I am concerned to give birth again: Advice?

I am more so looking for some advice or if someone has any similar situation. I currently have a 3 year old son and just found out I’m pregnant again, I’m extremely scared at the moment because of how traumatic my labour was last time around as well as the pregnancy. Well when I first fell pregnant I had just over come anorexia nervosa, which is an eating disorder. When I fell pregnant I was 42 kilos and it was suppose to be treated as high risk. I had many problems throughout the pregnancy that the doctors never treated or did anything about it, I just dealt with it because I had no idea what to do, some of these problems included having pre eclampsia which they passed off as not being serious it got that bad that I still suffer from it, I had severe hip pain which they said was normal but just before birth I found out it was a small crack in my pelvis, had sever pains in abdomal wall area, I ended up with a hernia and all these other problems they palmed off as nothing. During birth they left me alone in the room and tried to tell me I wasn’t allowed anyone in the room, when I went into full on labour they walked out and didn’t come back till his head was pretty much out they wouldnt give me any pain meds nothing, I fainted twice during and they still didn’t come, by then I had blood everywhere it was dripping off the bed onto the floor, my son had cord rapped around his neck and almost died because of there neglect then when he was born they didn’t notice I had a hemorrhage until I went blue and started falling unconscious. They only noticed when the doctor came in and started screaming, three hours later and I couldn’t even see and they told my partner to get all the family around just in case, then after all of that and I finally was able to comprehend it all my hip was even worse, had a scan and it had cracked more, also in my medical records it stated that from measuring my sons growth they said he would weigh around 6 pound, he came out 9 pound 10 ounces, that’s why it cracked more and now I suffer and sometimes can’t walk because of it, and after all that I was bed bound for 5 days then when they finally help me out of bed I physically could not hold myself up I fell and hit my head on the tiles, the doctor came again only to find out I had a 7 finger split down my abdominal wall and an umbilical hernia, the list goes on and but I’d like to hear other people’s stories and how they cope and how they deal with being pregnant again, I’d also like to know if there is anyone else that gets physically sick from the thought of a c section to the point of almost passing out as I can’t cope thinking of that. Thanks so much and appreciate any advice xx


Don’t go back to that place and I would have sued them for malpractice find a good doctor and maybe a therapist to help you get through it


Definitely don’t go to that hospital/doctor see someone else x

I was high risk for different reasons and after 23 hours of labor rushed to an emergency c-section. It was my absolute worst fear I was scared to death shaking they had to tie my arms down. Honestly I worked myself up so bad for nothing. It took an hour total, and was far less painful than the exhausting 23 hours oi just went through. The recovery wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be because my body was in full mommy mode. I haven’t gotten pregnant again so can’t really offer much advice to that but as far as if you get a c section in my opinion it sounds like it will be way less traumatic for you than when you delivered. Prayers for you

New Dr. For sure but why did you get pregnant again in the first place ? Also it sounds like you should have sued the Dr. And hospital for the way they treated you with your son. Neglect

I would suggest you get a different doctor this time and use a different hospital. Scheduling a c section would also be a better option they say second baby is usually bigger than the first.
I had a virginal birth but most people with c section seems like their recovery is not as bad compared to that of a virginal birth. Both cases there is always an extreme cases. Also just hope, believe and pray for a better experience with this baby.

I’ve just finished recovering from my 2nd C-section (both elective) after my first was born natural. I have to say that even though it sounds traumatic, a cesarean section is probably less stressful and a lot less recovery time compared to a natural. I had natural first time and it took me nearly 3 months to heal (had 3rd degree tear) then 4 years later had an elective cesarean and was up and about in 2 days, had no issues with my cut area and it healed really fast. My latest cesarean section was the same, they nicked my bladder but even then just had a catheter in for an extra day and was still up and about the same day. Discharged both times after 2 days and I have been doing everything I normally do plus more (3 kids takes work) ignore the stupid comments about ‘why would you get pregnant again’ because nobody knows your choices or has the right to judge but I would say just YouTube the actual procedure it looks worse than it is. The hardest part is not having the feeling in your legs for few hours because if like me I felt annoyed I had no control over how long the epidural would wear off and I felt useless as couldn’t move myself had to have people pass me things or baby and I wanted to do it myself. Good luck!! You will do fine!!

I didn’t have these issues, but as far as my labor and delivery goes it wasn’t the best. I made no progress to deliver, ended up induced, didn’t make any progress for 12 hours then labored HARD for 24 hours. My doctor told me a million times to have a c section, but I was determined to deliver naturally and ended up with a full episiotomy and tons of stitches after. It killed me to walk, sit, do anything really which then made me repressed. It was painful and uncomfortable. That being said, when I went to have my second baby I also was making no progress. At my due date I still wasn’t making progress to deliver and my doctor said labor and delivery would be similar to the first time and would probably end up in a c section anyway. I opted for the c section and scheduled it. BEST DECISION EVER. My girl was 40 weeks 4 days when we had the c section (still 0 progress). I was terrified and crying because I’d never had surgery or anything before. It was amazing. You get to hold your baby almost immediately just like a natural birth, and you don’t feel or see anything happening as far as the surgery goes. Don’t let the thought of a c section psych you out. I like to be a natural person as far as food and lifestyle. I’m all for breastfeeding and natural birth, but when you have complications the first time it makes the second time seem even scarier. I say find a new doctor and hospital to deliver at, and don’t be scared of a c section. Anything could go wrong in any situation, but it could also go perfectly. You want to love your birthing experience as much as you can, and a c section can give you a great experience! If that’s what’s healthier for you and baby, that’s what you should do. It’s a different experience, so you can get excited for it in your own way. This pregnancy and birth could be way different, so enjoy it and deal with things as they come your way :heart: congrats on your pregnancy!

I have to agree with some of these other ladies, find a new doctor and hospital!!!
If you do not feel comfortable with what your doctor is telling you don’t feel bad for seeking out a new doctor. Second opinions never hurt anyone, get a third if you still aren’t comfortable with their answers.
The eating disorder didn’t help some of problems you had in your first pregnancy, if you have that under control some of those problems may not occur. Also every pregnancy is different. I know someone that had problems and had a premie with an emergency csection to have her second 2 weeks late with no problems. Just take it day by day, and if you don’t feel comfortable find someone who will help you!

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C sections are not that bad u don’t feel anything if u can get past the mental part I’d take a c over vaginal birth anyday

I was in labor with my son for 12 hours, never went into labor, and after not moving from 3cms I decided that is was time to get him out, so I had a c section and it was a breeze for me. The only thing I felt was them pushing to get him out, pain wasn’t to bad for me… I was up and walking the next few days and was released…

Every pregnancy and delivery is different, it sounds super traumatic but don’t let it bring down your joy of being pregnant again. I would definitely try to see a different doctor and deliver at a different hospital if possible. So sorry you went through all that, your a tough mama

Find a new doctor and make sure you tell them all the trauma you went through. And avoid that hospital as much as you can. I wish you a safe and happy pregnancy and birth.

Im sorry u went through that. Do not go back to that hospital at all. Lol. My goodness. C-sections are not so bad. If its safer for u and the baby then it is what needs to happen. Have u neen ok since? Has some of the issues been taken care of? Are u healthy? Did u take any measures to NOT get pregnany since u didnt want to? Everything will be fine. Get a midwife or a new doctor and tell them the medical issues that happened last time so they are aware of the last situation (the hip…the abdominal…the hernia…the cord around his neck at birth) that way they have an idea of the best help for u during this pregnancy.

Oh wow I would say different ob doctor and different hospital and sue them that’s wrong

If you are ever feeling ignored for even a second, you should be finding a new doctor immediately.

I’d be finding another hospital to go to when it’s time for baby and a new dr for sure! Holy smokes I’m so sorry you had to endure all that!

You should as other posters have said find another Hospital/doctor and find a lawyer to help with that case because that should be taken to court with how much they mistreated you and put your life and your suns life in danger. Because nothing they did was normal.

Having a c section was one of my worst fears. After being in labor for 40 hrs the Dr suggested it be done…I cried, I shook…I was scared. But in the end the pain was far less than I experienced when I surgically had an ovarian cyst removed. Although I do still have problems with feeling my toes…I did what I had to do for my daughter and I wouldn’t change it at all. I would rather never feel my feet again as long as she was safe…it’s scary but people have it done every day…you got this Mama!!

Find a new doctor and different hospital. Any doctor or nurse that doesn’t listen to your concerns isn’t one you want delivering your baby. Make sure you speak to the new doctor about how many health issues you struggled with including the hip issues and the large baby. Always seek medical advice and attention from someone who actually has license and can prove that to you (this includes midwives and doulas, and yes there are some out there who think because they’ve given birth before that they’ve got a Ph.D.)

I had a horrendous first birth 39hrs labour only dilated 1cm nurse slipped her elbow hit me in the eye it swelled n blackened i had IV induction i was 3wks over they put it in both arms wrong they bruised n swelled then they tried my ankles same it ended up going into back of my knee they dropped me after i was anesthetized i was bruised down my left side i looked like i had done a few rounds with Mike Tyson i ended up with 122 staples externally which they put 68 in crooked so had to be cut out n re stiched my scar went from hip to hip n weeped for 2yrs it didnt get fixed til my next birth, which was a planned c-section n it was great no truama recovery was a bit painful but didnt last long other than that it was good. Birth is different each time the first is scary enough without issues. I ve had 5 c-sections my body just doesnt dilate i was disappointed but ultimately you want a healthy mother n n baby talk to your dr or midwife n shop around for proffessionals ur comfortable with. Good luck

Get a different doctor and go to a different hospital

Find a new doctor and a different hospital. I had an emergency C-section 9 months ago it wasn’t all that bad. First few days hurt getting up and down, after that within 2 weeks I felt good. You got this!!