I would lock the door change the locks if you have to and say of your not home by this time you’re screwed
If she being abusive you can ring the cops anscthey can remove her
And yes here where I am you can absolutely kick her out.
Call the laws on her everytime she doesn’t come home. Keep a record. See what else you can do about her behavior tell the cops how she is.
Call cops and have her removed.
Since, she is still underaged and “you cannot kick her out”. We’ll leave her rebel butt with 3 pairs of clothes and take everything out of her room. She cannot come and go or she sleeps outside!
If it still doesn’t work then call the laws on her. There is program’s that will help her and hopefully cops will help guide you. Ask the school counselor. I remember they took me to a youth detention center! To see how it was and I had older kids in my face!
I’d go ask the court for options as well! Good luck!
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It kinda sounds like you’re saying screw it, we are old and don’t have the energy to deal with you, so you’re on your own. It’s not HER fault you had her late in life. There are many resources out there and you just leaving her out on her ass is NOT gonna give her a good start in life and you’re setting her up for failure.
I grew up in foster care and personally have four children, one of which has MANY violent issues and several behavioral diagnoses, including childhood bipolar. We are busting our butts to get him the help he needs before he’s out of our house. I can’t imagine just saying screw you, you’re on your own when the kid is still just that…a KID.
Also, while writing on her bedroom wall is disrespectful, that’s not out of control 
You can call the state and have her removed.
If you can’t kick her out because she keeps saying shes not 18 treat her like a kid take her stuff away when she leaves out of her room then tell her since your not 18 we can take whatever we want and give her some if her own medicine when she flips call the cops some times kids just need to be shown what it feels like
You can charge her with destroying your property and send her to juvy.
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Not sure what country your in but in Australia the can go at 16.
You can’t kick her out and are responsible for her till she’s 18 im afraid. I know I’ve dealt with similar and now my daughter is 19 and doing great. It’s stressful but trust me you have to persever. The police will only refer you to social services who will refer her to different groups ect (not helpful) soundsike all she wants is some love and attention and seems your concentration is on the grandkids so she’s rebelling x
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No you can’t kick her out, but I sure as hell would put my foot down. No phone, no nothing, ground her, w.e. She leaves? Report her as a runaway
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I wasn’t nearly as bad i just didnt pay my portion of the cell phone bill bc my work cut my hours and i got kicked out at 16. Kick her out! She’ll fend for herself. Might not be the choices you would make but you can’t let one child disrupt your entire household. She’s not 5 she’s 17, kick her out.
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Some of these comments 
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Sounds like a brat that needed her tail tore up years back.
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You can also put her ass in a residential treatment facility since shes under 18. Do it. Believe me she’ll straighten up.
Hire me BET she won’t act like that again. I don’t deal with ANY disrespect even if it’s to someone else. My kids know if I catch it, there’s never good that comes from it
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Take out beyond parental control charges.
There is a reason for her behavior. Please don’t toss her out. Her life will get worse. She needs love and Unconditional positive regard. I can not believe the amount of people who advise to just toss her away. It really breaks my heart. I work with a lot of troubled teens in Saginaw, Michigan. Unconditional love and constant positive regard works. She won’t have a chance at all if you just give up on her. 
she needs to be in counseling.
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I practically did the same thing when I was about 18 except the wall thing. My mother told me to sit on the hallway as in like a time out, it didn’t work. I did call her a bit at some point but not all the time. Now I’m older, I understand why I did these things. I blamed her for leaving dad, I didn’t want to live with her and I hated her for it. She might just be dealing with some shit. Sit her down, ask wtf and try and figure it out.
There are laws to protect you too. Call the cops on her, parental abuse is against the law.
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Absolutely can… My brother went to a group behavioral home when he was 15 and was put in state custody until he was 19 but was supposed to be until he was 21 but he screwed u all the things they were trying to help him with. He was way out of control…angry and violent and caused hell for my family and grandparents.
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She’s your child, how do you give up on them when they need you the most?
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Why are the only options let her do whatever she wants or kick her out?!
Hell no kick her ass out give her an eviction notice and tell her to take it to court if she is not going to abide by your rules she needs to go bottom line OUT SHE GOES
Yes ma’am you can put her out. You deserve respect! You can also tell she has 3 choices behave, move out, or let the law escort her to juvenile hall. My Mama “God rest her soul” used to say she brought us into this world and she could take us out.lol Praying for you.
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Get her emancipated (you can do that at 16 most places I believe) and kick her out
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I’d like to know how old the boyfriend is and if his parents know she is spending the night??? His parents must want a grandbaby really bad to allow their sons girlfriend to spend the night. She thinks because your older she can walk all over you. I would make her little rant of “I’m 17 and you can’t kick me out” backfire on her! She ain’t 18 yet either so what you say goes!!! Every single damn time she leaves that house you call the police to pick her up, depending on how old the boyfriend is she what you can do legally about that situation, and by the way her ass would be getting birth control too!!! Embarrass the shit out of her!!! And give her nothing!! Provide the worst food she hates! What about her skipping school??? You can definitely get someone involved if she is missing school. Talk to her school also about her behavior there. Ask about boarding.schools! God bless you hun. As taking care of her isn’t enough your also got your 4 grandchildren!!! God love ya!
I agree with Michelle khan … granted she’s disrespectful and obviously spoiled and acting out and rebellious. But kicking her out will cause more harm than good. She needs discipline and direction.
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But her in a girls home for a while let her see how she likes that
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She keeps being unruly and out past curfew which is set for minors by the city and county you’re in call the cops if you know where she is tell them and they will drag her ass home. She keeps doing it she’ll go to juvy. She needs a hard snack on the ass and a quick reality check. Take away privileges like her car, cell phone, etc. if she can’t pay for it on her own take it. If she has a job let her know it’s only because you allow her to because she is a minor make her quit. You’ve got to put your foot down.
Take away all make up , all clothing -go to goodwill get a few old dresses for her to wear , take away cell phones, and clean out room except for a mattress and blanket . This will work or she will leave on her own .
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Is she your own kid or your grand kid? Obviously circumstances have an impact…
if she’s your kid I would say that she needs to go. If she’s your grand kid and has been through a rough time I’d be more lenient but give her final warnings
She’s a child that from the sound of it hasn’t gotten her ass beat enough.
You’re the example of all these parents that don’t swat their kids on their asses. I assume that’s why you’re rasing your grandchildren too.
Ummmm, you can take her ass down to your local dhr or DHS and tell them what she’s doing and saying and tell them that either they help you find a way to fix this or she can be their problem. Get her emancipated your self and kick her out. Or whoop her ass. Take everything she owns, go and get her some cheap hand me downs that she won’t like. Give her ONLY things she needs. Bare essentials. And no more boyfriend. That’s what I’d do.
If you live in the state of Georgia a girl is declared an adult at the age of 17. And I don’t mean to sound ugly but kick the trash to the curb call the law and have her put out
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Bag up her stuff & take somewhere where she can’t get back. Strip her room of only a mattress & set ground rules. She behaves to to earn any privilege back.
And make sure she is on birth control.
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If shes staying at her bf house most nights anyway id just drop all her stuff of over there and let him take care of her.
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You cannot kick her out…but you can file unruly child charges on her and have her put in juvenile detention. I’m sure it only make things worse though. You ever try and get her into counseling??
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Depends on your state, if she’s had children and grandchildren you mentioned are hers, seek a hearing and she’s gone and you have kids. Sounds like you haven’t followed through with putting your foot down or there’s drugs involved. Time to step up and be serious, you’re job as a parent is to prepare them for the real world, not be their friend or welcome mat. I’m not trying to be a butt, but get it together.
Not sure what state your in but in NY you would need to go to court to evict not sure if she needs to be done w H.S or 18
Okay…she’s almost an adult. It does not matter if she’s at a bfs house. All teens swear. Art is not “drawing on the wall” if you have a problem with it buy her a damn easel. She’s still you’re child and if you kick her out you’re a shitty person and she deserves better than you.
Some of these comments sadden me. That child needs guidance and somebody to help them at a very vulnerable age. Not to be kicked out, and made to feel alone, and a burden 
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I would contact child services and have them put her in juvie and prove to her that she can’t run your house she’s old enough that you can do that.
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Give her a foot up the arse and call docs to take her. If they won’t kick her out as she is over 16.
Try working it out with your daughter . It sounds like she needs a lot of loving . I can’t believe you are giving up on your own daughter !!! SHE’S 16 !!! She’s going through teenage stuff … Help her ! Don’t make her feel unwanted !! You are the ADULT !
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Pay her more attention
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For the love of God… do not kick her out. All that’s going to happen to her is either she ends up pregnant and in an abusive relationship she can’t get out of it turns to hard drugs or even both. You need to alert an authority that she keeps leaving and she’s that age. I’m pretty sure there is some place you can send her too to straighten her out. Her behavior is unacceptable but do not, do not quit on your children.
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Don’t enable her…tough times call for tough love…call the police when she’s out of control and vandalizing your home PLUS she’s endangering the other children in the home so you could always call CPS and have them come out…also if you both are scared…praying for you I’ve seen too many of these same situations on Datelines and crime shows and sometimes the outcome is someone getting seriously injured or death…better to b safe than sorry but don’t let her get away with it because God forbid when she gets out into society among us all she needs help now…Good Luck to u both
She’s acting out bc she wants your attention
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Invent a time machine, go back in time, have an abortion. Problem solved
have you tried therapy? Is she using drugs or alcohol? She sounds like me as a teen and I was a hot mess, into a bunch of crap. Sounds like something is definitely wrong. Hope things improve for you both
Praise her when she’s being good and file child out of parental control paperwork at juvinile court
Call her social worker at school and get counseling set up
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Send her to boot camp
I would try to find out what is going on with my daughter to cause this behavior. I have a 15 year old daughter and can’t imagine kicking her out. In my opinion nothing good will come out of doing that.
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She’s angry at you guys for something and you have to open yourselves up to that and work thru it as a family
I’ve been there and I’ve done this
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I’d kick her ungrateful ass out. No questions asked. Show her how to fend for herself since she wants to pretend like she’s an adult. My parents had to do that to me when I was that age. I was an asshole and very disrespectful towards my parents. I also drank and smoked too at that age. I tried to be an adult. Got a taste of adulthood at a young age. I matured up when I hit 18-19. Now I am not an whole, I respect my parents, I’m now almost 25 with a 2 year old who I’m trying to raise better than how I acted. I’m completely ashamed how I acted at that age because I was not raised that way at all and I could choke any teenager or adult who acts out like that cause I been there. It’s not cute!
You dont throw away your child now that you have grandchildren. You raised her to be who she is. If you do not like her behavior be the adult and do things to change it. First how she speaks to you is learned so I would start there. No one can learn if they can not hear. Start talking not yelling. Second she maybe acting up because she’s feeling replaced by grandchildren. We all know they are treated differently then our own kids. Next boyfriend and her staying the night with him. No way would this happen you are a parent call the police and drag her butt home she doesn’t belong doing this. After enough times of being embarrassed she wont do it or the police will take over and turn it over to juvenile authorities. Writing on walls hand her cleaner, rag and scrubbing items stand there till it’s gone. Learn the word no and use it. Be the parent a child can not learn if they are not taught appropriate behavior. If this does not help call your local Department of Human Services and get them to help with her. I dont know why kids these days are entitled to a different standard then how we were raised. We’ve lost respect and accountability with a lot of kids and its due to how they are raised. People need to start being parents if they are going to have kids.
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i cant lie i was a pretty horrible teen. my mom has called the cops on me a few times…don’t be afraid to do that. or look to see if there is something like beyond scared straight at a prison 🤷🏼
Contact your local juvenile officer I went through some of the stuff with my son legally you can’t kick her out at this age but when she turns 17 she is legally a adult but keep in mind you are still responsible for her until she turns 18 there are places you can call to have her picked up and put in a faculty where she will be evaluated ik this for a fact because I had it done to my son the juvenile officer should be able to help you in that area although I knew where to call also you can call the police for destruction of property and she can be taken to juvenile jail and be appointed a juvenile officer I’m sure things vary from state to state but honestly I would start with the police what ever you do leave the walls the way she vandalized them that way the police can see hitting you or your husband is considered adult abuse please take action immediately other wise it will only get worse and if her boyfriend is 17 or older report to police believe me this will be one of the hardest things you will do but in the long run it will benefit I wish you the best oh and what ever you do don’t let her know what your up to let it be a surprise and one more thing when she is gone do a complete room search if you happen to find anything save for the police
It’s called discipline and make her listen to you. No way will my daughter disrespect me like that. It’s your fault if you allow her to be like that. Who’s the parent?!
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Why would you want to kick her out .?
My mom really fucked with me kicking me out all the time growing up, making me feel unwanted and like she gave up on me cuz I was an “out of control” teenager. You do realize it is NORMAL as a teenager to rebel. This is ridiculous. Grow up ! You’re 64 acting 6. No wonder she rebels? Look at the way you treat her.
Put her in JDC til she’s 18!!!..my kids have never disrespected me. I made sure of that as they were growing up.
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No she got the wrong I’m for divorce her ,that’s what kids do to the parents,call welfare tell the she to bad to be around your grand let the state take her out of YOUR HOME BAD INFLUENCE AROUND CHILDREN
My dad got kicked out young. My mom got kicked young too as far as I know. Sooooo…lol
Do what you feel is best for your other children and grandchildren. She should not feel she can do you and your husband that way. If you can find her a place to go then I would send her there for awhile and let her see what she is doing is wrong. Maybe have a officer speak to her and see how that does.
Time for tactics… Meaning show her the difference between wants and needs, show her the outcomes of negative behavior hell drive her around and show her the real world, then sit Down with her and let her spill her guts out, let her scream,cry even laugh. …the point. Is she is holding On to that last piece and it won’t be long before She breaks. She is hurting and you are Too because. U think there is nothing u can do to stop her pain.
They’ll put her in girls til she’s 18 with their rules
Go to court say u cannot control.the childs behavior an ensure the other childrens safety as well as her own they will take custody of her I just has to do it with my son an hes now in a group home an has 1 overnight on weekends
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Take her to a therapist.
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It is too late. First time she cussed me, she would be looking for her teeth.
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Sounds like it is probably learned behavior. Parents that end up raising grandchildren is usually because of poor parenting. And everyones age has a big factor to play in this too. Most 16 year olds don’t have their siblings 4 kids living with them and have parents in their 30’s or 40’s. The whole family could use counseling to help make changes for the better. Jmo… Good luck & God bless!
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Use tough love and really mean it.
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I was 14 when my parents got custody of 4 of their grandkids. I didn’t get rebellious, but I can easily see how some kids in that position could have. She might be acting out because she’s mad at you guys for giving (necessary) attention to the grandkids, that she desperately wants. Kicking her out won’t solve whatever issues she’s having. I’d get her some counseling ASAP.
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If she is going to live under your roof she will live under your rules. I had a friend like this and she refused to listen so they took extra measures by taking her door off the hinges or taking away things that weren’t necessary like all of her shoes and clothes they gave her outfits that weren’t appealing for her style, put parental locks on all of her devices and what not. At the time we all thought her parents were just crazy but it turned out the boy she was running around with got arrested for heroine a couple years later. Some times drastic times call for drastic measures…
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Its called unruly and she can b locked up for it. She’s not respecting you so dont feel bad about kicking her out
Call her on run if she dont come home when she should be
Please don’t shove religion in her face or just give up. It’ll only make it worse. Tell her you won’t kick her out but she needs to play by your rules. Ground her. Being brat? No tv. Sneaking out? Put bells on the door and nail the window shut. Get her in with a good therapist that can help her.
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Kate, first off is this your daughter or granddaughter? It sounds like this girl has had a rough first 16 years and is desperately asking for help in anyway she knows how. Unfortunately that is in a destructive way. Her staying at her boyfriends house is likely going to lead to unplanned pregnancy at a young age which will cause a lot more problems for her and likely for you as well. I highly suggest you helping this girl instead of trying to find ways to kick her out. I understand that you are at your wits end here with her behavior but it sounds like she needs a lot of love and direction. I suggest counseling for her and for you and your husband with how to deal with her. Also I would take away everything you provide for her besides necessities. She needs a mattress, simple clothes, food, and that’s about it. Remove all electronics, no phone for her, remove her door even. She gets things back as she earns respect and trust. Build the relationship back up. Don’t allow her to stay the night with the boyfriend and anytime she doesn’t come home at curfew call and report her missing or as a runaway. That will stop her behavior. Don’t give up on her please. You could be saving this girls life.
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You don’t deserve her if you want to kick her out. You need to toughen up and be a parent, and not want to kick her out and give up just because she’s a rebellious 16 year old.
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Some of you people shouldn’t have kids. The first sign of trouble and wanna toss them in a fucking home
It doesn’t matter what you do or say it take away it’s not gonna change. Call the cops. Or put her in an alternative learning center.
I agree with a girls home
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i dont think any one under stands she will bust doors down bust windows out any thing to cost us money
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Thats heartbreaking. Keep yo head up. Convince her to spend more nights at the boyfriends 
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I would beat her ass sorry NOT sorry 
She’s acting out because she’s going through something. No kid is “just bad”. Talk to her- put her in therapy. There’s nothing wrong with a little bit of tough love, but abandoning her when she needs you the most is plain wrong. as a teenager, I went through a rebellious stage, but was given the help I needed and turned my life around. She feels unloved possibly? Ignored? It doesn’t make you a bad mother, but children are difficult. Ground her, take her things. But don’t put her out on the street- that WOULD make you a bad mother.
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Kick her out. In fact, charge her with destruction of property and have the police remove her.
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She needs love. You may need to try another approach. I know she is being stubborn and it’s hard for you to understand her ways, but it seems like she is compensating for something else. She is looking for love in other ways and thinks she knows it all, but she does not and you can’t let her think she does. Maybe you could do a family night once a week and go from there. Possibly board games and movies. Allow her to make a dinner of her choice. Let her buy all the stuff and just stand with her to help her with anything, as guidance. Don’t force her, but be stern with her and do instill some rules or discipline bc I wasn’t very disciplined as a child and now that I’m older I wish I had. I too started looking for love in wrong ways. The guy she is with is probably no good for her. She may be feeling left out because of the grand kids… maybe you could give her a responsibility with one of the children. Maybe drive the child to their lessons or take them to the store once a week. Giving her that freedom and responsibility may be good for her. She may grow a bond with one of the kids. And she may start to respect you when she sees how hard it is to help take care of a child. I know it’s hard, but don’t give up. And I know your age may hold you back in some aspects, but that’s actually a good thing bc she can do some things on her own… just allowing you to watch from the stands if ya know what I mean. It could get worse and go south real quick if you kick her out. She may turn to drugs or some other rebellious acts. I had friends like that. She may fight you at first for a month or so with these responsibilities, but she will begin to respect you again when she sees all the children can be overwhelming and stressful. She sounds like she needs some tough love. Don’t give up please. It may seem like she’s acting out, but really she needs some attention and maybe it’s not going to be easy and she might hate you for it, but I promise it will pay off. She needs some help. Maybe you could take her to a makeup store or one of her favorite clothing stores and allow her to buy one item of her choice. Just help her love herself again because it sounds like she is going through something and she might not be letting you in. Teenage years are tough years. There’s a lot of confusion and hormones. Just don’t give up.
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Lock all of the food in the house and only let it be used for the grandkids and yourself only let you and your significant other have a key lock the home doors at certain hours so if she comes home late she isn’t aloud in or she is but phone is locked away for how many hours she was late but in days.
Have her taken out for incordiability
If she wants to act like a brat an say you can’t kick her out then send her to juvi. It worked for my sister.
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Why would you be trying to kick your own child out instead of trying to find a solution for her rebellion? Most teens are rebellous, defiant and destructive. However this sounds like she is going through something and does not have the tools to communicate it. You can’t just get rid of them bc of it. Try therapy and other interventions.
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Therapy. She could have something mental health wise going on. She may even need medication.
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Put her on Scared Straight show, I know there’s still boot camps to send teens to. Curfews are still a thing she can be called in on.
You can send her off. Call a juvenile office.
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Yeah send her to a treatment facility
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I don’t feel there is enough information here. Is she going through things at school? At home? Being a teenager and thinking you know what you’re doing even though you’re mind isn’t fully developed to make adult decisions can be tough. I was a disobedient teen and I was dealing with a lot at home and in school. My parents split up when I was 13. My mom was super hard on me after I started my period at 11. Always afraid I was gonna get raped or pregnant. Now as an adult I understand where she was coming from but she went about it in so many wrong ways. She didn’t speak to me with respect and try to have adult conversations with me to find out what’s wrong it was always just “you’re bad”, you’re punished this way n that way. I didn’t feel like I could talk to anyone or anyone understood. Maybe try seeking counseling and find out the underlying issue. She’s acting out for a reason
Try and understand her and be there for her. I was a teenager who snuck out to be with my boyfriend. I never tried to take over my dads house or tried to write on walls though. I was the way i was because i wasnt getting the love i needed at home where my dad and stepmom were. They werent there for me like they should have been so my boyfriend was the person i resulted too. I dont know. Maybe try and sit her down and talk with her and you guys can put your feelings out on the table. Thats something i really wish my father would have done with me. If that doesnt work, maybe you can talk to a family member about taking her in or sending her off somewhere.