Any person they dated fine, but the one they cheated on me with?! Tf?! A homewrecker is a homewrecker
I wouldn’t want my child around a homewrecker, that’s basically saying like, “this is who I cheated on your mom with, but me and her are together so it’s okay that I cheated on your mom.”
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She’s not keeping him from the father sounds like she will let the father have parenting time as long as the homewrecker aka gf isn’t there.
And if his girlfriend cared about him she’d leave the man alone for the weekend so he could have his son
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First, I’m really really sorry😢 He’s a freaking douche canoe!
Your feelings aren’t wrong but keeping him away would be. Grown up problems should never involve the kiddos. This is your own issue! Work through it, brush it off and keep it moving.
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Yes it’s wrong. You are being unreasonable and bitter. Don’t get me wrong, I would probably be bitter too in this situation but you have to do what’s right for your son. As long as your ex is a good dad and you know your child would be in good hands with him, I say let him go. 
You have to find a way to let go of this anger because in the long run, it’s going to have a negative impact on your son. Just look at it this way, 9/10 he’s going to cheat on her too. The way she got him is the way she will lose him. Just move on with your life and be happy.
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Is there more to this then her just being the other woman? Cause of not. You don’t get to decide who your son is around especially when she hasn’t done anyone wrong but you.
You are bitter yes, it’s understandable, very, but you can’t dictate who he sees and if you want him to still see your child, and you’ve accepted his other relationships, I’m afraid you’re going to have to suck it up and accept this one. You don’t have to see her, speak to her or be mates, but past us past. She was his decision, he is responsible for bringing her into your life a couple of years ago, not her. As long as she takes care of, cares for, keeps safe and makes your child happy and have fun, you need to be pleased your son may like her. But your son doesn’t need to know who she is in relation to circumstance. That is confusing and not his concern. He knows her in the here and now as daddies gf and that’s how it stays
My ex cheated on me left me for another girl when my daughter was two years old. I was really pissed and I didn’t want that chick around my daughter but I knew that that was unreasonable for me to feel that way. I wasn’t it going to have my daughter suffer over some crap that happened with her father. So I understand the way you’re feeling but it would not be reasonable for you to keep a child from the father just because of the girlfriend that he has now.
I feel where you’re coming from. At the end of the day it’s about your son and his relationship he has with his dad . Don’t let your feelings get in the way. I totally get it. I’d feel some type of way because of your situation but it is what it is when you say she’s a mother now, does she have a kid with ur bd too?
If you look at it as if the situation was reversed would you like him saying whom your child can be around or with you during you parenting time?
I would try to find common ground to make it work and have a good co parenting relationship.
Coming from someone who’s parents could never get along or be in the same room with one another—try and try again for your child.
What is wrong with her personally? Meaning setting aside the cheating part? Because emotionally you haven’t let go of that resentment therefore you can’t stand her. It’s not bitter but sounds like you strongly dislike her for what “she did” to you rather than the way she treats your little boy
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Is there a reason you don’t want her around beside he cheated on you with her? I think you may have to come to terms with him having say over his time with him. With him getting older I would recommend coming to a mutual agreement for visitation. Having set days would make it easier for I think you but also your son in the long run.
You need to beat her ass … 
I understand how you’re feeling, and it’s not easy, but I would let him go.
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No one should be bringing anyone around their children unless they are planning to stick around. Your feelings aside, it’s about the nurturing and safety of the child. Neither of you should be bringing people in and out of your son’s life like that.
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I totally get it. But sadly legally you have no say who he has around him.
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Everything happens for a reason. You arent suppose to be with dude. Maybe she did you a favor. Think about the baby. If you think shes okay being around your son besides your issue then let it happen and just be the adult and take your opportunity to heal yourself and move on. Forgive for yourself. Being mad takes too much energy. And these babies deserve all the love they can get
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You do not get to decide what happens at dad’s. You are 100% wrong. Stop making it about you. This is alienation and is child abuse
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How many other women has your child been around and he’s only 2?? This is unhealthy for a child to be having people in and out of his life during a such crucial bonding age. My divorce judge made it clear in paperwork that my son wasn’t to be around any significant other before the parent dating for 6 months first. My son was 15 months when I filed due to drugs and cheating.
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Unless she is a threat to your son, you are letting your emotions cloud your judgement. You’ve let other around him. Yeah it’s gonna hurt you. But it’s not really about your feelings.
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Get over it. No judge is going to tell a man he can’t have someone around the baby unless she was dangerous. Just because he cheated on you amd now is with hr thats like me telling my now ex husband while we were still married that my kids can’t go to him or see their sister that was born during our marriage because hes a cheater. Yeah ive been there. You just gotta let it go. I was married almost 10yrs to him. They had a baby during our marriage. Oh and she was my best friend/watched my kids from time to time all that stuff.
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Tbh if she really has changed or whatever😒 she should very much understand where Youre coming from and or try to talk to you or work it out- something hell even apologize for her wrongs while taking responsibility for her actions- i.e earn that shiiii earn your trust, make sure she and your bd is really even serious about being together. Your bd should understand too especially if you’ve had no problem with him having other gf around your child- that its not from bitterness but its the principal of the matter. However you shouldnt keep the bby from him, talk to him without getting worked up or yelling and express how your feeling and let him express why he wants him around her to what avail? What will come of him and the side piece? Than end it off with can we try to come to an understanding until we get thru this, i still want you to be with our bby as you should with peace in mind.
I say that cause ive heard of sides who break up homes and their mean to the kids when the dad isnt around to get to them bm like ahaha nana -im not saying she islike that im js it happens. And theres just no way she didnt knw he had a bm AND bby otw with all the social medias these days lol im going thru likes n comments and finding out the whos the ex, bm if he got a girl, who they live w hell the dogs name too easy af 
cant tell me she didnt either
If she’s unsafe around him then no you should stand your ground but if its simply because you see her as “the one who broke us up” then yes you’re being bitter. Let her be with a cheat, eventually you will find someone else that would never cheat and you will have the better man in the end! You can’t stop who he goes out with and only stop the contact if the person is unsafe and you have proof they are.
Although you don’t have a say sounds like he changes gfs a lot if you say you havent had an issue with other gfs and he’s only 2. Maybe you guys need to sit down and talk about not bringing every flavor of the week around your son.
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Yes you are being bitter! You can not choose who he is with nor can you choose the relationship your child has with his significant other. I am a bio mom and a step mom so I’ve been in both sides and know how it is. But the only reason it’s reasonable to to be upset about the person he is around is if his physical or emotional well being is being affected directly!
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Unfortunately you dont have a choice unless shes a danger to your child
Sounds bitter. You can’t control what your ex does or who he really has around his kids also at the end of the day.
I get it I do . My ex left me when I was pregnant with our third child and I’ve had to watch her be with my children every second weekend for the past year while i dislike her for what she’s help do to the family I also thank her for taking the trash with her . She’s nice to my kids and if she ever wasn’t I’d know about it and that would be the reason I stop her from seeing them . Otherwise there isn’t a thing I can do about it
Completely agree with your decision im the EXACT same with my daughter, I will not allow my daughter around the women he cheated on me with for 1. He can’t keep a girl to save himself so I don’t want women being ripped out of her life and 2. I want people in her life who are going to be a positive role model for my child, if they can ruin a family and get with a man who has a partner/child, it is not someone who i want as a role for my daughter. Stand your ground, if this women can disrespect you as a person why should she be welcomed into your child’s life?! Its not being bitter, its not allowing people who are disrespectful and harmful to you in your sons life, how your children see people treat you is how they will treat others.
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Actually with no court ordered visitation or custody agreement you don’t have to allow him to go. Let him hire a lawyer and get parenting time. Because yes a judge certainly will take into consideration your son’s age, it being his formative years and clearly his dad has instability etc. with constant new gf etc.
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I have a similar story. Me and my baby’s father broke up and he was talking with his ex girl friend…. Now mind you this ex was his sisters friend from high school and he ended up dating her briefly as an adult. Fast forward to when we were together I had to accept her being around here and there and even kind of enjoyed her company… then we split up after 3 years and I started to date when I found out he was with said girl. I had no control and literally begged him to keep our daughter away from her. My daughter would come home telling me daddy kissed her, daddy said he loved her ect.
I’m not going to lie it fucking broke me. This is
The same girl that he promised me he’d never date. After they were together again briefly they broke up but I had found someone I was happy with…. Eventually things went for a turn after my ex got into a traumatic accident and we broke up. I had to see an ugly side to him and my baby dad wanted me back after I moved on.
Moral of the story. Move on, be unapologetically happy with your life. Do you SO GOOD YOU RADIATE SUNSHINE
Trust me it will make you feel good and you won’t even care about it any more. I promise. Part of your healing is him being with someone you don’t want him to, it helps you move on.
Besides you wouldn’t want his trash ass back anyways right. Let her be cheated on! She just took the trash out for you babe 
So far the only reason you listed was because she was the one he cheated on you with. I really really understand how hard that is, and how hard.it can be to let it go but so long as she’s not awful around your child or in general there’s no reason.
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You have every right to tell Baby’s Dad that until he is in a stable relationship of more than six months he cannot have Baby in his care.
He can see Baby at yours, or somewhere designated by you.
Do you have free legal aid, in your area? Take advantage of it, to get clarification.
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Unless there is some safety concern you really don’t have a say, you can’t dictate who he brings around on his time. Do you not trust him to take care of your guys son when he has him? But technically at this point because there is no court order you can keep him from going but that might not look good in court. But he could also keep him when he gets him again if he chooses. You could try to go to court and get a judge to agree that neither of you can bring any new significant others around for a certain period of time. If the judge will even agree to it and then once that period is up there is nothing you can do.
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It might really hurt but would it be worth a meet and a chat before this all goes ahead, just make your feelings clear and worries? If she is a mum now she will understand.
My only opinion on this is set an amount of time someone must be in your exes life before he introduces them to your child. I mean your child is 2, you broke up shortly after he was born and you’ve let all dad’s other girlfriends meet him? How many, none of them could be serious. And if this girlfriend of his is long lasting and serious you don’t get a say. You can’t dictate who your ex dates and you can’t forbid contact as long as she’s around, you share a child but that doesn’t give you control of his life, and if your only reason to hate her is because he slept with her when you were pregnant, it’s pretty pathetic. To start with she wasn’t the one committed to you so maybe your hate is pointed the wrong way? Maybe she didn’t even know about you? He’s the bad guy, he hurt you, just because she was the side chick doesn’t mean she was being it intentionally, you don’t know what he told her about anything, if you were mentioned, if you were abusive, if he had already left you. Stop judging by something that happened in the past and give her a chance. Again she was never the one in the wrong really, he’s the only one who made a commitment to you.
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He should be able to see his father and unless this woman’ is abusive, on drugs or unhealthy for your child to be around , then you can not let what your ex did to you determine if he see his child. She was not the one in a relationship
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Have you met her she might be really nice and good to your son
At least he’s had the decency to tell you she’s going to be there. I’m in the exact same position as you except it was way more recent. But if you stop your son seeing his dad your only hurting him for your own satisfaction to hurt your ex. What’s more important like your getting one over on him cause of some lass or your son having a relationship with his dad who clearly loves him abs wants to see him.
He has just as much right to your child as you do.And he has the say so of who he brings around your child when he has the baby.I get where you are coming from but you still dont have the right to not allow your ex to have his child because you dont like the gf.
She’s a mother now? Is that HIS baby bc technically that means they’re siblings and not sure how long ‘this feeling of yours’ will and can last.
Ijs.
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Answer to your 3 questions… yes, yes & yes…
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Your not being bitter, you only want what is best for your son, but unfortunately, while the child is in the care of the father, you have no say who the child can and can’t be around, unless there is a court order in place, or you have evidence that she is abusive or what not your child can be around her. If it is just because she is the one he cheated with, unfortunately it isn’t enough to stop the child being around them.
I’m in the same situation with my ex. We had an agreement that anyone either of us dated had to be around for 6 months before they met me, then met the kids. He hasn’t listened the past 2 times and introduced them the SAME WEEK they started dating. No matter what you say he’ll do what he wants, even if he lies to you about it. Not sure what you or I could even do to make it to where the kids aren’t around the new girl other than keep them away from their dad and that only hurts the kid in the end of it.
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Unless there’s a court order, you have no say in who he brings around the child.
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Trust your gut. If it was me Id want to meet her.
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If the child is two and the daddy has already had several other girlfriends around him, can dad not spend time with the child without having to have another female present? Lol
He don’t have to introduce the child to his pick of the week, cause I’m sure next week it’ll be another one. Moms/Dads wanna take the child around 100 different partners then when the other parent has something to say about it everyone wants to label them as being bitter. You CAN have a concern about something that has to do with your child or your feelings toward whom ever the other parent is having the child around without being a bitter baby mama/daddy! Ya know?
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Yes, you sound unreasonable and bitter. It’s been 2 years, let it go. If he keeps your child safe, there is no reason he shouldn’t see his son.
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Sorry unless that person is a danger to the child then you have no say. What happened between you two parents has noithing to do with his parenting skills
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It is wrong. I understand why you feel the way you do, I’ve been there. But in time I realized I’m not allowed to stop that, no matter how valid my feelings are.
Your feelings are valid, but it doesn’t make the action of withholding your son when she’s around right.
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Bitter. It’s not about you, it’s about your son
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That’s tough, I complete understand why you’re uncomfortable. I’ve been in your shoes. My 1st child’s father cheated shortly after he was born. We split, and then our sons 1st thanksgiving he spent the morning with me and my family and the afternoon with his dads family and the girl he cheated on me with. He dated her for some time, she was extremely rude to me and controlling with my ex. Eventually she tried being nice to me but I couldn’t stomach it.
But at the end of the day, you’ve been okay with your son around his other girlfriends. Unfortunately you are not always going to like who he is dating but it’s his choice.
Try your best to let go of those feelings. Once you move on, it’ll get easier. You don’t have a say who he gets to bring your son around unless you have a court order. Be a bigger person, you said this happened close to 2 years ago.
He’s with who he wants to be with so you have to except that and move on. As far as his visits with his child you have no control over what he does during his visits as long as baby is not in danger. Yes you sound bitter because you feel like she broke your family up but, it’s not her it’s him.
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Honestly until yall get a court order you can do what you want but if you don’t give him what he wants he could take you to court and trust me courts are brutal. They really don’t care who the child is around as long as they are safe.
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You are bitter and your son shouldn’t have to pay for it
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Follow Yr instincts they’re usually right.
You said you haven’t had a problem with “any other girl he’s been with”, how many girls has it been? That would be my 1st concern, you said your son is only 2. I don’t think multiple partners should be going around your son unless he’s serious with them, committing to them, & seeing a future with them. The same goes to you obviously. If he is serious about the partner and it has been a serious long term relationship then you would have to pit your feelings to the side and allow her in your sons life, as long as she is good to him and treats him well. His dad can also see his child when he’s not with his girlfriends if that not the case. My partner was single for 9 years and only brought his daughter around 1 other person besides me, I didn’t bring my daughter around anyone else until we got together & months later. Lastly, if they are serious she can meet you in person as well and be civilized as well, you can’t allow your personal feeling to affect your sons life. Best of luck and sorry for some of the meaner comments.
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I’d want to meet her first if I was you
You do what you thinks best for your son, but when and if he takes you to court, the courts don’t care about the kids, I went to court with my sons dad as I was worried for the safety of my child being around his dad’s girlfriend as well as at the time they had just been together barely 6 months. Unless that girlfriend has a criminal record of some sort the court won’t do anything and will allow the father to have his girlfriend around your child
If theres no judgement for visits you dont have too. Kids are very important but your serenity is too. Ive been in this same situation before and it ended up little toxic. Your serenity is very important to raising your child.
Unfortunately you have no say in what your ex does when he has the child unless it is harming the child. He can also give the absolute bare minimum of food clothing and shelter and you still can’t do anything. The system sucks!
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Got nothing to do with Ur child seeing it’s dad… PERIOD
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Honestly the reasoning is bc he cheated when you were pregnant. Not for the sake of the child. So yes for tht reason you are being petty. What’s the difference between her and other girls that have already been around your kid. So you didn’t have an issue when it was other girls but now bc it’s her it’s an issue. Yeah you should have had an issue w any females from day 1 not now bc it’s her.
So with that being said. Meet her and put your feelings a side cus I’m sure when he cheated he didn’t mention you at all so don’t blame just her. And if she’s not a terrible person then leave it alone. You can’t control what goes on there but you can def try to be more involved.
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Yes you can not control who he dates. He may no like someone you date so either. It’s not about you and him it’s about your son and to keep your son from his father will do some serious damage.
Your son comes first, he deserves a relationship with his father. What happens if he ends up with this other woman for years to come, will you alienate your ex for choosing to be with her? I can tell you if you do this, your son will end up resentful especially if he makes contact when he is older and realises his dad wanted to be in his life but your bitterness prevented a relationship between them.
If he wants visits with her around and your not ok with it your opinion matters too. He can go to court for his visits like the rest of us have if its that important to him
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Yes, you are bitter. I mean for good reason. But unless she’s given you reason to not trust her actual care or behavior towards your son then her being the woman he cheated on you with is not reason enough to keep your son away from them
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Not your place to tell him who he can and can not have around his son. Same goes for him as well. He’s the father and as long as that little boy isnt in harms way you need to grow up because this isn’t about you or him.
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If you’re split you can’t control your exes life with who and what he does when his child is in his care. It works both ways. Unless it’s hurting your child in some way I’d just say be the bigger person, realise it didn’t work and try and make the best out of a shit situation not for you but for your son.
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I understand that you’re hurt. However that’s something you need to deal with and heal from. Unless the gf is a danger to your child, or the environment is not healthy then it’s not your place to keep the child from his father.
Don’t allow your anger to make you a toxic mother.
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You sound bitter. But I also understand
Those feelings are completely normal. But like any other woman he’s dated, if she is good to your son, that should be all that matters.
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You have to leave your personal opinions at the door I’m afraid and do what’s right for your son. Has this woman given you any reason to believe your child’s safety is at at risk being around her? Do you believe her being in the picture will have a negative effect on the relationship between your son and his dad? Shamefully, there’s not much you can do in the way of who your ex decides to date and vise versa, he can’t dictate who you date. As long as your son is fine being around her then you should allow contact.
It’s not wrong to feel this way, but if in the future you did have a court order visitation agreement you don’t get to decide who is around your son when he visits his dad. Unfortunately. I know it bothers you, but I think you should let your son go to his dads house.
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My son is 1 and his dad cheated on me the whole pregnancy and after until I found out when he was a couple months old, at the time I was obviousally very upset and angry and she apparentally had no idea and they got together at first I was angry and kept saying no to her being round him and eventually got over it and said it was fine, it’s all for my sons good even if I don’t like her , she’s there most times picking up my son n it’s crap you get over n move on 
even tho I was very angry for ages , you pass it eventually x
What he did to you & the fact hes now with the girl has 0 baring on her as a mom or mom figure & courts don’t care as long as she’s not abusive & neglecting your son while in their care… its crappy, but your feelings about her aren’t relevant in the laws view…
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Its a hard position to be in considering who she is and how she is back in his life. She is good to your son so I think you should let your son see his father. Your son is the one affected in all this.
Give her a chance love. Maybe he’s right, maybe he’s not. But give her a chance, if anything happens ONCE under his care, take it to court and get full custody and supervised visits or something.
Unless she has a documented history of child abuse, you have no say.
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Unfortunately you don’t have a choice… if it’s because she was the other woman than no that’s not fair. We won’t always like stuff but unless your son is being treated wrong by her you need to let it go.
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I don’t think it’s healthy that he has all these random woman around your son to begin with. He needs to spend time with his child & wait to play house until he’s in a serious long-term relationship.
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Put your own feelings aside if you want your son to have a relationship with his dad. Don’t be selfish. Flip the situation on yourself and ask yourself the same question lol
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U can’t control who he dates or has around ur son. Yes u sound bitter and jealous.
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I definitely understand. Your feelings are 200% valid. I went through something similar. The woman ended up treating my son like trash 3 years later. However, you sound like a bitter baby mama 
Ull just have to step up and b gracious.
If this is the woman he chooses to be with, dont depribe son of being with dad, you have to know matter how hard, come to terms with this, im on your side but he needs his dad.Hopefully you will meet yourself a good man soon.
I was in your same situation 5.5 years ago. My son is now 5 and I have learned to keep adult problems amongst adults and never speak ill of my son’s father, time will let my son see everything on his own. I hope you find peace in knowing that whatever you do towards your son’s father will be reflected poorly on you (obviously if it is negative). Let life take care of whatever he did or didn’t do. Time will show your son who was there for him and who wasn’t. I found out my son’s father was in a 5 year relationship when my son was 2 months old and my son was a secret from everywhere on his father’s side for an entire year! His parents only found out because they found the piece of paper we signed stating he would give me x amount of money every month for the care of my son. I never took him to court and I’ve never scooped down to a level I would regret later on. Remember, you can only control how to react to things that happen to you and let life take care of others and don’t let anyone make you lose your cool so to speak. Sorry I rambled, this post just hit too close to home. Good luck to you and your son and always keep your head up and remember you are a mama bear and protect your cub at all costs. 
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Honestly it sounds a little bitter. I don’t blame you in the slightest, but you don’t have a say in who your ex dates and who he brings your child around. It’ll be hard but so long as she is good to your son, let him go with his dad.
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Yes. Because no court would rule in your favor. As song as she isn’t a threat to your son, if he were to take you to court he’d win. This is a normal way to feel though.
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It’s ok for you to feel the way you do. But he cheated on you not your son. It’s no longer your relationship with him, but it’s your son’s relationship. As long as she is good to your son that is all that matters. As for you maybe get some therapy or talk to dad about meeting the other women. I’d you can not let it go you will always be resentful and find a reason why she’s not a good person. She also didn’t cheat on you he did. Remember that
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Your issues with him and her have nothing to do with your son that is btwn u and them don’t make ur son suffer don’t put him in the middle of adult drama
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The entire situation sucks and it’s going to hard. However it isn’t about your feelings or your exs feelings. It’s solely about your son getting go see both parents.
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That’s not your decision. It’s about what’s best for your child and not letting the child go because you don’t like his girlfriend is shameful at best. You can’t withhold him to punish him for shit decisions he made towards you. This isn’t about you so keep your head up and be the bigger person…. So the answers are
Yes you Should let him go
Yes you sound bother
And yes you sound unreasonable
Yes it’s wrong. You’re hurting your child by being selfish. Get over yourself
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Do not break the father son bond, let it go and move on
What most moms don’t understand is, you don’t have a choice. Suuuure. You can tell him no this time. But it’s going to do nothing but piss him off and make life harder for everyone involved. She hurt you not your son.
This is about your son getting daddy time, leave your feelings out of it unless you see physical harm.
They both cheated on you assuming she knew about you. I know it hurts but he is the dad.
You would lose in court unless their are documents of abuse
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Yes. You sound bitter.
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It’s not your choice who your son is around while he’s with his father…
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