How do you trust again in a relationship?

I’ve been single around 6 months. After my husband cheated and we split up… Its been hard amd sometimes so bad I’ve wanted to curl up in a ball and just sleep… It took me months to be able to laugh and actually I’m much better now… The ex would harass me everywhere I went…I’m actually wanting to get out there and date… . How do I trust someone else again…

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How do you trust again in a relationship?

You need to fully heal yourself before dating again. The reason I say this is because if you don’t then the person you end up dating will be the one who has to deal with the emotional baggage cause of your ex husband cheating on you. So take some more time to yourself until you don’t have to ask the question how do I trust someone else again. Also before getting into a relationship again you should write a list down of what you expect and will never accept in a relationship and go from there. Don’t bring baggage into the next relationship cause it’ll never work sadly.

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Don’t trust instant relationships…take your time to get to know the other person…slow and easy

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I can tell you that I was in this position myself almost four years ago. I tried to start dating almost immediately because I needed to feel like there was nothing wrong with me. I came to realize that I needed to work on myself and that included being able to feel like I could trust a man again. I can say that I’ve been in a relationship with someone for almost a year and there are days I still have those trust issues, but they are quickly squashed because my guy is nothing like my ex. You’ll know when you are ready. But I suggest taking time to work on yourself both mentally and emotionally before you jump back into the dating game. Good luck sweetie, I wish nothing but the best for you​:hugs::heart:

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Continue to HEAL and don’t rush into another relationship. Begin to get connected back to YOU and the things YOU love. Some of those things may have changed… rediscover them.

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Therapy and only casual dating for fun, but there is no pressure. Take a bit to work on yourself and heal what’s been done to you. I hope your ex is no longer a problem for you, that couldn’t have been easy

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I get it, it’s hard to date and hope they won’t do the same to you because the ex broke your trust. But I’ve always trusted someone new until they gave me a reason not to, they weren’t the one who hurt you. Or disrespected you and if you don’t let go of the trust issues you’ll never have a serious relationship

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It’s not so much about being able to trust that someone will never betray you, it’s about trusting yourself enough to know you’ll be able to handle it even if they do. That’s where you start. Because at the end of the day, you really never know what someone else will do. You have to be able to rely on yourself. Good things will come❣️

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My husband cheated for years and was also physically and verbally abusive, It changes you.
Everything that happens to you in life changes you. Sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worst. They are all life lesson. I went to marriage counseling alone because he refused to , the one thing I learned This is the trust is earned.

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It’s not fair to yourself or anyone else, to jump into the dating pool without fully healing past heart break and or trauma. I’ve been single over 4 years for this reason. I’ve had ample opportunity to move on, but chose to work on myself for my kids and myself. It’s hard at first, but once you enjoy and are content in your own company, things all fall into place. Trust the process 🫶🏼

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Nothing out there but other people’s rejects.

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Not everyone is the same, and your next partner should not have to pay for your ex mistakes, if you are not ready to let that go and to start fresh , just take your time and do not rush into another relationship :blush:

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“Hurt people, hurt people”

Take your time, heal, when you are healed you won’t have to ask how to trust again.

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I was single for 6 years after me and my ex divorced I focused on my kids and out of no where my now fiancé came along (5 years now we’ve been together) I explained to him right off the bat everything my ex put me through and it took me a little over 2 years to build that trust with him fully he never gave me a reason not to trust him but I slowly built it up over time I was honest with him about everything and made sure he understood what he was getting into. Start off slowly and build it up from there the right person will understand.

You can not use what happened to you as to the reason why you can not trust again (I know easier said than done, but it’s not fair to carry over that feeling onto others when it was your husband that broke your trust not other people). Not everyone is going to hurt you. What you need to do is take this time to heal and understand why you needed to go through this journey. Find strength and know that what happened was because it needed to and you will be with the one who truly deserve you. This will only make you stronger. :heart: sending you love and strength. :heart:

Trust is earned over time. It goes both ways, the man needs to prove he is trustworthy and you have to prove you are able to trust (and vice versa). OVER TIME. For now, trust that you can’t trust anyone and refrain from wasting his time and yours.

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It takes time. As you see little things that the new person does, each action and movement adds a little trust as you get to know one another.

When you go into a new one, remember that it’s a new person who gets to earn that trust. They aren’t a reincarnation of your ex. Meaning, don’t bring the insecurities into the next one. Be cautious, as everyone should be with someone new.

Trust is earned through actions and repetitive actions. Trust is also lost through actions as well.

Hope this helps!

By understanding that you can’t stop someone from cheating, but to trust yourself to be strong enough if they do. Therapy helps too.

You need to take the time to heal first. I would say you’re not ready to date until then because it’s not fair to not trust someone who never wronged you. Its not the new person’s fault the last one cheated on you.

Trust is earned. Trust no one. You can start dating but don’t trust anyone until that’s earned and that will take some serious time.

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Take it slow!!! Do not get caught up in the sweet things he says! Watch what he does!!! Date 1 person at a time. Guard yourself and if you have kids, keep them out of it until you’re sure about this new person. Don’t make it public on fb until you’re in a relationship. Good luck!

Ask a potential partner to be upfront about past relationships. People who have a history of cheating, will almost always repeat the behavior.

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I would make sure I’m healed before starting to date again. You don’t want to project any triggers or fears onto your next relationship. But if you’re healed, maybe just go on dates and don’t commit to anything super fast. Don’t rush. It’s also not bad just to be content with this new season of being single and rediscovering yourself.

Do the work. What was it that kept you in that relationship. If you don’t get to the root of you then you’ll repeat the lesson.

You don’t… trust is earned… not just thrown around as a word. It’s actions

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