Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Am I weird for thinking this and over reacting? - Mamas Uncut
Let your husband handle this
My dad shares my pictures of my kids to his Facebook often as well. I can’t text or message a photo of them normally without him posting it. It definitely used to bug me but in all honesty with him living states away, I know he’s just a proud grandpa that doesn’t get to see his grandkids often enough to not share pictures so I’ve left it alone. Pick your battles. They wouldn’t send pictures out to people they don’t know
Oh I’d be pretty blunt about it…. “Excuse me… why are you sending out pictures of MY children?!”
She better have a damn good answer 
Girl, block them from your posts. I hate when people love on Facebook and don’t even come see them, then they share pictures like they’re with them all the time lol
It’s your children, your family. Say what you want to. I for one do not post my children on social media. Fir safety reasons.
That just wouldn’t happen!! I would be livid
How does your husband feel about it?
If he feels the same as you, let him handle it.if not, make e a phone to your Sil
I would have your husband deal with it. I would politely ask them not to share photos of your children online without permission going forward (if you didn’t mention it sooner you can’t be overly upset because it’s not common practice for everyone.) If they proceed to share photos then block them on social media and deal with it further, at that time.
Social media is one thing. Using a photo to send out on physical Christmas cards is another. 100% would not be okay with that.
Does she have kids of her own? I think you’re over reacting. Before I had kids my nieces were everything to me, I mean they still are but I have my own family to focus on now. She’s probably proud of them & she loves them. Yes she probably should’ve asked you, but I doubt she meant any harm. Maybe after the holidays ask your husband to kindly bring it up to her, he can tell her that you are private people & aren’t comfortable with their pictures being shared, if that’s how you really feel.
I would just change your privacy settings on your social media platforms to be as private as possible when you post pics. In addition you can put an emoji face over their faces to protect them and their privacy. I would do this while the kids are small and until they’re old enough for their own social media accounts. Your family will notice and get your point. If they ask what’s up then you can discuss your concerns and your boundaries or they get NO pictures. Those are your rights as Mom.
First off I think it’s fucking weird she would use YOUR kids on a Christmas card period! Like how about send one of just herself or not at all! I would definitely let her know how weird it is and definitely crosses the line
I’m going to be the odd one here. It’s also their family too. Not just yours. Be happy family wants to be involved with your kids. It doesn’t matter how private your profile is. Everything that goes on the internet stays there
That would bother me.
Wouldn’t really bother me tbh I would think it’s a nice gesture using the photo on the card maybe she didn’t ask because she wanted it to be a surprise,
I think personally she should have asked first. I would talk to her about at least asking. She might have met no harm, however still kinda odd. My niece and nephew were my pride and joy, but they’re not my kids. I would use my pet or something as a Christmas card before them idk… tread lightly to your sil but set your boundaries for next time.
Super weird. But easily avoided in the future. Don’t post your kids on social media at all.
It depends on her motive. Is she using your kids to make it look like she cares about them or is she just proud?
Not sure why a picture would bother you so much. She’s family not a stranger.
Say something and don’t be afraid to be blunt then, dependinf on how responds…block her!
If it was a pic of her and your children then I think it’s also her pic? I wouldn’t ask permission and I’ve posted pics of my own nieces and nephews without their parents consent on my social media accounts.
If it makes you uncomfortable, then I would explain to her that it does and why. I wouldn’t go into it guns blazing accusing her of being in the wrong though.
She needs to ask they are not her children, she doesn’t get to decide their media presence nor who gets pictures of your children. Just don’t send any pictures to her unless you don’t care that it gets shared with whomever is in her list.
I think you should drop it. She’s auntie, it’s her picture, and it’s a selfie. You’re acting like she’s passing out photos of them in the bath.
and y’know how many times you’ve seen the kids doesn’t mean you can’t or don’t love them and aren’t proud to be related to them.
You are over reacting. They are doing it out of love. Choose your battles because you are also now involving your husband.
That’s creepy weird. Why would she send out a picture of kids who she barely knows? You have the right to be protective of your kids. I’d cut her off from all pictures of my kids. They aren’t yours you don’t make the decisions to put their image out to whoever.
Take the time to look up the dangers of posting children’s photos online. No one should post children’s picture especially without the parents’ permission. Search the facts about the dangers present them to your sister in law and ask threat she makes sure no one outside of family has access.
I don’t think they had anything but good intentions. It sounds like your children are loved and that they have people in their life who are proud. As an aunt I post pictures of my nieces and nephews all the time. Some I have taken myself and some that their momma posted. I don’t ask permission but if I post a picture I try to make sure I tag their momma.
Impress on your husband how dangerous this could be, and have him handle it. His family, his job.
Lol that’s super weird to send Christmas cards out with photos of someone else kids in it. Like merry Christmas! These aren’t my kids but here’s a Christmas card of us!
I never put photos of ANY children on social media without the parents permission
this is weird to me bc I make it a point to see my niece as much as I can so…
You can BLOCK specific people!
I don’t think she had any bad intentions. I’m sure she loves your kids and is proud to be their aunt. This isn’t an issue.
I’d tell them that I raise my kids differently. There’s a lot of child trafficking going on. And their pictures should NOT be seen by people u don’t know.
I fo not post any pictures on Facebook. Too many pedifiles. Out 8their
It would bother me when my MIL shared pics of my LO but now it doesn’t. It’s his grandma. Me personally I wouldn’t post my sisters kids on social media even if they do. I like asking for permission first
Speak up. My sister n mom used to post my kids and I spoke up and said no. Too many creeps. They were hurt and angry the first 2 years then when they realized I’m not changing my stance dropped the issue and learned to respect what I said. There are ppl out there who eill be masturbating yo your kids pictures and you have no clue. This people in this world is sick and gets sicker by the minute. Do not drop it. Speak up
Your husband needs to take care of it. He needs to say something about it.
I dont think this is weird at all. I have a pic of my nephew and boyfriend on my debit card lol. I post pics of him every chance I get. Im proud of him! 
I know how you feel. My son’s bio mom always steals our pictures of my son and pretends like she has been there. Same with my bio dad taking my sister’s kids pictures and acting like he is anything of a grandpa. People are strange.
Get it off your chest. What I get is 1, they are not close. 2. Yes, she should have asked. I feel it would be different if there was an actual bond there.
It’s done. Just ask her please to NOT do it again. Tell her you feel uncomfortable with her using YOUR children’s pictures.
Personally I wouldn’t mind but each person is different so if you are uncomfortable tell them. They might stop talking to you but they will eventually get over it.
Drop it. If privacy is that big a concern to you, stop posting pics of ur kids. We lose all rights to pics after we post them.
Best you can do is report the po photos but that might not sit well with the family.
Drop it! Stop sweating the small stuff!! If it doesn’t bother the child or children just let it go. Be grateful she or they care. Children need everybody that loves them to be a part of their lives &, regardless of how much or little time they spend with them. It could be the other way around & they don’t even acknowledge that they know them, count your Blessings. What harm did it do, none…!!!
I always post pics of my nieces and nephews because I’m very proud of them. One nieces mum used to go mad and always accused me of saying I treated my niece like my own child. What did she expect I had my niece every weekend while her dad worked. I treated her like my I did my son. They both got spoilt the same amount over yrs.
That’s weird for sure.
Unfriend the ones that have pinched your kid’s pics. Be selective about who stays in your social media circle.
This sucks that it makes you uncomfortable and normally I’d be like “hell nah” but it sounds like maybe she’s just proud of her nieces & nephews… some people don’t even consider the dangers that lurk at every corner (especially if she doesn’t have kids of her own) it probably never crossed her mind to ask & she thought she was just showing off her family. If it bothers you enough to make waves (maybe hurt her feelings or embarrass her) then yes, say something; but keep in mind, she will likely not forget how it made her feel. Is it worth it if it wasn’t malicious? 
Nope. Everyone knows to ask me before posting photos of my kids but, I have an abusive ex partner so it’s more to make sure my kids are safe and his not finding out about their lives and what we are up too. Anyone that had a problem with it I have unfriended and blocked if needed more boundaries.
I feel as if it was an innocent mistake and l that she clearly didn’t think she was crossing a boundary. If that is something you wish to not happen then you need to make that known before hand not get upset after it happens. No one is a mind reader! To each their own if this truly offends you but to me she sounds like an awesome Auntie who loves your children dearly. I’d be careful with how you approach it if you decide to because you don’t want your children resenting you in the long run for them not having the family support and love they could’ve had if you would’ve just communicated your boundaries before hand. I understand pictures of children in the internet nothing parents but if someone wants a picture of your child they could just as easily snap the picture while out at the grocery store. I see no I’ll intent on the Aunts part here. Just poor communication regarding your expectations 
I feel as if it was an innocent mistake and l that she clearly didn’t think she was crossing a boundary. If that is something you wish to not happen then you need to make that known before hand not get upset after it happens. No one is a mind reader! To each their own if this truly offends you but to me she sounds like an awesome Auntie who loves your children dearly. I’d be careful with how you approach it if you decide to because you don’t want your children resenting you in the long run for them not having the family support and love they could’ve had if you would’ve just communicated your boundaries before hand. I understand pictures of children in the internet nothing parents but if someone wants a picture of your child they could just as easily snap the picture while out at the grocery store. I see no I’ll intent on the Aunts part here. Just poor communication regarding your expectations
I think if privacy is such a huge concern you shouldn’t post your kids on social media.
You could kindly explain your concerns.
You can set FB to block her seeing all your pics. Don’t bother asking your husband to tackle it, just solve it yourself.
Not ok, especially since you can count how many times she’s come around.
U know how many security cameras and random pictures yr kids in that u don’t even know about and she’s in the background. So she’s already out there. If you knew bout the pic originally than u should’ve know tht it could have been posted it sent out because she liked that picture and this falls under that. Yes there r creeps but 99% of them aren’t looki g for random kids that r dressed, happy, ect they want bad creepy style pics n they can get those anywhere n even if yr sil sent it straight to one of those sick bastards he probably would t bat an eye.
Let your husband talk to his mom.
That’s weird and messed up…you right😳
It’s weird that it’s on a Xmas card. I could see if it was your sister but not sister in law. Good intentions I’m sure but yes, weird.
Don’t put your husband in that position. DO NOT MAKE HIM CHOOSE. Thank goodness she’s proud of them and wants to show off her brother’s kids. If you have issues with her, find another way or you’re going to be alone. He will not take your side on this issue. You’ll look crazy because he knows you really don’t like HER (sil)! jmo
That’s strange. Why would someone put a Christmas card out with someone else’s kids. I would let your husband handle it since it’s his family.
Inappropriate imo. Id be letting her know she’s crossed the line and she’s not welcome to use pics of your kids for anything without permission …given she’s hardly been around them she wouldn’t have pics of them to start with
I feel mixed emotions on this. On the one hand she sounds like shes a proud aunty and it might be a killer pic of her and she wanted to put more of a family vibe out there for Xmas, nothing wrong to me, BUT !!! I would expect her to at least give mom and dad a heads up…
Perhaps she only did that Xmas card for close family and friends, who knows?. but i do feel if u decide to say something it must come from you not your husband… That might cause BIG drama 
You’re not over reacting. Speak up about it. I understand where you’re coming from. She doesn’t come around much but wants to throw the pics around to everyone… no ma’am.
You should never put your husband in the position to choose, defend or mediate between his spouse and family. It will only end badly in the long run even if it seems ok when it’s first done. If you’re irked that grandma hijacks pictures of her grandchildren that are her son’s kids too, I see a divorce in your future. Privacy is one thing to a degree but acting like kids are your possessions and all of it needs to go through you for approval just because you shot them out of your cooter shooter is absolutely ridiculous. They’re his kids too. His mother is just as important as your mother is, as your kids mother and father is to them. Why would you want to stand in the way of that? Why are you so irked that his family loves the kids so much that they want to hijack the pictures? Do you honestly think having certain privacy settings on your page makes it safe to post your own pics to it? Smh 
if that’s the case, I don’t think you really understand how the internet works. Give up trying to control it all, give your husband the equality he deserves as the other parent you chose to have kids with and don’t put him in that position. Maybe she doesn’t come around much because of things like this that you do?
She should have asked first. If she is your Facebook friend, she can share your pics all day long. There is a fine line there. I would just say, hey next time please ask me and leave it alone.
Make it so she can’t see your pictures anymore. She will take the hint
sil??? sister in law???
My grandaughter told me(in a very nice way) that I can not repost pictures of her 4 kiddos unless she ok’s it. I have no trouble doing what she asks…I totally understand. xo
Strange yet I would sit down and talk to them about your concerns and let them know you do NOT want your children exposed without your permission.
Speak up. My in-laws never did this. I didn’t even have to tell them. Respect begets respect.
I had to tell my side of the family coz they’re into social media and posted my kids’ pictures without my permission. They think it’s okay. Just tell your sil in a nic3 way. You don’t know how many pedophiles are out there. Some you might even think you know them, but you don’t. Protect your kids.
you have no Idea how weird ppl are now
Drop it. Appreciate she feels love towards your kids. No one is going to target your kids because their aunt used a picture of her brothers children on her card.
Yeah thats kinda weird in my opinion. One if she has only been around them a few times and two making cards with her and someone else’s kids. Aunt or not she should have asked. I would just tell her, I have certain settings to monitor who sees my kids pics so if you could ask next time that would be appreciated.
I wouldn’t get your husband involved but I wouldn’t be as nice as u that’s completely bang out of order !
Ask your husband to say something first. If he doesn’t then that’s your place. Just confront her and say hey I don’t appreciate you using pictures of my kids. Especially when we and the kids very seldom even see you. Don’t let it happen again. And then ask her if there’s a reason that you rarely see her.
I would show concern that she would make up a family picture with your family. Is she alone? Does she suffer depression? Maybe this is a cry for help!
I think this is petty as hell.
If it were your family doing it it’s be different. What if it was your parents? Would you have an issue with it?
My sister doesn’t have kids of her own and lives hours away so she doesn’t get to see my kids much, but when she does get to, she posts photos/videos with them to show them off. She’s their Aunt. It doesn’t bother me.
Let it go.
Definitely think your overreacting but you have every right to feel how you feel. Posting a picture doesn’t put your kids in harms way. Now if she posted it with an address full names private info that’s different. But a picture? Come on now.
You’re definitely overreacting. As a previous post said, do you think just because you have privacy settings on your Facebook that you THINK it prevents people from seeing what you post? I completely blocked my dad from my first Facebook thinking he wouldn’t find out, and then he had someone else go and pull up everything on my page even though it was privacy set to “only me”. Your husband shouldn’t have to be in a position to pick between him and his family. Who’s to say he didn’t give them permission? Be glad you have in laws who obviously love and adore your children. Because you could be stuck in a position where they absolutely hate your guts, and the way you’re speaking now, it sounds like you’re headed down that path. You can’t dictate what people choose and choose not to do on THEIR Facebook. If that’s the case, you need to completely cut off contact from them and the rest of the world to prevent your kids from being posted. 
I think you are right & they are wrong, So with that said, as your grandmother as she posts pictures of your kids, then don’t post pictures of your kids on any social media, because anyone can download them without your permission 
never post any pictures of my grandkids unless they are when they were toddlers, Now talk to your SIL & explain how you & your husband feels about this because of the people whom are out there
My MIL still asks me if she can use my pictures, even though I’ve been telling her for 5 years that she doesn’t have to ask. I appreciate her consideration, but I know she loves my kids and would NEVER post them if she thought anyone on her friends list would be weird. She told me the first time she posted that she only has immediate friends and family on her fb, and I trust her.
However, if you just sit down and explain your feelings calmly, they should respect you and your children’s privacy. Good luck!
What’s the big deal?
If you post on the internet, it’s on the internet! There is no privacy 
No that’s not weird, those are her grandchildren and she has every single right. Doesn’t matter how often she see them, she loves them and your being ridiculous about it.
You are right to feel this way. It’s why I don’t even post anything about my children. Privacy settings or not. That way nothing can be stolen and shared. The internet is creepy and I’m not subjecting my children to that.
What do you do if someone is taking pictures in public? Seems you can’t control everything
I don’t think it’s weird. But as a mother who decided to no longer post pictures of my children or personal life on social media anymore I would want to have a simple talk toblet her know I don’t want my children’s faces on social media, but I have no control over what she does next in the end. I’m glad she’s proud of her neices and nephews. Some people just don’t understand the importance of internet safety. It took me time to figure it out.
My sister puts pictures up of my kids and her I don’t mind coz she asks and will put me and my niece & nephew
Or I love my niece and nephew ect
If she was to put me and my kids
Or that then I’d be fuming
& If you know the picture was used as someone close to you told you or showed you
Most likely she has only sent it to close friends and family
I would just say to her it’s lovely that your so close to the kids
But can you see them more please & also ask before using pictures with them in it please
Thanks x
Hey not sure if you know this…but it doesn’t really matter your settings…once it online anyone can find it. But I do think it’s weird she used your kids for her Xmas card…tell her to get a dog and use that for her cards:joy:
You DO NOT post any pictures of my kids unless I give you permission, y’all really on here saying she’s over reacting and its not a big dea. Maybe y’all DGAF who has pictures of your kids but you probably should, idgaf who you are. Confront her and tell her not to do it again, my sister did that shit. Saw my first son 3 times in his first year of life and then stole pictures off MY fb and put them on HER Instagram, screaming she’s the best aunt in the world… no tell her she does it again and you’ll get her in trouble, idk what most of y’all are on BUT IT IS ILLEGAL TO SHARE PICTURES OF A KID WHO IS NOT YOURS WITHOUT EXPLICIT PERMISSION. Y’all probably should GAF more, Just saying. Be better humans.
I told our family that they weren’t allowed to post pictures of our daughter and if we choose to post one to not share it… and if they can’t respect that then they will be removed and will no longer receive pictures.
But we also never really post our daughter on fb. I think we have maybe a total of 3 times and one didn’t have her face in it.
Oh wow…. First world problems
Are your children not the nieces and nephews of said Sister in law? I’m confused. Lol. Why would this be an issue. Even with your privacy settings the world can still see things. I think you need to drop it. Obviously the family dynamics aren’t close at all(poor kids limited to only parents love) . I would never tell a sister or sister inlaw what to do with their nieces or nephews unless they are physically or mentally abusing them
You have a right to your feelings 100%. But, sometimes we need to pick our battles. I think this is something you should just let go.
I would just ask them to make sure their privacy settings on fb is super private to friends only or something if they’re gonna post pictures of your kiddos. And just let them know their is alot of creeps in the world so please make sure your setting are very private. That still allows her to post pictures but gives you piece of mind that not everyone can see your kids.
I think it’s weird she sent her and niece and nephews on a Christmas card in general no matter how close she is to them. Lol