I’m currently 36 weeks pregnant with my second baby. My son is 11 months, and we have never had a night apart. I am scheduled for a c section and know I must stay a minimum of 3 days in the hospital, and I’m aware he cannot visit due to covid. It will be my first few nights without seeing my son, and honestly, I feel a strong sense of anxiety and helplessness, knowing this is coming up in three short weeks. My question is, how did everyone else feel? How did you get over that anxiety? It’s my biggest worry, ATM. I don’t want to feel this anxiety over my son I know he is in good hands, I just can’t get over this overwhelming feeling of not being ready to let him go a few nights.
When new baby is here thoughts will fade. But truly never go away.
We facetimed our 3 year old as we were in the hospital a week after my c section at 36 weeks. It was the longest we had been away from him. Now our twins are still in the nicu at 10 days old gaining the energy they need to eat on their own so they can come home. Splitting time between going to spend time with them everyday and our 3 year old is rough because our oldest does not fully understand that his brothers cannot come home yet. Calling and facetiming every day will help you and your little will be able to hear your voice or see you.
It’s okay to worry. It will be okay. I didn’t spend 3 days in the hospital with my c section. Only 1!!! I left at 10am the next morning!
I would say you will be able to use your phone and video chat with your child so he is able to see your face and everything will be ok.
Use your phone and FaceTime your son. Bring a small 4x6 or 5x7 picture in a cheapish frame to keep at your bedside for your stay so you can hold it and think of him. Let him pick a stuffed animal for you to take with you
Work up to it. Try him for a night with grandma and grandpa. Here and there so both of you aren’t so stressed when the time comes
It’s def hard, it was the first time leaving mine also…I peaced out of the hospital ASAP tho. I did not stay 3 nights. No way
When I delivered my second I was also very anxious and nervous to leave my first born, even knowing she was in good hands and I knew she would have fun!
It was extremely hard not getting that experience to have my first born come to the hospital to see her brother but she was still one of the firsts to see him. Covid definitely made things hard for mothers unfortunately
But calling and checking in will help a ton, even FaceTime. Ask the ppl that your LO is staying with to update you often and maybe even send pictures! Thats what helped me. My daughters grandparents are amazing at keeping me updated and making sure I know everything that is going on with her!
I pray you have a safe, easy delivery. I know it’s hard leaving your oldest especially when you so badly want them involved
You don’t have to with it being your second kid
It’s a legit fear, but once you let it go it’s a life changer. If it is truly someone you trust then you have gained a future break, and your child had gained an important bond with another person.
Do a test run right now. Let him go for a night and once you get over that hump you will feel much better.
Allows your android to facetime.
Practice using with whomever will be with your boy during your hospital stay.
He’ll be fine!
I’ve never felt nervous about that. It was actually nice to have a little break and enjoy my newborns before I went home and missed a lot of sleep. They stayed with their father and my parents so I wasn’t worried at all.
I get it, and sadly I have no good advice. My daughter is 14 months and I won’t even let her have a sleepover at my parents house because I want her here
Leaving a child for the first time is never easy. Ever. You constantly worry if they’re okay, how they’re handling it, you feel guilt, e.t.c.
Just focus on your new baby! Once you finally are apart the separation anxiety will calm down. Then you can focus on meeting the new one, and once baby is placed in your arms all fears will disappear. It goes fast, trust me
My kids where months apart too and my biggest regret was I never allowed my older son to be a baby, he had to be the big brother so quick
I felt the EXACT same way when I had my daughter and my son was 18 months. It was our first time apart and overnight at that. I even delayed going to the hospital while in labor just so I didn’t have to leave him and was 6cm dilated when I arrived. With COVID it made it especially hard because he could not visit. But thankfully the drs let me come home the next evening. Through all the worrying, he was just fine. I was more a wreck than he was. And he was SO excited when we got back home. The time to focus on her was much needed for me and her. You got this mama. I’m sure everything will be just fine Sending blessings your way.
Its HARD. My daughter is 2, I had my son in april and leaving her for those 36 hours were dreadful since we never really spent time apart with me being a stay at home mom. I was thankful to go home so quick but it was upsetting being away from her. Just make sure to leave her in the most trusted hands and video call as much as possible! that is what got me through those long hours away
It’s the hardest part! I was a mess when I had baby number 2 and even more of a mess in august when I had baby number 3 because I had to leave my 3 to and 16 month old for 5 days because I had to be induced and that turned in to an emergency csection
Ive left my 2yr old twice over night. Once not by choice as it was after midnight and he was already asleep after a rough day so i left him with my MIL. The other time was with my SIL as we had my partners work xmas party 2hrs away. I didnt trust a babysitter in a city i don’t know and she loves an hout from there so was close as i could get him. I hated it and didnt sleep either time.
I’m due with our second in March and am already stressing about leaving him. With the current restrictions he can’t come and see me in hospital and i was stuck there 5days last time aftet my c-section (blood pressure wouldn’t go down). I could probably handle 1 night because I’d be too exhausted otherwise but anymore than that and I’ll probably end up signing myself and bub out early providing are are both doing well.
I know he will be in good hands with my mum and fiance and he will still be at home. Doesnt change that i don’t want to leave him.
I cant offer much advice but will send you a hug and say you’re not alone feeling like this:heart:
I’m on the same boat My c section is scheduled in a week and I have a 1 year old I’m so sad to leave home for the first time and with this whole covid it just makes it tough to know that they aren’t able to visit
I had a c section in April during Covid, They only had me stay at the hospital 32 hours. Praying for a speedy recovery for you.
I was away from my 2 year old for the first time when i have birth to my second. I was gone 6 days. It was very hard for me, and for her as well. I cried and wanted to go home cuz i missed her so much! But it passes, she is fine and so am I! You will be ok snd ur baby as well. Not much to do to help ur feelings!!
I am sorry for your anxiety my son was with his dad and my mom with my c- section I stayed 2days and left. My son was in good hands I called my mom talked to him as many times I needed and then I was ok
I’m in a similar situation. I’m 38 weeks and have a 10 month old who I’ve never been away from. I’m in early labor rn, but not progressing. I’m scheduled for induction next week. I have so much anxiety about being away from him. I wish he could just come with us
With covid I was going to be allowed to be discharged the next day. But I had clots and they needed to keep me an extra day to monitor me. I had my second boy 8/18/20 and funny enough I left on my due date 8/20/20. They try to get you in and out a quick as possible. Seeing how your having a c section they obviously will keep you at least 2 days. My oldest is 2 and he stayed with my mom while I was in the hospital, he went with his dad when my boyfriend and i came home with his brother. So i had a few days to get sleep and such in order.
I had my surprise baby in December emergency c section and got home following day
Yes that is terrible but it’s better to think about his safety
I get it my son eas 3 when I had my second son… i just called often to let him know I loved him and missed him… also try FaceTime or something that may ease your worry being able to physically see that he is ok… good luck momma. And congrats.
Depending on who your son is staying with yous could always FaceTime a bunch, its definitely not the same but you make it work… my hubby is away with work more then he’s home and thats our compromise, we FaceTime as much as possible that way our little guy can still see his dad and is able to babble away at him
If you leave him with dad and grandma he will be fine. FaceTime him every day so he can see your face. You will have the new baby and healing to occupy your time and you’ll be back home in no time.
My son was 7 when I had my baby last spring, we were gone for 5 days total because of the csection and jaundice… I FaceTimed my oldest and he tried to be strong and not cry but I cried almost the whole time I was gone because I missed him so much it was awful. 6 months later and he’s finally starting to want to go visit people and spend the night with family, he wouldn’t leave my side after being away for 5 days like I was.
Use the phone to stay in touch. Setup a camera with voice in his room so you can see him and even talk to him. I know in the hospital I could never sleep at night so being able to see him at night might be comforting.
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