I’m having a baby shower in a few weeks this is my second child. Big brother is 4 years old. He is very excited to be a big brother. But he gets jealous when we buy things for the baby and not him. I’m worried that when it comes time for the baby shower he will be jealous because obviously the gifts will be for baby and not him. We plan on buying him a special toy that he can open up at the shower, and he will help open presents for the baby. Any other moms experience this and have tips/tricks to help?
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I would go to the dollar store and buy some toys or things just for him to open for himself. Or you could always tell people you are interested in matching big bro stuff for baby too
Yes! My oldest is4 youngest will be 2 in October and currently pregnant. If we attend birthday parties or anything hes upset it isnt for him. I let him open my mothers day present… Lol
If it were my child I would explain to them that a party was held for him before he was born so he already had his turn. You will get toys on your birthday and Christmas.
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Telling him he had 1 when he was in your belly and now its the baby in your bellys turn?
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My youngest brother is 7 years younger than me. And my other brother and I got gifts when my mom had her baby shower. When I had my second my daughter was just over a year and a half old and got a lot of attention and helped us open the baby’s gifts. It’s all about making sure he doesn’t feel forgotten
My daughter will be 4 in September and I had her baby sister in April. We had a smaller shower because she’s my second, but a couple people brought things for my older daughter as well as baby! She was so happy. She got a big sis book and a new outfit and a couple other things, but she also loved helping open baby’s things
I would get him one special gift for being the big brother and let him help open the baby gifts. Explain to him the concept of the baby shower.
I wouldn’t do any more than that.
In my opinion kids should understand or be taught that they dont always get something and everything isnt always about them.
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Have him help open gifts…buying gifts when it’s not his event will teach him to expect gifts all the time…my son and first daughter are 4 years apart and he adjusted
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I would tell him that it is his siblings turn and that he had his turn when he was in your belly. Maybe have him pick out something for the baby from him and then make sure that the baby has a present waiting for him at the hospital when they meet for the first time. I hope this helps. I didn’t have a shower with my second and I’m not having one with my third either, so this is the only thing that I can think of…
You’re creating a monster, sorry not sorry. That child is old enough to hear the word NO it’s a whole sentence no explanation required!
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GOOD LUCK! I have a stepson that is 6 and he was really excited through the whole pregnancy then once my son was born he has been a giant asshole. So let me know if you learn any tricks and I’ll do the same. Lol
I’ve taught my children that if it isnt your birthday or Christmas or some kind of special occasion that they dont get anything. Not to be mean or hurtful just so they can learn when they go to other kids parties or anything of the sort that’s it’s okay theyll have their turn to open presents but this time it’s not their turn. They’re all 3 okay with it. They just wanna see what was unwrapped.
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We gor my old gifts for her to open had grandparents bring something small to she felt included and happy she got stuff to
Let him wear a big bro shirt. Make him proud. Make him involved:)
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I would let him be involved in decorating and purchasing things that the baby needs. You dont have to buy him things to distract him from the new baby stuff. Just involve him! It will make all the difference in the world
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Same as the other ladies. He is old Enough to learn he doesn’t always get what other do. Be ready for him to cry and through a fit but he’ll get over it. Honestly if he would act like that I would get a sitter for the shower.
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I just had my baby shower last weekend my daughter is 7 she hasn’t really complained or made a big deal or shown much jealousy but when we buy baby stuff I always include her I have her help me pick out baby items and outfits and talk with her all the time about the baby coming and at our baby shower I allowed her to help open gifts and put things away
I once went to a baby shower where the mother asked for everyone to bring the older child a gift as well as a baby shower gift. The older child was too busy running around and playing with other kids the whole time, she never even opened her gifts.
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Not sure if your at this stage…but we gave our 4 yr old daughter a new carseat for “big sisters” at our baby shower worked a treat…probably helped that she had the biggest present too lol
Yes my daughter had same issue with middle son when baby came.
Let him open up gifts with you at the baby shower. They really just enjoy opening things lol
My oldest son was 7 when I was pregnant with my 5 month old. Sometimes he would get upset when we went shopping for the baby because he wanted things too. We told him, the baby has nothing yet. The baby needs these things, and he has everything he needs.
The 4 year old will get over it. Its only gonna get tougher if you don’t explain to him now.
I always brought the siblings their own gift. Maybe mention it to aunts/grandparents. It’s a tough transition
Get him some stickers and have him pick a sticker for each gift and have him put one on each so he can take part but knows everyone including him are doing this for the baby . Get easy to remove stickers , it will make him feel he has a job , he can be actively involved and concentrate on what sticker to pick instead of being jealous. Brain trick it works .
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We did a Big Brother day and made sure he was included in everything! Changing diapers, helping pick clothes etc. He got a movie date and a lego set before hand. ( had a csection) so planned it all out
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Let him know how proud u r of him. Encourage him to help you with chores now.Say ,oh my goodness I really needed your help. Talk about how he’ll help by being the big brother. How proud of him you are. Yes the gift for him to open at your showers a wonderful idea. They have to grow up so fast these days. Let him enjoy his childhood. You got this Momma.
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When I attend a baby shower and there is an older sibling I always bring a little gift for big brother or sister
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Not sure why big bro coming to shower ?hire sitter or great time for dad an son outing but I’m old .but we also only had one shower for first kid
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Buy him a gift and tell him its from his sibling.
When we had my baby shower for my son my daughter was 6 and a lot of people bought gifts for her too just to make her feel special, she always helped me open gifts and I asked her if she thought her baby brother would like them. We also let her play the games which helped because she was included, we let her help decorate also
I personally wouldnt because they start to expect it with every gift… I got 4 kids so yeah…
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Just get him a few gifts. Tell him its a big brother party! Make him involved in everything.
This is a great time to teach him it’s not all about him anymore
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My daughter is 4 and I’m expecting in December. A fee of my close friends are getting her a little something even if it’s just a coloring book and crayons to be given to her at the baby shower. I am having some matching outfits made for her and the baby that will be presented to her then as well.
Yes let him open presents and you do the cards. Maybe he would like to make a treat with you so he can be proud and get some attention with that.
Definitely have a gift for him, but not sure I would let him open all the baby gifts too. Its important for him to know that mom and dad get to open some and it’s a celebration for everyone, not all about him. Hes gonna feel jealous, that’s normal. Teach him to work through it, don’t enable it. I saw someone else suggest that maybe you don’t even have him there. Hope it goes well, enjoy your shower 
Have him help you opening the gifts for baby. But i wouldn’t give him a gift everytime theirs something for baby… He will expect it. Use this as a learning lesson that baby will get things and he will get things- it wont always be the same.
Take time to do 1 on 1 with him now and after baby is born so he doesnt resent the baby or get too jealous.
He needs to learn that not every thing is about him. The worst thing you can do is gift a child on occasions that are not for them. It makes them feel entitled for now on. And honestly 9/10 makes a very spoiled brat no offense.
He will learn better if you teach them everyone even baby has their own day just as he does for his birthday and such. You can accomplish this life lesson and give him joy and peace to understand it as he learns. Give him his time when it’s his turn. Not everything is about him. But it wouldn’t hurt to give him a big brother shirt to wear to the shower or something like that. To let him feel part of the day and occasion.
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I got a baby doll for my boy and made a big deal about it and he would play with the baby and I’d teach him how to be gentle etc. He loved it and it really helped him get ready for his first sibling! I did that with all 3 of my kids and I honestly think it helped tremendously. When they feel in control, its empowering for them.