How do I stop thinking about women?

Maybe you aren’t bi. Maybe you are a lesbian.

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I’m bi I’ve caught myself fantasizing about women I’ve told my husband we’re very open but I would never go so far to say I want to be with one I found the one that was meant for me I love my husband just because I’m bi the attraction still there but me and him like to experiment maybe try new stuff in the bedroom find what you really like different toys different positions experiment a little bit it might bring the spark back for both of y’all and if he’s willing to go to a sex shop and pick out toys together things you think you and him might like

Oooo if a man cheated and it was posted in here. The results would be totally diff! “Sleep with his daddy, best friend, burn his shit, you deserve better, he aint shit”

Your husband deserves better than someone who completely disrespected him :woman_shrugging:t2:

I think this is something that you guys need to discuss in therapy with someone well versed with this type of issue. Depending on what you’re looking at as far as sex with him it could just be that he needs more practice. I hope you guys can jump this hurdle together and work past the previous infidelity!

As a bisexual, we don’t claim this CHEATER. You’re the reason we face so much hate and erasure, even in our own community.

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Do you “have love” for him or are you “in love” with him. If it’s isn’t the latter, you are honestly keeping him from experiencing true love. That’s not right. Plus, like others said if you aren’t 100% committed, you will likely cheat again. That’s just my opinion.

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Well it sounds ike to me you may be more attractive to women still more then men . And if that is the fact you need to let him go and let him find happiness with someone that will live him and be attractive to him with everything that they have. Just be honest with him and tell him the attraction isn’t there any more and you have realized women is what you really wanna be with I’m sure he would understand other than u cheating on him. And I so t blame him I wouldn’t want a open relationship niether. You both deserve to be happy so have that talk .

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I get it, but you should probably get divorced

Don’t expect him to share if you don’t want to share just because you want to be with a woman!! Your better off getting a divorce to be with a woman, it’s not fair on him or you.

You being bi isn’t relevant. It’s just an excuse. You’re a cheater and your husband deserves better.

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Honestly it sounds like you may be lesbian :grimacing: I’m also bisexual and have been with women before but my husband is all I think about. When we are intimate my mind doesn’t go elsewhere. Hell even outside of being intimate it doesn’t because I love him and truly believe we are meant to be together. If your heart and mind aren’t in it girl there may be a deeper reason. Maybe if you want to try and keep your marriage try and see a therapist and see if you can see if there is something deeper going on. Good luck!!

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Well I don’t think you can. If you are more attracted to woman you won’t really ever be satisfied with a man. It may be time to cut ties.

Why would you get married to either a man or a woman if you’re bi? Obviously you’ll never be satisfied being with one the rest of your life hence the cheating. You should let the man be free.

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Maybe polyamory? A girlfriend.

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It sounds like you shouldn’t be in this type of relationship.

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If you can’t commit you should not be married. Has nothing to do with you being bi.

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Maybe you are pure lesbian. Maybe you shouldn’t be with a man. When you cheat it’s a choice not an accident. It’s sounds like you have no intention on stopping. I would divorce him and let him find real love. I really don’t understand how it is so much better women on women. Not trying to be mean I just really don’t get it.

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If you love him enough you will find a way. Its all up to you and the actions you take. Frankly if you cant bring yourself to love him like he deserves let him go.

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If you want this marriage to work out then you need counseling for yourself and some couples counseling to work on your communication skills, mayberry he just does not understand what you are trying to explain.

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Your fighting something that you cant change it looks like. You said you give your husband pointers and he doesnt get it thats probably because hes not a woman lol ask yourself is the constant desire for the attention of a woman greater then wanting to stay in your marriage or can you focus on your marriage and be committed to him while putting the desire of a woman to rest. You need to decide what you truly want for your life. You cant have both so you need to put your “Big Girl Panties On” and make a decision you will be happy with for the rest of your life because you deserve to be happy but its a heartless situation for you to have your husband not knowing what u want. And its obvious your not vested completely in your marriage and im sure your husband sees and feel that. If you so love your husband then make a decision and once youve done that sit him down and have an honest talk. If you stay in the marriage and its truly not what u want your going to hurt him if you decide its not your husband you want to be with yes its still going to hurt him but at least he wont have the hurt of not knowing where he stands with u and he can begin to heal n start his life. Love is not selfish so woman up and decide whats best for you it will truly also be whats best for him. Good Luck

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Therapy for both of you

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You shouldn’t of got married in the first place

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The real dating scene sucks!
There is no loyalty anymore!
:angry::angry::angry:

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Cheating is not part of the ups and downs. Sorry it’s just true. You don’t cheat on a person if you genuinely love them. You aren’t happy. You aren’t satisfied. You want to be with a woman. So leave this poor man and go be with a woman and stop hurting him. If you love him even a little you would do that.

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You’re not bisexual, you’re gay.

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If you are not happy in your marriage, leave. Don’t blame your sexuality on not being able to stay faithful.

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If u don’t want to hurt him , let him go then. Because these feelings you have will never go away and if you’re trying to have an open relationship then what’s the point in being married? Just be single and explore/find yourself first before settling down

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I believe only God can help you. This world is so corrupt and talked about in the Bible as what will happen in the last days. We are I. Those times and what was good is now evil and what was evil is now considered good. Prayers sent for you in hopes that you will be receptive of the plan God has for each of our lives. God bless you as you give this amazing man either a chance to continue being amazing with you or if you can’t get away from satans hold on you, I pray he will find another woman to be amazing to. God bless you and prayers for strength.

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Sounds like you’re pushing more towards the lesbian side than the bi side

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You already know the answers to your questions and you owe it to this wonderful man to be honest and leave him in peace.

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You’re not bi, you like just WOMEN

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:eyes: you can’t turn off desires - no “off” or “on” switch - sorry

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Why marry someone just to give up? It’s clear in the vows that it’s through the good and the bad. Cheating and not being loyal is the opposite. My man would’ve been straight done if I cheated. And your sex life isn’t always supposed to be perfect. Highs and lows. Work on your marriage or leave him.

You’re very confused. It was not fair to either one of you when you married your husband especially since you cheated on him. You need to get your own head straight before even being in a relationship. Let the poor guy go find happiness with someone that will be dedicated to him alone and find yourself before getting hooked up again. :woman_shrugging:t3:

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Being bi has NOTHING to do with you cheating :joy::joy::joy::joy:

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By your man turning down a threescore he sounds like a great guy go find a woman let him be happy with a woman that wants him.

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I feel you like the way he treats you, so you stay. But that’s selfish if you can’t be loyal to him. That is a sign of you using him for your own benefit. Staying will hurt him more in the long run if you don’t give him a chance to find someone who truly loves him!

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You’re hurting him by stringing him along. Tell him the truth tell him you are fantasizing about women sexually. You can love someone and still be attracted to other people but you’re literally saying you’re not enjoying having sex with him so why not let him find somebody that does enjoy sex with him and you can seek women if that’s what you desire as well. You can’t go on hurting his feelings though you need to be up front even if it is uncomfortable.

Can’t have you’re cake & eat it too :woman_shrugging:t3:
If you love him so much then not thinking about other women should be easy if it’s not then leave him & stop leading him on.

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Honey, you’re not bi, you’re a lesbian. Be fair to him and yourself and be with a woman.

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Stop being selfish. If you’re marriage isn’t working then end it. But stop thinking of your self .

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Have 2 kids, back to back. You’ll never want sex again, lol.

You’re gonna loose your relationship over lust and desire lol like most people. It’s like we pretend we have no control over our actions? Lol

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As someone who’s been cheated on repeatedly and seen the absolute trauma it causes within families. Cheating is never, ever acceptable. Not once. Not for any reason. It shows a clear disrespect and lack of love for the person you’re with. I’ve told people I’ve been with before that I’d rather they call and break up with me before than to do it behind my back. If you love him this wouldn’t be a struggle. You obviously love having sex with women more than you love him so let that man go and find someone you love enough that cheating would never be an option.

The fact that being with a woman is almost a fantasy of yours 24/7 could mean you’re either just not satisfied intimately in your marriage. Or you may be gay. Nothing wrong with either, but leave him if you are just thinking about other women.

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Be true to yourself. He’s a great man, yes, but that doesn’t mean you’re gonna be happy. He doesn’t deserve that. You don’t deserve it either. Make a choice, even if it hurts.

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You suck. Figure out what you want but until then leave him. Let him be happy with someone who actually values what he offers. This whole situation is unfair to him. You’re awful for cheating on him and blaming it on your sexuality. Being bisexual is not a reason to cheat. It’s your excuse for hurting another person and a way to avoid placing the blame on your shit choices. Do better, ffs.

Um… I kind of think you already know your own answers, maybe you need to either sit and have a real heart to heart with him, counseling or let him go so he can be happy if he doesn’t desire the poly life or open. But you need to be true to yourself and him, best wishes to you.

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You need to be honest with yourself and admit how selfish you’re being. U ruined your marriage with him now he probably doesn’t trust you. You cheat every day by fantasizing about women. You need to figure out what you really want. Or stay single

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Hun… You’re simply a lesbian. And if you firmly believe you are just bi, then leave him. Let him find someone who only wants him. And you go off and bang as many girls as you want. :woman_shrugging:t5:

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I am also a bi woman married to a man and can honestly say I do not have this problem. I find other people attractive sometimes, but it’s I move on because my hubby is my number 1. Sounds like you may actually be gay or just not into monogamy both of which are okay. Cheating on your partner is not okay. If you truly loved him you wouldn’t have cheated.

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I think monogamy just isnt for you. If your husband isnt okay with sharing then his feelings are as valid as yours but you need to quit breaking his heart.

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I think it’s time to let your husband go, let him find someone that, Only wants to be with him!

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You should have stuck to woman I don’t think you are bi because if you were shouldn’t u enjoy your partner regardless of gender. You keep speaking of this with women,that with women. Be true and set the man free rather than have him second guess himself.

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Having a sexual preference is no reason to be a cheating spouse. I can’t stand cheaters who have an excuse. Be a decent person and let your guy go or woman up and stop cheating

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in that case you should suggest a threesome it would satisfy your sexual desire and might make his better

Put yourself in his shoes, imagine feeling like you’re never enough and there’s nothing he can do about it but keep getting to convince you to not want to be with another woman. He showed so much love when he wanted to work with you after you came clean, that should’ve been the last of it period.

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If you want it both was that’s fine but you should be single for that lifestyle and Won’t have to cheat.

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I’d say talk to him about it, when true and unconditional love is present there isn’t anything you can’t work through. Ik we don’t know one another but if you ever want to talk more you can pm me. Best of luck xx

Don’t cheat him be in a poly

You’ve broken your vows to him :disappointed_relieved: do you really want to continue to hurt him? If you’re not happy let him go but at the end of your life when your sex drive is dull what matters is companionship, love, respect.

If you have to ask you already know the answer.

Come clean with him. Try counseling.

let him read your post. more than likely someone you know will read it & tell him

Every love deserves a faithful lover

I’d say, you love him but you aren’t in love with him. Perhaps you’d be better as friends. You owe it to yourself to live your truth and you owe it to him to set him free.

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Unreal…posting this on social media!?!