I do not trust my aunts boyfriend: Advice?

Hi, I need advice. So my two year old is very close with my aunt. They have a great relationship; I and her have had our ups and downs in the past but get along for the kid’s sake. She has a partner who I find to be toxic, acts nice to my face yes, and has good points but has said mean, sarcastic things about me and members of my family behind my back, makes comments on things that aren’t their place at times and in general has said things I find to be overstepping the mark. She says her partner doesn’t mean it and is only joking, but iv felt hurt by this and feel more and more fed up with things that are said every so often. I do not understand why ppl are mean or judgemental. I worry about this person in my or my child’s life because I feel like they aren’t trustworthy in general. Am I over-sensitive?


Whether you are being over sensitive or not, you are entitled to have those feelings. If you genuinely feel like this person is toxic, then you need to do what’s best for you and your child. As a mother (& father), it is our job to protect our children.


Nope. You chose who you allow to be around your child. If you have a bad feeling stick with that, it’s for a reason. If it causes problems in your relationship with your Aunt , so be it.

You are not oversentsitive. The bf seems toxic and probably does all those things in order to create drama and distance your aunt from her family. Please do not let her know you don’t like him. I think if you say anything against him she will hold on to him harder. Focus on her and your boundaries and what is healthy and respectful and what is toxic and disrespectful. Some people are just really good con artist and are pathologically toxic.

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Trust your gut instincts.


Your aunt needs to tell him to be quiet in your childs presence

If you think theres more than just insulting you happening then by all means remove your child from the situation completely

What he says only matters if you allow it to matter to you. So who cares what he says! It is his opinion and you don’t have to own it too.

No. You are not wrong for keeping your kid at a distance
Your child will hear what’s being said and whether joking or not your kid doesn’t understand that. Your kid will eventually loose respect for you.

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Nobody “jokes” when they say hateful things. I wouldn’t let my kids around him.


To be fair, almost everyone in your life has more than likely talked about you behind your back, more than once.

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Toxic is toxic no matter what way a person swings it. My ex brother-in-law was the same way. Ended up in our family for almost thirty years. After my sister passed away in 2020 I no longer allow him around myself, or my kid’s. I feel bad for my Nieces, but not much I can do. He has them brain washed into thinking we are all bad, even though it’s him.

For your mental health, and to protect your kid’s I would just stay away.

No I do not allow my child around people who disrespect, especially in front of them! Especially just an aunts boyfriend. He doesn’t need a place in your child’s life.

My kid would not go over there anymore

Always trust your gut instinct

Trust ur gut instinct!