How has sports helped your kids?

I feel the same way… I have one child that’s a sports always on the go person… then I have one that just isnt into physical activity… I signed them both up for dance and after 2 lessons my daughter said nope… so I decided to do what interests her the most… she likes art… so I’ll be signing her up for that… and she likes to swim alot so I’m looking to get her into swim… if she’ll do it… I won’t force but I’ll try to enthusiastically talk her into it.

There is seriously more to life than sports. If the kid doesn’t want to play don’t force him. Help him find a hobby or what he is interested in…drama club, choir, scouts, art just to name a few options

Never push your child. How about pursing what interest them. I wasn’t and still not a sports kid :joy: I was more into the arts, reading and technology. Also allow the child to be well rounded. If you know all the stuff I know how to do man. My mom allowing me to be myself is what made me confident :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

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Nothing will make a kid hate something more than their parent forcing it on them “for their own good”

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Let him pick something himself, and if he can’t seem to find anything, sign him up for 4H, and then he’ll have a list to pick from, whether it be animals, sewing, baking, etc.
BUT, if it were me, I’d push him to finish what he started. I don’t know anything about soccer/football, but if the season isn’t over for the sport, then I would push him to finish the season. Teaches him valuable life skills about finishing what you started, getting through the hard bits, and being a team player. When the season is over, then he can pursue whatever interests him, and like I said, I’d he can’t find anything then sign him up for 4H🤷🏻‍♀️

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I was in mixed martial arts as a kid and it really helped me learn discipline and also helped me take out my anger in an appropriate setting but I also really wanted to learn the sport maybe sit him down to find out what best interests him because if he wants to do it he will do it well instead of have to do it

My kids played every sport they could Hockey, lacrosse, fastball, soccer. It was a lot of work. Sports for my kids built confidence created new friends, fostered leadership & team building skills. It gave them experiences you cant get doing anything else. It has been instrumental in moulding them into the incredible young people they have become.

There are other groups that can keep you physically fit and teach you the values and work ethic that sports does. Cadets, Boy Scouts, girl guides, And various others… maybe try and interest them in other group activities.

My children haven’t started school yet but I think I’ll push one activity a year doesn’t have to be a sport could be chess club for all I care but they will have to pick atleast one. Don’t like anything the schools offering? Okay we can volunteer at an animal shelter or go read to people in a nursing home.

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I think the big thing to look at is why your kid doesn’t want to, are they Interested in something else are they not having fun a 12 yrold is capable of telling you how they would like to spend some free time if it’s not something you agree find a compromise but honestly making a big deal about it seems silly to me :woman_shrugging:t2:

Find what else he likes to do or wants to do. Is he interested in music, art, or something else? If so let him do that. I know my son got worn out playing Little League and decided he didn’t want to anymore. I tried to force him but it didn’t work it just made parenting harder so I found that he was interested in the guitar. Guess what he took guitar lessons instead.

I was never pushed by my parents as a kid I loved athletics and sports that involve long jumps, hurdles, 100m races and 1500meter cross country, races and basket ball I done so many competitions with different schools in the area it was awesome I won many races I still have my medals lol and thanks to my mum who helped me train and run with me…

Then some friends used help me train this was from 11 til I was 15…

Weirdly I still have my running legs I’m 33 but I have been working since I was 17 I put my running shoes away x

You already know the ways sports help kids. You’re just looking for support to try and prove your point. Support his decision and encourage him to let you know what he’s interested in. Don’t let a lack of interest in sports create a divide with your child.

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Sports are great for so many reasons. My kiddos don’t have to play competitive but they do have to participate in something. My 9-yr old is on a competition gymnastics team. My 7-yr old does MMA and goes to tournaments. My 6-yr old does ballet and has started to ask for solos. Now my youngest two follow along their older siblings. Being on a team, learning how to work as a team, friendships, leadership….just to name a few. They also learn discipline and how to handle stress.

My kids have flourished since they were in sports. They’re hard working, kind, have made a bunch of friendships, they do better is school when they are in sports they are more respectful. I can’t list all of the things that sports are important for developing. I say tell your son he doesn’t have to do both but he needs to pick one or a different sport altogether. But maybe he doesn’t like sports so try something different? Keep him involved in things.

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Maybe let him do music, art, cooking, learn a trade, sports aren’t the end all be all. I have an athletic kid and artsy musical kid. Let them lead their own way.

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My eldest lad was a sporty child, my youngest was not.
He did do karate for a time and joined the gym last year.
I wouldn’t push. Encourage by all means but if your hearts not in something you won’t put your all into it. There’s something for everyone. Find out what his passions are and maybe build on those?

Team sports are very draining actually. They have benefits but also draw backs. Our 18 year old did team sports from the time he wanted (3 or 4 years old) until he graduated. He made some of his best friends in sports BUT has said for a long time he hates the organized sports (enjoys them for fun). He coaches out youngest (she is 6) in park board sports BUT never serious. It is always for fun. IF you force the sports, it is so much worse.

If he was already committed to a team, I would make him complete the season; when I was younger about that age I got a lazy bone and my Mom made me finish: I’m glad she did, I just needed a push.
If it’s a new season I’d let him quit , but tell him he needs to exercise still a certain amount of time per week
(Some kids just get lazy especially nowadays, bc if video games , etc)

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Maybe he’s done with team sports? Or has grown out of his teammates? As kids get older the pressure to perform can be overwhelming. You could try a new physical activity that has less team competition - swim lessons, and tennis lessons instead of a team sport come to mind. My son gave up team sports at 8 and loves swim. Pre pandemic he even join a swim team, but has gone back to just lessons. It really depends on why he no longer wants to participate.

Id tell them they could pick in activity they wanted but they couldn’t just do nothing. Theres all kinds of shyt to get into. Dance, computers, art, writing/reading, photography, science clubs etc depends what they like

By forcing him to do it, he’ll push back even more. My youngest son played baseball several years and then around 6th grade he said he didn’t want to do it anymore. I didn’t make him do it. Find him some other hobby to participate in but don’t force him to do something, his heart won’t be in it if it’s something he’s forced to do

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I haven’t personally but my nephew played football and soccer all throughout grade school when he hit middle school he took a year brake and did Choir and drama class he said he couldn’t do them if he was in sports cause the practice was the same time. He then went back to sports after the year brake.

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See if there is something else he wants to do.
Art, Theater, Writing, etc.

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I am not going to lie. I was that parent who pushed sports on my oldest son. He did it for a little while until he let it go. I wanted him to continue but thats not what he was interested in. Eventually he fell in love with theater :movie_camera: arts. He has participated in several plays and landed on TV :tv: for one of them. I was SO proud :sob: of him I cried. I had to give up my love for music/singing. Its like I was given the opportunity for my son to pursue his REAL dreams

Personally maybe its a stage they are going through. I used to think my son just didn’t wanted to do anything, but keeping in mind they’re going through their pre teen stage. They start liking different things.My son was so good in soccer but decided to no longer play but he is right now in karate and he loves it. Maybe ask him what else he would like to do. Find clubs, art classes, karate ect.

Mine is still young (going in 5th grade) but I’ve always left it up to him, and I’m glad I did. He has an amazing drawing skill and recently we have noticed that one of his ticks when he is nervous (he’s on the spectrum and has severe anxiety) is drumming on things, and I about dropped to the floor when I heard him in his room using his hands to drum on his desk. Actually I cried lol a couple of weeks ago he came to me asking about a handpan drum and I was so excited to hear that he too noticed his own ability. And it wasn’t even anything that was pushed or discussed, just something he does to calm himself

I think he could be at the age where they start to take the “fun” out of the sport and it becomes more about competition and pressure to be the best. My oldest son is 16. He absolutely loved football and basketball , played all of elementary and very little in middle school and by the time highschool came around he had lost his passion to play for the school. He enjoys playing outside of school with friends. I have some pretty negative feelings and opinions towards some school sports. While obviously it can keep them involved and engaged I feel it can be just as isolating if you’re not what or who “they” want on their team. I have three boys and a girl all in public school. I have started finding other activities outside of school for them. My middle boy loves dirt bike riding. They all live four wheels and riding. My girl is going into 8th grade and does volleyball but even last year she was starting to become disengaged regardless being a very good player she did not like what was supposed to be the “team” environment of it. I won’t ever push to be involved in something they find no joy in.

My twelve year old son doesn’t want to play sports either, and although at first it was kind of frustrating to me because he has so much energy all the time… now I try to get him interested in other things like band, he played trombone for two years and has now decided he isn’t interested in that. Kids will change their mind all the time on what interests them throughout their lives. I say support them and let them try many things, not just one certain type of thing. I do NOT believe that sports is the only activity that creates leadership skills, confidence or attracts more friends for them. There’s many other ways for them to get the exercise and interaction that they need. Good Luck Momma :relaxed:

I tell my kids it’s okay if they don’t want to do a sport but that if they committed to the season that they have to see that season through. I also tell them they have to be involved in something so if it isn’t a sport they need to join school clubs, pick up an instrument, or other hobbies and/or a job when they reach the appropriate age.

Maybe send him to the Youth center or like boys and girls club! He doesn’t HAVE to do sports to get good human interaction both of those programs will have different options that aren’t just sports

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Ask him why…At this age kids can see what is going on with parents and officials who make it political. They also see where major league players are not the best role models. Good time for this discussion.
Robotics is a great program , I highly recommend it.

Honestly, kids outgrow things. There were a few things my mom wouldn’t let me drop (until the year season for it was over) and I resented her for it. As an adult and mother I feel bad for ever resenting her because she busted her ass and didn’t have money to waste so she needed us to see it through for the year so that she could sleep peacefully through the night but she never forced us to continue to start it again every year. I genuinely wouldn’t push him. For some reason or another he wants to stop and he deserves to be able to stop if he wants to. Whether he’s gotta finish the season or not, but don’t force him to restart. It sounds more like you need him to have something that occupies a lot of his time vs allowing him to see how other things fit for him

How about asking him what he would like to do instead? Don’t force sports on your kid, not every kid likes sports.fins something he likes to do.

Don’t force sports, if he doesn’t enjoy it then it does more harm than good. I’ve tried that. Lots of other avenues to spend his time on. Music lessons, culinary classes, art, dance, swimming, etc

Sports gave my son confidence and he made life long friends. He is getting ready to leave for college for baseball

I introduced my child to many things, including all sports and let her choose what she wanted to do. She tried Basketball, but sports wasnt her thing. She loves to read and draw. Let him decide.

Taught them teamwork, responsibility, accountability, to work hard to get what you want, a since of pride, how to win & lose gracefully, and also brought them close friends, and exercise. Personally I believe it helped shape them into the young adults they are now both the good & bad times & kept them out of trouble compared to other kids I’ve watched grow up doing no organized activities.
It’s so hard for kids to go outside and just be kids anymore with all the risk & worried of kidnapping/sex trafficking ect but kids still need to be active so sports is a great way. Maybe let him try other sports like baseball, wrestling, hockey…

My 2 oldest kids are getting older 13,10 so I told they absolutely have to fine some kind of sport. So this year my oldest will be doing volleyball. Personally I think kids absolutely need some kind of push and to be involved in some kind of sports.

My partner doesn’t like sports of any kind, never has. Hated football from a baby unless he was throwing it at someone :roll_eyes::sweat_smile:… He loves fishing and motorbike racing, he takes apart things for the fun of it and puts them back together. His not over weight, he doesn’t have any health issues if thats what your worrying about. I wouldn’t push him, nothing worse than being forced to do something you don’t want to. And the guilt your putting on him for pushing your wants isn’t fair either.

Sports help if that’s what they want to do… Not everyone will be into sports, maybe let him figure what he wants to do with his time, if he’s always been doing sports & all he his free time has been… Maybe he’d like free time to just be a kid. Forcing kids to be in… Because you want seems more harmful, than good.

I have 2 boys. My youngest is a national wrestler at 16. We did not push him it’s something he has worked his butt off for and wanted to do. His older brother was in baseball, football, wrestling and band. Didn’t want to do anything after 8th grade. He’s still a great kid.

Swap extracurriculars. Find what’s available in your area… if you don’t like this then here are some options to choose from… What would you like to try now? This is an opportunity for him to expand himself. Dance (yes boys dance!!), Culinary (I absolutely loved my child being in culinary, she wanted to try recipes and cooked a good bit), debate team, music (one of my favs, teaches discipline) there’s so many things.

Maybe try something else he might like better maybe karate or boxing or ask what what your kid might be interested in doing

If he doesn’t want to do it then find what interests him and support that. Sports aren’t for everyone.

I wasn’t a sports kid but my brother and sister were. I tried softball one year, eh I finished the season but than I was done. Lol my boys have been doing soccer, & just finished baseball. Now they’re starting football and soccer. They want to try sports and find out what they like & I won’t make them sign up for anything again if they decide it’s not for them. I agree kids need something to do, from experience of just being at home I was lazy, depressed, & started trying to do things I probably shouldn’t of because I had too much time on my hands!

Have you asked why he doesn’t want to anymore? Doesn’t like the coach? Doesn’t like whose on his team? Just not interested in sports anymore?
Deepening on his reasoning, you can try another team/coach or just help him find a new hobby :blush:

Maybe find something else he enjoys. My kids dont get a choice. They will do something whether its cheer, softball, girl scouts,cub scouts, baseball, football even 4-H. Doesnt even have to be a sport but it has to be something thats educational and helpful because stuff like that it builds character and teaches them life skills and keeps them out of trouble. My oldest had severe anxiety. She wanted to play softball we let her now shes a different child. And wants to venture out more and see what else is out there she can do or play in the off season

Perhaps other outlets like music, art, theater, etc might be more for him? Give him something to channel his energy into that he really enjoys.

Extracurricular activities are only going to have a lasting positive impact on those who want to participate. If he doesn’t want to do those, let him pick a sport or activity of HIS choosing.

Imo the benefits of being on a sports team are negated if the kid truly isn’t interested. There are plenty of “time fillers” to choose from, but I know location matters too (I’m rural). Maybe reach out to a local community fb page & find out what all is available. Choose together what fits the kiddo’s needs & y’all’s schedules.

My son liked sports. My daughter didn’t. I’d never have forced either of them to participate in something they didn’t want to do. That’s selfish.

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I’ve always told my kids they had to be active in something. If they don’t want to play sports, I don’t push it. My son stopped playing football and signed up for the science club. To me, it’s not all about sports, just something to keep them involved. Maybe talk to him and see if their is something else he would be interested in doing?

I shattered my ankle the summer before grade 8. Never played any sports after that. I am a happy healthy 37 year old that has never been to jail and always had a job. One of the few people I know that bought a house by myself when I was 31.
Instead of playing sports I have always had a job since I was 13.

Definitely leave it up to him, maybe he’d be interested in doing other things like drawing or reading etc. he doesn’t have to play sports to occupy his time, your husband definitely is right on this one.

Also maybe just maybe let him be a kid and enjoy some time off without doing any extra activities maybe he just needs a break and that’s his way of saying it to you.

Sports helped me growing up by making me feel like I wasn’t as important as the kids who COULD play them, because my school district was CRAZY over their sports and unless you were athletic or a honor roll student, you fell through the cracks. It wasn’t until I transferred to a new district in high school that I FINALLY got the help I needed and my grades improved. Sports isn’t everything

Let him take a break for a season, maybe he just needs a break and will want to do it again next year. But i wouldnt make him do it because you want him to, id allow him to find his own hobbies that interest him.

My dad said we always had to do.something… sports or clubs…it was the rule. He had 3 of us in sports and clubs and endnof story we were in something

my kids are all in sports, they need some structured play time. They are 4(not in sports yet), 12, 17 and 19 now. The 3 oldest are all girls. My 17 year old will be playing basketball at our local college this fall. Sports they have done? Karate, Swimming, Volleyball, Soccer, Rugby, Football, Fastball, Basketball, Irish Dance, Ballet, Water Polo, Cross country running, Badminton. Right around 12 when their hormones started changing was when I got the pushback that they didn’t want to do certain things. Which is fine, but I have a few rules. They cant be on their phones. They need to get some kind of exercise every day and they need to find some sort of outlet. Also, as someone who hires… A person must learn to excel on their own as well as be a team player. There is no better place to learn that than with sport. Sports can also teach dedication, time management, perseverance, the list goes on… We are busy, but they have a great group of friends, I have a great group of friends

Don’t force your kid to do things they don’t want to do?
Has is done it for a while? Maybe he is burnt out, maybe he doesn’t find joy in it anymore.
Let.him find something else to do, it doesn’t have to be sports.

Find out what else your child likes to do and support them in that. There are plenty of other things that can be beneficially to children than sports. Forcing your child to do something they don’t wanna do can hender your relationship with them.

Just tell him he needs to find a hobby to occupy his time that allows him to get out of the house and have somewhere to be. I stopped sports in high school to smoke weed and party. Someone shouldve pushed me a little

Let him take a break. He might miss it and want it back. Often when pressured to do something wr want the opposite. He needs to find something he likes. Maybe music, maybe dance, or chess or something. Ask him if he had a choice if doing anything all as an activity what would it be.

My daughter was in dance till she was 11 she decided it wasn’t for her she looked into other things but decided she isn’t the sporty type she is very artistic and spends time drawing and creating different Digital content maybe not the advice your looking for but maybe another focus besides sports

You should never force your child to do something they don’t want to do just to take up time. How about let him tell you what he is interested in and let him choose how he fills his time? Parents can be dictators sometimes without even realizing it.

Your husband is right. Your kid is old enough to know what his interests are. If you press the issue, I promise, it’s not gonna be a good time.

As along as his interests haven’t fallen into all day/night video game marathons then let him tell you what he wants to do. What are his interests outside of sports? Art, theater, Robotics, etc.

Boy scouts helped my son more than sports. Maybe you could look into that

I wish my parents wouldn’t have put me in so many sports as a kid. I didn’t feel comfortable there and I would have anxiety attacks before practices

Maybe start by asking why, then addressing the issue. It could be social reasons, or feeling like he isn’t good enough.

Maybe give him the option to do something else sports aren’t for everyone, I was always active in clubs and teams but sports were not my thing, let him explore his interests

I hated sports. Still do. Hes old enough to make that choice for himself

Sports are not the only think for kids to be involved in. Try out some no sport options.

He at least something to fill his time cause you don’t want him to start getting into trouble out of boredom

Sports shouldn’t be forced on a kid who doesn’t have interest in playing.

It doesn’t have to be sports. Put him in art classes, coding classes, drama, 4h, whatever speaks to HIS interests

Not everyone likes sports. There are tons of other activities they may enjoy! Look up some options that work with your schedule and budget and let them choose one!

If your kid wants to do something support it because you never know how far they get

Sports are very beneficial but I definitely wouldn’t force him. Find something else he’s interested in.

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Find something else he’s into. My son did the same- quit baseball and football but got into bike riding- he made and sold a bunch of bird houses and saved up for the mountain bike that he wanted.

Personally, I think 12 is old enough for him to make his own decision regarding this.

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Dont make a jid do something they dont wanna do. Itll just cause resentment. Find out what it is he wants to do. Like science groups, library groups for different things… theres so many other options than just sports.

Talk to him. Find out what he’s interested in and let him decided what he wants to do. Let him be him. Would you want someone pushing into something you don’t like or want to do?

Let him figure it out. Once he finds something else he wants to try then support him.

Pushing him is just going to make it worse and then all he learns is resentment.

See if hes just wanting something more creative art, theater, orchestra, band, or if he wants to try other sports. Maybe have a conversation to see if he simply wants to focus on school more than extra curriculars… quite a few of my classmates decided to do this

Maybe he wants to try something different. Maybe a martial art?

Unless he was a die hard sports kid , then something deeper is happening and you need to get to the bottom of it. If not and it’s mostly just you as a parent just putting him in everything and he’s really not that into it , then let him make his choice. Find something else he’s good at. Or interested in.

Id make him finish out the season since he made the commitment…however I wouldn’t make him renew next season.

He’s right. You shouldn’t push your kids into something that interests you and not them. :roll_eyes: He’s almost a teenager, if he doesn’t want to play sports he shouldn’t have to. You’ll end up with other issues by doing that!

Being outdoors is a sport :slightly_smiling_face: try other things like fishing, camping, hunting, boating, hiking

If you force them it will only make them hate it more.

I really dont think that sports should be pushed but I do agree he needs to find something he likes and stick It out if he sighns up for it.

You should look up the studies about sports, well being and education.

You are pushing it too much. It is HIS time. Let HIM decide what to do with his time.
If he doesn’t want to do anything, that is his choice.

Some kids just don’t like sports why do parents tend to push the issue I have 2 grandsons who hate sports one loves art the other loves math stop trying to push your child to be in a click there not interested in just because you are

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Ask him what he would like to do?

Maybe ask what else he’d like to do?
Art, music, dance etc :woman_shrugging:
Sport isn’t everything. Just make sure his still active in his every day life.

Sports taught discipline, practice, focusing and teamwork😉

If he doesn’t want to, he shouldn’t have to

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Ask him what he likes and fill his time with that in productive ways.