How to open up to my boyfriend? Our culture is different than yours

My question about is that we live in another culture not in west, sorry english is not my first language… we are not open to our boyfriend/ husbands openly like you peoples are… my question is that my boyfriend is not long lasting he finishes too early… i cant get pleasure i feel that if i will talk to him about this his ego will hurt and might our relation ends. so i am afraid of it what is the best way to convey this message silently being telling him… need your opinion. we are not old we both under 30

50 Likes

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How to open up to my boyfriend? Our culture is different than yours - Mamas Uncut

If possible maybe try showing him what you like during sex? If he would allow it and if you’re comfortable. Try “taking control” of the sexual situation and see if he goes along with it? I wish you the best of luck on this.

Teach him what u. Like …

9 Likes

I’d say for you to try clitoris stimulation while he’s in there. Good luck!

3 Likes

Talk to him anyway. If he gets upset about it and it creates problems, he’s not the one

5 Likes

He will last longer further into the relationship. Maybe just try changing positions and alternating speeds. Try being on top and grind your external parts on him slowly. This will help you both!

4 Likes

Lots of foreplay like touching and kissing and dont come off as upset that he cant last long cause that will definitely hurt his ego maybe just talk to him don’t be blunt about it either

Toys or foreplay for you… guys go really fast, it takes us longer.

1 Like

If you don’t feel comfortable being upfront with him, after he’s finished, keep telling him you want more and you’re ready to go again

3 Likes

I understand that it’s hard to talk to someone but he should know that you need more stimulation. Get him to do a little more foreplay and touching to get you aroused more.

Show him what you like by showing how you do it your self tell him you’ll be wetter if he do four play first.

Just be honest but not hurtful.

2 Likes

Just stop when he is about to cum and start talking about his mother. Then he will have to start all over.

1 Like

Foreplay for sure. Maybe take about being open about toys, role playing

1 Like

Go a 2nd round.
Or have him to beat one out before you 2 go at it.

3 Likes

Foreplay, it’s not going to be absolutely amazing the 1st time yous do it, yous need to both learn what each other likes and go from there :blush:

2 Likes

Lots of foreplay. And clitoral stimulation.

Be honest and talk about it and try and ask him to change positions more

Him getting off fast is the highest praise and compliment you can passively receive. Just go again. :roll_eyes:

8 Likes

I literally would just say “hey I’m not done yet, want to go again?”

6 Likes

Talk him through it while it’s happening.

Maybe try going ontop & tell him too tell you when he’s gonna cum & then stop when he’s about too & just say not yet wait a few seconds then keep pumping
Try doing it doggy & playing with you’re clitoris at the same time.

It takes the average woman 20 minutes of stimulation (not internal) to reach an Orgasm remember that when doing foreplay.

2 Likes

Foreplay, and get on top of him.

2 Likes

My husband & I are muslim. Talking about sex is supposedly a taboo, but we do talk about it. We are open & honest about it. We’re 40yrs old & we still can’t keep our hands off each other :face_with_hand_over_mouth::shushing_face:

ok first off OLD at 30 :flushed: lol

11 Likes

I’m just sorry for the laughing emojis here. Westerners can be very rude.

Gently guide him and help him understand without words

Spike him with viagra :joy:

7 Likes

Have him eat you out for a long long time until he gets the message. Woman need pleasure as much as men. My culture is also pretty traditional, however it doesn’t stop me from sitting on my man’s face

29 Likes

he needs to get one out before yall even really start…that should help

2 Likes

Introduce toys 4 you maybe? Make shore there’s alot of foreplay before hand so you don’t end in disappointment. Maybe just bring up the idea of maybe getting you a vibrator to spice things up :woman_shrugging: Or just spike his drink with some viagra lol

3 Likes

Be patient. You rock his world and surely he knows it’s a quicky and feels bad. Maybe explain the cultural difference and it’s super hard to open up and talk. So ask him if he has any complaints or desires he would like to talk about. :blush:

1 Like

I don’t want to be mean but he is selfish.

4 Likes

They way I see it… and my grandma is the weirdo that shared this knowledge with me…

If you can put his penis in your mouth, you can tell him what’s bothering you…

If you can have sex… you have already seen, shared, and experienced something more intimate than a conversation… so you can do it…

Now, with that said… I’m kinda mean… I’ll flat-out say “you got to get off, but I didn’t. Round 2 or next time you should masturbate about 30 minutes beforehand”

I’m down for quickies and even just pleasuring him and going without on occasion… but i will promise you, I’ll be on top next time and I will STOP everything and ask a stupid random question if he’s getting too close and I’m not ready :woman_shrugging:

Just tell him the truth!! Or else u will never be satisfied :woman_shrugging:t4: for that u might as well be single. Shit get u a :rose: toy

You must be truthful! Or the relationship will never work.
Be Blessed & Never Stressed :pray:

1 Like

Bite him and scratch his back. A little pain stimuli but not enough for it to hurt will help him to last longer. Another thing you could do is ride him. Be on top and it will allow you to adjust him better to your liking. You could also pleasure yourself before having sex warm up the engine. Watching porn together also can help get it going. Best wishes girl get your orgasm!

Yeeeeeeees some foreplay and hop up on top!!!

1 Like

You can slow things down. When he gets close. …stop…and do something a little less exciting. Can you take control? He may just need more practice lol. Or encourage him to pleasure you first…then you are closer to finishing at the same time ?

2 Likes

I hope there is an admin watching these posts and deleting the heinously mean responses. How cruel you all are to laugh at someone’s pain.

10 Likes

Take it as a compliment :joy:

1 Like

If you can’t open up to him now it will effect you later.

4 Likes

Dudes can’t help if they blow early. Most times. But foreplay take time with foreplay. Take it slower when yah know doing it.

Tell him to jerk off in the bathroom before hand

1 Like

Yeah fore play for you will definitely help. Also toys :100: are AWESOME. I’ve got 5 different ones depending on mood, time we have etc that are great. Look into Nora (a bit pricey) but she makes me see stars! Another one I have that I actually use on the go more often then not is called Tracy’s dog (I know funny name) and a little one paired with a dildo but I can’t remember the name. It’s for clit stimulation.

Regardless of culture norms you need to talk about it. Take an approach that emphasizes you want more of him rather than saying he isn’t enough.
You also need to learn how you can get off on your own so you can show him what you need.

3 Likes

Masturbate after you have sex. In front of him. :woman_shrugging::rofl:

Does he give you oral pleasure? Ask him to try. I know not all people are into this but it would definitely help you get to where you need to be

5 Likes

Take control of the situation, use lots of foreplay, if you pay attention you can typically tell when hes getting close and then you can change things up to help postpone it. And or bring toys.

2 Likes

Girl. Let’s talk about foreplay ….
Let’s be mature about this when he’s about to finish, STOP. Just touch a bit. Then continue. THEN STOP as soon as he gets close again. Then maybe eat. If ya know what I mean. We all get a lil hungry. Anyway then go at it again. You on top. Flip around. Then to the side. STOP AGAIN.
Lmao :joy:
Alright u get the point.
It’s basically a game of red light, green light.

7 Likes

Maybe have him give you oral sex before he begins.

You can’t talk to him over that because you think your relationship will end? If you can’t talk about that how are you going to talk about more serious stuff like marriage and kids when the time comes?

6 Likes

Egos have no room in relationships. Talk to him, if he doesnt care about your feelings then he is not worth to keep

7 Likes

You have to be able to talk about this or the relationship aint even gonna work out, suggest some foreplay, take a turn on top, try new things and maybe look up tips and tricks to help him last a little longer

I Wish limp penises on all the people who laughed at her post

37 Likes

Try going about it of asking for more foreplay instead of talking about how long he last. My husband doesn’t last very long. He used to but now we have two kids and don’t have much time for sex so when we finally do he gets off quickly but he focuses a lot doing oral on me before to make sure I’m satisfied. Also he knows he doesn’t last very long and will apologize after but he doesn’t need to. He’s totally fine and really likes pleasing me so he is fine with doing longer foreplay before.

If he bust fast he fuckin something else girl lol

Sex toys, you can use them on you, or he can. If you slow down, take breaks or switch position it can delay his orgasm. Or depending on his sex drive and how long it takes him to get another erection, you could give in a blow job, and cuddle, show him how you like being touched, with your hands or his. And then go at it again, usually second orgasm takes longer. Don’t make it be criticism, make it sexy suggestions. Touch me here. Bite me there. Oh, try that harder. It’s about the approach.

Foreplay and toys. And have an honest conversation about your needs and expectations. I find it easier to get the words out via text.

Show him how to touch and pleasure you by masteurbating in front of him. This may make you uncomfortable at first, but you should never feel ashamed of your own need for pleasure. You can also rub your clitoris while on top of him or in the doggie style position. This may make you feel less vulnerable and still provide you the ability to climax.

2 Likes

Giiirl communication is key! How is he supposed to know anything if your to scared to talk to him. If your afraid your gonna hurt his ego then maybe he’s not the right guy.

ask for something that will pleasure you specifically. buy a vibratory to help you finish a little faster.

3 Likes

I understand u. But u can’t suffer in silence speak up so he knows