Do you get annoyed when your husband plays video games?

does anyone else feel extremely annoyed when their husband plays video games? my husband will come home from work and just play video games. we have toddlers and he will never pause his game to help. i feel very annoyed and it honestly makes me not attracted to him.

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Do you get annoyed when your husband plays video games?

That ended my first marriage.

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Nip it in the bud now. Explain you need help.

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I don’t get annoyed at all but mine helps out around the house just as much as I do. So it doesn’t bother me.

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My husband plays video games but always helps! Constantly asking if I need something and I know if I ask for his help, he won’t hesitate. Definitely talk to him and explain that you don’t mind him playing but he still needs to help with everyday life💜

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I don’t only because mine handles his duties before. Once everyone lays down for the night etc he’ll get on them

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Just got out of a relationship like that… now I ain’t around and he can’t use his ps5 or his 4k TV … bummer deal being the better parent there bro. :v: his clothes aren’t folded… dishes don’t get done… :upside_down_face: maybe ya should go play some Sims so you know how to do some of this stuff lmao

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Yes. Video games happen after kids go to bed. Otherwise during awake hours it’s fam time…whatever it be needs or something special.

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My girlfriend loves playing video games. I’d much rather that than out at the bar all the time. But house duty’s still get done. :blush:

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Question, did he play video games before you got married and have toddlers? If the answer is yes how can you now not be attracted to him? Ask him to help before jumping on the game or whatever.

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Mine plays video games… usually while I’m watching my shows next to him in bed on my iPad

Some games can’t be paused……

We are huge gamers in my house. Even our kid plays. We are always gaming together. So, no.

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My fiance loves his ps4 but he does not touch until the kids are in bed. Talk to him if he doesn’t change :v::v:

Throw it all away lmao

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They need to grow up

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Teach your toddlers how to turn off the game button when dad don’t wanna help . Then he will see the only good time to play is when they sleep lol …

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I love playing the game with my husband… we have a 5 year old and 10 year old… we make it work.

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My husband helps and gets one of the kids to bed every night. We hang out for an hour ish and then he plays or comes to bed with me. I usually watch my shows in peace if he plays. Lol. Or we watch something together. I enjoy the alone time sometimes so it works for us. :slightly_smiling_face:

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Have you asked him to help?
Also some people need to decompress to get out of the work version of themselves and into home mode. You should communicate your needs and work to compromise with his.

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Play with him and the babies

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Be glad he’s playing his games and not you lol

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Or the TV I think my hubby is starting to get it it tho

Hide his games,cords, system… as he helps with house chores give him pieces of it back… he keeps helping you in order to get all parts back…

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Sometimes yes but most times no. He needs an out too , dads need a break. I’d rather him play video games then go to a bar and drink or just be gone and away. He is helpful when and if I need it and doesn’t hesitate. You just gotta sit down and ask him to maybe spend a little time with his family first and help you if you need it. He should understand.

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Nope because I game right along with him. That’s how we met… playing call of duty and still going strong. And we watch football together :heart:.

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Well he could be out cheating and doing drugs ? Be thankful he’s home :heart:

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I met my boyfriend on a video game we both enjoy. My brother and female cousin got me into the game since I had full custody of my kids and needed to relax. Maybe it might sound hard to find what he’s doing interesting but if you both get chores done and play together it might help. You got together because you both had interest and some games might be fun for you.

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Need to make a time limit or time window.

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Did he do all this before yall had kids? If so u knew what u were getting yourself into lol but talk to him about it why don’t y’all come up with a schedule make sure he helps u with whatever u need before he hops on the game

There’s a difference between a man that plays video games and a “gamer.” Sounds like he hasn’t grown out of the gamer stage.

My daughter had that problem with her sons’ father. He had computer games. At the time, he was addicted to FarmVille. He would come home from work, walk in the door, past his son directly to the computer and load up the game. He didn’t say hello-kiss my foot-go to the devil, nothing. His little baby boy would lift his little arms to be picked up and his father wouldn’t even notice. My daughter would have to pick her son up and put him in his father’s lap for him to even notice he was in the world. It ended their marriage.

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Mine doesn’t play video games he talks and plays on his phone from the time he gets home till he goes to bed. It’s an addiction, hard to break unless the user admits they have a problem.

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Yeah I’d be upset. My husband waits to get on his games until after our son goes to bed. He needs to be present in his childrens lives and yours.

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Talk to him about needing more help while the kids are up. But honestly it’s not much different than him watching tv or being on his phone not helping. Tackle the actual problem (him not helping) not video games :joy:

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Real men don’t have time to play videogames there working form sun up till sun down supporting there family

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Why did you have children with a manchild?

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If you’ve asked him to help and he still won’t (and you shouldn’t always have to ask him - you’re not his mother) then I’d tell him counseling or see ya. That’s no partnership. And just because he’s not cheating doesn’t mean you should fall at his feet in gratitude for eating and sleeping there. It’s not 1950.

I play games with my man so it never really bothers me lol.

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Mine plays occasionally and my kids and I all love to watch him. It’s a complete non issue in our relationship. He’s entitled to his free time and what he chooses to do with it, as am I.

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It just depends. Is that all he does? My husband plays video games and I don’t mind because that’s my time. But yeah if that’s all he did and neglected the kids or me yes it would become an issue.

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I feel you but atleast he’s home with you. It is annoying that he doesn’t help with the kids tho. I don’t know about not being attracted to him because of it. Does he help with bills ?? Does he do anything else for you ?

Thank goodness my husband has no interest in video games. We played outside, instead of on video games.

Y’all excusing the games without even addressing the fact that he’s not doing anything to help his wife or making an effort to spend time with his kids. THAT is a very real problem.

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Playing a game here and there is one thing. But when they pass up their kids and go straight to the game and doesn’t help in raising them that’s not good. They need to be present in their kids lives and in your marriage / relationship

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You didn’t discuss his game playing before toddlers? I’m sure he didn’t just start playing games. LoL

If you’re raising the kids alone… you might as well be alone with them. Give him an ultimatum. Either start helping you with the kids or go!

There will be a day where is either this or your sanity.
It broke me down to the core to where I was literally going insane, he was ADDICTED and I was pregnant with my first and only baby.

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No way I could deal with that. Gaming is fine but when it causes issues it needs to be addressed. Any grown man who would rather spend his time (and I mean when he walks in till bed) on a game isn’t a Dad or a family man period. And the same goes for phones. Nothing good comes from it! Children miss out and so do the parents.

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I’d talk to him about it. The gaming isn’t the issue. Its the part where he isn’t helping out. My man is a gamer and so am I. We usually game when the kids are asleep

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Im usually the one playing lol he works 3-11 everyday i get up with my boys I feed em change em and get em playing and then i get what i need to get done (or hang out and play video games or play with the boys with hubby if im all cought up) i walk him out around 2:40 to go to work feed my boys lunch and lay them down for naptime I sign on my game and check everything play a little bit my noys get up we play i make dinner they play bath snack and back to bed. Finish anything else that needs done game somemore until uts time to great hunny then he joins me after he eats his dinner for a few hours and we go to bed

Yes, it’s annoying. Sadly men don’t get what needs to be done, you need to tell them. Some will still refuse. Maybe tell him how he can help. I grew up with a dad who was very hands on. He was a baseball coach, he cooked dinner, he shopped for our food. You know I was alarmed that all men weren’t like my dad. I get men are tired after work, but so are women after taking care of kids. But, my opinion is nothing more attractive man than taking care of his kids. When my husband helps I feel more closer to him. Idk goes both ways… talk with him see what works for your family.

Mine helps, but I never get annoyed. I’m gaming myself lol.

Video games are fine.

Some husband’s come home and drink away their work stress.

Have you tried talking to him about your feelings?

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No. My husband works very hard to support us. In 100 plus degree days on hot roofs. He deserves to be able to play his games. But he also lets me rest too. Since I work too.

We’re all gamers in my family so no it doesn’t bother me but if that’s all he’s doing and not taking on any other parenting responsibilities, that’s a big red flag.

Nope, I play games with him and his friends!!

Wouldn’t know. We don’t really do the geek computer thing here. We are music geeks. My hubby will get out his bass or guitars, set my daughter up on the drum kit and get them to join in making noise and I love it. The kids do too

My solution: Play them too. That way when I was on it, I’d tell him the same shit he told me.
Hold on.
I’ll do it in a minute.
So then he started getting upset. I said how does it feel!!!

Hide the controllers just tell him the kids must of took them

I can’t stand it. I broke up with a guy because he literally played all day every day. After work be came in and played until he went to sleep. Played all day when he was off. Irritating

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Mine doesn’t play them we don’t even own a video console

I hate them, and I totally understand losing attraction, hard not to lose attraction after being ignored for a game

At least it’s video games n not s%&%x por$%$ sites looking for local hook ups… just saying

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Video games are fine in moderation… they need time to decompress too and need time for self care too and that’s their time and what they consider self care but he needs to help out before he checks out

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Did he before or a new habit. Bc if before you knew what you were marrying I’m sorry.

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Depends on the extreme of playing… my bf used to play but now we are to exhausted since our 3rd kid :rofl::rofl::rofl:

Nope that doesn’t bother me at all, as I’m a gamer as well. However, if I had a child I would still expect him to pause the game to help with said child, and he would definitely expect me to pause too.

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If a grown man can’t put his family first or cannot comprehend the order of his priorities he is immature and should not have use of household finances. Apparently he doesn’t need to be in charge of the bank account. I would definitely inform him until he grows up and becomes an active participating family member he is CUT OFF. He would also be Cut Out of my BED. You can raise them alone. Why have more. Therefore STAY AWAY. tell him to sell it or donate it because your calling a lawyer otherwise. Tell him … You need a Real Man in your life. He is still a little boy.

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If he was playing games and ignoring all of us yes. But he is quick to pause it or walk away if any of us need anything. The kids love watching him play though and I lay down beside him at night while he plays and we talk and stuff. So I truly can’t complain about him…but I’ve had ex’s that were bad.

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He’s as much a kid as those toddlers.

Yes. It’s annoying. I’ve got to where I don’t even say anything anymore. Atleast not like I used to. I get tired of feeling like a single parent because he’s sitting in front of a screen with a headset on.

Playing games is fine. Only playing, while ignoring all responsibilities, and thus basically forcing you to do all the parenting/housework, is not.

You’re not mad about the games. You’re mad about him being irresponsible.

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Yes it DRIVES ME CRAZYYYY

No not at all it’s a stress release .his been working hard all day ,stressing so no I don’t care ,you have to let them have their time as well. Mine isn’t on it every day or for hours but it’s his winding down thing .but you need to talk to him if his ignoring the kids and yourself.

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Mine doesn’t play video games so idk but I’d probably be mad lol

That doesn’t sound like a video game issue. It’s sounds like a “him trying to disassociate from his life and responsibilities issue.”

I don’t mind video games. But #1 our kids are older (5&10) and he doesn’t ignore us for a game… if it’s an “intense match” he might need a few minutes or something til it’s done though lol But he still helps. He even streams his games and has made money doing that :woman_shrugging: It doesn’t bother me because most of the time it’s later in evening/after kids bedtime so I can play on my phone or watch something he wouldn’t want to watch with me and just relax while he plays the game :woman_shrugging: even when he plays games during the day (like when I’m working) he still takes care of kids and does some light housework.

So like I said it sounds more like he’s trying to escape. Or very stressed possibly. Or just an immature ass ?

My husband plays video games Monday 7-10 pm and Wednesday 7-10 with his friends. I go to my friends on Wednesdays. It’s fair I think so it doesn’t bother me at all and we made it so I can watch TV and play video games too.

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I would have it in the bin if that was the case. Time he was a father and man and not a child anymore.

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Mine plays almost anytime he isnt working lol. I dont mind because he doesnt let it get in the way like he will still help if i ask or if i wanna hang out he will shut it off. But after work and doing house stuff and kids i like having me time so im totally ok with him playing. Plus he has a game tv in our room so i can still lay amd watch tv while he plays. Also he plays fortnite and so does my daughter so i get to occupy them both at the same time lol

My friend and her husband have talked about that issue and her husband plays hid game every Friday night, while everyone else in the house does their own thing. Maybe something like that can be done. Or an hour a day. Just examples.

Nope I actually like to sit and watch that way we can still be together and he can relax and play his game

I used to yes, when all he did was play games at home, and ignored me and the kids and didn’t help with any household chores. It’s like raising an extra child.

Hide the games and controllers. Once he helps you, he can “earn” a game

I would get annoyed when all my husband did was go to work and play video games nothing else but after I told him do u want the game or family. Now he will only play it every once and awhile. When he was doing this we had a 3year old and a new born. I was cleaning and cooking taking care of 2 kids baths, diapers, night time and everything else. While working same hours as him.

You and he need to talk.

Negotiate his game time.

The kids need his attention and you do, too.

Maybe an hour when he first comes home to unwind or after the kids are fed, bathed, and put to bed.

Communicate your feelings in a non-confrontational way.

Pick a quiet time when you’re both relaxed and calm.

Don’t let it turn into an argument.

Talk it out.

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No I don’t because I play video games to and so does my kids. My fiancé works from 130pm to 10pm or later he plays when I work on a diamond painting picture. I only play at night sometimes during the day with my kids.

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My husband plays video games after work and sometimes on the weekends and no, I don’t mind.

Oh my gosh I’m sorry :woozy_face::woozy_face::woozy_face: it would really bug me as well. We don’t have them in our house, he’s never played and doesn’t want to but this is the entire reason we won’t get them for our kids. You deserve to have your partner supporting and there for you when he gets home. I’m not saying everyone doesn’t need to decompress, unwind etc but when it comes at the expense of the children and you then it needs to be re-evaluated.

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Thank God I married a smart man who loves playing with our kids and in his free time he reads and makes Art and science experiments with our kids. No video games in our house…
But yeah, I think it would definitely bother me if my husband would come from work straight to play video games and not participate in the family life…

have you actually addressed it with him? I hate to say it but men are clueless and not generally as aware as we are(im not saying there aren’t exceptions in either parent role) my fiance and I both had a long day and needed showers. I let him go first and I put our youngest in the bath. I came out to check and he was doing bills. I decided to not say anything. then I came out again and he was on the couch eating dessert. I had to say that I’d like to take a shower to. I decided not to say how much it bothered me til the next day when I could say it without crying.

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Not really cause I play games too. I mainly get mad when he pitches his fits while playing the games.

I prefer mine to have lay his games. At least then I know he’s not getting into trouble and he’s not getting in my way. My kids are older now but honestly it’s nice and was nice even when the kids were little bc then he was so worried about what they’re doing or how they were playing. If he was preoccupied with the games he was less likely to have a problem with anything my kids were doing. His mom was very strict and if him or his siblings just looked the wrong way they were beat with a wooden paddle. He would never do that but he can be quite strict an yell a lot and punish them in ways that don’t ever fit the crime. So if he is happy playing videos he’s less likely to be bothered by anything else. Keeps him out of my hair so I can cook an clean and do laundry bc if he helps well I have to go an do it behind him bc he sucks at it. I don’t think he knows how to use the washer or dryer either so best he not touch my machines

OK. Men use gaming as an escape from reality and stress and anything else they may have going on mentally. I’d have a conversation about how he is coping mentally and maybe seek some help for him. My husband is the same and has recently been diagnosed with chronic depression, anxiety and a whole range of mental health issues. I look at him gaming now and see it in a whole different light, when he’s gaming he’s releasing his stress and I couldn’t be more proud of him finding a way to release it instead of building it up :woman_shrugging:

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I personally don’t deal with video games. My bf isn’t into them and I wouldn’t date someone who is. I mean if you play once in a while with your kids thats a little different.

My husband used to play video games but never ever until after the kids were in bed

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Nope I actually sit and watch the game. Our time together and we talk

I did years ago but that changed as in after a long day at work that’s his escape from reality and I’m totally fine with it now . He does help if I ask tho . Maybe talk to him about it ? Communication is key .

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Normally no I don’t mind. I use to but not anymore. It’s annoying when it’s hours and hours at a time but I realize he does a lot for me and our family so if he wants to play I don’t mind