Do I need permission from my husband to visit my family?

I wouldn’t say ask him if you can go. But telling him youre going ___day. You don’t need permission.

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Permission? You mean like, how a child needs Permission to visit their friends…

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No u dont need permission. He sounds controlling .

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You should never need permission to visit family. Of course it’s nice to say hey babe goin to see the family if you would like to go. Don’t let anyone keep you away. When your Mama is gone it won’t matter and you will hold it against him cause you will feel like he kept you from going.

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You should be able to visit your family any time. Why is he so controlling? Does he get that way with other aspects of your life? Other than informing him ,&checking if he has other obligations that you have to participate in, no per.ission needed! It doesn’t sound like you see your family that often.

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:triangular_flag_on_post: :triangular_flag_on_post: :triangular_flag_on_post:
I would make him the ex husband as soon as you can.

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Please leave this marriage. This is so toxic its scary.

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This is a MAJOR RED FLAG :triangular_flag_on_post: :triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post: girl, there’s a reason he is wanting to separate you from yourfamily. If I was you, I would tell him to suck a fat one and go see my family anyway :woman_shrugging:t2:

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I’ll be damned if I ever asked permission — lol if it was suggested someone would be getting woke real fast!

No you don’t need his permission. Just tell him you are going.

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Just go and let him be mad for a little while :woman_shrugging: LOL. That’s what I do!

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Please go see your family!!

One day they won’t be here anymore

My ex husband got pissed at me for going to see my dying father who lived across town
My ex husband got pissed when I visited my mom or had her come over to visit

They are both gone now

PLEASE GO SEE YOUR FAMILY! Money comes and go Family is everything!

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You don’t have to ask anyone to go do anything, you’re an adult. Wouldn’t he feel foolish if you went and visited and didn’t come back because he thinks he’s your father?

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He’s a controlling ass!! RUN!!

This is classic controlling behavior. He has moved you away from friends and family. He is trying to control you monetarily. This has red flags all over it. Run :running_woman: fast,run far.

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I work an hour away from home - but I’m betting ol boy don’t let you work either so…

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This is abuse. He is trying to isolate you to gain even more control over you.

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I’m wondering what other controlling and potentially abusive characteristics he has. Cause if he’s got this one so strongly; there’s more. He sounds like a narcissist.

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They haven’t made the man to keep me away from my family

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I didn’t even have to read that…fuck no you don’t need permission. You don’t need permission from anyone to see your family.

On more than one occasion, I have lived an hour+ from my family and my SO would encourage me to visit ever weekend. I’ll be damned if I, a grown woman, have to ask permission to do ANYTHING.

The traits of a narcissistic control freak .What then don’t buy clothes don’t buy makeup don’t treat the kids because if you l
Start he will control every aspect of your life!!! Let him rant away tell him your not a child and certainly won’t be asking permission to see family…

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You shouldn’t need permission shouldn’t matter how long you stay if it was my family I would go more often not answer his calls while I’m there

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Family is the most important part of your life, what’s 2 hours drive a day when you go to see them, he’s controlling you.
I would give him 4 options,
1 you meet halfway
2 they come to you
3 you go to them
4 he either likes it or lumps it and if he lumps it the doors there

Tuh I wish mine would try it! But I don’t entertain people who even think they can control what I do :woman_shrugging:t4:

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He is wanting to control you.

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Control!!! You need to leave that relationship asap if he can’t acknowledge he has a problem and address it with counselor/therapy.

Permission??? He’s not your mom or dad you don’t need Permission to see your family

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Sounds like a fucking asshole. He should be more than happy to go with you or say bye babe enjoy your time.

Um no… you don’t need permission from anyone to do a damn thing …

My goodness. When hell freezes over. You tell him but
Ask him?. No way.

This is him controlling you. Classic narcissist behavior. Go visit your family…

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Sounds like your husband is controlling you. That’s YOUR FAMILY. You should be able to go and see them ANYTIME you want without asking. One day your family won’t be here. Your marriage won’t last long because of his narcissistic behavior.

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This is 100% abuse. I lived it for too many years. Please leave him. It only gets worse.

What kinda man has a problem with you going and spending the day with your family? Wtf. Girl go visit your family. Let him fucking cry about it. That’s insane.

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There’s a difference between asking permission and talking with him to make a plan. He sounds controlling. You shouldn’t ask permission. You can always ask more as a respect thing than actual permission. You have a right to see them

Is this behavior something new?
Has he asked you not to go to places before?
I would look back in time and see if there is a history there you may not have noticed because prior to that it wasn’t about your family it was something else.
I would also sit down and ask him to be fully honest with you about why he has concerns.
Do any of those concerns have something to do with why you have chose to move further away to begin with?
Did he just have a loss? Job, family member, additional stress?

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I’d be divorced so fast

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I’d never ask to go see my family… even if they were 6 hours away. If I want to go, I’ll go. That’s family and he’s being ridiculous.

He’s trying to control you. Leave.

Nope however just let him know or let him go with. If he says u need permission then its a control thing and drop him

Needing permission no … letting him know your going and how long is one thing unless his worried about car troubles … so letting him know how the trip is going is ok or ask him to go with you … do you see alot of his family?

No you do not need permission but a heads up would be courteous such as hey on Wednesday we will be gone all day visiting my family. Its not like youre leaving country

You​:face_with_symbols_over_mouth:don’t :face_with_symbols_over_mouth:ask​:face_with_symbols_over_mouth: your​:face_with_symbols_over_mouth: husband :face_with_symbols_over_mouth: for​:face_with_symbols_over_mouth: permission :face_with_symbols_over_mouth:to​:face_with_symbols_over_mouth: do​:face_with_symbols_over_mouth: shit

Don’t let him keep you away from your family. If you do, you’ll be very sorry. You don’t need his permission :face_with_raised_eyebrow:

Just go. He’s your husband not your parent. I live over two hours away from my brothers and I make trips up to see them. If he has an issue, that’s his issue.

Let him know you’re going but not ask permission.

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I’d leave that SOB !

I go stay the night at my mom’s with my kids all the time. I would never ask permission for that

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Oh no he sounds way to controlling, and it will get worse. I wonder if that’s the only thing he’s controlling about.

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Red Flag for future domestic abuse… leave and don’t go back

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He’s got control and trust issues

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I’m disheartened by how many people are saying this is control. I mean, maybe he is, maybe he isn’t. But to go straight there without knowing any other part of his side? That’s crazy to me!
Maybe he’s hurt cause she’s going without him, maybe he feels left out, maybe he would like more communication, maybe he was planning something with his kids, etc…the list can literally go on forever.
She says he fights with her, but leaves out any part of what he says except “trying to save money.” And even with that little bit, maybe it’s not a lot of money being spent, but it’s still more than they’ve spent before since it wasn’t an expensive before they both decided to move over an hour away.

Too much information missing here to make assumptions.

Relationships revolve around communication. And if he has valid concerns regarding her going, they need to be heard and take time to compromise.

Permission never needs be received to see family. But there is a fine line between getting permission and being on the same page with that subject.

Maybe he hasn’t communicated exactly what he’s feeling yet. Thus, making her feel like she needs permission to go.

Y’all just need to sit down and have a real conversation on why he doesn’t want you to go OR go that particular weekend. Or, maybe why he would hate for you to be gone 2 weekends in a row.
To me, being gone 2 weekends in a row without me, is a valid reason to be upset.

But the real reason needs to be expressed. From there, you can decide for yourself if that’s controlling or not. You know him better than the rest of us.

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I’d communicate it with him.
My husband always comes with me bc we live 3 hours away & he knows I get sleepy driving.

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Hell no. He can screw off! Controlling much?! You deserve much better, he should encourage you to go see your family and support you. Give him an advance notice and if he still continues with this controlling b.s you should really think about the position he is putting you in and allow yourself the happiness and freedom you deserve.

Permission!:rofl::rofl: he’s your husband not father. and you’re an adult. A heads up that you’re going, he can’t deal, that’s his problem, if he tries to argue, I’m guessing by cell phone, turn it off!

Ummmmmm…first off I’m glad you still go and see them, second…he is way too controlling.

Never ask your husband permission for crap! My ex tried this mess…notice I said EX! He’s a control freak ditch him!

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Why would you ask to go take your kids to see your Mom is my question…
You should have laid down the lines with him when he got mad the last times you’ve visited your family,let him know that your mom and family matter to you.Any normal man would not get mad at you for visiting your family.He sounds very controlling, how do you STAY with a man like that? Why would you want your kids to see such weird behavior from him? That’s very odd …

You go girl! Don’t need his permission

If it is financial reason I would understand. Maybe go every few months and stay a week. Try to figure out a way that u r driving less but staying longer. My mom lives 10 minutes away and I don’t need to see her once a week.

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He sounds like he is just trying to control you. You shouldn’t have to ask to see your family!

I see red flags!! It’s your family for crying out loud :woman_facepalming:t2:

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Um you moved away and he’s trying to be mean about you seeing your family? Sounds kind of isolating

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Just say I’m going if you want to go be ready if not I’ll see you when I get back.

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How does he feel about you spending time with friends?
My ex started having problems with me seeing my friends, them it turned into problems with me seeing my family. Then if I left the house.
I hope it’s not the case, but there maybe a problem if he wants to control you.

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Hmm no you should have to ASK your husband if you can see family. I tell my husband “hey this day I’m going to my brothers house” and thats all fine but i do not have to get permission to go or do anything and neither should you. Marriage doesn’t =ownership over another person

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No you don’t need permission. If he gets mad too bad for him

You shouldn’t need his permission. Let him know obvi. Ahead of time. Of he tries to fight ignore him. Its your family he shouldn’t get mad about it. ESPECIALLY if he is able to do the same thing.

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Permission no… a nice,
Im going to see my mom’ or who ever, he can go or not. Does he ask your permission when he go out? Don’t give him that control. Don’t let him alienate you from family & friends that usually means abuse. Will follow… hopefully not. Be careful

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Naw girl, you don’t need permission from anyone togo anywhere. You are you own person.
My family lives about an hour away also. I don’t ever ask togo but I will give my hubby a heads up like hey we heading out, we going to see the family.
Just because if something happens to the girls or the car he knows kinda of where we are at.
I’d just talk to him.

No you don’t! You have every right to see your family! This is showing red flags to me.

I mean, yeah, your spouse(/partner as it doesn’t only apply to marriages) deserves to know if you’re going somewhere, mostly just out of courtesy and 'cause, well, I’d hope they’d want to know so they can make sure you’re safe if you don’t come home or something. I know I always want to know where my husband goes, not out of a lack of trust, but because I care about him and want to make sure that, for example If he just went to the store to pick up something, and I don’t hear from him/see him for a couple hours, I can start trying to make sure he’s okay in case something bad happened. It’s good to know for safety, not for a lack of trust.

But… It sounds like there’s an issue here. You’re going to see family… Unless it’s happening every weekend and you two don’t spend any time together because of it, that shouldn’t be an issue…

My husband and I both would love to be able to be guaranteed to see our families even just once a year… You’re still close to yours. You’re still within a decent distance. You should definitely still be able to see them at least once a month if not more. I think you need to have a very serious conversation with him to find out why he has such an issue with this, and to work things out, because it’s absolutely unfair of him to keep you from family.

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Ask permission from your husband to visit your family?That’s like asking him if yo u can have a bowel movement

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I could understand asking if he weren’t getting mad when you go. I think asking before doing anything is respectful. Just like my SO asks before he does anything; we don’t have to, we just do.

But in this case, you do not need to ask him. He’s trying to control your every move seems like. You can do whatever you want!

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Let him know in advance that you’re going to go see your family next week end. Leave midmorning and return around suppertime when it’s still light. Ask him if he’d like to come along.If not go without.

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I can’t get my head around this post, I mean this has to be a joke aye, wheres the camera :joy: should we all smile for the camera cos this has to be one of those post where all our legs are being pulled :grinning_face_with_smiling_eyes: Lol

You don’t need your husband’s permission for any fucking thing. Period.

Hell no. It’s an hour away! You can go whenever you want if you have the funds for it. If my family was an hour away I would be going for lunch on random days :laughing: you should find a park or something tho thats in the middle and you guys can meet there weekly for the kids. I drive an hour just to go walk around ikea. I only clear dates with hubby to visit my own family bc he has to put in for vacation to go since its states away, but even if I ever wanted to go on the fly with just the kids he would never argue over it. He would support my need to see my mom. He is trying to control you.

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That’s VERY toxic behavior. You have every right to see your family. (Unless for safety concerns of course). This throws up some MAJOR red flags.

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My family lives just over hour away…
I tell him when I’m going…I don’t ask permission…
I’m not his employee…
As long as you are financially able to why not .if he doesn’t like it get his butt in the vehicle and come visit with you or stay home and pout…
Never should a woman have to ask for permission…

You should not have to ask permission, however you should let him know ahead of time you want to go see your family. Maybe make a deal with him for once a month such as the first Saturday of the month you will go visit your family.

Permission, NO common curtsey " this day I will be going to visit my family would you like to join me" would be fine… In my case my husband takes me to my family when ever I like he loves them as much as I do :two_hearts:

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Ummm no, you don’t need his permission

Wow! You should be able to visit your family whenever you want to. He sounds like he’s jealous of your family. Where’s his family? Do they live close by?

He isn’t your daddy you don’t need his permission to visit your family or to spend money. This is his way of manipulating you and controlling you. Go Visit your family and have a good time.

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You can tell him a few days ahead of time that you ARE going to visit your family.

Letting him know your plans is one thing but having to ask is ridiculous :roll_eyes:

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I wouldn’t ask his permission, but I always let him know that I have plans to go…sometimes he doesn’t like for me to go…but I usually go anyway…it’s not a question of do I need his permission. …it’s respecting him, so he respects me! He usually takes me cause he loves my family too!

No. This sounds like my old step dad. He pretty much hated when my mom was with my family(in the same town), always had to be there or he’d be mad even if he’s working. Your family will always be there till death, marriages can end. I would respectfully tell him ahead of time I’m going to see them but if he’s mad, who cares, turn off your phone and enjoy your kids with the grandparents!

It’s definitely a red flag. You should be able to walk out if the house without asking permission.

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Huge red flag to abusive, controlling behavior.

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Hr drive is what ? going to cost you 15 bucks depending on lol. why you asking lol

Major red flag! My ex was that way, extremely controlling and manipulative. And I only lived about 15-20 minutes away from my family. Don’t let him shut your family out of your life! :heart:

Take kids and go live with your family. Isolation is a red flag.

Please go visit your mom.

I lost my mom in March.

I didn’t see her often because my boyfriend couldn’t get along with her.

I would give anything just to hold her again.

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Are you over the age of 18? Do you have more than one vehicle? If you answered YES to both of these questions, you don’t need permission from him or anyone to go anywhere you want, any time you want. If you only have one vehicle, you may want to consult with him so that he is still able to get to and from work while you are gone.

Sounds like my ex…red flag this is controlling behavior that usually leads to abuse either mentally,physically or both. Mine was both. They first try to isolate you from your family and friends and then once that happens you rely solely on him and then that’s it. You are his toy do yo speak and if you don’t end it now it could get to that point.

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Key tip. If u need permission to see family or friends thats a red flag :triangular_flag_on_post:

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Out of respect. It’s always a good idea to say “hey,babe. I’m headed to my mom’s house on this day. Ill be back around whenever” but to ask permission. He ain’t your father, or your keeper. He’s your husband. It’s a red flag. In a major way. That’s a manipulation and control tactic. Girl. This is not ok. Everything about this post is concerning

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