definitely send her down the road.

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Get cameras and a new sitter

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What was her reasoning for all this? Nothing sounds too harsh or like she couldn’t be trusted to watch ur kids, but I am curious as to WHY she wrote on the walls, put a screwdriver thru the wall? The food thing was likely a mistake (forgot to turn it on, got side tracked, pushed the wrong button etc)

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Im confused…you say your hubby works quite alot but then further down say it’s your “deseased husbands family members”
Are u on your 2nd husband?

And let her go.
Not worth the stress

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How old is this human?

I would fire her immediately

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Yes get rid of her ASAP

How old is she? Get someone else now!

Oh wow. How old is the sitter? I’d hire someone else. Care.com. They do background checks.

Wth ya don’t allow her back. Psycho

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Sounds like something is wrong with her

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Why in the world would she think this is even remotely okay?? Definitely find a new sitter!

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it sounds to me like she might just have some sort of mental health issue.

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How old is she? Definitely install cameras in the common areas and request any sitter only stay in the common areas w the children

Get someone else now

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Even at the cost of your job, you should fire her. That is not the signs of a stable person, and definitely shouldn’t be watching your kid alone. There are other jobs that will come your way until you figure it out. Best of luck!

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Download nextdoor app and ur location make a post saying your looking for a reliable babysitter etc also look into care.com also never feel guilty when it comes to your house and your kids you know what’s best for your family sweetheart

Oh, my. It sounds like this person isn’t all there. You have to not let this person watch your kids. You would be better off having a high school girl come in for that period of time. I would check with your neighbors and see if any of them have a 16 year old daughter who would like to make a little extra money. The hours aren’t bad. She would only have to keep the kids entertained and keep them from killing each other and trashing the place… maybe feed them a snack or supper by the time your husband gets home… you could always have something she could put in the oven to heat up. Also if she’s a fairly close neighbor she could walk back and forth to your home. If you have a church, check with the youth pastor and see if any of the girls in the youth group like to babysit.

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I’m a little confused
You say your husband works
But then say “deceased husbands family”

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Need mote info on how a screwdriver got into your wall, put frozen chicken in a crock pot without turning it on and how writing on your wall happened?

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Is she like 12,13, or in her 20s. Basically yiu can’t have a child watch children they will do what children do. Dumb stuff and make excuses.

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Check care.com. They do background checks

I’d like to hear the excuses lol :laughing:

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Hell no! She wouldn’t be watching my kids

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Immediately no… i would not have her back at all

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Oh hell to the no. How old is this person? Who taught her that it’s okay to do that stuff?

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That sounds very scary. But need more info

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She sounds like she is having an episode an needs some mental health care. That isn’t normal.

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How old is she ? Like 10

  Just find another sitter , you can set nanny cameras in your house for your sanity .

I know of a woman who hired a sitter , the sitter will watch the kids at her house , she got cameras set in the house ( she can watch it live on her phone )
The sitter is not allot to have the kids out from the areas that are cover by the camera , neither she can take them to the bathroom ( they are in diapers)

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Deceased family member confused.

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Age, and Why? Nope

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She stuck a screwdriver through your wall and wrote on your wall…. Wtf?

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No let her go. Otherwise you will be worried constantly of what else she might be doing and why pay her to streets you out even more?

Get rid of her now…she is very disrespectful for sure.

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I’d be freaked out to leave my children with her!! No way in hell! Get someone else asap! So sorry that happened to yall!

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I have to know why she said she did those things. And was the screwdriver just stabbed into the wall or what?

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What kind of drugs is she on? Stab somebody’s wall with a screwdriver graffiti your wall and puts frozen chicken in a Crock-Pot and doesn’t turn it on? Something ain’t right. Get a new babysitter

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I’d just someone else.
That’s just terrible she ruined your home and is teaching your children bad behavior:(

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Ok I have done the chicken in the crock pot thing. But the other stuff is unacceptable. Also my 14 yr old watches her sister while I work and they both know better than that. SO yeah ket her go and don’t have her back.

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Wow, that is unacceptable behavior for sure! Get rid of her before someone gets hurt!

How old is this person :joy::joy:

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Find another sitter. She has to go.

Was she trying to entertain your kids by drawing on the walls? Was she trying to hang something? Still unacceptable but what are her reasons. Also i think she was trying to cook the chicken and didn’t turn it on . She sounds super adhd to me!!! My son did some stuff like this but I knew or found out what he was trying to do. Writing on your walls… adhd… forgetting to turn the crockpot on adhd… now she should know not to put a screw in the wall. Even if she does have adhd it’s your choice to do what you think is best.

I’d suggest a mental evaluation asap.

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When in doubt find someone else

I think this is your first red flag. Those things seem very odd and unusual. I wouldn’t let her stay around for more to happen. I’d like to know her reasoning for these things? Maybe the screw driver was an accident? Idk. Why would you write on my walls? Like what?? Something in her head is off

Are you sure your kids didn’t do some of those things and she took the fall?

Nah let her go an don’t worry about it. She sounds like she needs therapy bc she essentially threatened you by telling you that you’re making a big mistake. Like she is intending to do something to you for not letting her keep the job.

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Definitely don’t keep her around

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Hello? She put a screwdriver in the wall

Get that girl away from your kids. Job or no job.

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ALWAYS trust your mommy instinct and you don’t need to try and justify it. Nature gave it to you for a reason :heart:

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Seriously? She sounds like a psycho , I’d keep her away from my home and more importantly my kids :roll_eyes:

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Acknowledge the good she’s done. Not just the bad…just saying.

Do not leave your children with her !!

Uh… what?

I feel like there’s so many missing details here. Either she’s having an episode, or you are, or this is a troll post.

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Let her go change the locks and lock the windows she sounds crazy. Why did she put a screwdriver in the wall?

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Sounds like she may be suffering some sort of mental illness. The screwdriver to the wall concerns me…I wouldn’t leave my children with her.

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Sounds like she had a mental break down. I’d be concerned about what my kids saw and heard. Def. Find someone else.

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idk what the screw driver is all about…that’s not okay. But pen on the wall? washes off…i don’t see what the big deal is with that, shit happens…unless she wrote something? And the chicken in the crockpot….is literally the most ridiculous thing you could have said. Honestly who cares lol it’s chicken and maybe she was planning to cook it but got distracted by your kids she was watching and didn’t get a chance to. The chicken is irrelevant. Sounds like you’re overreacting and being dramatic.