How to cope with not having more kids?

How does everyone cope with being done having babies? Our third is 8 months old. We are done having babies for various reasons including that my husband will be 42 this year. She is starting to be mobile and it’s really been difficult for both of us to swallow that she is our last baby. It would be one thing if one of us absolutely didn’t want another, but a small part of both of us wishes we could have one more. It is so much more heartbreaking then I imagined to let go of these baby years

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How to cope with not having more kids?

Have another baby. You’ll never regret it. But you might regret not having one as time passes.

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I’m not sure… after my 3rd I knew I never ever wanted more. Maybe get a puppy? Lol

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Following for advice too. I’m 39 just had my 1st (I was told I couldn’t have kids) now she’s almost 10 months and I’m sad I can’t have more. (I was abrupting at birth so had to have a hysterectomy)

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I have my tubes tied after my 4th baby. I still get baby fever, but it passes, thank God :grin:

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Had my 9th @ 46!years old. Hubby died the following year.

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I had the same feeling when we decided that we were done with babies. It really hurt for a while but the older my last baby got and the more I looked forward to “older kid stuff”, the feeling went away. I really was having feelings of despair when my husband had his vasectomy. Like down to secretly hoping I was already pregnant :sweat_smile: but now the thought of another baby wants me to become celibate :joy::joy:

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I just try to focus on the good at where my kids are at in life. My baby is 18 months and although a part of me misses being pregnant or having a newborn, I remember the lack of sleep and how hard it was. I just look forward to the future. I knew I’d personally never be done having babies though. I would always want more, so I left the decision of how many kids we would have up to my husband.

Then have another one…if u feel the want

Hold and snuggled other people’s babies. I stopped after our last baby at 41.

Why stop if both of you are reasonably healthy people and you can afford another child? If neither one of you feel that you are done, then you’ll live with regret if you do stop.

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I would have loved to have a couple more but it just wasn’t in the cards. I was sad for a couple years but I love that me and hubby get to go adventuring together with out little ones :heart:

I just had had hopefully( I did not get tubs tied) my last one 10 months ago at age 40… I have an 20 and 18 yr old daughters thought my baby days were over after not happening in 18 yrs… Both my girls came to me told me they were pregnant then a few months later I find out I’m pregnant… I was asking god why but everything happens for a reason… I was pregnant same time as my girls that was something special… My grandson came then granddaughter then my blessing entered the world… It’s definitely a lot harder now then it was in my 20s but I wouldn’t change it for the world…

Apparently I’m embracing it by spoiling the shit out of her. :crazy_face::crazy_face:

I’m going thru the exact same thing. My little girl is 9 months. I got my tubes tied cuz of the pregnancy being so hard on me being 35 years old. Now I want another but can’t and it breaks my heart. I regret getting my tubes tied and even discussed having them untied but it’s doubtful with how expensive it is. I have a 6 year old boy and 7 year old girl along with my 9 month old. I shouldn’t have anymore but hate that I can’t if I wanted to. It’s hard to accept I’m done and it breaks my heart

What I learned is that there’s a difference between missing when your kids were babies and actually wanting another child. My three kids are nearly grown now and I still think every day about the early years. But the “I want another one” feeling passed within a year or so after having my third child.

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I mean you dont have to have more babies yoy can always volunteer in a daycare type of thing yo watch over sweet littles
Or even just help a mom destress in her life many moms need a break and im sure you know a mommy or two that would love some help

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Wishes for another baby are not good enough reasons to have another baby. They are emotional feelings that come and go. Only have another baby if you are able to provide food, clothing, shelter, love, an education, encouragement and more for the child’s lifetime.

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If you and your partner want another baby and are financially stable then why not. You will regret it if you don’t. It’s wat you both want so don’t let age be a factor

My son and I almost died during childbirth, so a second child was out of the question. I had to go through the 5 stages of grief. Focus on planning memorable trips with the kids you have now. If you still feel strongly about having another baby, then do it! It is your life. :heart::+1::heart:

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Count the blessings you have.

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Have another. You will regret it if you don’t especially since there’s a small chance you both want one. I have 5 and knew I was fine after the last.

We had lots of long talks while I was pregnant with our last about our decision to not have anymore. We grieved the baby years before we had our son and came to terms with it. We both got fixed and couldn’t be more happy with our decision now.

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Yeah I feel this. My 3rd is turning 2 in 3 days and I wish we could have a 4th. But he got a vasectomy !I miss the newborn phase. I always get baby fever

My youngest is almost 6 years old… it’s heartbreaking that we’re constantly having “lasts”. Last time he needs me to help make a drink, help put his shoes on, help pick out clothes, etc… but I’ve found peace in knowing that without another baby I have more time to take this boy and his older sister to do big kid activities and cherish each little moment as they continue to grow! Plus I’ve been fostering baby kittens to feel needed lol

My Daughter just had her 3rd The other 2 are grown and on there own she’s 45 says the only downfall is her patience just runs thin and it seems like it is much harder on her … But she said she doesn’t regret it one bit …Her 3 grandsons in Japan are the same age as her new baby …I would say go for it before it gets to late …

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l get paid over $ 185 per hour w­o­r­k­i­n­g from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $ 17391 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.

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Focus on the 3 children you have; some people can’t have children at all. Enjoy watching them grow and eventually give you grandchildren. Focus on present, not what could have been.

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My husband is 51, I’m currently 32 weeks pregnant with our 3rd.

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If you both wish you could have one more then have one more……?

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I was done myself and still dont want anymore.
If youre saying “WE” dont want anymore…youre obviously not speaking for yourself lol
Youre speaking for your husband.
Think about what YOU want❤️

If it’s possible I’d consider having another but only after waiting a year or so an revisiting the discussion then. I mean if you are not absolutely done you shouldn’t just say no more you should talk it over and go through everything as to the pros and cons of if you can an if you really do want to stop having kids.

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Adoption is a great thing. Me and my husband want to foster, so many kids that never had a family.

You only gave one reason why you shouldn’t have another baby. Is it really important that you shouldn’t have one more? I knew I was done after my second baby, but my situation was different. I was in a bad marriage and I didn’t think I would be able to support more than two children. I had my boy and girl. It was important to bond tightly with the kids I had and make a go of it. But for you, you have a stable marriage and a stable home… there could be one more. But if you’ve decided this baby girl is your last, it’s time to circle the wagons and make sure your family time is special. Have game nights where you play cards or board games. Have movie nights with pop and popcorn. If you can, set up a fire pit outside for stories and s’mores. Roasted hotdogs and chips. Have pizza night. Make sure your life is centered around your kids. And make it so that even when they leave the nest, the door is still open on weekends for special nights for them and eventually them and the grandkids. It’s obvious you’re loving and caring parents. God love you for it. Your kids are truly blessed.

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My husband is 49 in Oct and r youngest is 7 months old and we r wanting one more still to make number 8

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Enjoy the moments with your last and cherish them. Focus on the good. You got to have 3 healthy beautiful babies.

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Take the age out of it. Have another one if it’s in yalls hearts to have another! If y’all are able to financially support another baby, go for it!!

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Be thankful for the 3 u have

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My youngest is 13. I will never have another baby. But all my friends, nieces and others have babies. I can hold one of em if I need to. Cant wait till I have grand babies.

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i just had my 4th at 43 and my husband is 44 he is a month old and call me crazy we just talked about having another one, hubby brought up about using protection as i could get pregnant east because our son is so new i said no, we are married we dont use them(haha) he’s like well you know what that means possibility of another child i said if it happens it happens. so we have decided if we do we do if we dont we dont let it be natural your age doesnt define what you are able to do

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If both of you still wishes you could have one more child than you won’t be coping well on this being your last baby. If you want another child than have one.

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As time goes by it gets better and you realize you made the right choice. Once they are independent and you can start doing more things it helps.

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Try fostering. There’s lots of kids that need home temperarily

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l get paid over $ 185 per hour w­o­r­k­i­n­g from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $ 20538 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.

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If health wise and financial wise you can have one more then do it! No regrets! :blush:

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I found it was better to live in the moment… and honesty it just gets better as they grow.

I feel ya hun I loved being pregnant and having lite ones . Mine are now 3,5,6,7 my husband got :scissors: 2 and 1/2 yrs ago . Cause we have 2 boys and 2 girls but I want pregnant and I miss having a baby . But if he wouldn’t of gotten done I’d be pregnant with number 6 by now :woman_facepalming:t3:

I told my husband once the baby is 6-8 I’d love to adopt. He’s adopted and this gives me hope I can have a baby or even a toddler again even if I’m not the one who births them :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

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With open legs hahah bc I don’t want any more baby’s our 3 is 8 months and we are done I got fixed so we can do it all day haha

I feel you I went and got my tubes tied and regret it :100:

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Throw a party to CELEBRATE your family being complete :joy:

:woman_shrugging: you just do. Time to focus on us and what we want to do. That seems to be helping.

Lots of baby snuggles from someone else :rofl:

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Why would anyone want to bring children into this world of crime and chaos?

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There are plenty of kids to adopt :pray:

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I would just be grateful you had how many you could. I have an 8 year old and seem to not have any luck having another one.