How can I get my 5 year old to sleep in her own room?

I am having trouble keeping my 5 yr old girl to sleep in her own bed. I have tried everything. She won’t stay in her bed. I bought her a twin bed last year and still not wanting to sleep in it. She has a night light, and I have a camera in her room. I have done the bedtime routine. I put her to bed. I think she is asleep, and then the next thing I know, she is coming into my room. Help, please! Any suggestions would be helpful.

48 Likes

Personally, I would say just let her, time flies as is. My daughter is 7 now , has decided to sleep in her own bed. She still wants to sleep with me at times though. It does get old for me, when she isn’t sleeping with me I miss her.

You just need to persevere and keep putting her back to bed in her room no matter how tedious it gets. She’ll soon learn that she can’t keep coming into your room all the time.

But have you asked her why she doesn’t want to sleep in her bed? Children often do it because they know they can and you’ll give in to it.

1 Like

Put a gate in front of her door that she can’t open or, sense you have a camera to watch her in her room, put a lock on her door that locks from the outside.

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How can I get my 5 year old to sleep in her own room?

1 Like

Tell her the monster in her room is now under your bed.

27 Likes

Keep taking her to her bed. And dont say there’s a monster because that’ll cause her to panic. My 3 year old does fine. It’s about comfort . Dad or me will wake up and walk him back to his bed and he will go back to sleep. But be consistent and don’t give in.

4 Likes

I’m not opposed to bribery lol. Just recently got my 5 year old a new bed and I told her if she sleeps in her bed all night, every night this week then we can get ice cream or do a special activity of her choice. It’s working really well so far.

9 Likes

We find our daughter stays in bed or at least in her room when we put a baby gate up for bedtime. We’re anti closed doors until she gets much older. So this way she stays in her room and knows we’re around and knows she’s not alone at the same time.

3 Likes

My 3 year old did this. I did the “I’ll be right back” method. Lay her in bed tell her goodnight and say “I’ll be right back to check on ya” then 1 minuter come right back. Keep doing it adding additional minutes.

3 Likes

I just got my 5 and 3 year olds sleeping in their own beds. I did a sticker sheet and a treasure box. Every night they slept in their bed, they get a sticker on the sticker sheet in the morning. And every 2 or 3 nights they sleep in their bed, they can pick from the treasure chest. You also HAVE to be consistent. If she gets up, put her back in bed. Giving in and letting her climb in your bed frequently will make the habit not stick.

5 Likes

Life is short and they grow fast. Cherish the fact she wants to be next you. There will come a time when her independence will change it all

11 Likes

Well I just went through this with my daughter who is 6 so it took me laying in her room until I knew she was completely asleep I almost have to do it every night but she has been sleeping all night In her own bed

1 Like

Keep putting her back in her bed no matter how many times it takes.

1 Like

I’m having issues with.my 2.5 yr old he sleeps with me every night hoping it’s a faze and goes away

Put a gate up in your doorway. Don’t let her hang out in your room or bed during the day either. Make your room off limits.

2 Likes

It took a lot of consistency and one of those digital clocks that changes colors. If she came in my room. I’d calmly walk her back without saying anything to her. Eventually she got too tired and stayed. Did this for a week or so.

The clock helped, we set a time she could come in my room and it turned green when she was allowed.

1 Like

Try moving the bed into your room and having her sleep in the bed in your room next to your bed and once she gets comfortable with that move the bed back into her room and constantly reassure her that she’s a big girl and that she’s doing very well. Also if she is still doing nap, take her naps away so that she’s tired and falls asleep quicker

Sleep in with her for a couple of weeks and then try and move slowly out of her room as the nights go on.

I’d say find which ever way you think it might work best with your child (treats, laying with them or whatever)… an no matter what stick to it! It’s hard for maybe 3-4 days but after that there is light at the end of the tunnel! :heart:

Walk her back. Tears and all

Tryed a tôy of a real puppy

I would drag a mattress or blow up bed in her room and sleep in there until she gets comfortable. She just wants to be near you where she feels safe im sure.
That’s why I crawled in bed with my parents when I was a kid.
She also might be scared of her room? It might not feel calming?
Those are things I would investigate.

Please dont punish her or anything if she can’t get sleeping alone right. This is a way of teaching her to be independent and there’s nothing wrong with her wanting to be close to you. Punishing for this can be very traumatic

2 Likes

I’m here to tell you, from experience, enjoy those snuggles as long as you can. There will come a time they won’t want to do it. Just like potty training, you can’t force it. They will do it when they are ready. People told me my daughter would become a lesbian sleeping in my bed. :rofl: Guess what? Thirty three years later, shes not. I still like when we have bedtime tv marathons together and so does she.

1 Like

Just don’t say nothing to her and take her back to bed Tuck her back in kiss her good night and do it every time she comes into your room don’t say nothing to her just take her back to the room give her a kiss good night , leave , just keep doing it she will get tired and should go to sleep and I think that should work… good luck… do it every night

She’s 5…. You literally just tell her she’s going to sleep in her own room, walk out and leave her there :tipping_hand_woman:t4:. At that age she should be able to understand and follow direction

5 Likes

If my daughter doesn’t play outside or burn a lot of energy she has more trouble falling asleep and when she comes back from her Dads house she’s always off schedule but I make sure to let her wind down every night and give her an epsom salt bath I also spray “monster spray” it’s just lavender spray and I put LED lights behind and on the side of her bed and have another nightlight she likes to snuggle a stuffed animal at bed time and I usually read her 1 to 3 books and then when we are done I put on Unicorn meditation for kids on YouTube every night and it helps her fall asleep!

1 Like

I have same problem with my 6 year old. I tried a bed in my room, I tried sleeping I. Her room, I tried packing her to bed after falling asleep, n I tried begging…I need the help too

I’ve had to tell my son when he was 3 “I’ll come check on you in 5 minutes”

When she comes back to your bed u get up place her back in her bed and tell her it’s bed time love u good night and walk out. Keep going she will catch on might take a few hours but it’ll work

We were having this issue. I got her a calendar and some stickers. If she stayed in her bed all night, she got to put a sticker on her calendar. Once she hit 30 days of sleeping in her own bed we went and did a fun, family activity. First we went to a trampoline park (and I kept reminding her that once her calendar was full, she got to go to the trampoline park) it worked and she stays in her bed so she can get a sticker in the morning. Best of luck to you! :heart:

1 Like

Simple: put a baby gate up in her door…she may tire of the obstacle course

Dnt give in make her stay in he town bed

Just have to stick it day after After day until she goes for it :slight_smile:

Good luck, I have a 9 year old that will make a pallet on my floor.

2 Likes

Turn her door handle up side down so she can’t open it

One day you will miss her sleeping with you.

2 Likes

My son is 3 and we tried getting him into his own bed a while ago, we even had to get a bigger bed because we were just all so uncomfortable in the queen bed, we just didn’t have enough room. I’ve come to the conclusion that he will do it when he’s ready and he is my last baby, I got my tubes tied after I had him, so I just cherish these last few days/years he wants to sleep with us. Eventually he will be a big boy and want to sleep in his bed but for now I just let him stay with us, it makes me sad knowing he is my last so I cherish every moment I get to be/sleep/cuddle with him! I know there will come a time when he doesn’t want to anymore and it makes me sad so for now he will sleep whenever he is comfortable!

2 Likes

Take her back to her bed do not speak or let her try and reason with you.

1 Like

This worked for my almost 4 year old.

When you figure it out, let me know so I can get my 8 yr old in her room

Please don’t do the things like “lock her in there” or “turn her doorknob upside down” those things could scar a child for life & not only that what if for some reason there was an emergency & she couldn’t get out. Those are very dangerous suggestions.

11 Likes

Every single time. Put her back in her own bed. Keep talking to a minimum. Eventually. As tough as it will be she will stay in her own bed.

2 Likes

You just gotta stick to taking her back to her room, you’ll have some sleepless nights but it’ll be worth it. I had to do that with my now 3yr old when he was 2 because we had a new baby coming so 4 of us in one bed was not gonna happen. I did it heavily pregnant going back and forth comforting and letting him know that this was HIS bed and that we could no longer sleep together cause baby was coming etc. He turned 3 in February and he loves his bed sometimes he’ll fall asleep in ours but we always take him to his.

4 Likes

Our 6 year old occasionally comes into our room. I say occasionally but depending on the week it can be up to three or four times. It’s always over in the middle of the night between 2:00 and 5:00 a.m. at that point I’m not fighting with her to go back to her bed she just gets in between me and my husband and we all fall back asleep. We’ve tried everything we got her a new bed we got a mattress protector that adds a tiny amount of cushion. We got new pillows. She has the night light that is on the monitor that is still in her room she has a plug-in Minnie mouse night light. We always ask her the next morning what happened why did you come in here? Her response she just wants to chill. :joy: I’ve been told by other moms that I need to enjoy it because it won’t last forever so we try to do things during the day to tire her out. The days that she goes swimming we don’t see her until the next morning she stays in her bed all night.

Honestly I made the biggest mistake letting mine sleep in my bed! :sob: shes 11 and has a spare mattress on the floor for the nights she wakes up and wants to come in. If I could do it all over again I’d never would have let her in my bed!!! So honey I feel your pain! But it’s also okay! No matter what you did what you felt necessary for your kiddo!

Keep trying she will when she is ready…

1 Like

She will go yo her room don’t push her she loves her mommy

1 Like

I let my 5 year old fall asleep in my bed. And then carry him to his when he’s asleep

Put her back in her bed as hard as it may be. EVERYTIME. I wouldn’t say don’t speak to her or reason with her. Explain to her that if there’s something in there that would hurt her you wouldn’t make her sleep in there and that if something is wrong she can come to your room. I even stayed in the room with my boys until they fell asleep and I would tell them I’m going in the kitchen to clean I’ll come right back to check on you and I would until they fell asleep and then eventually they would lay down bc they knew I wasn’t far and I did and still do check on them throughout the night. I have an 11, 6 and 4 yr old.

6 Likes

I’m going to say this as a mom to a teenage girl. Cherish the cuddles and her wanting to be close now. Once the teenage years hit the cuddling is not so cool anymore. Don’t get me wrong my daughter and I are close but she at the age she rather be in her room talking to friends. They grow up quick. Enjoy them while they are little.

4 Likes

Our 6 and 3 1/2 year old are still not sleeping in their own room. We got them new bedding and bunk beds and praying tonight they sleep in there :joy::sob:
We can’t shut the door cause they need to be able to get to the bathroom. It doesn’t matter how many times we put them back to bed they still wake up and run into our room.

lock your door use monster spray under her bed

Speaking from the other foot and being that kid who slept with my mum till like 8 and still do every now and then and my daughter jumps in . We do eventually go to our own beds hahaha
Don’t rush it. You will miss us!!!

2 Likes

If you are actually serious. You’ll have to get serious with her about it. By 3 years old children understand consequences for thier chosen behaviors. . If They Have Them

1 Like

Enjoy it or lay down with her in her bed till she’s asleep

1 Like

Put a gate across your doorway

1 Like

You have to be patient and consistent. Every time she gets out of bed, do not say anything or negotiate or plead or argue. Take her gently by the hand and place her back in bed, tuck her in and say goodnight. No matter how many times it takes.

3 Likes

I allow it. She won’t be little for long. And I know I will miss that.

3 Likes

Keep putting her back in her bed and don’t let her sleep in your room anymore but then again I let my kids sleep w me till like whenever didn’t bother me lol

3 Likes

be consistent. if you want her to sleep in her room, when she comes to your room take her back to her room; however as another said, she won’t be little that much longer and you may wish you had let her go ahead. have you thought about putting a small bed and/or mat down by your bed and having her sleep there?

1 Like

My almost 6 year old wants to sleep in her room and I’m sad

1 Like

We share rooms, but not beds with our kids. :woman_shrugging:t2: Might be an option for you, idk. It works for our 2 and 3 year olds.

Make a bed on the floor for her ? I ended up having to do that to break the habit of kids crawling in bed with me all hours of the night and keeping me up when I had to work. I also used to lay down with each child till they fell asleep, that helped them feel secure. Don’t spend to
Much time or stress though “breaking “ the habit, just be calm and comforting. Nighttime can be scary for kids. Good luck :relaxed:

3 Likes

Consistency is the key. But the comfort for them is all they care about. When you marry someone do you like sleeping in the bed without them (unless absolutely necessary)? Probably not. That’s all it is. They just want you by them. They will learn the more you take them back to their bed that that is where they should sleep and it’s ok. My son sleeps with a night light a box fan and a crap ton of Mickey mouses around him to make him comfortable.

1 Like

Keep putting her back every time!

I put a TV In my kids room🤷 let them match their favorite movie til they fall asleep. I have kids from 13yrs to 17mos. I’m too wore out at the end of day to keep putting them back in their beds :roll_eyes:

1 Like

Reward her for each hour she stays in her bed, make a big deal of it and lots of praise. Simple cute rewards and when it’s an all nighter throw a tea party and gently end rewards.

1 Like

What you allow is what will continue. Consistently take her back to her bed every time.

5 Likes

I had to sit right outside my son’s door, so everytime he tried to come out I was right there so he would close the door and run back to his bed. He gave up after about 4 times each night for 3 nights… after that… no problem… he was 2

2 Likes

If it’s a separation anxiety thing get walkie talkies. That way she knows you are always with her even when she is in bed. I had to do this with my son and eventually he quit using them, and sleeps just fine in his own room.

2 Likes

This worked for us we let ours watch a short video on the tv in their room, they were always asleep before video ended. Just do what works for you.

Send her right back to bed… I tell my son he can come in if he’s sick or has a nightmare. If not it’s right back to bed. Depending on his mood I’ll give him a 5 minute cuddle to fill his little love tank but off he goes to his own bed after.

1 Like

Cuz u live an an Amityville house look alike lol…

You are not firm enough. She does not believe you mean it or she would not be coming back to your bed.

1 Like

Try the word NO, and take her right back to her own bed.

2 Likes

My 19 year old grew in the blink of an eye. My 6 year old (almost 14 years apart) will be my baby until she isn’t. Cherish it. I swear when I can get snuggles in, I do. My soon to be 20 year old is over me :confused:

3 Likes

Night light is probably keeping her awake. Lights disrupt our natural sleep cycles. Id tell her go to sleep and don’t get out of bed again unless she has to use the bathroom.

Take her back as many times as she tries to come into your room.

1 Like

We had a similar issue, we have a baby gate across her doorway, but her bed is positioned so she can lay in her bed and be able to see us in our room. As well as having to leave the bathroom light on as she doesn’t like the dark .

Lock the doors :grimacing: hopefully she’ll go back to her bed

1 Like

Put a mattress on the floor in your room and if she ends up falling asleep on it not a problem.

My daughter has this issue too. She falls asleep with her light on and then I turn it off once she’s asleep but she also has a lamp and the light bulb changes color and she picks it the color

Just keep taking her back to bed to her room and explain that its just not happening any more, stand firm, she will give up eventually! She’s playing on your softness!

1 Like

Children’s Melatonin. Just long enough to get in the routine of sleeping in the bedroom

I would have put her in her own bed way sooner, but at 5 years old there’s no reason why she can’t fully understand you when you tell her to stay in bed. If you’re caving and letting her stay in your bed just because she gets up and comes in there then that’s your fault. Walk her back to her room, put her back in bed and tell her again not to get up. She’s a big girl and she can sleep in her own bed like one.

1 Like

Put her back to bed. Be a parent. Set rules. Stick to them.

1 Like

My almost 5 year old falls asleep in her bed and comes to me around 5 in the morning… I just enjoy the snuggles because I know it won’t last long

1 Like

My 4 year old had never slept on her own until last week. To get her out of our bed we moved our bed into her bedroom right next to her bed. She had to sleep in her bed, but we could still hold hands. After a month or so I began to mention how much more room she would have in her room, how we could put certain things where our bed was etc. One morning she said she was ready for our bed to move. We quickly moved it, and she has slept alone most of the time. 1 night she woke up after having a bad dream and wanted to sleep with us. I told her no and took her back to her bed. I slept on the floor next to her bed. She hasn’t asked since. It might not work for everyone, but it worked for us

Just let her sleep there. Eventually she’ll go back to her room. Be happy she wants to be with you.
My sister became a widow when her children were quite young. Because of her financial situation she had to share the bedroom. It all worked out.

3 Likes

Continue to put her in her bed each night and When she comes to your room do NOT let her in your bed Tell her if she insists on sleeping in your room she has to sleep on the floor and do not set the space up for her have her get her own blanket and pillow and no cushy mattress straight on the floor (Its kinds like a first step to her not being in your space but her knowing your still right there is security ) Shell soon realize shes ok and will stay in her own bed

I lead my son back to his bed every single time (at points with him kicking and screaming) however many times a night and I’m talking sometimes 20x until he finally got that I wasn’t messing around with it

7 Likes

My mom made me get a sleeping bag if I wasn’t going to sleep in my bed in my room. I got tired of sleeping on the floor and stayed in my room. Tough love

7 Likes

She could be going through separate anxiety cause my kids go through the same thing when Myself and my mom isn’t in the same room and they seek us out and went back to bed laying next to us again.

I put glow in the dark stars on the ceiling. I asked her to count them ! Good night

No worries. She just needs a little more time.

2 Likes

Get. A sleeping cot and set it up in your room eventually she’ll get tired if it and go to her own bed

It gets tiring but I would put them back in their bed Everytime my girls would come to my bed and it did take a couple of days but it worked. If they get right back up to go to my bed I would do it again.

3 Likes

Find a pool noodle to tape down to the mattress and cover with the fitted sheet. Sometimes the small bumper will provide the feeling of safety. Night lights are fabulous, and super fun now.

1 Like

super nanny method keep putting them back don’t waiver or give up it took us a good two weeks of no sleep and up and down and tears

1 Like