How do you move on from your husband cheating?

How do you move on from your husband cheating? I want to be with him and have chose to forgive but I still can’t get some things out of my head.

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How do you move on from your husband cheating?

Counseling. But honestly, when I gave my ex husband a second chance before we got married, all I did was stress. Wonder who he was with, who he was talking to, where he was going. Then I found out he cheated 2 years into our marriage so I divorced his ass.

You move on from your husband cheating by moving on from your husband.

You can forgive it, but you’ll never forget it. It’ll always be in the back of your mind.

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If you are set on trying to repair then it takes time and maybe try marriage counseling

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You throw the whole husband away.

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Lots of work. Its not easy. If both of you truly want it, you can over come it. You will never forget, but you can overcome it

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What I did was we went to therapy and worked out somethings that were needed and learned how to communicate with each other the right way. Neither of us were listening to the other. Mind you there’s still some minor things to work on but no one is perfect we are all human. We have however been together for 21 yrs and married almost 20 years now. You just have to learn what works for you.

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I personally don’t think you do, there will always be them things you can’t get over in your head. Your heart choose forgiveness but your mind will always have doubts. He broke your trust and trust is a very hard thing to give back freely. Can it still work absolutely, as time goes by your mind will maybe follow your heart, but things will always be different. Best of luck to you :two_hearts:

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You move on from your husband. :woman_shrugging:t2:

Shouldn’t be second or third chances. Cheaters always cheat.

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You can’t. It will always be in your head

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From my experience, after you forgive and then as soon as you find the last ounce of will in your soul to finally move past it, he’ll do it again. You may as well spend the energy moving on to a man who finds the value in you in the first place.

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The relationship will never be the same, the idea of him with another woman will stay with you forever, for now on you will think that he is always lying to you even if he is saying the true .
You can forget him but you will never forgive him.

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Cheaters will always cheat. Move on to bigger and better things. It’s a trust that was broken & you’ll always have that in your mind

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It will always haunt you for the rest of ur life

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A lot of work and counseling.

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Couples counciling, I personally think that it would be too hard to do it on your own.

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You can forgive,and move one, but it’ll never be out of your mind. Those thoughts will always be there unfortunately. You simply have to decide if it’s worth it to you.

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It’s normal! You forgive but can’t forget!

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Girl. Dont forgive. It will eat you alive every single fuckiN day :pensive:. Best of luck

Once the trust is broken it will never be the same again!! I know from personal experiences

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Lots of conversations, sometimes the spouse has to give details. Trust takes time. If you can’t get past it, probably time for another decision.

Short answer is you don’t!!! You either leave and move on, or find ways to accept it and try to work on it

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You leave and don’t look back

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You don’t. You can say your forgive him but you never really do and it’s ALWAYS in the back of your mind. That’s why I’m divorced. :purple_heart:

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I don’t think you can. You’ll never fully trust him again

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You move on by leaving and finding your happiness because as long as you stay it will always be in the back of your mind.

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Find a new one. :tipping_hand_woman:

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You can’t, you’ll never trust again, every time he’s gone you will wonder ….

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You can’t… you won’t be able to trust him again

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You can’t. It literally will stick with you forever.

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Once he broke your trust there is no getting it back. Move on and be with someone who loves you enough to be with only you.

There’s a difference between forgiveness and forgetting. You can forgive the act, but you’ll never forget. This is a question only you can answer unfortunately. Maybe marriage counseling would help. Best of luck.

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You don’t. Once a cheater, always a cheater.

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Sending you strength to do whatever you desire :heart:

You’re a better woman than I am, Honey. My exes, plural, saw fit to replace me. All I ever did was work, try to make a home, and raise children. But there was always greener grass on the other side of the fence. I will grant you I had trouble keeping my weight down. And I would get upset when they blew money on activities that didn’t help the whole family. One spent so much time away from home, then was so nasty when he was home… it was better when he was out. But I found out ex 1 was quite the playboy. And I guess that was just his style. Ex 2 found a pancake waitress and Amway customer more appealing. I gave up. Forgiveness has little to do with it. Can you get over the hurt and feelings of betrayal? That’s the question. I couldn’t. So I moved on.

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Lots of therapy. Living with zero trust, triggers for years s d years.

You have to decide what you can live with.

I don’t think you ever can to be honest, at least I couldn’t.

Consistency and communication. Its absolutely possibly but it takes a lot of work and a lot of time. Forgiveness doesn’t happen overnight

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It can be done you and him will just have to work on its not impossible its gonna take a lot of effort for the both of you and you both have to be all in

I couldn’t…I have no words of advice I’m afraid. That’s 1 thing among a couple of others that are absolutely a deal breaker.

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The only way you can even remotely start to heal is if he an 100% an open book from here on out. No secrets, no phone privacy, supportive through the triggers, allows you to vent and cry about how you are feeling without getting angry or making you feel bad, maybe even an app like Life360 to bring you peace of mind.

Counseling/professional help for you and the relationship.

If you’ve chosen to stay this time, just remember once is a mistake, more than one time is a choice and you need to remember your worth.

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Divorce him once a cheater always will be

Leave his ass u don’t need some big pig like that

You never will forget what he did

You don’t and won’t. You will always think about it. It’s better to leave.

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Counseling/therapy, for you and for y’all.

You may feel the same, you may heal and decide to move on. Regardless, you need someone to help you process what happened.

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You never so. Boot him to the curb. Once a cheater alwYs a cheater. They never change.

I wouldn’t I would just leave and move on

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Been there …it never goes away

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After cheating on me. He cheated on others.

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Mine cheated so I left him for a woman…

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Adultery is a challenge to overcome. And it is something that the Bible has a clear rule about. You don’t have to settle for staying as it’s apt to happen again.
(Matthew 19:9) and abuse (Exodus 21:10-11)

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Sean Cox these comments

If your strong enough and you want it to work and you want the marriage to work and if he fully regrets what he has done and is remorseful if he is acting like it’s no big deal than no point trying to work it out

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When my ex cheated on me . I couldn’t move past it. So we got divorced… in the end you gotta figure out if you can or not

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If your BOTH willing to put in the work, it may be possible. Your always going to think of it, especially when things happen. Has he cut all communication with the person first? Does he want to work it out with you? He’s going to have to show you, so that you can earn that trust back.
If it’s constant thinking, do yourself a favor and walk away now, save yourself the torment before your self esteem is so low. Keep your chin up and you got this!!!

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I believe with lots of counseling it is possible. But trust will never be the same again. If you have kids maybe try to work it out but if you don’t I would honestly move on.

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Once the trust is gone… nothing will change that

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When my husband and I first started dating he cheated on me and I decided to forgive him for it. That was 16 years ago. Not going to lie for some damn reason it still crosses my mind at times. Not nearly as often anymore tho. But I wholeheartedly trust him today. He changed, people can change…but THEY have to want to.
Good luck with whatever decision you make, just know they CAN be faithful after cheating

You’ve chosen to forgive him. While it is important to remember and keep that your pledge, if you want your marriage to have a chance, that pledge doesn’t mean you’ll ever forget.

My ex wanted to stay married and keep his honeydo on the side. Yikes. Someone was kind enough to clue me in.

You may want to try a few counseling sessions to see if that can help. Your husband has to earn back your trust. Hopefully, he’s proving he can be faithful.

Good luck and my best wishes to you. This is going to be a seriously difficult time. Talking out your frustration with a marriage counselor may be the help you need.

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You have to love him enough and want it enough but understand this he has to love you enough and want it enough for the both of you to work on this I’m saying this because my husband cheated on me after 5 years of marriage it was hard I never forgot never got completely over it but we were married over 21 years when he passed away and I don’t regret staying with him ever

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Make sure you have asked all of your questions and are at peace with the answers, for better or worse, that way when you decide you are ready to move on you can. You’ll never completely forget but you might be able to move beyond it.

It never goes away. Once someone crosses that line, the relationship changes. There is no coming back from it unfortunately.

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You don’t. Relationship is dead already :face_vomiting:

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THE BIG QUESTION IS IS HE REMORSEFUL AND ASKING FOR FORGIVENESS
How did you find out by looking in his phone …because if you did that and that was how you caught him then he is only sorry because he got caught…he will also become better at hiding things now…do you know for sure he still isnt seeing her
Is he willing to go to marrriage counselling and get therapy to understand why he did what he did
Have you really sat down and communicated …because he needs to explain if he is unhappy what is missing in the marriage to make it better…if nothing changes the problems are still there and waiting to hapoen again…
Once trust is gone its realky hard to get it back if not ever…and you will never forget…
Look on utube there are videos on there to help you…

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If you cannot forget you cannot move on.

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Get my ass moving and don’t let it get to me

you might forgive but you will never forget

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Hell no. You can only hope you have real evidence so you can leave. Could be a blessing, there’s your out.

When my ex cheated the second time I moved out to my own apartment and that was the first good sleep I had in months. Never looked back either

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Don’t get in the way of him finding his true love :joy::joy:

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If he was sober when he did, you don’t because that relationship is dead. He was shopping and trying goods looking for his next…and just like any other dating, some he meets won’t work out so he’ll just stay with what he has until one does or he gives up.

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Your strong. Cuz nope. Lol. I’ll bring that shit up until I die,
betrayal if you forgive them it will certainly
happen aagin :slight_smile:

Idgaf if someone is married if u cheat once it will happen again, kick his Azz to the curb & him 2 kick rocks n move on with your life. If he really loved u or cared or whatever he would have never cheated

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I could never once a cheater always a cheater

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I never could. I tried. I divorced and moved on. I didnt give him a chance to do it again.

It will never not be in your head. And you feel so free when you leave and don’t need to focus on it anymore.

Its changed for life now you will never be the same

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You take it one day at a time. You have to truly forgive him. He has to prove his faithfulness. Eventually it gets easier. It’s been a little over 4 yrs sense my husband’s affair and we have gotten thru it. I do still have some days where I get mad or sad but not very often anymore but my husband has also made sure to fix what he broke. Will I ever fully forget no but it is possible to repair what was broke and move forward.

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I personally would never be able to trust him again… every trip to the grocery store, every text he receives… etc. It just wouldn’t work. Good luck :yellow_heart:

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So you haven’t forgiven if you can’t move on,best just to start afresh on your own and know your worth second time around

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Eventually you realize you will never be the only one for anyone. Life is not built that way. People and things pass. People love other lovers and it really just comes down to your own dreams and expectations. Expectations are dangerous especially if you think someone/anyone is going to stay in your life forever.

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Divorce… that’s how I move

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You will never get over it and never trust him again. Best to end it now and take time to heal and move on.

You don’t. You move on and find someone who doesn’t make you doubt your self worth.

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Well unless you guys both do some counseling together and separate you won’t move on. There will be before the affair and then after the affair. Neither of you can pretend it didn’t happen you will have to work really hard. Your partner will have to work extremely hard in therapy to fix themselves, accept and truly acknowledge their wrongdoing, and work with you as you work through it and work on trusting them again.

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Get a divorce. :worried: sorry that’s what I’d do

Im leavingggggg on a jet planeeeee

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Congrats on deciding to be a doormat…

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you divorce him & take all his money. that’s what i did. save your sanity. you deserve better.

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You never will,I know

You don’t. If you choose to stay you have to accept what happened happened and that it will never be the same. Not to say that it won’t be good or you won’t be able to trust him, but it will be different

Just throw the whole husband away and get a dog :woman_shrugging:t2: problem solved.

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You don’t. At least I dont think l ever could.

Throw the whole man away. Let the who*e have him. Walk away while you still have some dignity.

I tried with my ex husband. I couldn’t ever get passed it

The quickest way is to find a fling. Do you have a local plumber, mailman, or pool that comes with a boy? Is there a local bar? Find someone new, flirt, then fuck them. Bonus points if they’re nice, kind, and emotionally mature. The morning after, you could both go for brunch at a nice café and have an orange juice or a coffee. Date him for a while, while keeping in mind that you don’t really need him, but it’s nice to have company. Join a tennis group or social club. Cooking classes have always been on your mind - now you can make a killer souffle. Buy a sexy black dress and hit the club with your new friends from the tennis group. Men come and go of course, but you run into the first boy from the bar one day. The sparks are still there. You invite him back. He loves your souffle and you find you can do more with the tennis racquet than just hitting balls. You marry in the south of France. Wine is your life now, especially paired with cheese and sausage shaped bread. Your new children speak French - their accents are adorable. They crowd around you in your old age and bring you glasses of cab sav. Your grandchildren are - how you say - super cute? And as the sun sets and the sky turns to a pinkish salmon colour, you look out over the ocean blue with a little smile - satisfied and happy.

You don’t. It changes the dynamic. You resent them and never trust them again.

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First pack your bag … :school_satchel:

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