I disliked the entire front office at my son’s old school. (There we’re like 3 secretaries.)
His new school is absolutely amazing. Including the front office.
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Maybe she’s having a hard time and can’t super cheerful right now. We don’t know her life, we don’t know if she was rude or just very blunt, we don’t actually know except for this version. You felt she was rude and that’s valid. What I got from this conversation was there’s prob a communication blunder on what the next step was since you both had very different ideas of that.
It’s weird though that you called the secretary instead of guidance for that, that’s who gives us that information here.
Put in a complaint to the school board and Department of Education
Talk to the principal. The secretary reports to the principal. It’s his/her job to deal with complaints about their employees. I am on a school board. The school board has no authority over matters such as this. And certainly neither does the department of education as someone here suggested complaining to them, which is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard.
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I really wouldnt worry about it… if your daughter is happy at school & thriving then the school secretary is not a problem… shes there to do her job & thats all x
I had the same issue when my daughter was in elementary school (rude secretary). She also went to the same elementary school I did, and guess what. That secretary was a well seasoned secretary when I attended 20 years prior. Based on my experience, you can call till your are blue in the face. Nothing will happen unfortunately.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How to deal with rude school staff? - Mamas Uncut
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The secretary’s immediate supervisor is the principal. Start there.
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I agree… go to her boss… let them know she needs some people skills… you are better than me cause I would have already made her change that attitude
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I would just ask her if there was some kind of issue as to why she hadn’t reached out to you and why you where being treated that way.
We had a somewhat rude lady in the front office at my daughter’s school too, she would make little snide remarks, and just rude at times. Luckily she left and switched schools.
Contact either the principal or superintendent. Had the same problem, except it was the assistant principal.
Go to the Principals office
Report her , I reported one like that at my daughters school only last week as I had a call in error saying my 9 year old wasn’t at school. Dispite dropping her in myself I obviously panicked. I rang back after asking several parents if they had seen her and they all said yes she went in . I asked if they could please double check as it had set my aniexty off and if she was missing I needed to inform the police ASAP … she said she didn’t have time to go checking for panicking parents!!! In that time another receptionist the one I had originally spoke to had checked and left me a message saying my daughter had gone to the loo and hadn’t been registered she apologised and all was fine about that but I reported the other for her attitude. I’m yet to hear back x
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Record the rudeness so you have proof and then go to the principal.
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My elementary kids secretary is amazing. I don’t deal with they jr high school one as I talk directly to their principal when I need something.
I’d go above her head and go to the principal as it sounds like she doesn’t like her job and finds answering the phone a pain. Going above her head will get her to change her attitude or she may be out of a job.
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Yes! I said something to mine they deal with children all day n thats the attitude? I told her if she was that miserable maybe she should go find another job🤷🏻♀️ never another attd after that
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Ask her if there is a problem. Then explain that if the behavior continues you will contact the principal and further up if necessary
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Email the Vice Principal, Principal and cc the superintendent and the districts hr. You can find all their contact information on the school website or district website.
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Pandemic ebt? That just requires childs birthdAte
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When you go in to the school take a plate of cookies or something nice for the front office staff! I just kill them with kindness.
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Some are like that. Rude as can be. You can let others 8n the school know. But sometimes it just doesn’t help. Some people at just plan out rude. It’s just the way they are. But my shoes I just deal with it. As long my kids are taken care of and happy. I take one for them. ( I also buy them a drink once on a while, just hoping there rude would lighten up)
I pulled my son from a school for this reason. The secretary was mad bc I was out of town and he was getting off the bus at his dad’s. Well his dad had to be picked up by the ambulance due to medical reasons which they all knew he was disabled. All she needed to do was document that the bus driver was dropping him off at the neighbors instead of his dad’s. She got fired about a year later due to her mouth
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Put in an official complaint
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I think most school seccys are like this, just as bad as GP receptionists 
Put in a complaint to the school and next time she gives you grief just tell her to do her job and do one 
Record calls and conversations and take them to principals or superintendent.
When people are rude to me I like to ask if they are ok? Sometimes makes them realize they are being rude. If they are still rude and I ask why i reply with it just seems you are frustrated with the way you are speaking. Has a worked almost every time!
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It’s like you asked her a question but threw a threat in at the same time, “did you find that yet or do I need to call the school board”, the way you talk matters.
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Yes and she FINALLY left I was sooo pumped. Well just found out she went to the high school so looks like I’m gonna have to deal with her again. Ugh. Hopefully she’s gone in the next 2 years.
I would be asking her what her deal is why she always have a attitude towards me.
Contact her boss and file a complaint.
It’s been done to me… so I don’t see why she should get away with it.
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Why not just speak to her supervisor?
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Complain to her boss
You don’t need your kids school ID number for the PEBT card. You just call the 1800 number on the card and set up a pin. You haven’t really explained how she’s terrible to deal with, the school secretary deals with a lot of things and probably forgot to call you. In my experience they don’t usually give that info over the phone, they usually print it out.
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I’d give a pass being that everyone is so overwhelmed. That’s just me though.
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If your child is happy, leave them where they are happy. I get it, dealing with people who are rude & inconsiderate is annoying, but is that really worth pulling your child from a school?
Take it from someone who moved 25+ times as a child and went to dozens of schools. Leave your children in the school where they are happy and safe. Your feelings should not matter, unless something is hindering the care of your child.
Also, I’d like everyone to think about the hats that most US school front office staff wear. Many schools run without school nurses who can do anything more than prescribe ice/water. Many times these nurses are outnumbered by HUNDREDS of children. So what happens? Front office staff have to substitute. Then you’ve got parents who think they’re the only ones in existence & demand answers/responses immediately from teachers/principal/staff. What about if a child needs checked out/in? Yep! Front office staff. Updating paperwork for your child’s meals? Front office staff. Child needing to make a phone call home? Front office staff. Teachers need assistance from a resource officer? Front office staff. Pages? Front office staff. Counselors are few and far between as well? Front office staff are there to help your kid 9/10, even if it is not their responsibility.
All that on top of staffing shortages, COVID mandates, etc. Let’s not be easy to dismiss someone else’s responsibilities because we have our own.
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Id call the district office and report her.
My children’s schools know I will put them in their place in a heart beat they wanna act sideways with me
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You need to report her to her supervisor immediately! I work at a school and would never treat a parent or anyone in that manner …
Be just as rude back. Some people don’t know that if they can’t take it they shouldn’t dish it out
I think that’s just public schools anymore. They send my daughter home with stuff saying it’s the third notice and I’ve never seen the first two. I think they’re just petty type people
Too bad you don’t have a school secretary like Pam Jackson.
I think u have bigger issues if ur going 2 let 1 person u don’t need 2 speak 2 on a regular basis bother u over ur daughters happiness. Thinking of moving her schools because of 1 rude person u don’t even speak 2 that often is just ridiculous. U may not agree with her personality but it isn’t like it’s her teacher. Ask 2 speak with someone else when u go or simply tell her u don’t appreciate the way she speaks 2 u. It’s just as much ur responsibility 2 check up on things 4 UR kid as it is theirs when asked 2 do something. U have 2 think they have over 200+ students which means 400+ guardians/parents asking them 2 do things on a regular basis plus meetings and daily activities 2 do. Ur child should know their lunch number or u should. Mine takes her lunch but they still sent the lunch number home 4 parent use and 2 make sure child knew it. It would have been curtiuos 2 let u know it was available 2 pick up but what stopped u from picking up ur child that day 2 make sure u got the information or what stoped u from calling later that day?
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Umm be rude right back? If not rude, just be a smart ass
Going forward, email and cc principal.
Honestly me being me, I’m gonna curse her out after a certain point. Don’t be rude and expect respect in return. I say put her in her place and I bet she doesn’t continue 
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You need to contact her supervisor period. Someone like that probably doesn’t need to be working with children anyways.
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I had a similar issue with a teacher last year. I tried to kill her with kindness until one day she met me at the front entrance and started talking really bad and disrespectfully about my son… in front of other parents. I lost my cool and got in her face and explained how she had always been rude and disrespectful and completely unprofessional and she literally ran away into the office. After I blew up on her though she changed her attitude with me and we had no more issues. Some people just need a reality check because “power” gets to their heads and being kind doesn’t always work
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My sons school secretary was like this…. I removed him 6 years ago and we homeschool now (there are other reasons)
I would first off ask if there was anything wrong. Tell her that you feel that all interactions with her are not pleasant and she is quite rude. Ask if there is anything you can do to make speaking with her better. If that doesn’t work, I would email/ speak with the principal about it, if that doesn’t work then I’d go above them. Good luck.
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The lady that did my daughters test thing she had to do online the other day since shes online school as soon as my 6 year old started sounding out the letters to read the word she was moving onto the next question like 10 seconds tops and the math problems some of them I even had to think about and I’m 29 let alone a 6 yr old figuring out stuff like that in 10 seconds
If she treats you like this, how does she treat the kids? Make a report and report her to the school board
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Omg…don’t be so weak minded. Strap up yr boots n put that lady in her place when she messes up n then move on
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Write a little to the Principal, Superintendent and BOE to complain. Other than that, there is Not much you can do.
Tell her to stop being rude
On your next interaction I would simply ask, I’m sorry is there a problem every interaction we have seems to be unpleasant is there an issue we could address? no? then maybe we can act like adults?
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it’s not fair to your child but to base your opinion of the rest of the staff on one " sour puss " isn’t fair to them. she needs to be reported to her superior/ supervisor , verbally and in writing. if that doesnt work , send the letter to the school board and superintendent.
Go onto Aries and get her ID# that way.
If you received her pictures already. Her ID# will on it.
Make an appointment with the school board. This is unacceptable
Yup, I walked up to the desk and let her have it the old school way🤷♀️
I would not ask the secretary nothing about the way she talks to you because she could turn it around on you and say you are the aggressive one. There are apps you can download to your phone to record calls while you talk. Or go to her supervisor and if that doesn’t work go up the latter no one should be in a child environment talking to people like that
If she treat you like that she treats others like that. Start complaining to someone above her
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I have worked with many school secretaries in different levels of the district. Unbelievable what all they accomplish in a day! Be aware that they have to deal with phone calls during dismissal from several parents who are picking their child up or need them to switch to a different bus for after school care, etc. So what may appear to be rudeness is a need to move efficiently from call to call, along with solving other major/minor crises at the same time. I have a lot of respect for these ladies (I’ve never seen a man doing the job). As to the card, there must have been a misunderstanding that you were picking it up for her to have it or else, because it is confidential information she was not able to send home with your child.
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Report her! I worked in a school as an Office Aide for 5 years, the secretary I worked with was just as AWFUL! SHE just miserable mean to everyone, every student and every parent! It just shows how unhappy they are with their life. I would speak to the principal and tell her what is going on. We had many parents complain to our principal. When I left my jobs everyone said its going to be miserable without me, they said I was the sunshine in the office. Report her
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I hate to say this…but you’re not the only parent she deals with everyday. You could’ve gone to office and gotten the number too.
Ask her what her problem is. Be direct. If she says nothing then explain how she’s coming off hostile and you’d like that to change. She probably has to deal with a lot of pissed off parents and it’s wearing her down. But if she doesn’t change her attitude file a complaint with the principal and school board.
I’d give her the benefit of a doubt first then proceed.
I’m always direct 
“please don’t talk to me like xyz” all they ever do is get red and try to back track.
Did you ask her why she seems put out when you talk?
First go to the principal and if that doesn’t help then call the district
Make a complaint to the Priniciple. Let them know they need to train her about customer service or get rid of her… that her attitude stinks. An as much as u want to change skl because of her… you wont… They need to do sumthin about her.
Or maybe ask her what happen you dont like ur job… Then leave cause other ppl is eager to get a job. while she is not srs about hers.
Dude this is coming from someone who works in a school. We are all slammed. Especially the secretaries. They manage so much crap and have so many tasks ots amazing they keep up. She’s probably exhausted and stressed and didn’t remember you needed a call back. Have some patience this pandemic is rough. Especially on schools trying to organize and manage sick students/staff and contact tracing on top of all the other stuff.
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She has the toughest job on campus. They literally run the school. Take her a pie and make an effort. Seriously, it could totally change your relationship. Remember, you catch more flies with super than spice!
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Let her supervisor know.
Omg yes there’s a rude horrible one at my kids school I can’t stand speaking to her!! …seriously who wants a grouchy bitchy Rude lady at there front desk! Especially at a school!
Put her in her place. She’s at a job she should act professional. If she don’t like working w people she needs a new job & I would tell her that!
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We had a vice principle who was so far up herself she was married her kids went to private school I was always polite my son who has asd could not stand her she was purposely stand there and stare at him during a meltdown one day he told her exactly how he feels lol then this lady went through a divorce couldn’t afford to send her children to private school and she became a much nicer person I think it was a big reality check for her
Talk to the vice principal.
Deescalate the situation… The people who are like this for no reason probably need the most kindness…
Why are you calling the school? Other than parent teacher conferences I don’t believe my parents ever had contact with the school in the 12 years I was in there and the same for my kids
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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How to deal with rude school staff? - Mamas Uncut
Call her out on it. Have I done something for you to speak to me so rudely? Have I disrespected you in any way?
She will likely change her tone
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Call her out in person. Don’t do it over the phone. She’ll change her tone and probably be taken back knowing you’ll do it face to face
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I wouldn’t have that job! Parents! She is one person dealing with a million things. Students, staff and parents. Instead of going the negative route, maybe let her know she’s appreciated! Volunteer to help at the office. The pay is pitiful!
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You may be the only “normal” parent she deals with. Try being more kind. Take her some cookies or something when you go pick up the info. You’d be surprised at what the secretaries have to deal with on the regular. Kindness should be your first route.
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I always ask people who are rude to me… “Are you having a bad day, I’m sorry.” Usually, their attitude changes immediately… If not and they ask you why you ask the question… I say, “every time we visit… I get the feeling you are upset with me.”
If those two options do not work, ask to speak to her Principal… Ms Secretary will have an immediate change in personality/attitude or after her principal visits with her, the attitude should change.
I do not think Ms. Secretary realizes she is replaceable and probably has gotten away with this ugliness for entirely too long. .
Good Luck!
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Ask her why, with all due respect, she is so rude all the time. You are an adult you get to ask questions like that.
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Kill it with kindness and respect. You never know what someone else is going through.
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She’s got a boss. They dont know how their staff always is unless told
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Could be just how she is and don’t know she is coming off rude. If it where me I would say something to her first and if it doesn’t help talk to the principal. I am not sure what school but I know many are over staffed and no substitutes to work so everyone is doing multiple jobs
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Please call the school district office and report her. That’s unacceptable and part of her job is to interact with parents.
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She probably is brain dead from all the horrid abuse she puts up with on a daily basis. Try an act of kindness for her. When you give good, you get good.
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My sons math and science teacher I’d extremely rude and out of line on the daily. The boy went 4 years without ever going to the bathroom during school hours because he was afraid to ask. Now that he’s older he finally is asking and his teacher makes him feel like crap because of it. The one time he came back from the bathroom and made a whole discussion about how a human body can go without going to the bathroom for 4-5 hrs. He was mortified. I ended up calling the office and voicing my concerns and the incidents that have happened on the daily and since then things seem to be going okay. Thankfully your child’s actual teacher is good to them. The other staff you don’t have to deal with AS MUCH to want to move schools. I would kill her with kindness and when appropriate and needed I would bring the situation to light with her and kindly ask her what her issue is.
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She has a boss right? Discuss your issues with her superior. Be straight to the point and explain the lack of professionalism and communication worries you, as it’s imperative that you have good rapport with your daughter’s school in all areas. Maybe try to butter her up, take some candy, a flower or some cookies from a nice bakery. Trust me if you do that she won’t forget it and it will get better.
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Same with my son. My son loves his school and teaches but the secretary seems like she has a stick up her butt. I just smile and think happy thoughts lol If our kids are happy that’s all that matters. Good luck!!
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If she really needed the form why didn’t she ride to the school and pick it up???
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Don’t switch schools. Just let her know she can take it down a notch.
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When my son was in school I went through something like that. I recorded her and let her no she was just recorded and told her I was taking this to the News. Her attitude quickly changed and another lady step in and help me. I didn’t want to get my son caught up in this but I had to do something to let her know I wasn’t going to take this from her. I never had to report that and her attitude did a 360. I wanted to beat her down but I didn’t want to embarrass my son. You should talk to someone over her or record her and let her Boss listen…
How many children are in the school? Maybe she was totally overwhelmed that day or she may still be overwhelmed. Schools are understaffed too. If it’s that important you could go pick it up. Chill. If this goes on for 4 months you might have a complaint.
Everyone has a boss. Report here! There is no need for that. Even if someone is going through something, that doesn’t give them a right to take it out on you. After all, you are going through things too.
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