Shes outside the fenceline of your control but you need to protect your 3 year old and never let them be alone together because if she doesnt hurt the child her poor judgement might turn them into a threenager
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Please say something
You need to tell. That sounds like a dangerous situation. People are really gross to be talking to someone that young.
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Iâd go straight to the grandma and take her phone to her. She is 11 and 1 she doesnât need a phone and 2 if your husband doesnât see that his little sister is in the wrong and donât want to protect her then he needs to go.
I would also report it to the police those older people should know better! They are probably older than they say! Sick fucks!
If your husband isnât saying anything about your guys 11 year old niece talking sexual to 15-17 year Olds thatâs a BIG read flagâŚ
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Say something, this is serious and concern about her well being. If I were that childâs guardian I would absolutely want to know
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Say something she is a child and should not be talking to 17 year olds. Seems like her grandmother needs to give her the talk and tell her the consequences of her actions to keep her safe. Also definitely keep her away from your child maybe something else is going on because thatâs not normal. As for your husband thatâs a red flag that he does not have a problem with your 11 year old niece talking to 17 year olds. He should know what goes through a 15/17 year old boys is not good.
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Why arnt you monitoring her phone? Do you realise how many kids are being abused and groomed online every day. It destroys lives.
There is an app called family link. You download it in yours and her devices. You can set bed times and control what she downloads.
I would start taking the phone off her every night to check itâs and be open about that. Sheâs a little girl who needs to be safe guarded.
I would talk to the child then the guardian. I mean her talking about beating up the 3 year old might of just been chat. I told my 8 yr old nephew he was gonna get duct taped to the wall⌠Realistically here heâs too big lol.
In all honesty you need to put stuff into place on that phone to protect her. You all need to monitor her phone better and protect her. There are alotta bad people out there who would harm get and she sounds so vulnerable
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Take that phone asap!! Flip phone it is!! Your husband it trippingâŚ
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Say something ! Why would he not be worried for her safety !!!
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You need to speak up before she a statistic. Before she actually does beat your 3yo. And if you husband would rather bury his head than protect the children in this situation then you need to really decide if this is who you want to be with.
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The sexting⌠do not let it go. Sheâs being groomed by someone
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You need to go talk!! This is not good at all! So dangerous! Step in!
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Snapchat is a way that sex traffickers find kids. How do you know that none of these people she is chatting with arenât just that?
Look into the Murders of Liberty German and Abigail Williams out of Delphi Indiana. They are now finding out that their murders may be linked to snap chat.
She is 11. You need to protect her from herself.
Oh. And. YOUR HUSBAND IS DUMB.
I suggest saying something⌠Never know with people these days⌠It all starts with talk, then they go missing and it hey progressively worse⌠I wouldnât want a child to go through anything that could result in a long lasting effect.
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Please say somethingâŚoneâŚyou need to protect your child but alsoâŚyou should protect her from predators. If something was to happen to either one of them, could you forgive yourself
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Definitely sounds like you need to talk to her legal guardian about parental control on her devices fersure
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Youâre the adult,you better tell that girl something before 
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Oh, absolutely be worried about that. She could get raped by an older man, kidnapped, etc. Also, keep her away from your child.
Wtf is wrong with your husband?! You need to tell.
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First off the texting her friend that she was mad at the 3 year old is completely normal at 11. When I was younger I would fight with my siblings and say I hated them, ect. Shes allowed to be angry that your 3 year old broke something of hers doesnât matter that it was an accident. Secondly talking to the older guys not okay at all. Definitely need rules about who she is allowed to speak to/text/facebook/snapchat/ect, and 
her guardian needs to know so you can all be on the same page for the rules and expectations of her phone. She needs consequences of not following the rules.
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Sheâs a little girl and does not need to be having adult conversations. Sheâs a child and needs to be protected. Your husband should want to protect her! Iâd be saying something to someone and she wouldnât have a phone for a long time. You and the hubby are already arguing over this, what more can happen? Youâll argue more? At least youâre standing up for her and wanting to help her. And for her saying she wants to beat your 3 yr old childâŚyou husband is okay with that? No wayâŚ
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Definitely needs to be addressed and throw that phone in the garage!
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Why had nobody talked to this child about internet safety and the dangers before giving her a phone? That is the first thing that needs doing. These âboysâ might be grown men for all anyone knows. People lie about their ages to groom kids. At the very least the guardian needs to know, realistically the police need to know. Your husband needs to give his head a wobble before this goes too far and someone gets hurt
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Ok the Snapchat sexual chats definitely need to be talked about . It could lead to so much more itâs a safety issue. The beating your 3 year old you could talk to her if you want but more then likely thatâs all talk.
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The aggression sheâs learning from the internet. A big deal. But less of a big deal than the sexual conversations sheâs having with almost legal adults. God forbid she starts sending nude pictures. Or have an older boy start taking physical sexual advantage of her. Iâd take her phone away all together. And figure out how to have a conversation with her that what she is doing could get her hurt, abducted, killed, etc. Not just âdo you understand why weâre taking your phoneâ convo. But she clearly isnât old enough to value her own safety. Yes. Tell her legal guardian.
Its gonna cause a big fight, but you need to say something hun.
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The only thing that doesnât concern me is the the threatening to beat your three year old. Honestly unless sheâs violent and mean towards the three year old normally I wouldnât worry about it it people even adults make idle threats like that all the time everything else yeah bring it up to her legal gaurdian
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Say something and punishment for the snapchat and sexual talk. Maybe talk to her About her saying she was gonna beat your 3 yr oldâŚas for your husband he needs to understand your helping raise his sister and should have a say to these types of things
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Speak to the grandma
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It is a big not necessarily the threat about your son which I understand but I think sheâs probably just blowing off steam. But Snapchat I garauntee at least one if not all of those guys are lying about their age and actual legal adults and pedophiles not just older teens. I also garauntee theyâve exchanged pictures too. Itâs disgustingly common. Yes they go to jail but thatâs probably only like 1% that are actually getting caught just from talking one on one to a child. You need to talk to her directly about the 3 year old but Snapchat needs to be a major family discussion first with adults only then her. Let her know you werenât snooping but just saw notifications
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Discuss it with her guardian. Sheâs a child. N as 4 wanting 2beat up a 3yr old. Maybe send her 2 her guardian if the person responsible 4 her upkeep. Let dem deal with her
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It definitely all needs to be addressed
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Take her phone for good
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Talk to the guardian because if anything happens to this child you will never forgive yourself for not saying anythingâŚAnd watch the 3yr. old carefully just incase she does try somethingâŚPraying all goes wellâŚ
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Havenât you heard of child sex trafficking⌠that the phone to her guardian before something bad happens
Speak to her like sheâs your daughter since sheâs 11. Grandma is either unaware or out of touch about electronics. The comment about beating my kid would have been enough for my husband to lose it add in the sex crap, OMGâŚhe would have lost his mind if it was his baby sister.
How does he not think her SEXUALLY talking to guys at 11 isnât a big deal?? Thatâs HUGE and she could seriously get hurt if she ever manages to actually meet up with themâŚ. Her saying what she said about the 3 year old may just be her letting off steam but the sexual stuff definitely needs to be told
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Talk to the school counselor and the grandma too and lock social media up quick
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Clearly u need to say something to her grandma what she is saying and doing is not okay thst girl needs a rude awakening
Also you talk to her .
Itâs a really big red flag 
your husbands says âlet it goââŚâŚ
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Speak up loudly and be heard she is 11⌠She could end up being trafficked or worse 
⌠Talk to her nana
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And tell them that this is how it all starts and next thing you know theyâre shooting in schools and bullying people that kill themselves 
as of a mama of up to eight kids, this is no laughing matter or something to brush off
Tell the grandma. And, there are online classes to guide you in keeping your children safe on social media. Watch the classes together with the grandma. Follow the advice and take the technical precautions advised on her phone. There are resources through your local police department to go to for advice. Ask for the community policing officer or the youth officer. Get the child into counseling immediately. Sheâs 11 and in way over her head and heading down the wrong path. She needs you to advocate for her because the rest of the family is obviously not equipped to handle this.
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I would call the police dept and turn in the names just in case they are known to be pedophiles using other names and lying to children to get to them. I know a lot of people say. It wonât happen to them but, 20 miles away from where I am homeland security just arrested a household if illegal men who are sex trafficking. They were sent to be taken back to Mexico. You never know.
Grandma needs to know everything. Even if they are just kids she knows. I canât imagine why a 10-11 yr old would know teens like that. They could even sneak into her window while GM is asleep.
Talk to her about physical abuse and anger. She needs to learn now how to cope with anger. It can become worse as she gets older. She definitely needs therapy.
I would be far more concerned about her texting of old boys , that is alarming and not at all what an 11 year old should be doing let alone know about . Kiss talk crap to their friends all the time trying to sound cool, unless she had hurt your son previously, I would not be too worried . About the other stuff, I would be more than worried
If she ends up going to meet up with one of these sick dudes, how are you gonna feel when something bad happens to her if you could have done something to stop it?
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Definitely address Snapchat I would bet those guys one if not all are older and probably serious pervs now they might not know she is 11 yo keep that in mind but still itâs wrong
Just tell Grandma about it so Grandma has a headâs up. Just in case the 11yro goes missing (could be one of those guys) also about the 3yro, watch the little one close around her and if 3yro ends up injured youâll know who did it
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protect that 3 yr old
First off wtf is wrong with your husband?! Absolutely tell her grandma.
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First take her phone. Then you and grandma need to sit down and have a conversation with her
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Oh Iâd tell it, sheâs 11âŚher grandma needs to know!!
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That girl needs to lose all access social media and be put counseling and watched like hawk sexual talk at 11 isnât ok and is a big deal so is saying she would harm a child
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I would talk to her first and if you feel you donât get through to her let grandma know as soon as possible so she can keep a eye on her and stay on top of it
11 wholey hecka. Take the whole phone away
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F*ck that shizz. This little psycho wants to beat your 3yo because of headphones. Protect your child.
Give grams a heads up about all this. Explain just how you did in the post
I had this exact same thing happen when my cousin was really young. I would definitely talk to her grandmother. Also Iâm just saying she could be lying about her age to these men. My little cousin did and we messaged them telling them she was only 14 and if they had any other contact with her that charges would be filed. Thatâs how we found out she was lying about her age.
Try talking to her yourself maybe and give her the talk about boys I know sheâs young but obviously sheâs curious so she needs to know about contraception too but yea Iâd take the phone away and think grandma should do so
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100% Talk to grandma. Secondly what the hell is with your hubby mate? Every dad I know with a daughter or sister would 100% be full on horrified at that behaviour, including the threat to 3 yo. Do not take your hubbyâs advice. I would be ringing the grandma immediately!. Then I would address the serious problem with your husband, and his lack of care that his little 11yo sister is doing what she is doing. Red flag.
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Tell nan then donât have her at your house ever.not your problem the only one you got to worry about is your 3year old .she only your in-law who donât give a crap about you and possibly never will.do what you can control her not coming to your house leave it to the nan to deal with.walk away not worth the hassle
- Iâd be telling grandma everything sheâs 11 its for her own safety and 2. Iâd also have a word with the 11yo that if she ever laid a finger on my 3yo itâd be the last thing she ever did.
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Would he say the same thing if it was his daughtersâŚ
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Sheâs 11 talking to boys like sheâs 21 of course you should be telling her guardian!
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Make sure her family arenât involved and putting her up to it- you need to safeguard her now you know - I know someone who appeared to be in a happy family but her grandfather rented her out to men from 11 ! I would talk to her
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Protect your baby (3 year old) and tell grandma
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Take pictures of the evidence for proof. She is bored and wants attention. She sounds spoiled already since she has no idea of responsibility. Since you know what is going on and do nothing to stop.it or change it to a positive direction, you are just as guilty. Tell her what she is doing can have many negative effects and why is she even talking sexually to older kids? Does she not realize she is setting herself and them up for charges that will affect their life later??
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Curfew, tracker, birth control, tell grandma, canât let her hurt your 3 year old, stay ahead of everything EARLY, so you wonât be the last to know things.
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Protect those kids. The three year old from her and the 11 year old from the older boys. Allowing the sexual behavior to go unnoticed especially at 11 with boys at that age is allowing her to stay in a dangerous situation. They could talk her into to possibly sneaking out and so on⌠TELL GRANDMA and have a sit down. Also, message them boys as her and tell them she is 11 they might not message back in the future if they know how young she is.
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Your husband should be worried thatâs his little sister talking to older creeps next thing itâll be them sending pictures or her sending them and then wurse if heâs not worried and doesnât find that a big deal he has some serious issues⌠Go to grandma she may just agree with you
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My parents grounded me for 2 months for behavior similar from my little sister and my parents thinking we were all doing it and I can tell you while it made me mad I also was glad my sister was safe from bad intentions⌠Only after social media was taken though did it stop
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Depending on how explicit the messages areâŚfor example if sheâs sending inappropriate photos TECHNICALLY she is a minor behaving criminally considering even if theyâre pictures of herself or other teens she is distributing minor p**nography. If you have knowledge of that and donât inform her guardian you have liability. So tell your husband itâs not up to him because you wonât put yourself in the way of legal trouble now that you canât unsee it.
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You absolutely tell her grandmother.
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Take the phone away till you get this straightened out.
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@ 16 we took my neices tablet bc of the same w messaging on Kik. Some guy sent her a video by the time I got the tablet to dig. I wouldnât send her back to where she clearly isnât being cared for. There was an issue thatâs why sheâs w you. Get her in a councilor NOW. TEACH her.And yep I would tell the grandma later. You are taking care of her not grandma so get her help then tell grandma and why.
Yep! Definitely tell her grandma. Why isnât your hubby more concerned that sheâs having sexual conversations with older boys/men? Iâd be mortified. Snapchat is so bad for it, especially child groomers etc.
Maybe talk to her calmly and explain that you saw a notification pop up and see if she opens up about anything but Iâd also explain to your husband, he needs to understand the severity of this situation. And definitely, definitely protect your baby, what she said about that 3 year old is disgusting.
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Say something, this kid is crying out for help.
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I would say something and notify law enforcement asap
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Iâm curious as to where this childâs mother is and what roll she may have in her life and why her grandmother has guardianship of her? Seems that this very young lady has been through some trauma in her young life and maybe just feels âlostâ at the moment and is seeking attention from anywhere she can get - if she is being placed back and forth between you and her gr.mother maybe she is feeling unwanted and is taking the flight or fight position in real fear of having no one at all - not sure what happened with the mom but it sounds like she may be having abandonment issues going on right now. Try to sit down with her and treat her like she thinks she is a young adult and let her know you are just wanting to talk, not argue, about some things that are going on before you take it to her grandmother - she may open up to you that way - good luck in whatever way you decide to handle this but personally I would be notifying those young teenage boys that they are talking to a very young underage little girl and that should put a stop to that part hopefully and maybe let them know that at the age of 17 if they were to do anything with her they would go to jail for it bc of her age - scare the heck out of them all or just tell them to google what could happen if caught.
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You have a duty of care towards her now that you know this, you canât just brush it under the rug. So many scary possibilities could come out of that!
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She is a baby
I would definitely say something!!!
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My 10 year old had Snapchat I went through it and she was crap messaging so I smashed her phone. Sheâs banned from technology.
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I would definitely say something. I know I would want to know. When and if you decide to give it back, get her an android phone, if she doesnât already have one, and download the mmguardian app. I monitor my childrenâs phones with it. I love it. It allows you to only let them view their age appropriate content. It can alert of you of cursing, drugs, bullying, inappropriate pictures, pornography, suicide talk/depression. What websites they go to⌠You can lock and unlock their phones, set time limits, block apps. You can set it up to see what apps are downloaded, and block what apps you donât want them to have. I love it. It is 7.99 a month, but well worth it!!!
Better say something now before itâs too late
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She is an 11 year old CHILD. For him to not get upset that she is speaking sexual with older people at 11 says what about him ??? I guess he wants an 11 year old already being sexual and is just fine lets blow it off. What happened to letting kids be just kids when they will be adults for the rest of their life . Wow just wow that he would not be upset his own 11 year old child of a sister is talking SEXUAL with older boys who are probably perv men . Take that phone away and she will have to earn her stuff . As for the beating I would address it also . Have the grandma hear every bit of it . Who pays the bills has the say so and you are a couple so he needs to be on board about his 11 year old sister child who needs to have some structure in her life and sexual talk on snapchat is not it . Wow just wow on him not being mad and just blow it off . Smh .
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It sounds like she may be suffering from side effects of sexual abuse. With all the things youâve said here id focus on getting her the help she desperately needs and protecting your child. Children dont just say these things, they either are being/have been sexually abused or are being actively groomed. Your husbands severe lack of concern is just
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You most definitely do something about it. It literally can safe her life. Not to mention you need to protect your child.
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I think its natural for you to be upset. There is alot going on here that would be hard to âjust let goâ. Let go of what? The fact she wants to beat a 3 yr old, the fact she has snap chat and should not, the fact she is barely 11 and having age inappropriate conversations with older guys. There is so much wrong with all of that. You have to decide what is best for your family. But if it were mine, I wouldnât just âlet it goâ. These are very teachable momemts
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Thereâs no way she would spend another night
No. Do not embarrass her like that. Anything sexual you have a sit down between the two of you and leave it at that. Would you like your conversations being leaked like that to other family members? Your grandmother? There are some conversations we donât need to hear as adults. What you deem inappropriate is something she might not even understand. Her saying she will punch your child is her letting off steam. Talk to her or in a calm understanding manner or leave it alone.
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Sheâs being sexually abused. Weird that your husband is ok with thatâŚ.
Yes. Do something. Get help and advice from a charity, police and /or school on how to approach this. The police could do with knowing who these people are.
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Say something!!! I have an 11 yo niece and I know damn well if she was doing that my sister would lose it. Sad itâs getting younger and younger now a days plus you donât know if these kids are actually kids or not that sheâs talking to
No it needs addressing and 11 year old is a child and sexually vulunerable âŚplease dont leave it, some of these lads on snapchat could be men and sexual predators
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Ok my thoughts is why is your husband ok with that.
Red flags has been huge here lately (as it should have been all along)
She is talking to men that could be a father to her & he doesnât feel itâs a big dealâŚ
Remove Your Child.
Remove Her,
Remove Yourself!
This girl needs help & she is not able to get it in a home where she is told this is ok or worse, she needs counseling.
She is such a young girl & to feel this way.
Sheâs not upset about water spilling, she is upset about behavior that has been allowed to happen but she didnât know how to tell anyone about most likely even with your husband & before you come out & say he isnât like thatâŚ
He is ok with full grown men talking to her sexually & snapchat isnât conversations only.
Pay attention to your surroundings including your husband & maybe get on his phone here & there (they say thatâs a way to break a relationship but his carelessness feels like a reason to find out if your crazy or not)
Please see the bigger picture here that this is 100% a little girl not knowing how to handle your emotions.
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Address It Because If Something Happens To That Child Yall Gonna Get In Trouble Not Her!
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I think some people missed the part when she said the Grandmother is the childâs legal Guardian. In that case she should definitely be notified. If this lady did not say anything to anyone else, but then they found out later on that the sexual talk spawned from that the little girl being sexually abused, does anyone know how much crap that would start? If CPS got involved, not having told anyone prior would make this lady look guilty even though she isnât.
It is never smart to hide anything from the legal Guardian/parent.
She is 11, she is not an adult. The fact that the husband is okay with letting it go, is very strange⌠this child has obviously gone through some things in life and ignoring that thereâs problems, is not going to help her.
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I would say something to her not grandma
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If she in Your House/ Family Home⌠Hell Yes!! Sounds like your hubby thinks itâs ok for an 11yr old to be talking dirty with older boys?? Say to be your hubby what if it was Your own Daughter/Child? Good luck
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Her grandmother needs to know that she is on snapchat! She might be helped with some therapy because wanting to hurt a toddler is not ok, healthy or normal!!