How should I handle this situation with my husband?

I’ve been married almost a year; yet, my husband is still holding on to his little black book of women. Should I approach him about this? He’s 43 & I’m 32

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How should I handle this situation with my husband?

That would have been gone when we met !

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That would of been gone if we started dating…

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He’s prob insecure, so he wants to make you feel insecure. Tell him it’s okay because you recently found yours too… He’ll go light the fire to burn it in I bet!

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For those saying that would have been gone when y’all met or started dating what if y’all broke up?
As far as the book is he calling them up?

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Your married so it
Should be gone smh

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I didn’t think people had an actual book anymore. I’ve still got at least one ex in my phone. Some because I’m friends with them, some just so I know not to answer or respond.

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Not acceptable at all why does he need to keep it ? That’s what I would ask him

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Uhmmm why? That would have been burned while we were dating, way before marriage.

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Black book goes in trash once married‼

Girl. Make that thing disappear.

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No you should just burn it

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Ask him why he still thinks he needs to hang onto it ?

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Either it goes, or you do. having something like this is unacceptable after you’ve said “I do”. If he’s truly in love with you and 100% committed to you, why does he need it? Put your foot down, remember the old saying" You give an inch and they’ll take a mile"… No comprimise on shit like this, period.

He’s a weirdo. :woman_shrugging:t4:
People still have books like that? Smh wow

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Get rid of it for him :woman_shrugging:

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Wrap it up and pack it in a box of other memories. My question is is it just women or are there business and family contact info also?

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Take it when he isn’t looking and throw it away

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Start your own little black book!

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Why did you get married…you just like the idea…

No you should leave him

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What?! Lol this should have been gone while you were dating if he was serious about you. :woman_shrugging:t3:

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If he still has it…Why marry him? He should have gotten rid of it long ago. Burning it will do NOTHING. You don’t know how many he has memorized, still talks to, stored on computers or his phone…Either just let it go or leave. Really the only choices. If you choose to stay, do marriage counseling.

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He’s a man child however if q person is gonna cheat nothing you do can stop it.

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Put it this way as soon as I got with my now husband he got rid of his lil black book and we weren’t even bf and gf when he did , that’s dodgy af and honestly I bet his phones full he sounds like an ex of mine

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I’d put in the sink, douse it with lighter fluid and then laugh as it turns to ash. But that’s just me.

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Umm what?? So is he occasionally going to this little black book for reasons? Like did you know he had this before y’all got married?
:triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post:Take that thing and :fire: it with an evil laugh​:joy:

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I still talk to all of my ex’s no big thing unless you’re insecure.

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I would get a little black book & put a few names in it & put it in your dresser. Wait until he finds it : just smile :grin:

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Pretty sad that you feel the need to snoop. Screams insecurity and trust issues on your part. Is it possible that that the little black book also includes other friends and business contacts? You are not the boss of him.

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Throw it out🤷 your the wife now

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That’s a real thing? BRB off to do some "cleaning "

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That shit has to go or he needs to go, time to grow up buddy lol

Unmarry him real fast.

Don’t say anything for a few month the. Let it magically disappear

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Steal it and burn it

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I think it should’ve been gone when you became engaged.

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I thought tht was Suhin kids do :joy::see_no_evil:

Either confront or just leave now before you’re too deep into that marriage

Rip out all the pages and burn it right in front of him :fire::fire:

My husband would be GONE in 2 seconds

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I would burn it then kick him out but I’m petty :woman_shrugging:t2:

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Get your own black book :sunglasses::dancer:

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Take it and f*ck all of them now it’s your black book be a pimpin player then you have the hair on bitches and not him

Burning it or getting rid of it won’t stop him. You aren’t changing his mind set by doing that. He doesn’t respect or care for you and it shows🤷‍♀️ stand up for yourself! This is unacceptable.

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First off… who tf has a “little black book”??? That’s some dumb Hollywood movie bullshit. :roll_eyes:

Nah find a window frame and frame it for him. Lol.

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Get your own book you think!

It’s like a young girls diery …some keep it to remember the past…I’m sure most of those numbers are no longer in existence…it also says his a player…

You should take half his shit and find someone 23 instead :grin::grin:

Should’ve talked about that before walking down the aisle…. I don’t know why the concept of self respect and worth is so hard to understand!?!

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What is that !? Like pictures in a diary of every woman he has been with or something!? If so that’s weird especially a married man…even not married that’s weird lol

I know where I’d shove his little black book….

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Burn it while he watches and then get him gone :joy:

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Girl. Shove his little black book up his ass while you pack your shit and walk out. He doesn’t respect you at all

Literally a book? Who writes numbers down? Maybe i rely on my phone too much. Idk.

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Burn it in front of him, then pack your shit and bounce😁

Yes it’s disgusting and super disrespectful

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What do your ages have to do with anything?
Is he calling any of them?
Do you have any momentos from your single life that you haven’t gotten rid of?

I’m trying to get past the you married a man that keeps a little black book of women? That’s like a dating relationship dealbreaker. Either you are all in or you’re not.

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Throw him away
Seriously he ain’t wanna be married.
:unamused:
Please move on you’ll be happier

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Why marry someone who don’t respect you? Divorce him! He doesn’t want to be married and he’s no where near ready for marriage or a relationship if he’s gonna keep something like that.

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Did you know about the book before you got married

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That’s still a thing? Just straight out ask him why he still has it and tell him you would appreciate if he didn’t keep it out of respect for you and your marriage. If he refuses to get rid of it then that’s when you say bye :wave: to him.

It’s proberbly just memory’s, I have been married 3 times and have lots of ex boyfriends, still keep photos of memories shared with every one of them, you can’t change past. Same as I understand that my husband has past females in his life and wives. Grow up people

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Um absolutely approach that. That is narcissistic. Like…lemme hang onto this as a back up plan. Burn that book, or better yet, walk away from him. Because if there is a book, there is a back up copy of it somewhere. Been there, 7 years later realized it wouldn’t end.

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You can’t erase memories of his life. Throwing away the book will do nothing. Maybe it’s a confidence thing for him at this age.

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Lol sound like high school to me :rofl: throw that crap out :rofl:

Clean house while he’s out :woman_shrugging:

That shoulda been gone before ya’ll got married

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:flushed: There’s a lot of women saying to burn it or throw it out while he’s gone but the fact of the matter is he should’ve done something about that when ya’ll got serious and certainly before marriage. Not you, him.

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Don’t u have a memory book of pictures of ex friends and ect? I mean I would put it up in with ur memory books I don’t see any thing wrong with it. I mean no naked pictures of course but

You say “he’s still holding on to” is he carrying around with him? Or is it put up somewhere? If he’s carrying it around with him, he might be using it.

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He would go great with the binders of women guy. The fact that he kept a phone directory of his previous lays is tacky enough, but to continue keeping it after he’s married is just trashy.

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Burn it just like I did his Playboy books

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Ummm leave, he’s cheating WTF

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Slightly Change all the numbers turning 1’s into 4’s 3’s into 8’s, etc. :crazy_face:

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Oh hell no! What’s he keeping it for? For like a back up? That’s so disrespectful to you. Tell him ditch the book or he can get out.

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Are you talking phone numbers or pictures?

Ask him why he wants it

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So hes keeping back burners? Do you really need us to answer this question for you?

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People still have them​:rofl::rofl:

Ask him if he has any pictures of these girls so you can check them out see if they’re hot Watch his attitude changed very quickly guys want your response of jealousy Boosting their ego if you don’t give it they change their attitude… Say fuck that I’m a bad bitch and I’m better than them and move on

Hmm, primes midlife crisis time. Maybe he wants it as backup or to remember a time when he could turn heads. Put it in a “memory box” together and stick it away in the attic, garage, or wherever it’s not really accessible. He’s already got a hot younger wife 10 years HOA junior.

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Bottom line, you have a life ahead of you and you deserve
happiness. Lose the turd and move on.

yes, he needs to chuck it, or the wedding vows mean nothing.

Tear it up! Or open the door and throw him out!

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But what does the book contain? Pictures? Numbers? Just old memories?

Burn it in front of him

Burn the damn thing!

My husband asked why you even married him? Red flag.

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No. Your husband isn’t worth spit. Depart

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Ummm I would say I found it, saw what is was and figured you didn’t need it anymore. If he freaks out you know will know why he still has it.

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I’d take that and throw it away away from the house! That shit should have been trash the moment he asked u to marry him!!

He is no good you should confront him I was married 55 years and never would of done that my wife was my only love

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If you don’t trust him yes. If you trust him no.

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If it truely bothers you then by all means talk to him about it.

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What’s a black book?

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Wtf did you marry him knowing he had it back when you were just dating, let alone engaged and now married?

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