Get therapy first. You need a professional diagnosis. As someone who got diagnosed as an adult, starting therapy early can help her in the long run with ways to calm her brain and give herself a break. ADHD isn’t a one size fits all. Not everyone needs medication, and therapy may not work for her. My therapist actually works with kids as well as adults. It’s not unusual for a child to need therapy.
Young one - is she in school? It sounds like she has behavioral problems due to frustration,anger, and/ or chemical imbalance. ADHD - depending on the “H” needs to be known to help you any more. One is genes and other is impulse .
Omg honey ,let me tell you ok when my kid was 3 he held the pre school teacher with a play doe knife hostage .ok no my kid wasn’t raised violent or to miss behave ok my son was a adhd kid and I kept ignoring it .thinking its just kid stuff until that any way social service steped in and of course I wasn’t going to be told I had to put my kid on a narcotic o way in hell .so I fought them clear upto the point where they showed up at my door with the police to take him. Then I said ok wait illagreeto get testing if you allow my drs to read it .they said ok
At that point I was holding on with everything I could to keep my.kid .litterly.here I thought I was being a good mom not putting him on a addictive narcotic. Especially with addiction in the family with other family members anyway. They did the text and sure everything seemed as though as he indeed had this adhd .but still I did not want him on medication that was a addictive. And I still wasn’t sure so I still fought them and got them to do a scan and the scan showed yes he was .my point is is that all the questions in the world can make you think its similar or possibly true. But mam get the 1000 percent FACT DONT JUST GO FOR WHAT LOOKS LIKE IT COULD BE .
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I have 2 that are adhd and needed meds because they couldn’t focus in school and had no impulse control we finally. Found a medication that works for both of them my 10 year old turned into a straight A student and my 8 year old is improving this year after starting her on the same meds as her sister! It’s still fairly new but it works it’s journay pm it’s given at night it’s a delayed release so it starts working by the time they wake up
They are able to focus but does not cause them to be zombies like other. Meds do they still have tons of energy but the focus is on point!
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My son is adhd I honestly tried meds it was horrible for MY SON I resorted to other things every sport there is he is in he has a cup of coffee in the morning before school not a lot of cream or sugar like for real but I also use lavender oil behind his ears and it helps calm him. If you want to do the meds girl try it the Dr will work with you to find what’s right for you baby. But if you don’t don’t let anyone force you into it not even the school there are so many other ways that do work for certain children
Now I am say again this worked for MY SON
My son was diagnosed with ADHD in grade 5. We finally decided to go the medication route after his grades were at failing level, he was always in trouble at home and at school and he had alienated all of his friends with his antics. One day to the next his life changed. We stayed on top of dosing and meds, changed as required and worked very closely with his pediatrician. He was on meds until he graduated high school. He is 23 now, unmedicated and a very successful estimator for a construction company. Meds arent a bad thing, and you will know if they work IMMEDIATELY. If on day 1 you dont see a difference, then try something else. And remember, if your child needed glasses you wouldnt even hesitate to get them would you? Same concept. GL. Its har, but so worth it.
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Make a doctor appt as soon as possible. I been trying for 2 years to get my son dignosed with ADHD he has every symptom but in my state they are very hesitatent to start any class 3 medications which I understand. They had us do a questioner and had the school fill one out and since my son didn’t score high enough at the school they wouldn’t touch him he’s in therapy… what helped me is joining groups on Facebook to talk with other parents experiences.
Get her into therapy first to rule out other conditions. As noted, ODD does not get better with meds. ADHD can be treated with meds, however, meds are a tool, not a magic bullet. That’s why it’s important to determine exactly what is going on. Behavior modification can help. We had 3 kids. Two with ADHD and one with ODD.
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So the coolest thing about a child being diagnosed with ADHD versus an adult, is that there’s many alternative ways to treat symptoms & behaviors. Seeing as it’s a cognitive disorder, there’s plenty of ways to lead them through the struggles. Medications for a child can cause many health issues in the long run… Not just with weight issues, but chemical imbalances in the brain that’ll cause a lot of issues in their adult life. Not just that, but heart murmurs, drug addictions etc.
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Get a professional diagnosis there is a non controlled option called strattera there is a generic for it I gave it to my son it helped him so much but I waited until 3 rd grade and we tried multiple different things.
I was worried about giving him medication but a friend of mine who is a teacher and also a mother of a son with ADHD asked me if my son had diabetes would I question giving him insulin. And of course I said no I wouldn’t question it she said ADHD is a medical condition like diabetes and they may need something extra to help them function properly treatment isn’t a one size fits all but there are better options out there now than just giving your kid a narcotic I would look into it and find out what works best for you and your child the Strattera that I gave my son is not a narcotic and worked great
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Both of my boys are ADHD and are medicated. With both of them there was a drastic improvement once they started their meds, som much so that teachers were commenting on it. I told the dr that I could deal with them at home but that it wasn’t fair to their classmates or their teachers to miss out on instruction time due to them acting out. My 16 yr old was diagnosed in pre k. It got to the point were he was throwing chairs and became a danger to himself and others. My youngest had some delays with speech and his hearing and behaviors due to those issues with expressing himself. He was kicked out of his first daycare because they didn’t know how to deal with him. We were able to get him into a title one school for 3 and 4 yr pre k and he has an IEP that he has been on since kindergarten. Make sure you look into what programs that your child may qualify for. Title one was a life savior for us it helped him with his issues and his behaviors got better. Good luck 
it gets better. Also my 16 yr old has had his dosage decreased as he’s gotten older and uses it to focus better in school. Also his pediatrician said that once he starts driving he needs to take it to focus on that also
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Cut back on sugar will help alot
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My kiddo is 7. He started medication for his ADHD at 6 and it’s made all the difference in the world. He’s focusing more in school and at home with home work and tasks around the house. It’s like he’s a whole new kid. They do have medication that isn’t a narcotic. I didn’t want to start my kiddo out on a “stimulant” if He didn’t need it and so far, it’s been awesome
Good for you momma trying all the things. From friends I know diet is a huge part of it also so maybe add that to the list to try! I know red dyes effect my friends kiddo in a major way. Just another idea. Meds aren’t always a bad thing whatever you decide is best
Speak to a child health nurse about being seen by an early behavioural intervention specialist and assessment to see what they say. I have one organised for my 2 year old as her physio suspects possible adhd but at this age it’s super diffulicult. But I whole heartedly understand how you feel. It has an impact on your own mental health trying to raise a child that you feel like is out of control and always overwhelmed, so please speak to them and express how hard it really is because alot of people won’t fully understand. Best of luck and I try and see it as them having their own extremely unique and extroverted personalities hahaha xx
Vyvance has really helped my 6 year old ask dr for it
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See a pediatrician for a referral
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I have a 7 year old with adhd diagnosed at 4 and is medicated! My son can not function correctly without his medication! He was already moved to a different school because the school he was at could not handle him. The kids kept calling him weird he got teased for being hyper. He could not stay still or do his work because his mind would race and he was go go go!
My grandson started on medicine at 5. He noticed a difference right away with himself. He said mom I feel so much better. His grades and behavior at school is so much better now.