my fiancé has mouth herpes from his previous relationship. His last cheated on him constantly and he just got really screwed over… it’s something he’s really embarrassed of (I try to make him as comfortable with me as much as possible which we’re almost there!) but I’m 35 weeks pregnant. I get checked as often as I can and we are VERY careful. I love him so much and would NEVER leave him for something like this! I’m worried when our son is born how do I take extra precautions just to make sure he stays safe… I HATE it for my SO and our son that he can’t kiss him and it’s not his fault… anyone else go through this? What do I do…
It should be cleared up by time baby is here with the correct treatment. It is very very dangerous for pregnant women an babies left untreated.
He will have the virus for life. But that doesnt mean he can never kiss his baby. Only if he has an outbreak. I mean I’m sure you kiss him right? There are so many people who have it in this world.
My mom has had it since she was 4 years old, but me and my brother nor any of her grands have it. She just has never kissed us or shared food or drink when she has a cold sore or feels like she is getting one. It doesn’t mean he can never kiss his child. My momma gave me and my brother plenty of hugs, kisses and snuggles when we were little.
He only can’t kiss the baby if he has a current sore on his mouth. Otherwise, he is in the clear. Just have him be cautious if he feels one coming on. Talk to your doctor about it. They can give you advice.
Its called cold sores and a lot of people have them …your kid will probably be born with the virus… it’s not the same as sexual herpes
Boost the immune system as much as possible! L-lysine supplements, and an immune booster supplement. He could also go on an antiviral medication. But using your body’s own immune system to suppress viral shedding is so key in preventing outbreaks!
If I were you, I’d get a blood test to check for the virus.
God forbid you have a breakout during labor.
There is other ways of showing love and support towards a baby not just by kissing it. I do get what you mean but I’d rather be safe then sorry and make sure the baby stays healthy. I hate when even my own family or my fiancé family kisses my children because you just never know. And I’m a germaphobe soooo
You need to ask for advise from your OBGYN and also google oral herpes (I recommend CDC website). You both should NOT kiss the baby on the lips. Even if you have no visible lesion! -the prodromal stage is when a lesion is developing and is not visible and you have no symptoms (you don’t feel it) but you are still shedding virus from that spot. Take you meds as directed if you are on them and avoid your triggers if you know them.
Unless he’s in a breakout he’s not going to infect the baby.
Yeah don’t ever kiss a newborn. It’s not safe. And so scary when they can die from it quickly…
Herpes simplex is extremely common, some people are immune to the outbreaks my father brother and I are but my mom has it and gets cold sores as does my grandmother. He cannot kiss him with an outbreak and just try and keep saliva contact between him and your son to a minimum as you can still pass it without an outbreak. But if you’ve never gotten it from him theres a chance your immune and your son will be too so alls not lost. Just be careful.
It’s cold sores and millions of people have the virus in their body but have never had an outbreak. It’s not regular herpes… he’s not going to infect anyone unless he has an outbreak and he’ll know when he has one you can feel them coming on.
It’s only contagious if it’s during an outbreak. You can safely have sex with a partner that doesn’t have it as long as you don’t have sex with an outbreak. The same goes for kissing.
Have him get on a daily anti-viral medication and not kiss the baby when he’s getting or has a cold sore. Most people can tell when one is coming on.
You probably have it and are unaware. Over 85% of the population has it and many have it and have never had an outbreak. He can still kiss his child. You need to get educated.
Never heard of “mouth herpes”
People are giving you false information with the best of intentions. You need to speak to a medical professional who can give you both the best and more accurate safety precautions possible.
Everyone carries the herpes simplex virus
Pregnant mom should be on anti-virals and have a CSection!
Tea tree oil helps so that it doesn’t scab up too bad when he gets a breakout and can even prevent a breakout if caught in time. Also, there’s a pill that can be prescribed to prevent future breakouts, but once again, has to be taken 3 times a day when the tingle is first felt. I have cold sores. I’ve had them for as long as I can remember. Probably got the virus from my parents as I liked to take their drinks and drink after them. I have always kissed my babies as long as I wasn’t infected and I’ve never given it to them. It’s for life, but it can be worked with. To he honest I didn’t even know about the pill until after my stillborn last year when the stress broke me out so bad it was all over my face! I suppose it didn’t help I almost died and had a blood transfusion. Good luck. It’s not as bad as it seems.
Yeah…no kissing the baby.
It’s a cold sore he can kiss the baby if there’s no outbreak! It’s not a big deal!
I’d make an appointment with y’alls family Dr or even OBGYN and have them talk with the both of y’all. They can tell you more then what any of us can. Good luck.
There’s simplex 1 and simplex 2. He needs to get it checked. And go from there. Talk to doc instead of fb.
L-lysine can help people not have breakouts.
My mom got mouth herpes in the 50s when men treated their wives as property and were able to fuck around and beat them with no consequence. My mom was never embarrassed about it and I grew up knowing to just never kiss her when she’s having an outbreak. The person can apparently feel it distinctly and knows when an outbreak is coming and when it is gone. My dad was married to her for 27 years and he never got it. Best wishes OP
Don’t ever let him kiss you or the baby, as soon as he kisses you and then you kiss the baby, the baby is exposed to it! Contiguous or not!! don’t don’t don’t
Medical advice is better than Facebook advice.
Cold sores are natural anyone can get them. Its “herpes” but different than the genital kind. It’s not as bad as the genital kind. Not very many people know that it is herpes anyway
I kiss my daughter. You should know when an outbreak is happening and avoid. There is also pills to help prevent outbreaks. He needs to talk to his doctor.
I personally would ask my obgyn about this
As long as he isn’t having an active outbreak he can kiss the baby. And you. L-lysine taken daily can also prevent outbreaks.
Honey I myself got it, my mother also had it. My son is almost 3 and he hasn’t never gotten a cold sore yet and neither has my SO I don’t drink or eat after them just in case and avoid any kisses or anything until it goes away
There is a medication the doctors can prescribe to put the virus in hibernation.
That being said, still use precautions.
Okay so I had a cold sore while going into labor with my son , I still had a vaginal birth , the doctors gave me valtrex and it helped tremendously. My advice would be to have him get to a doctor (if he has a cold sore at the time of birth) and see if they can give him some. But my son is just fine!! But I would recommend not kissing because YOU CAN spread it even if you don’t have a visible sore because some people carry it in there saliva.
You need to have a cesarean
It can be transmitted without any signs of an outbreak so yes you really need to be careful
My kids father would get cold sores about once a year. My kids are 5 and 6 almost 7. He kissed them and obviously me and none of us caught it. He didn’t do it when he had a cold sore but he would treat it with abrieva i think it’s called and it went away in a couple of days. But I would also talk to your doctor.
Mouth herpes? You mean a cold sore which is actually very common and not at all anything to do with being dirty or being sexually transmitted. Kissing is fine as long as he isn’t in outbreak. It can only be passed while a sore is present. The amount of mis information and the way people are talking is laughable. I have a cold sore on my nose right now… Because I’m run down and have immune system problems. Stop making out its some nasty disease . He’s no Risk at all to the baby unless he is contagious which he isn’t unless he has a sore
Most people have herpes 1 from from their parents. It isn’t anything to be ashamed of. Just make sure he doesnt kiss baby when he feels an outbreak coming on and you should be fine.
If there is any concern - The doctor will likely put you on prophylactic meds to prevent spread from you to the baby.
Most important - if your SO feels an outbreak coming on, make sure he does not kiss the baby. Of course, he can potentially go on a maintenance dose of meds to curtain outbreaks. Have him check with his doctor.
Herpes simplex a is passed along as a child, not an adult so chances are he didn’t get it from his cheating ex but got it when he was a child. Never ever kiss a child on the mouth and don’t receive or give oral if there is an active cold sore. Use L-Lysine when there’s a break out and abreva.
Lol cold sores are not the same as genital herpes lol you need to educate yourself. My sister’s and dad get cold sores all the time my mother, lil sis and myself have never had one and I share drinks with them when they have one on their lip. I have also dated a guy who got them and never have I contracted any thing lol and we kissed when he had one. Again educate yourself
Just don’t kiss him while he is a new born
I would play it super safe
None should be kissing him on his face anyway or hands that young .
Also it is hereditary so there is a chance your son may get them wether you like it or not
I’m not really sure what your asking. It sounds like you already know what to do. My husband gets cold sores sometimes. Maybe once every three years or so. I had my son at 30 weeks so I was pretty crazy (crazier? ) about germs. I don’t think he’s had a cold sore in the last 3 years but I was adamant that he not kiss near his mouth. Forehead I was ok with. And that worked out fine. Fin always wants to use everyone’s chap stick and I just tell him we don’t do that and he has his own. I never let him drink after anyone. I mean…you want to feel bad for him? Fine but you just can’t let that interfere with your child’s health and I wouldn’t think he would understand that and feel the same way. My husband understood it. And really it’s just good practice anyway. It will help to keep him from catching every virus and bacteria in the universe.
Tell him to take his meds to prevent the cold sores …?? Simple as that, I think.
Talk to your doctor and to him. It can be managed especially depending on the form. Cold sores are genetic BUT if his ex had it she could’ve given it to him… but again, it can only be transmitted while an outbreak is going on. There’s also medication that can be given to knock it out, like a comment previously said, when you take it at the sign of a tingle of where the sore may come. I’ve had cold sores all my life (except in the last few years) usually when the weather changes from hot to cold and cold to hot or when I get really sick. Luckily I haven’t had one in a while because they are embarrassing and the lack of knowledge on it makes it worse. People hear herpes and think it’s an STD when in actuality it’s genetic and we couldn’t help it. I have NEVER had an std before and learned about the different form in college while taking biology. I always associated my cold sores with getting a fever (hence the name fever blister) or being sick and my immune system being weakened. It can be managed and he can still be affectionate with his son. Just educate yourselves on it and find out what he actually has. You’ll all be fine
He’s only contagious if he has an outbreak? Correct?
It’s also dangerous while pregnant as it is a TORCH infection herpes simplex virus (cold sores) can cause congenital deformities. I would abstain as much as possible from contact with a sore; however, it can also be transmitted without a visible lesion. Your boyfriend should be taking an antiretroviral such as acyclovir. I suggest speaking with your health care provider. Herpes simplex virus can be passed on at any age and even transplacental (so in the womb) as well if you were to have a sore and give birth vaginally. Mouth sores can be transmitted to the genitalia and vice versa. I suggest having a thorough conversation with your health care provider and having your boyfriend there as well. Also, because HSV is a dormant virus so you wouldn’t know you had it until you have a sore, some people go years without having one and then have a stressful day, too much sun, or some sort of damage to the lip and they end up having a sore.
ffs it’s just cold sores why the hell would you ever think your wife would leave you for that
He could have had this condition before hand but without symptoms. Cold sores, and canker sores type a herp. Common. My parents and brother get them. I’ve only ever gotten an occasional canker sore. 🤷
…talk to a doctor about this. I’m just assuming they would be the experts on what you can do.
Dear lord…lots of folks talking nonsense about this. Go to the doctor for pity’s sake and get the correct information. Most of these people are wrong and confused.
Who ever laughed at this post is a huge P.O.S!!! Miserable clowns!
I’ve had herpes for 25 or more years… had 2 kids. A large portion of the population has “mouth herpes” it’s actually just cold sores and very common. If it’s not then it’s herpes simplex- doesn’t matter if sores are on mouth… he and u can take acyclovir to prevent spread, it’s safe in pregnancy and I take it and did with both babies. It’s scary and definitely leads to weird feelings about yourself but he can takes meds and u should get a test to see if u have it ASAP… just a blood test.
He can kiss him just not when he has an outbreak. I get cold sores (which is the same thing) and have since I was a child. It’s hereditary for me. My mother and my sisters get them too. I just don’t kiss anyone and wash my hands often as I can when I have one. It’s really no big deal if he takes precautions. When he feels the tingle he should take some Valtrex (if he doesn’t have any he should ask for a script bc that stuff rocks) and it won’t even breakout.
Do nose kisses instead?
I get cold sore if I run a fever or in the sun. It’s not often tho. He can kiss the baby as long as he doesn’t have a cold sore. When I do get them, I just wash my hands and face and don’t come in contact with my kids as far as kissing their head or face.
It’s not contagious unless he has an open sore lol…
Smh speak to your doctor and stop freaking out. About 90% of Americans have it. Just don’t kiss him when he has a sore or on onset of them. I figured this would be pretty basic knowledge since so many people have them but I guess not
I’ve had colds sores Since I was a child. You just don’t leave anything around that has contact with the lip. I have 2 daughter’s and they are fine. My partner hasn’t had one for over 10 years (We have been together for 12)
Talk to your OB about taking Valtrex (Valacyclovir) for both you and SO.
I wouldn’t stress much on the after baby is born. But please be extra careful with yourself right now… if you were to contact the virus now as a first time it could really be detrimental to baby. Not to scare you or speak n negativity but seriously… I contracted it at about that time and my son was born emergency c section because I was so sick. When it immune system is down from pregnancy it causes all kinds of issues. I didn’t know I had it as I had an “internal” outbreak the virus wreaked havoc on me. My son was early but ok, well they didnt know he contacted it from me in utero and at 9 days old he was life flighted 3 hours away for 8 weeks and the doctors told me he should have died. He had liver failure from the virus and his spinal fluid tested positive saying it went to his brain. Miracles happen and hes now 7.5 and not severely handicapped like they said he would be. He gets cold sores on his finger though.
It’s just cold sores. Like 85% of the population has it.
Girl almost everyone gets cold sores… lol
You shouldn’t be kissing newborns on the lips period because of germs and bacteria.
But herpes isn’t anything to worry about if he’s not having an outbreak. My husband has had cold sores (mouth herps) since before we ever got together (2008) and it’s now 2019… still haven’t passed it on to me. When he has an outbreak we don’t kiss, I’ll peck him on the cheek before work instead of a normal kiss and we don’t share drinks. When it’s dormant we are normal. Our son is ten, and never contracted either.
Why don’t people ask their doctor these questions??
You need to tell your doctor. Otherwise they won’t know to take precautions throughout your final weeks of pregnancy.
I got my first cold sore when I was in labour with my third baby. She had to stay in the NICU due to the other issues but the nurses told me I had to go talk to infection control in the hospital to see if I can even enter the NICU. Cold sores are deadly if newborns get one. The dude told me that I had to wear a bandaid over it and don’t touch my face. Also wash hands, and sanitize constantly.
Don’t kiss your baby, or touch your face if y’all have an ACTIVE sore. Even when it starts tingling… til the end. The end is when the scab flakes off and the redness goes away.
First of all, Herpes can kill infants. Second of all, 85 percent of the population has HSV1. There are different stages of herpes, HSV1 being the least problematic. Either way, HSV1 can and HAS killed infants. Do your research. I’ve done mine for many years.
He should talk to his doctor about it and what precautions he needs to take.
Vitamin F and calcium will help to keep them in check. Open sores is only time he is contagious. Open sore is also an indication that his tissue calcium levels are low (not blood calcium), so the calcium isn’t being transported to the tissue and vitamin F is needed (which is a polyunsaturated fatty acid found in butter and fatty meats). Standard process vitamins have really helped those that I know that have this virus. You can check the standard process website to find someone who sells them near you. But its cataplex F and Calcium that help… F is also really good for ppl who get sunburnt easily…
You need to talk to your dr … and he should be there to answer questions if he feels more comfortable maybe you should leave the room so the dr gets he truth Nd can go from there idk some guys lie when there embarrassed but he needs to be truthful because like some other pointed out herpes can be dangerous to babies during active breakouts good luck mama and don’t worrie too much there are meds he can take if your still worried it controlled the outbreaks
Herpes simplex 1 is only contagious while the blister is present on his mouth. Still, look into getting him on valtrex, to lessen the flare ups.
His ex didn’t cheat and give him herpes. He got it himself being risky. Second of all, that kind is very common and unless there’s an outbreak, youllbe fine.
I get cold sores multiple times a year. My kids are just fine. Just tell him not to kiss the baby when he has an open sore n he’ll be just fine
u can kiss your baby with herpes omg
Talk to your doctor. No kissing.
Do your research and ask your doctor.
Why don’t people ask doctors half these questions? Hello! Its where you will get the best answer.
When you go into labor, there is a certain antibiotic you can ask for
Go to the doctor and get lots of infotmation see whats safe.
My daughter had shingle break outs on her face ( by her eyes) since her early teens. She had two children , washed her hands before you hung them and had to be very careful if she had a break out and the kids diapers had to be changed. Neither of the kids has ever had a breakout not shown any signs. They are 28 and 23. So ask your doctor about precautions and you will have no problems. Make sure you use clean towels and wash clothes every time you use them on your child. And when broken out no kissing , but I’m sure you knew that.
The viral shedding can happen at anytime so just don’t share drinks and no kissing when there is an outbreak. Generally keep dads spit away from the baby.
Cold sores aren’t that big of a deal. I always got one starting as a child anytime I’d start to get sick. As long as he doesn’t have a sore he can kiss his baby. they have cheeks too lol
Most people have some form of it. As long as he takes meds and is a aware when he has an “outbreak” no worries. Very easy to contain if you try.