Anyone else have but but not like kids?

Does anyone else find after time being a mum that find out they don’t actually like kids? Or is that just me? I have two kids who I love with my entire being. I would do anything for them as my children BUT I don’t like them. I talk to them and support them and try to raise them to be good open-minded and respectful children. For the most part i enjoy being around my own kiddos - they give me space and come to me when they need me. However, I have learned a strange unsettling truth about myself over the years. I can’t stand children and I am fully aware it’s not their fault. I was a nursery teacher before i had my own kids and there was always one kid i wanted to stay away from me at all times because she was just awful. Her attitude was that of a 40yr old person who had all their stuff together and looked down on EVERYONE and i couldn’t stand that kid. Both my kids are young teens and one of my kids just drives me crazy because just like a teen they think they know better despite all the proof proving otherwise and I realized that I love my kid but can’t stand their personality. Am I an awful mum? I tell my kids every day that I love them. I hug them and help them. I do all the things i am supposed to do as a parent. My hubs finds it hilarious that i figured out i hate kids and he pointed out i can’t watch tv with teens and kids because i end up yelling about her stupid they are and he laughs his ass off at me. Please tell me I’m not alone.

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Anyone else have but but not like kids?

Sometimes it just happens that way. Lucky for you, they won’t be kids forever! Nobody likes every single human, and sometimes it ends up being your own kids, because personalities just clash.
Do your best to love and support them. Make sure they never know how you feel.

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Get some therapy and maybe your kids too probably hurts their feelings they can feel the way you feel

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Funny, sad , but yet very understandable . They are teens just a few more years. Then kick them out :rofl:

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I hate other peoples kids. I love mine to death but when someone asks me to babysit, it makes my skin crawl lol

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I could have written this. Ask my own kids lol. And the funny thing is, kids flock to me. It’s like uhgggg go find ya mommy. I’d never be mean or cruel. Or neglect a child. But man. I have three of my own, raising my granddaughter, I’d do anything for them and love them more than my own life. And heaven help the person that ever hurts them. But I dislike kids. Lmao. The universe did not understand the assignment.

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I say this with all due respect and sincerity but you need therapy. You may have postpartum depression that was never fully addressed. Even if u tell them u love them and do all u can if u have these feelings kids aren’t stupid and they can sense when something is off and just not right. Plz seek someone professional to talk to and sort out your feelings. Also if you can’t stand their personalities it could just be a phase or stage that you dislike not their personalities. Like right now my kids are preteens and one is feeling his oats and how far he can push boundaries. We have it sorted out but I can’t stand the way he acts some days. I will pray for you and wish you the best. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

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Also largely kids are just little jerks many days :rofl::rofl:

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I love my 2 boys but my 14 yr old I can’t stand to be around. He’s just at that age where he’s obnoxious and I always say (not to him) that I love him but can’t stand him

Nope absolutely not alone. I hear ya. I love my 3 but my good I love a break lol xx

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I’ve gone through a period like that but it went away, try some counseling maybe?

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I’ve never been a kid person myself. I LOVE the hell out of my kid and want to be around her 24/7. She’s gonna get sick of me lol. I also love my friends kids, but I don’t care for strangers kids

I like kids more then adults! I don’t like to say hate, but, i dislike my kids sometimes which i think most parent’s go through time to time.

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:flushed: Seek therapy. Your kids deserve better.

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I love and adore my kids…that being said, I never wanted kids and got these 2 while using birth control…God had bigger plans than I did! While I love them immensely, some days I don’t like them very much. Especially my teenager…because she’s a surly, rude know it all. I remember also being a surly, rude know it all at her age. I remember disliking my parents but still loving them. We go through cycles. I’m waiting for the day we are both a little more mature and can appreciate each other again. Hang in there mom. This too shall pass…

Not alone. I think this completely normal…

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Im gonna say, totally normal :joy: Im with you and appreciate you saying it out loud.

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I think it’s so disgusting how you “mothers” are on here saying how you hate & dislike YOUR kids. If you didn’t or don’t like kids don’t have them. But your children shouldn’t have to live with knowing that their only “tolerated”. I LOVE my children

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In my experience if you are finding them to be repellent, you likely have your own buried traumas to heal around the situations & behaviors that arise that make you ‘not like them’. If it’s true that you just don’t actually like them, you are fooling yourself if you think you can hide that from them. Why you don’t like them is ALL about the work you need to do for yourself and them. They are sovereign beings and the way you teach them to relate to themselves and others will impact the rest of their lives (and humanity). Full stop.

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Wow. I pray your teens aren’t reading this. I feel terrible for them. I’d wanna die if my mom told me that or I read that somewhere. Kids can be jerks but they are learning. Probably should’ve figured this out prior to having kids but it’s too late now. I pray you learn to like your kids because I’m sure they are awesome.

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My mom hated kids and she had 11 of them. There is a couple of mine whom I avoid lol!

I dislike the stress associated with kids. I have a sensitive personality myself. It has always felt like anything I or my kids did someone disapproved & critised or bullied me over it even though they do the same or their kids are disobedient too. Then I have 1 who just like me. He’s my mini me. We can’t stand each other. :rofl:

I love kids but my husband didn’t. He loved our kids, but he couldn’t stand other peoples kids.

Ashley Gonzalez lmfao

You are not alone :rofl::joy:. I’m the exact same way. I even worked at several different daycares and learning centers even church nursery you name it. I have one kid and I’m the number one person to say F them kids. I’m also a substitute teacher who loves to reject a job depending on the grade.

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For those saying you need therapy and your kids deserve better (at least you love your kids. There’s way too many kids with deadbeat parents who give zero craps about them, like cmon). I think this is and can be completely normal. I also do not like kids. I love my son, but other kids (and sometimes my son when he gets an attitude) drive me crazy and I am not a fan lol. I was never raised around little kids and I knew going into having kids I wasn’t a huge fan of other people’s kids. I’m awkward around groups of kids and have no idea what I’m doing or what to say, but I think it’s normal. Like you I love my son and would do anything for him but there are days he pushes my buttons and I don’t like him very much. It happens. We’re humans. We’re not supposed to click with everyone. I love my husband but don’t like him some days. I think it’s all relatively normal. Also, not against therapy if it’s something YOU want and think you need for your own self-growth.

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I think it’s normal. I have three babies and they are my ENTIRE WORLD but I can’t stand kids. Only mine, and my nieces and nephews and best friend’s kids!

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I hate listening to mine talk about Minecraft :laughing: but I adore them and enjoy our talks and time spent together. You’re missing out on the best parts of being a mother. Seek therapy.

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Nope you’re not alone. I used to work in a daycare myself but after having my own children I will not watch anyone else’s kids but mine. I do not want anything to do with any other child(babysitting wise) but my own.

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Not at all your feeling are valid and I’m sure a lot of us are there or have been there. I ABSOLUTELY can not stand my oldest! I love her so much but she’s freaking awful! The teen years are the worst.

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You are not a bad mom. I love my kids with all of my heart, but sometimes their behavior drives me up the wall. Like you, I tell and show my kids that I love them every day, I wake them up sweetly, I tuck them in and tell them I love them and kiss and hug them, I listen to them and am supportive of their feelings etc. I do my very best to not let them see when I am not so happy to be around them. It’s absolutely normal to not like someone’s behavior, whether they are an adult or a child. Everyone is different, some people love playing with kids and some don’t. It doesn’t make you a bad mother. If you didn’t try to make them feel loved, secure and wanted every day like you do, then I might call your parenting into question. Plus, teenagers are hard! My oldest is 10 and she has a nasty little attitude on her that can get under my skin…but like you, I’m trying to raise well-adjusted, respectful and responsible adults so we check that attitude fast in our house lol! No one can prepare you for motherhood, no amount of books and advice does it justice for how hard it can be sometimes. Don’t be so hard on yourself, you love your kids and you are doing your best. :heart:

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We put up with our own kids but I’m same tbh other people’s kids I dint like them either lol

Y’all acting like the lady said she mistreats her kids! I’m sure the lady doesn’t tell her kids that!

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No you’re not alone. My best friend is this exact same way, except she only has 1 kid and he’s basically grown.

I love my kids but yea I don’t like em aha. and I don’t like other people’s kids. BUT BUT I will do anything for a child in need…

Your honesty needs to be acknowledged, so I’ll give you that.
However, I feel terrible for your kids & all the other kids of the parents on here saying they feel the same.
Please seek counseling for yourself. There maybe some deep rooted issues going on with you. This is no fair to the kids who didn’t ask to be here, & without a doubt, may feel unwanted, regardless of what you say, ie: I love you, cuz the way you’re feeling, is not love. And what about grandkids?
I just can’t understand feeling this way towards your child.

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I’ve always had a running joke that I don’t like other peoples kids and I just barely liked my own kids​:woman_shrugging: My girls are my whole world and I love them to the ends of the earth, As babies-toddlers I adored them. As tweens-teens ughhh absolutely shoulda put them in boarding school​:roll_eyes::rofl: But now they’re 30 & 26 and they are my best friends :purple_heart::purple_heart:

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Wait … So you worked in a nursery and knew you hated children then, yet you went on to have children yourself and now you are shocked that you now hate your own kids?

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I think that’s all of us :woozy_face::woozy_face::woozy_face:

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Anybody who says they absolutely love being a mom 100% of the time and never feels this way, absolutely isn’t around their kids enough :joy:

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Yip count me in as well

Welcome to parenthood! We’re all doing the best we can. I’ve got 2 and they are 20yrs apart! :exploding_head::woman_facepalming:t3: both boys. Both equally frustrating and annoying. Can’t stand them 90% of the time, the other 10% I absolutely adore them. Love them without question, but being a parent is hard and absolutely nobody has their shit together, we’re all struggling. One day at a time.

My thing is I like my own kids and kids who behave in a similar manner to the way I have taught my kids to behave but there is a lot of kids I just can’t stand to be around because of the way they behave, I just keep my distance from other people’s kids.

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Whew girl, you kinda stumbled on to the best well known secret all moms share.

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I’m pretty sure my biological mother felt the same way and that’s why she put us in foster care and then up for adoption. 🤷🏻

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I think God made teenagers so that when they leave the nest we wouldn’t miss them as much :joy:

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You need psychiatric help. Seriously I’m not joking at all. Eventually you will slip up and they will find out how you feel. And I can’t think of anything more heartbreaking than finding out your Mom doesn’t like you.

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Keep in mind, they don’t always like you either. I have moments I don’t like what they did or they get on my nerves but I can’t say I don’t like them. Other people have kids I don’t like it all though.
That said, if you consider it an issue, seek help. It’s actually an emotional connection issue.

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It doesn’t sound like you hate kids, it sounds like you do not like annoying kids. Especially teenagers. Well a lot of people do not like teenagers and that is normal!

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So pretty much you are insecure, if a small child can make you feel inferior. And you dislike teenagers for being teenagers.

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SOME KIDS that act ugly I can’t stand, usually kids are a joy to me. The ones that are rude and act ugly I don’t want me or my children around people like that but the super cute and sweet children are always so fun and funny.

I don’t think disliking kids necessarily makes you a bad mum. Not gunna lie tho it’s bizzare to me that you dont like these little people you helped raise into who they are. I mean, sure my kids can get on my nerves and I don’t like the way they’re acting but I like them as the people they are

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Teenagers are HARD!! I have 4 girls 3 are teens
I love them but they suck sometimes🤷‍♀️ I don’t like other peoples kids either

I think you’re normal. My mother to used to tell me, I always love you but I don’t always like you. That being said it taught me that in moments where I was unhappy with my mother or something she did I could not like her in that moment or not even like her in one particular aspect but never changed me loving her. My own kids have learned that they can not like everything I do and they can not like me sometimes but doesn’t mean they don’t or can’t love me as well.

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I love my kids but dislike other people’s kids. I always disliked kids but everyone kept telling me it would be different when I had my own… yes somewhat it is different but I have realized I am just sensitive to all the things kids bring, mess, loudness, touch, emotions, and just being kids. I have to take a lot of count to 10 and deep breaths because they didn’t choose to be here so I do my best to not show how I truly feel. I love them but they can be a lot for me. I have noticed as my kids get older it does get easier for me. I think as long as you love them and show them how to be good humans you are doing your best. Unfortunately society puts a lot of pressure on women to have kids and we feel it like a ton of bricks on us. Some of us give into those pressures and probably shouldn’t have, so we do our best. Hugs and don’t feel like you are alone there are other moms out there that feel this way.

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It’s not that you can’t stand kids, it sounds like you don’t mind them. What it sounds like you don’t like is someone else being right lmao I FEEL THAT MAMMA

You’re only a bad mom for it if you treat the kids poorly because of it. As long as they aren’t emotionally neglected who cares if you hate kids. Sucks it took you so long to figure it out.

I adore my own children. It’s everyone else’s that’s a problem for me :rofl::rofl::rofl:

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I have found that I like my own kids but not so much other peoples lol

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I’ve always loved children, and have 3 of my own. I saw a comment that said if a Mom says they 100% love their children, they aren’t being truthful. I can whole heartedly say, I 100% love my children. I have a total of 5 children, but my twin boys were born early and passed away. I feel like being a Mom is what I was born to do. It’s my passion. Those 3 kids and my husband are my world. That being said, not everyone feels that way. I doesn’t make you a bad Mom or an awful person to think the way you do. We all have different opinions and I root for every Mom out there. Momming is hard! I love how you said you are teaching your kids to have an open mind. Me too. I want them to love fiercely, no matter the differences. This thing is ran on love. Good luck Momma!

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Yeahhh that’s not normal… teens are annoying as hell but to not like your own children is a little much. I bet they can feel the energy you give off about not liking them and eventually they will resent you big time! It doesn’t matter if you hug,kiss, support them and tell them you love them. They can and will be able to tell you don’t like them. I’d honestly seek help with ways to cope about it so you don’t start showing it, that’s if you haven’t already.

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This post & these comments are disgusting :face_vomiting:
No wonder our future generations feel like they are twisting in the wind with no direction. Noone seems to care because, well they are too self absorbed to care about children…

Pretty sad :nauseated_face:

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That’s unfortunate. You raised them, so…. :woman_shrugging:t3:

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You can 100% love your kids and not LIKE them. It’s hard to like a know-it-all teen. Just know that they’ll grow out of that phase and your relationship will be better once they’re older. You will probably like them more then. Just hang in there.

I mean, in all reality, they probably hate you right now, especially if you implement any boundaries and rules (which a good parent does). They’re in their rebellious stage, so they’re hating any type of restraints. And you sense that from them, which might be part of the reason you feel the way you do right now.

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I loathe children. Very rarely will I find one tolerable. Kids are just assholes today. :woman_shrugging:t3::joy::joy:

Its the teenage stage… 100% normal at this time :joy::joy::joy:

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Teens are hard. You will get past this stage.

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i love my kids. but i hate others. if that makes sense. can’t stand kids that are disrespectful little assholes. my kids get on my nerve n at times i dont like them but like…i think every parent is like that ONCE

News flash: ALL teens think they know everything. It’s not just a characteristic that your teen has.

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You are not alone! I am the exact same!!!

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I love my kids but in general I don’t enjoy being around other people’s kids. Before I was a parent I was a nanny for a family with 8 children but I’d never want to do that now. I don’t think theirs anything wrong with what you feel. My oldest son is 18 and the last year was straight hell with him. He is slowly starting to become a young man but as he looked for his way he drove me crazy things were beyond stressful, now my next child 10 is giving me a run for my money so to speak.

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You sound like maybe your the 40 yr old who’s looking down on everyone.

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You shouldn’t have children. I have two sons . They are the love of my life. May younger son is 40, married to a wonderful girl , they are desperate to have a child. And people that don’t like children , have children? How lucky are you !!!

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Yo. Teenagers can be real dicks lmao. I love my kids but yes, they can be dicks. You sound like a good mom with big feelings n most of these perfect moms probably have toddlers still :laughing:

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I love my kids. I love spending time with them. I hate everyone else’s kids.

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My son is currently at that stage where he just really acts like an A HOLE. He is a pre-teen and literally has an attitude about everything. It’s hard being around him most times & yes there are times I really don’t like him. :woman_shrugging:t4:. Love him unconditionally but that doesn’t mean we always mesh well. That’s why I have decided no more kids for me 1 was plenty.

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I understand I love my kids but my boys are little dicks. You love them just not the choices they make.

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I would literally die for my kids, I love them so freaking much it physically hurts sometimes but there’s definitely times I don’t like them. Im sure theres plenty of times they don’t like me either.
Other people kids can get stuffed too, don’t like them much either.

You’re not alone. I love my own and my nephews and nieces. Often even my friends kids. However, I don’t much like kids. I would prefer to spend my time not around any. Lol

Me! Lol all day every day! Does that mean I show it? Absolutely not! My daughter knows nothing but love and happiness and rainbows lol me on the other hand? There are some days if I could drive my car off a cliff, I would LOL :rofl::rofl:

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Lol about kids knowing everything- my son is 9 and he firmly believes he knows every fact !! Well, I think it means they have so much confidence which is amazing and we should build it in the right way.

Maybe teach them how to present the facts and also have a listening ear to others facts too.

Oh well, parenting isn’t easy for sure. :slightly_smiling_face:

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I have a total of 5 children…and I love every min of it…good and bad…it’s what I was born to do im proud of each and everyone of them…I love them wih all my heart…I could never hate any of my kids.

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They’re teenagers. Do you not remember being one and thinking you had all the answers. They’ll grow up and realize they don’t know everything . Hopefully.

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No ur not… I don’t like kids either… i habe 4 of them which i adore… nieces and nephews I love but i don’t like kids… my older children know that cuz they say it to their friends all the time… No I’m not ashamed of it… cuz even if i don’t like kids I would never ill treat them… I treat them very well…

This is exactly why I won’t put my kids in daycare, because people like some of you who have deep rooted issues and they mistreat children

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The bottom line is that you love them. Let them be, let them grow, they are unique individuals just like you and me. Patience.

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I love my kids but other kids drive me up a wall. I always thought I loved kids when I was younger but now I cant stand them lol. You are not alone!

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Maybe because you are just like the child you didn’t like at daycare and maybe you see yourself in your own child

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:joy::joy: Every parent at one point or another lol. Teenagers are a different story, little kids are easy compared to teenagers… just wait you said a young teenager that’s to me like 13 or 14 wait until 15,16,17 :joy: they become real ‘Know it all’s’ my daughter has ALL the answers but can’t make it to first period on time to save her life, she got us in trouble w the truancy ppl. She’s at the H.S on time but they spend an extra 10/15 minutes in the bathroom doing each other’s makeup :lipstick: :expressionless:

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I dont hate my kids but i hate being a mother most days. I have ptsd and being pregnant with them destroyed my mental health in very different ways and my son destroyed my body. I hate the constant touching and the work is never done just endless appointments, cleaning, feedings poop

Sidenote: I can deal with the attitude but Holy shit can we talk about the smell?! Why do teenage boys smell no matter how often they shower someone please send help or candles idfk :sob:

I feel sorry for your future grandchildren.

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Love my kids. But sometimes I don’t like them. I feel ya

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I’ve told my 12 year old that a time or two, “I love you, but I really don’t like your attitude/ behavior right now.” When he’s being an ass.
My oldest is almost 13, and I get sighs when it’s chore time, grunts for answers, yells to try & get what he wants … like a caveman. …

St the end of the day your children are their own people too and we can’t like everyone :joy::woman_shrugging:t5:

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I think love and like are different things. I have no doubts that you love your kids and provide for them and do all the things to be a good mom. But I think it’s completely normal to not like them always. My mom always told me that I didn’t have to like my brother but she knew I loved him because if anyone messed with him I’d get involved.

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Good friend told me 20 years ago you won’t like your kids between age 14-18 years old. My 1st thought was how aweful then my 3 sons became those ages and I fully understood why some species eat their young

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Me. I love my daughter to death, but I hate kids.

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Jeez I certainly hope that your children don’t read this :flushed:

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