How did you get over someone you planned on spending your life with? This is hitting me hard and can’t pull myself out of this slump.
51 Likes
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How do you get over someone you planned to spend your life with? - Mamas Uncut
Allow yourself to grieve…
Research grief process and do not get stuck in it.
6 Likes
Because my kids deserve a happy mom not a sad one. He doesn’t get that power
5 Likes
Are you talking about a ended relationship or loosing a loved one?
2 Likes
Hugs sorry you’re hurting … acknowledge what has happened and allow yourself to grieve it is a death of a relationship and a life you planned to share with someone. Healing is a process, give yourself grace. Remember to make sure you show up for yourself and love yourself🌹 hugs
I’m still not over my ex completely and it’s been well over 2 years. Sometimes you just have to acknowledge that you’ll always love them but it’s better you aren’t together and start living your life again.
3 Likes
Time it takes time. You will find your true soul mate! Its hard to lose someone love that you thought was going to be that person. Try to stay positive in every situation! You can do this! 
You have to learn to love yourself all over again and be ok with being alone till you heal and find someone else
Time…. Day by day. Do what makes you feel love for yourself above anything else… don’t dwell on it.
Turn that love back onto yourself. It’s not the only way, but it’s the best way. Become the love of your life.
You leave and love yourself!
1 Like
I am currently struggling with this.
#1 for me is to not glamorize the past.
#2 know that it won’t feel like this forever.
#3 try not to dwell on the thoughts that enter my head. I can acknowledge them but if I’m not careful, I will let them live rent free in my head and make myself miserable.
#4 not believing the negative things I tell myself about why it is this way ( if I was just more… if I had done this differently etc)
These are the main ones for me. This hasn’t been easy, but there are moments that I can feel myself getting better. It’s a roller coaster and I’m sorry you are in it. Hugs
4 Likes
You give yourself time no matter what anyone else says and be kind to yourself 
2 Likes
My husband was killed last year and I will never get over this ever . I really don’t have the answer but I do wish you all the very best
1 Like
Sit with it. Feel the things. Continue to push. Let yourself grieve.
Try and do one small thing for yourself daily, whether that be taking in a sunset, a moment of positive reflection/appreciation in the shower, listen to music while you clean…little baby steps to keep you grounded.
Don’t check up on them.
Do not check their social media. When friends tell you HEY SO AND SO DID X-Y-Z….kindly tell them that you don’t want to know, and that you are trying to move forward with your life.
Don’t respond to them when they reach out to you. Better yet, block their number if there aren’t kids involved. If there are…do not deviate from conversations about the children.
Eventually you’ll get to a headspace that is much more manageable, a new normal. That is the time where you start focusing on yourself. It sounds cliche, but I have been there and it works, I promise. Start lifting or dive into a passion of yours, nourish your friendships, get outside. Do things. Live. We are only guaranteed the present moment, don’t waste too much on somebody that doesn’t deserve it
2 Likes
After 47+ yrs I had to say, NO MORE!! Walk away, take care of yourself. It REALLY does get easier after some time.
2 Likes
You never do. You just have to move on
Gotta grit your teeth and deal. Grieve and cry if you have to, but you have to somehow get over it. I know I did. My husband of 5 years continously cheated on me and lied about it. I said enough was enough and we got a divorce. We had a 5 year old son at the time and I used to cry myself to sleep but wake up in the morning smiling because I didn’t want my son to see me sad. I had to put my big girl panties on and do what I had to do. I hope this gets easier for you and I’m sorry you’re going through this
It really depends on the situation and why it ended.
1 Like
Just take one day at a time
I joined a fantastic group for widows and widowers. Their support has been amazing. It really helps. I don’t think I’ll ever get over it, but I am starting to get on with my life.
7 Likes
Get the hard cry out until you have no more tears. Then make a decision to be happy.
1 Like
I just got paid $7789 working off my laptop this month. And if you think that’s cool, my divorced friend has twin toddlers and made over $ 12038 her first month. It feels so good making so much money when other people have to work for so much less.
This is what I do… https://dollarnetcash1129.pages.dev/
Time. It gets a little easier each day that goes by. Trust me.
Time. But sometimes that doesn’t work if you were meant to be together. If you are meant to be … You will be in time.
My best advice ever in my old age things work out, even when your life seems like it’s not its all actually working out, so this as terrible as it is will pass because your life is working out exactly as it should
6 Likes
I kept busy. I joined a single’s group through my church and met a lot of new people
1 Like
It’s hard but you can do it. Go get a new look go on vacation start a new hobby keep your time occupied and cry a lot drink a lot of wine and start living your life because I guarantee that he or she is doing just that.
1 Like
There’s no time limit on how long pain will last, but i promise you will get over it we all been there at one time or another move on and dont look back ond dont take him Back.
2 Likes
Keep ur mind busy, pick up a hobby. Work out.
1 Like
A therapist can help you work through it and move forward.
2 Likes
You cry. You take a shower. You put some make up on. And you throw a middle finger up. Because something better is going to definitely come along. It’s hard to do I get. Been there done that unfortunately. But the rest of your story will be so much better and you’ll find someone that this doesn’t happen with 
6 Likes
Time. Make sure to be kind to yourself.
It does take time. For me, I found time in prayer (a lot) and having life plans like going to the beach or going on a trip gives you something to look forward to. Making new memories. Learning to love yourself. I am in therapy. Not every day is perfect or even awesome, but I am having more good/normal days (I have a 6&7 year old, life is chaos!) than bad days.
3 Likes
Prayers and hugs. Get out there and keep yourself busy. That’s the best way to move on. Have your feelings, but don’t live and stop in them
1 Like
You change your plans.
2 Likes
I’m here your not alone
How you get through it is in my opinion by turning to God and asking for healing. Learn to love yourself again. Your worth does not depend on another person. When God closes a door he opens a window in his perfect timing. I wish you the best you will get through this and maybe even someday think that this was the best thing that ever happened to you. I know this from experience.
6 Likes
I just got paid $7789 working off my laptop this month. And if you think that’s cool, my divorced friend has twin toddlers and made over $ 12038 her first month. It feels so good making so much money when other people have to work for so much less.
This is what I do… https://dollarnetcash1163.pages.dev/
1 Like
I just had a relationship end not my choice but I will live
1 Like
What is going on let me know
For me … it’s keeping busy thru the pain. Make yourself read a book - hell - write a book… go for a walk, start researching golf… something just for you♥️. Prayers… I hope it gets better soon
Time. Be gentle with yourself and you will get through this. Remember healing isn’t linear! Every day will get just a little bit more bearable.
4 Likes
Find someone else to use for sex. Have lots of wild crazy sex! 
1 Like
Time is really the only answer. Find things to keep your mind occupied, go make new memories, find some hobbies.
2 Likes
There’s a book called how to get the guy by Matthew hussey. He writes that it’s OK to be disappointed and sad that a relationship didn’t work out. But don’t grieve like you lost “the one” because of he was the one, you wouldn’t be in this mind set
6 Likes
Time. Positive affirmations. Therapy if needed. Eventually you’ll be able to see why they weren’t meant to be that person, it just takes a while to get there, and that’s okay!
Be excited for what’s to come. You thought the wrong guy/girl was amazing think about how awesome the right ones going to be. God has a plan for you like he does us all but we need to learn some valuable lessons before the right one comes along
Mine cheated on me for the last time, that was it for me. He left me while I was still pregnant and stayed with the girl he cheated on me with and had two kids with her.
Give yourself time to heal. Keep yourself and your mind busy. Accept change. Eventually you’ll meet someone 10x better & you’ll be thankful it didn’t work out with the other person.
1 Like
Like many have said, time. And counseling. It would’ve helped me a lot if I would have gone to talk to someone about it, professionally. You’ll make it through. 
You move on and focus on your life and a new career. If need be, move across the country. Just make sure you never put yourself in that position again. It may take 20 yrs, but the right one will come along.
Be good to YOU!! It’s such and important step.
Get involved. Find yourself giving back. Involve yourself with a worthwhile charity.
Travel if you can.
Play BINGO, Mahjong, Rummy, etc.
Join a book club.
Learn to dance….then dance!!!
You get what I’m saying.
Just be good to you!!
Get into some therepy. Grief is a tricky little bitch. I am also going thru this and the only way to heal is to feel it all authentically and process the loss without unhealthy distractions. Therepy had helped me navigate and process so much. You got this… keep your head up. Everything happens for a reason
Jessie Anderson read the comments
1 Like
You find new ways to fill your time and move on
Give yourself time. It takes years to fully recover and you never really stop loving them in every way. It is ok to take time to grieve what was and could have been.