Jhanki has hit the nail on the head .as long as you are not physically violent which you are not then gramma must not interfere.also she must not destroy your authority in front of your child.the child will never respect you .talk to her but be firm and Move out asap
Let her raise the child in question. If she wants to have the say in the rearing of that child, she should have to pay for it. If she isn’t paying for the child, it isn’t for her to say.
no, not all grandmas do that, spoiling in not letting them do as they please. move out and separate them for a while. tell your Mother you love her and thank her for helping but you will not have any more of her making you the bad guy. her behavior will go with her to day care and school. then you will have problems. good luck
The best thing to do is move out as soon as possible Grandmother is created a monster and leaving to correct her she needs to understand there are consequences for her actions preschool could be a nightmare if her actions aren’t corrected
OK, this my take.
1You feel obligated to her because she has been there for you. The above discussions should not occur in front of the children
2. Ask your mother 2 things…how did she handle you at that age when you were sassy?
What does she think when she sees other children acting out in public?
Calmly ( re) explain by her enabling your daughter she is creating a menace to Society.
I agree with others concerning restricting their time together. If all else fails involve a family therapist. I pray your mother is reasonable and she understands the message. Do you work? Is your mom the primary baby sitter?
I am concerned with the she wont “Let you” move out. You’re an adult raising your children. She has nothing to say about it unless shes paying all your bills. You need to be firm not mean and say Im raising my children the way I see fit. Im sorry if you do not approve but its whats best for them. I see your moms contradictory of your discipline as a way of trying to steal your daughters affection from you by being your daughters protector. Maybe her mother did that to her with you? If you feel like your the heavy explain calmly to your daughter in front of granma that Granma thinks shes helping but she isnt because when you go to school they will not allow you to behave this way. Im trying to ready you for school. Stand your ground its important to your children to have strong boundaries.
You need to keep her away from your daughter until your mom is willing to follow your rules. She is not helping her granddaughter grow to be a productive adult, but a spoiled brat. Day care might not accept her either.
Take it from someone who didn’t stop her mother’s identical behavior - put an end to it right now. You need to a serious sit down with your mom and explain that this stops or she will not see your child. The worst mistake I made as a mom was allowing my mom to dictate how I raised my child.
Our grand kids were & still are well-behaved & we always followed their parents rules & expectations! They may have received extra treats, time & adventures, but they were definitely not spoiled by us!
I have been a Grandma for years and l only step in only when asked and if child is is danger, and l have a good relationship with my granddaughters and daughter-in-law and my son
Show her these comments may be she will get it and ask her if she raised you to act out.
She cannot tell you you not to move you are an adult