If hes attacking you with you just talking…walk away.
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I’d leave with my kid. I don’t do belittling crap
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Stay out of it. Worry about you and your child.
I wouldn’t put up with it. And show him how serious you are. It’s easy to say leave him but it’s not that easy when sometimes you aren’t able to because of money etc. this is obviously a huge deal and what makes it the big deal is him not the baby mom. I would let give him an ultimatum if he’s speaking to you like that in front of his son then his son will see that behavior and do the same to you when he’s older if not sooner. Don’t put up with it. If you’re lucky enough to take care of you and your child alone for a while to let him know how serious you are you need to. Something drastic needs to be done or nothing will change.
That’s unacceptable. You need to leave. He obviously does not respect you at all.
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Court orders are for both parents and kids
If they are going to change things diffrent from the court orders then yes they need to go and change it as if he has his son even if they agree and she changes her mind then she can get him for kid napping (not to say that will happen but that’s one of many things that can happen)
And with child support that is up to him but all it is is a phone call to say that you have him more so they will change it
As for rules at your house his dad needs to say our house has one set of rules and mums house has another set of rules just remember you have a 2 year old that is going to copy and want to he like big brother so I think you as a mum and step mum need to lay down what you will or will not stand for as you have to live there too
But remember dad is most likely feeling like if his house has rules his son may not want to come and all dad wants is to see his son so just keep that in mind I don’t think it is you as such
Leave the relationship, is my advice…
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He should back you up and respect you/your opinion. You are a huge part of his sons life and his son and your other child need to see you respecting each other/backing one another up. If he can’t do that then looks like he will have two BMs.
Sit down and shut up !!! It’s not your child to discipline not your place to say how much he should or should not be paying! You married him knowing he had a child! Know your lane. Being a single mom is not easy and 100$ a week isn’t even enough to feed a growing boy anyhow! Pay you 
for having a child she’s been raising!?!? Alone while you have a two income household you’re the problem not the baby mother or the kid you and your husband are the problem. Fix the way you think and consider how hard it is to be a single parent! Be grateful and appreciate the time you get with him rather then complain to strangers!!!
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Just look after your child let your husband look after his son don’t do a dam thing for him if your husband expects you to look after his son then he has to accept you input
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You go to visit your family on the weekends and let him deal with his son keeping him up all night then he’ll see how it’s affecting the rest of the family.
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Blood is thicker than water💧
yes excatly ifhegoing to talk t yu like that in front of hisson,go away for the weekend he there and see how it turns out fo him.he a bitrude a nd ignortant towards yu .
If they’re going to start sharing custody, then no one may owe the other child support. That’s up to a judge.
There is a deeper issue here and it’s called respect and he obviously doesn’t respect you and this issue can’t be the first time he displayed his disrespect, do what’s right for you and your child cause for me any child under my roof IDC who they momma or daddy is is gonna follow my rules.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How do you handle being a step parent? - Mamas Uncut
Make it clear that you are trying to help. But a child from a previous relationship can be a touchy subject. Unless you are welcomed completely to be a parent to the child, it’s best that you know your boundaries with the child. Let him do the disciplining and dealing with the child’s mother. If he doesn’t want you to have a say, he needs to be responsible for all aspects. This is how it would be anyway if you were not in the picture.
As far as the child support goes, again…touchy subject. I understand what you are saying about having a review done on child support based on time spent. But if they are equally splitting time, mom may not be paying him.
When it comes to how he talks to you, that’s unacceptable. He’s teaching his son that it’s ok to disrespect the mother of his children.
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Difficult conversations, disagreements, should not involve you being belittled and disrespected. The disagreement is one thing but the treatment you are enduring during that disagreement is toxic. I would think about couples counseling for communication and what you do and do not want to welcome into your relationship and family life. Good luck Mama 
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If the parenting plan is currently 4 days out of the month, and being changed to 14… the child support needs to be altered because you essentially have him 50/50 now, but I don’t think she would be paying him. As for the parenting differences, I’d recommend family counseling if youve been given an active role in the childs life, if not then you need to step back and let him handle his son and his sons mother by himself.
The belittling and name calling needs to stop, or you need to accept that your children will grow up thinking it’s ok to be treated like that, and to treat others that way.
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Girl my best advice is leave I dealt with trying to be the step mom for 7 years now it’s hard as hell. I have a 2 year old with my guy but hes got 4 other kids his 2 boys live with him. Them boys have made my life hell they was 8 and 10 when I meet them. I can’t say anything about them or there mom’s without it causing a huge fight 7 years later and I’m just tired. I can’t even stand to be around his kids there so disrespectful towards me but there dad don’t see it.
Bye bye is what I would do
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Your husband is disrespecting you … your a team you say, but it sounds like it’s only you, rules need to be told to his son, not from you but his father like time for bed and other rules you have in your home … good luck and hope he gets on your team as parents or a stepmom…
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A step parent has a difficult job but being the parent that has the main responsibility of looking after a child on their own is harder. I’d advise to let mum and dad sort it out themselves and give that mum some slack and try to see things from her perspective.
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To add to the advice you already have…my children have a step mom and a step dad… i will say in all these years these things stay between the kids dad and I. Your concerns are valid so I would look into counseling to figure out a common ground or… leave him 
. It’s a hard place to be in. Not much you can do outside of that. I’m sorry.
Maybe have your husband go back to court and try for 50/50. I know here in my state they try really hard to do the 50/50 shared parenting. Its really better for the child.
It will never get better. If he feels that way no matter what facts you state or use he will always thinks it’s against his son he will always feel that way. My stepson is 28 and it’s never changed. Good luck!
As far as child support, some/most courts have it to where the child stays more in the summer…this does not change child support. If that is not in the papers, then maybe y’all could work something out. As far as behavior, I would step back and let him handle it…but, yes talk to him about it. Overall, choose your battles.
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Your opinion doesn’t matter, by the sound of it. You’ll be fighting your husband, stepson and his mum. Good luck. 
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Sorry sweetie, your opinion really doesn’t matter when is about child support, and on top of that it’s jus 100 a week??? how pathetic you can be to fight over 100 a week when is for a child??? my ex husband used to give to his ex 300 a week and i used take care of the deposits to make them on time so his son and his ex would have the money every week. You can help to raise the child, financially is not your business. Telling you this as a stepmother for almost 11 years.
Either leave or leave the parenting to him. Fucked up I know but I gave up that fight a long time ago. I’m there if they need me but I got tired of hearing it all.
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Get a script for Xanax 
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I agree with Diana Reeves. But I also agree to with the belittling that’s disrespectful verbal and mental abuse and thats teaching his son that he can do that. Also its not good for your 2yr old. I would recommend you and him sitting down and talking and tell him that either he starts setting rules and making his son stick to them or your taking the 2yr old and leaving. He should understand that you are only trying to help and it’s not the way you want to raise your child. And if theres gonna be rules for the child you and him have together then his son should follow the rules at your house. And if your left in charge if him when your husband isn’t there. And you discipline him your husband should not get mad at you thats your house to…
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I’d leave…any man tell me shut the f up is not worthy of being my man.
You should all work together for the sake of the child. 50/50 joint custody should eliminate the need for anyone to pay child support. Both parents are then supporting the child when he is with them. Children need rules and boundaries which should be enforced and respected by all parties involved. It doesn’t have to be a fight all the time.
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Join a step mom group on fb!
I think youre being fair , and if you have set rules for your household then they should be respected , if you are applying the rules to your child then the other child is no exception and should not get better treatment vise versa , I think your husband is being immature and disrespectful and childish to keep saying you have a problem with his kid when all youre trying to do is stick to the rules and be fair , my conclusion is find a new husband who doesnt belittle you and disrespect you for trying to do whats right. Hes the problem not the kid .
You need to step up. Clearly, you are trying. For peace, I would leave him with the 10 year old and focus on my own kid. If you stay you will be teaching 2 children that it’s okay to be distracted by a man.
I think $400 a month in child support is a joke. I’m sure you know it’s costs more then $400 a month for you to raise your two year old as well. I wouldnt even be opening my mouth to complain about a man supporting his children step one.
You might not like how she is raising the son, you guys can do what you can on the 4 days out of the month you have to deal with it. Is it a fun time?? No, but it is what it is and the end of the day the 10 year old is also his son and it’s most between them. The 10 year old didn’t ask for any of it nor did the 2 year old and I’m sure he’s dealin best he can with all of it. They are kids in the middle.
And even if the schedule changes I think $400 a month is still more then fair. $800 a month to raise a kid is still a joke. I think you need to let it go and stop trying to micro manage all these details. You married the man and you knew he came divorced with a kid. You knew this would be something you would have to deal with…if you weren’t willing to do it…well…it’s too late but don’t take it out on the kids.
There’s my unpopular opinion of a child who grew up with a step parent who didn’t give a crap about them and made sure their life was hell from the moment they entered it because of things like this the adults in my life choose to put me though. It’s not about you all. It’s about the kids involved and their best interests.
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If the child is coming to your home every other week, child support should be stopped completely!
Your husband is truly being a douche about the situation!
One set of rules in your home for everyone!
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Does the child support come from your wages? Is your household struggling to get by? If you personally arent paying the CS, and your needs/the families needs are all being met…then the child support is his call… Personally it doesnt matter to me if i had my child 50% of the time…of i knew the other parent was struggling to cover basic expenses for the house i wouldnt reduce my payments to them when my child is in that home 1/2 the time… (Would you really want the kid not having food, electric, heat, or even just stability while with the other parent.) Should the other parent be able to provide those things without support…in a perfect world yes, but its not a perfect world and a parent should be thinking of the best interest of their child, not just what a court decides they have to pay… And yes im the parent that had full custody, my kid only went to dads every other weekend…only recieved $25 a month in child support…but when his fathers heat got shut off i took a years worth of support and went and paid his heat bill to make sure my child had heat when he visited his father…i could have kept my child home…but my child deserves to see his dad too.
As a step mom myself to three girls I say let his dad handle it. You worry about you’re guys child you have together and let him handle issues between his son and his sons mother. If the kid is out for summer break let up a little and let him be a kid. My kids get to stay up late on the weekends and during the summer. Trying to control every situation will only cause issues. I do agree if he’s getting more time and will have him the majority of the time now then he needs to have the child support reversed or modified.
I would leave! Your husband has no respect for you and no disregard for your opinions. He sounds like a total asshole. I am a stepmother of two, and I have two children, and we sat down when we moved in together and made sure that we were all on the same page with his ex. If he is now living with you I definitely would not be giving her any money. It sounds like you’re in a pretty toxic relationship. Being a stepmom is the hardest job in the world. From a mom’s perspective.
You do have a problem this is not something you can control, if he makes more money even if time is 50/50 he would still have to pay child support… so the child has the same living conditions at both house. Get over the Ex quit being bitter about what happened before you! Your husband has two kids, you are part of a blended family you knew what you signed up for!
Your husband is an idiot and a bad father, not to mention a bad husband. Nothing you say or do is going to change that. Get rid of him.
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Keep the 2 yr old…
Ditch the man that acts worse than a 2 yr old.
Abuse includes verbal abuse, minimizing your voice/feelings and insulting you in front of the children.
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I don’t think you and your husband should be having these talks in front of him. And maybe your husband should be showing his son some respect towards women! Can see your trying to help/guide your husband but maybe just leave it to mum and dad their responsibility just like your child’s yours. And it’s also your house and you have a right to set boundaries or the 10 year old boy will think he can walk all over you but if the same boundaries aren’t being set with his mum it sounds like it’s a losing battle. X x
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I agree with your husband in many ways. Before you started the problem I could read it. You DO have a problem with his son, period. How about I give you 100 and you hand over your baby so you’re not seeing it? How about you’re arguing over a child in front of a child? How about Id be surprised if the kid wanted to see you at all. You’re self oriented, get over it.
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I think the most concerning part of all of this is that it sounds like you guys have these conversations infront of your step son. Are these not conversations that can be had alone prior to your step son coming over? Your step son should not see you two arguing (or your daughter for that matter) though i realize that’s easier said then done at times. You and your husband have to agree on rules/bedtimes while your step son is in your home. But be gracious, it sounds like he lacks structure on a routine basis and that’s hard to change. I think you have a right to input, but ultimately that is his son and his feelings need to be respected too. Blending a family is so hard but can also be really rewarding. Keep striving for peace and compromise girl!
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Amount of child support has nothing to do with visitation…child support goes to parent with primary custody and is based off of income not visitation…he should be seeing his child more than 4 days a month and you think you should get paid for that?
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First of all 100 a week isn’t any kind of money for your step son and honestly u do have a problem with this child and your husband sees it careful u don’t end up single and running to the court for a hundred a week for your child smdh…its women like u who give step mothers a bad name
I don’t understand men and women u want the individual but not the children smdh a child is a responsibility for a lifetime or in some case until they are adults u can’t just wake up one day and say I don’t want him or her they didn’t ask to be born we created them stupessss.
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Thing is your not his oarent he is. You two are clearly not suited if your against each other rather then together. The boy is ten did you say therefore he not a baby. He having dad time may e your jealous because he spends all his time on the boy which he should so. He visiting not living with you.
I make the father right sorry. You can’t dictate there time together.
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You sound toxic not the dad.
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It’s simple.
1- put Jesus first over everything and everyone
2- put each other 2nd after Jesus (even above your kids)
3- everything else will work itself out.
These people talking about “it’s not your kid or your business” are wrong.
You don’t need advice from all these people, pick up the book of life for your answers. It’s all right there. And good luck
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If my opinion don’t matter I would leave… a husband should b there to listen & understand his wife & appreciate of the facts that u helping w his son even tho the kid ain’t ures & about the child support let him know that if he wants to keep giving that female free $ then he should go back to fucking her & to leave u da fuck lone
Children are collateral damage in a divorce. My best advice is, get along with the ex wife (mother of child) Then you have a better leaway of communication and can be a voice that is not your husband’s. It’s always about the children. The adults should act like adults and the only thing that should be priority is the child… They see and feel much more than we know. I’m a step parent… He’s 24 now and I was given the best advice when I got married. It is not about me or him or her… But the child. We know this coming into the relationship 
I’ve been a step parent since he was 2 years old.
Sounds like he should be paying child support for 2 kids if he’s belittling you
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Consider getting a divorce?
This guy is a jerk. Your household should not supplement your step-sons mother, when your step-son is living mainly in your household, end of story.
That’s his son he needs to reprimand his son, not you his step-mother.
He has no right to disrespect you in front of his son. If his own father doesn’t respect his step-mom, why should he respect his step-mom is the example your husband is setting for the boy.
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There is a lot going on here. Not knowing your full situation beyond what you posted, I’m going to make some leaps, so if I get anything wrong, I apologize and please just discard it. Your opening sentence indicates to me that you do not respect the mother of your step child. If that is true, your stepchild likely senses that. Think on this… if someone showed your mother/caregiver little respect… would you respect them in return? I think it is important to point out that your (collective your) vision of what acceptable parenting is changes as the child ages. The best I can tell by what you wrote… you have experience parenting a 2 year old girl. That will be vastly different than parenting a 10 year old boy. All parents say stuff like… if that was my kid they’d never do x,y,z. Then your kid gets to that age and by that time you’ve learned to be more strategic in what battles you pick. Your vision of parenting also varies greatly depending on the number of kids you have. It doesn’t seem like you view this boy as your own? So your perspective comes across as you are a parent of one with an occasional addition to your household. Your husband no doubt sees himself as a parent of two kids. There are vastly different perspectives/approaches for parents of one kid vs multiple kids. That might be a stretch but I think it worth mulling over. About child support… The intent of child support is so that the kids do not live like a prince at one house and a pauper at the other. It is to make each household a level financial playing field so it is not a competition and (my last most important point) in the best interest of the child. How much best interest of the child is worth the stress of court for $100/month? That is not a judgment question more of a thing to ponder… is the emotional cost to you, your husband, your kid, your stepson, your stepson’s mom truly worth it and is it in the best interest of the child or in the best interest of you? In the best interest of the 10 year old child seems to be entirely missing from your post. It seems to be all about your hardships. Being a good stepparent is going to call on you to rise to the occasion. My suggestion… go to couple counseling with your husband. Verbal abuse is never ok. Work together to make this better rather than continuing to rip each other apart. I’d also suggest setting aside your differences with the mom of your stepchild and figure out how to best co-parent this 10 year old boy who has no control in this situation and probably feels lost and helpless…in the best interest of your daughter and your stepson. The tension is not good for anybody but especially them. If your stepson’s mom won’t work with you… you and your husband can maybe take that up with a therapist for guidance on how to navigate that… in the best interest of the child.
Far more concerned about the husband verbally abusive behavior. Perhaps you should focus on how to leave a abusive relationship?
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Broken families can easily cause broken children
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If you’re not going to leave your husband then you might as well just tuck your tail and avoid everyone when the son comes over. Because if his father doesn’t believe in structure then why bother. As for the child support. You obviously don’t have a clue how it works. Him keeping the son half of the month would cancel out child support for both parties since they both have him the same amount of time. They will not have you pay her for the weeks that she has him then make her pay for the weeks that his father has him. Then the fact that he belittled you in front of the son shows his son that your opinion doesn’t matter so he isn’t going to mind you anyway. Why would he respect you as a parent figure if his father doesn’t?
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Sounds like your jealous
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Take care of your kid and MYOB about the child that isn’t yours!
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First this whole thing sounds like a really difficult situation, I am sorry you are going through it. Second based off my Pennsylvania experience which might be different than other states… support is based off of time spent and income of ex-spouses. Basically even if time spent in each household is exactly equal if the income isn’t, the higher income earner will pay in some support. Third no one should disrespect you in front of your children or step-children…that being said your husband may feel attacked and pressured but even so that gives him no right to speak to you as if you are beneath him. An opinion shared and communicated is completely different and welcome. You need to strictly establish boundaries as to how to have a productive conversation so that any children around are indirectly taught how to treat their future partners. If anyone ever told me to shut the fuck up especially in front of a child mine or not they’d be sent on their way with a reminder to not let the door hit them in the ass on the way out.
Our children were all over 18 when we got together but we still had to blend our families. The only thing I could figure out was to treat them all the exact same. They all made it really easy and they get along with each other and with us so well. Somehow it worked.
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The care. Of the. Boy is his and the child’s mothers business. You should set up guideiines for your house , let him handle the dicipline and arrangements for his child. Going to court over this will cost you more than paying the $400 per month. If. Either of the child’s parents want to raise him with rules and guidelines, I don’t know what you can do but leave or tolerate the. Video game s as long as he’s not. Hurting your. 2 yo. Sorry. But you cannot make him change . If he won’t work with you on setting up routines and guidelines , and belittles you , your hands are tied and it will affect your own child too. You might try counseling if he will go but otherwise you have a choice thst you need to make.
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Well first off just because he pays child support doesn’t mean she will depends on income for both parents. The court “if granted 1 week her 1 week him” they could probably consider it even and no child support will need to be paid depending on what state you’re in. I agree with you on the rules and if he doesn’t agree with you than he needs to care for his child on his own and don’t expect you to handle him.
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The problem is your husband. It’s easier to say you have a problem with his son rather than for him to uphold boundaries and discipline and God forbid address his ex. You are supposed to love them as your own and finance them as your own but don’t you dare try to parent…its 5 pounds of hypocrisy stuffed in a 3 gallon bucket. As for the verbal abuse…get out now!
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You shouldn’t be talking about any of this in front of any of the kids. This is not a kid discussion. If you talk bad about his mother to him or in front of him, he will not have any respect for you. No matter if YOU think her parenting is bad that’s his mother you can never replace her. If it’s that bad you should report to DHS, if not mind your own this was happening before you came in the picture. Maybe you and your baby daddy don’t have a good relationship and your jelious? Idk either way mind your own.
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Ask your husband if he would except that your daughter do all the same things his son is doing. Ask him would HE except another person, grandparents aunties uncles friends or babysitters setting boundaries for his son whilst the boy is in their care/house. This child is 10yrs old not an adult he does not rule you or your household. Tell your husband that if this is how it’s always going to be then you and your daughter live separately, he can also pay you child support and have visitation to your daughter. NEVER argue in front of the son about the son, this is just simply NOT ON.
I DONT think by your post that you have a problem with your husband’s son but I do see your daughter doing the exact same thing to you when she is older. Absolutely disrespectful on your husbands side to be giving you no rights to how he is treating you surrounding his son. Kids learn to manipulate early and dad of the year is giving that boy some whole hearted lessons with you being on the receiving end. I have six children.
I’ve been in this exact same scenario before myself, no it isn’t easy. Do NOT assist the father in anyway in the daily care of his son, do not wash clothes, or look after his son while dad is at work ect. If you have no rights surrounding the son in WhAts supposed to be your home as well then take absolutely no responsibility for the son. Not you circus not YOUR monkeys.
As for child support there is nowhere in your post that says the mother should be paying you so the person who said something in reference to this needs a lesson on how to read.
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It’s none of your business.
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Get your child out of that toxic environment.
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Tell that disrespectful fool to kick rocks and take his kid and baby mama with him. Who sticks around to be treated that way??
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They won’t pay you, but they would lower his payments to her.
As for the video game issue I get it, it’s annoying to a kid in a messed up routine and as result has caught an attitude, but by the sounds of it his dad doesn’t mind. Because he doesn’t mind, I would just leave him to it and leave it up to him to deal with the tantrums and the late night aftermaths. If asks for your help or assistance just tell him you did as he asked and “shut the fuck up about it” and his son isn’t your problem as he has made clear all the times you tried to intervene.
He shouldn’t be talking to you like that in front of your children either, if that was me I would hop, skipped and jump kicked that POS in the bin.
So there, in my opinion, is your two options.
Honestly, he needs to step up and put his foot down. The mother should not be receiving child support if things reversed and you are now the primary caregivers. Someone else said it best- stepparents are second class citizens. Like, love my kids and help support them but don’t dare have an opinion or tell me how to raise them. It’s ridiculous. The two of you are a team and whether he wants to have accountability; this does affect & concern you. It is also your finances and your home. If he wants to place his son and baby mama on some type of pedestal then I’d take yours and get out because obviously he doesn’t value yous the same.
That’s not how child support works… I do agree with the others if he’s not willing to hear you out and belittles you it’s probably best to get out of there.
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It doesn’t sound like a hard to deal with baby mama, as much as you have a shit husband.
She doesn’t seem to be the problem here.
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Does he earn more the BM cos going 50/50 wouldn’t mean she’d pay you… How did you even get that?
Why are you bring things up in front of his son? That’s wrong and I’d tell you to stfu too
Sounds like he’s sick of you nagging him to me
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Leave! He has no respect😡
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I don’t think you’re off base at all. My boyfriend has 4 kids and according to the courts we have them half time but in reality, we have them 90% of the time. She just recently had CPS tell her she can’t have the kids at all, then it was she could have them during the day but no sleepovers and then just as of last week she was allowed to have them overnight. This is due to her and her husband having continuous domestic disputes to the point where kids were in the basement holding knives to protect themselves. It’s a very sad situation for these kids and we try to make our home as easy going (but still with responsibilities and respect) and structured as possible. Right now no one is paying child support bc its ‘even’ according to the courts but we pay for everything. It would be extremely helpful for her to pay something to help us out. 3 boys-2 preteens and a teen and a 3 yr old girl. $100 a week would go purely to food only lol. I wish you luck in handling that. It can’t be easy when your husband talks to you that way when you’re expressing how you feel/concerns.
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LEAVE…have you considered why he split up with his ex?? Pretty sure you are seeing it first hand. Maybe the thought of paying TWO lots of child support might make him more reasonable…but I doubt that very much.
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I am in a very similar situation uuffff!! It is NOT easy… if we ever break up. I will NOT date a guy with small children… nope. Nope… nope… it’s too much drama and stress. And oohhh how I hate that, you have a problem with my son line 
nooo I have a problem with YOU not paying attention and letting him do whatever 
This is not his ex problem… this is not his son is the problem… This is your hubby is a problem … From what you said you do seem to have an issue with anything & everything to do with the kid. But I’m not there, don’t know the whole… But I do know sh!tty step moms, who see an issue with the step kid no matter… But your complaints & all… All boil down to the person who is the issue , even if you are a bad step mom, is the man you’re with. But you’re not gonna do nothing, but think the ex is an issue, the kid is an issue. And the fact that he treats you like crap, deserved or not… Y’all put up with too much just to say you have a "man"
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Unless his son is permanently coming to live with you, just leave the child support payments alone. Idk what state your in but in NY you can be taken every 2 years for increases, so you may want to be careful about what you start with that . Also seems your husband disagrees, he feels you have a problem with his child… work on that instead.
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His child, his Money … leave before he starts abusing you. The 1st time he son comes for the week, You go
if he has the chd week on week off yhen child support should be cut off ? she shouldnt have to pay either. Why would u even worry about trying to gouge the mother if u guys are splitting.
That’s not how child support works.
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I would stay out of it,his kid,let him decide,fighting in front of the kids is no good
Thats not how it works, especially if it’s in the court papers like that. For instance, my ex pays chikd support, gets the kids every other weekend and Wednesday evenings. He also gets 6 weeks during the summer of visitation. Even if they are there for those 6 weeks (which has never happened yet) he still has to pay regular child support. They won’t reverse the child support, unless the actual custody agreement changes like if his son actually lives with you 2 weeks each month, but even then, if the husband makes significantly more than the mom, he would still have to pay child support.
I know when my ex husband had his children for a week at a time he did not have to pay child support. The court actually said she would have to pay him monthly, but he told them no, that if they are splitting custody then neither one of them should have to pay.
I also split custody with my sons father and didn’t receive child support (in PA)
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Take your 2yr old and get the hell out of that toxic dynamic.
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I honestly would just wait until the children are in bed and just simple talk to him. Calm like explain your concern. Y’all are a team it is you and him. And I hope you two are not fighting around that baby that isn’t fare to them…
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Pack your bags & take your child’s & go
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You need to have a sit down before the child comes and these are good enough reason to ask for custody remind him this is not mentally well on a child to not have structure
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I’m a parent of 6 3 mine 3 his we parent discipline the same we talked about it before we married
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Just leave honestly. I am a bonus mom of 3, double bonus to 1 and bio to 5. We have custody of all 9 kids. However this doesnt stop my husband’s ex from stalking, harassing etc even tho she has a court ordered permanent protection order against her. It takes alot to be a parent in general but even more to be a bonus parent. The most important thing is ur both on the same page and sounds like ur husband isnt willing to do that. If he starts getting every other week most the time child support is cancelled and neither side pays as they are getting equal time.
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If anything it would switch to him paying less, not her paying you guys. I’d be a little put off if thats the first thing you said when I brought up wanting my kid over more often.
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