When I married my husband I inherited a new step daughter. We have been married for 4 years and Im concerned about her and I. There is times he has gotten pushy with her but not me… but he is mentally abusive to us both. We both deserve so much better. I want to leave but I don’t want her to go with him cause I fear for her safety. I love this child like she would be my own. Her bio mom relinquished her rights to the her when she was just a baby. My husband has no other family or friends to go to that can be trusted with the daughter. They are either on dr*gs, nasty single men that have a very bad history. What are my options here to try to make sure that I can get custody of her? Or what can I do?
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If you can stay long enough maybe ask if you can legally adopt her “in case something happens to him so she doesn’t go in the system”. That way he might be more inclined to get it done right away
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I have no advice. Just wanted to say you are amazing and all step moms should be like you.
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1st things 1st. Adopt her as your own so you have rights in the event of a divorce
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I’m not real sure if you can do much or anything at all. Did you adopt this child as yours when you got married?
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You’ll need evidence of the abusive nature, otherwise it’s just hearsay. Document everything possible; keep texts, video him if possible. You’ll want all that when you take it to court. Start looking for a good lawyer, call around, ask if they do free consults. Some might be willing to do a payment plan with you if money is an issue. Best of luck to you both, I hope you’re able to get the both of you out of that situation. 
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Consult with a lawyer for the laws in your state. It’s very possible that if you adopt her, she is old enough for the judge to consider her wishes during a divorce.
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Have evidence of the abuse, go seek legal counsel and it should not be hard for you to get her. A friend of mine, has custody of her step son!!
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I’m not saying all but in some states they have free lawyers at the court house on certain days I would look into it and if they do where you live go talk to them and ask them what you can do but I would also keep records of everything
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Your best bet, if her biological mother relinquished her rights to the father, would be to legally adopt her. Once that’s done, she’s as much yours as his and you can provide proof of abuse during the divorce.
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Go to juvinile court and file for emergency custody of her. Let them know what’s going on and the concerns you have. You don’t have to adopt her to do this. Go see what you need to do to keep her safe. You have been her mom for 4 years. They take that seriously.
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Have you adopted her? If not only thing you’ll be able to do is contact child services and hope for the best. Legally unless you’ve adopted her there’s nothing you can do except have proof of the abuse towards her and find help for her
Call social services they will go to her school and talk to her if she is uncomfterble with the way he treats her they will take care of it…but you can tell them what’s going on then they will go talk to her … 
prayers it works out for you and her …
You have to legally adopt her until then you have absolutely no legal rights to her. Even then you can’t just leave as most courts need some serious abuse for him to loose his custody and visitation rights.
Be nice to him. Tell him you would officially like to adopt her. Talk to her too. Record him being abusive…save them. Go to court adopt her, file for custody .
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See if she wants you to adopt her… go that route and then after it’s final… pick your next steps
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If If you adopted her you have just as much rights to her as he does.
Keep documentation and call a lawyer for legal advise
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I’d call a lawyer. My thoughts are that you should keep a journal like on your phone saved or sent to someone so he can’t delete it. Then call CPS. If you have enough evidence & can get her taken from her try to get her placed with you as family. Whatever you do do it fast. Since you know he’s abusive, not removing her or calling authorities makes you guilty of failure to protect.
This might take some time but if it was me I would ask him if you could legally adopt her and get all the paperwork ready get it signed and legalize then when I knew I had full rights I would start preparing to get divorced and taking her with me
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I would suggest maybe look into Adopting your step daughter. Or could you wait until dad isn’t in the Picture and if she trust you talk to her and ask her what she would like.
Talk with an attorney in your county. They will be better able to tell you what is acceptable and legal. Any advice here will be from personal experience and not necessarily from your state/county where the paperwork would need to filed.
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Adopt her first then proceed from there.
My best friend was in this situation… she manipulated him (for the best reason ever) and endured the violence long enough to adopt his son. As soon as that was accomplished, she left and took her son with her. She saved his life and I’m so proud of the sacrifices she made to do so. It was the hardest thing she ever went through. Get a lawyer and put your best acting skills to the test to get him to allow you to adopt. Along the way, document EVERYTHING. This is a long game that I pray you win.
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Go to the police and that will help you.
Depends on what state you’re in, some states allow any person who is a childcare’s “parent” petition for custody. You should ask an attorney or convince him to let you adopt her that’s the easiest way. Then you can literally just move out and divorce him. You could also move out, take her with your and file for guardianship of her on the grounds he’s unfit
Prayers for her family. Amene
Go to the doctors & explain wots hapnin & start a paper trail (record) of wots hapning then u hav something to fall back on…goodluck x
I’d pursue legal adoption first (if you can stay that long) and then the divorce as you would then have legal rights to her as of she were your own.
Adopt her now while he can give consent. Then wait till it’s final and leave.
Ask him if you could legally adopt her as your daughter. It’s a process, but it’s your best way to get out of there with her. You can’t do much otherwise. Document everything, save screenshots of your texts with him, take video if you are able, record conversations and email them to yourself to make sure you have backups in case something happens to your phone. Then after the adoption (if he says yes) take your evidence to court and file for divorce and petition for custody. Unless you can do all of that, everything “he said she said.”
There’s not much you can do if you didn’t adopt her. Super unfortunate 
Contact a family law attorney in your state/county.
Unless you adopt her you have no rights to her, sadly…
Thank you this is what kids need people who actually want to protect them… you were put in that position to help and I’m glad you’re taking full owernership and not just helping yourself
The burden of proof is on you.
Try and adopt her because then you should have as many rights as him when it comes to her.
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I really recommend speaking with a good family lawyer. Not asking for Facebook advice. Id hate to see bad advice given.
Adoption. Start filing papers to adopt her.
Since mom has given up her rights you can usually do step parent adoption which would give you legal rights to her then you can file for custody
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I would absolutely find a good family law attorney in your area and schedule a free consultation to see what your actual legal rights are in this situation. I would hate to see bad advice from the internet steer you in the wrong direction. Most if not all attorneys with do a free consultation. Is adoption an option since you are married and mom signed away rights? If you adopt her you are legally as much her parent as he is. But for sure find an attorney to discuss this with asap!
Should have tried to adopt her after you were married
I’m no help but I hope it all works out 
Depends on what state you’re in but I know of a similar situation and the people weren’t even related to the child and they won custody of child in court.
Seek advice from an attorney regarding adoption
Or adopt her then leave safety together
File for emergency custody and a child protective order. Document everything and report this man
Is the bio mom still in the picture? Does she still have rights? Sadly us step parents don’t have rights unless we have adopted them legally. If she has no rights I know of step parents who have legally gotten custody of step kids. Convince him to let you adopt her.