I don’t know who to go to, but the last few days since I started back at work, I’ve been feeling angry, and I feel like my one year old prefers my fiancé over me. I can’t get him to calm down at night, or when he’s upset, he doesn’t want his mommy he wants his dad. It makes me feel like I’m not a good mom. And it makes me angry and upset. I love my little boy and my fiancé more than anything. I just wonder this a normal feeling or is this something I should talk to a doctor about.
Hate to tell you this. But im a stay at home mom. I do it all. My kid still favors her dad more.
Kids go through phases like this. My kid is a momma’s boy to the extreme, but some days he just wants his papa and I’m old news.
I’m a SAHM and my 1 yr old lil guy prefers his dad more than me.
Kids go back and forth all the time. My daughter won’t let anyone even look at her if she’s all about me. And same goes when she’s all about her daddy. I can’t even look at her lol. Idk why you’d take him to the Dr because he prefers his dad right now lol
My kids prefer their dad, I just get the shit jobs and sometimes it makes me feel awful, other times it makes me think brilliant not my problem to deal with
I was a working home for 3 months. Awful time with returning endometrosis symptoms, fortnightly periods and drops in feeds. My little one was 9 months when started nursery (ex 33 weeker born on my birthday). In the end I quit after trying to work in pain for nearly 5 years. My little one prefers dad to me but is also the fully able parent. No one prepared me for the difficulties returning to work and know it’s common. In addition to pain and child illness as well. Now 3.5 I have started being my own boss again but this time applying more hours to it.
My son has always been a daddy’s boy it’s weird but I couldn’t go to sleep because my son wouldn’t stop moving unti my husband came from work and sang to my belly his 2 now and still prefer his daddy over me it’s funny because once he was born he would wake up about a hour before dad came home from work my husband would give him a bottle sing and he would fall back to sleep every time
Also my husband does and always has done bedtime due to my fatigue and recharging.
Give him some time. Give yourself some time you are all going through an adjustment period. If after a couple weeks you are still feeling this way it might not be a bad idea to talk to your doc about it. Kids go though different phases also my kids are 18, 14, 12 and 8 and they all still go through it one minute they want their mama and the next they don’t. Don’t take it personal.
Some kids prefer dad…and some prefer mom. He still loves you and I promise there will be a day where he reaches for you instead of him…for now it is what it is and it is normal.
All of emotions come to play when you have a little one and start back at work…if it’s the job that is making you feel “angry” your child can sense it. And another direction your child may feel some sorta way with you gone. If they are use to you being home. When you get home from work…leave it at the door and when you step in your home, spend a little one on one playing with them, giving them your attention for just 30 min and letting you know you miss them. They have feeling too and at a younger age can’t tell you how they really feel. I had the same issue when mine was younger and we got closer…and then again might just be like my other child and just favor him more…just cause. Patience mama your not alone
We do have wonderful moments together before bed and in the mornings which I cherish.
Don’t let your kids emotions dictate yours
Your child is likely to seek comfort with the person who spends the most time with him. If your husband is home, that will be him. My girls do the same thing to my husband now that I don’t work, and he works long hours. They still love him, but as far as consoling and bedtime and all that, the little one especially, wants me.
It’s just a phase. Don’t let it ruin you.
I’m a sahm of 3yr old twins. They ask for daddy all damn day. It’s not you dear. It’s just a kid thing. Dont be so hard on yourself
My youngest is like this and I’m not working atm lol don’t worry lol xx
You’re jealous. Kids go through phases like this often. No need to bother Dr with this. It will change soon
Next week he will want you instead!
It’s a phase! My daughter only wanted me until she turned 2… then would melt down in parking lots because she wouldn’t hold my hand, only her father’s. But now, she’s back to me lol. (Try not to take it personal, it should pass)
Its normal up to a point but i would talk to your doctor to be sure.
Maybe your child can sense that you’re feeling angry. Maybe you need to go release some tension and he wont feel your vibes anymore. My son feels my vibes.
I’m a stay at home mom and while my son loves me and I’m the only one that can usually get him to drink a bottle, he still gets the most excited when his daddy comes home from work.
If you can’t cope with the “anger” and it’s causing a rift in your relationship, and makes you feel as if you want to push your son away (or out the window… well, maybe once in a while, because we’ve all had those moments, but I mean regularly), then it might be PPD. If it’s just exhaustion and frustration…like perhaps you had this picture in your mind of how things would go and you’re just having trouble adjusting to reality, then give it time. This whole process is an adjustment for all of you. And life in general will be a constant surprise as your child grows and changes. If it’s the latter, just breathe, remind yourself of what you love and what makes you happy, and know this isn’t permanent.
What your baby is doing is totally normal. Now you getting angry and upset is a bit much so maybe you should see a mental health professional.
They have preference phases. Won’t always be like this
They go in phases. Your fiancée is the favorite now…you will be soon.
I am a SAHM and my son prefers my husband more than me. It makes me feel like a bad mom to but i know that he knows im mama and he needs me but he also needs my husband. Its okay to have emotions about it but you also have to know he needs you to and his favorite person will always change over time.
I think you are lucky that he loves his daddy. That shows you he is a really good guy Be grateful & think of it that way
This normal set up time with just you and your son to do fun things together it will help
It’s normal…
Don’t panic or stress too much over it. The baby will pick up on your stress and won’t be comforted very well.
Kids go through a preference phases all the time. For the first year or so my LO was all about mom, then it was all about Dad unless he wanted to feed. A couple months before his 2nd birthday it was all about me again. He will be 3 in a couple weeks and it is ALL about dad unless he has a bad ouch. it’s pretty normal.
The same thing happened with us except I went back at 15 Months. My son started favouring his Dad over me and I was really upset as well. it took some time to adjust and a lot of tears but now I love the relationship they have. My son has also adjusted and will want me for certain things and his dad for other things. it will all balance out… Hugs!
Your child is adjusting to you going back to work just like you are. Its normal. If your feelings get worse then talk to your doctor
It could also just be his age. I’m a stay at home mom and my first born was a mama’s boy until about 1 1/2. He’s almost 2 1/2. He woke up one day and hated mom and dad is now his everything. He doesn’t listen to me and wants daddy for everything. My hubby is the only one who can get him to lay down and can put him to bed. It ripped my heart out, but now I’ve gotten use to it.
Your both adjusting to change. It wouldn’t hurt to talk to a counselor once a week. You will both get used to it and don’t worry he will be a total mommas boy again soon
My 1.5 year old too has started favoring dad I must admit I was extremely jealous and felt like I wasnt home enough - I’m working and my last semester of nursing school is about to start - I havent been very present the last 2 years bc of how demanding nursing school is. And baby spends a significant more time with dad than I because of it (10 hour clinical days, long lectures, studying time and then also work)… but I really thought about it, they are building their relationship and bonding. And i get to shower in pease. But when baby is sick, he still wants me. It was a tough couple weeks of feeling sad, not worthy, lonely, unloved and useless. But I came around
PPD is a very real thing that a lot of us go through, if you’re feeling anger towards your child, it may be a sign that it is time to speak to your doctor. (Not saying you are or you have PPD.) It is normal for baby to want the present parent more. Dont be so hard on yourself, mama. You’re doing great. If you have to work, you have to work. I hated going back after my kids were born, but they needed me to work. You’re doing everything you’re supposed too! But please dont be afraid to reach out if you’re having a hard time with your mental health. Your family needs you.
Im a stay at home mom and my 7 month old prefers his dad over me. He screams in the morning when my husband leaves.
My 1 year old prefers his dad. Even though I’m a stay at home mom and I see him more. Dont sweat it. I just look at it as they’re bonding ur his mommy you’ll always be special to him. Give it some time momma
Completely normal my kids have gone back and forth over the years. But mostly favor dad except my oldest he’s evened out with stuff over the years and he’s 9. Some things it’s my help with and other things it’s his step dad. Middle child mostly dad except when he’s sick he’s 6. Youngest is 3 goes back and forth… first time with each kid that they wanted dad over me it broke my heart till this day when they want dad over me it hurts. In think it’s a mom thing.
Its hard but try not to take it personally. My daughter is all about mama right now. Doesn’t want daddy for anything. Its exhausting. But, there was a time when she wanted Daddy. It goes in waves. Just give him smooches and read to him. Does he have a favorite toy or activity you can get involved with?
That’s how my first born was right after birth. She only wanted daddy. I was just the milk maid
Maybe something worth talking to your doctor about. My baby is 6 months. The first 3 he wanted nothing to do with Dad cuz I was on maternity leave and he spent all day and night with me. Now he’s all about Dad since I’ve gone back to work. Frankly it turns me on seeing my hubby parent lol(it’s his first). But I was sad at first too. I think it’s kinda normal.
It is normal completely. I was a stay at home mom for a year and a half with my kids and I went to work after my husband got laid off. I felt that way for so long. Sometimes I still do. But it’s really not the case at all when it comes to kids loving one parent any better than the other. Both parents are all your babies know at that point. Word of advice, spend all the time in the world with them when you are home. It’s a adjustment for everyone, but you’ll get through it
It’s normal hun. I’ve been on mat leave and parental leave and am now going back to work in a month. For the firdt 8 months my bf (sons dad) did nothing with him. So when he’d try to watch him or touch him while I shower he’d freak out. He’s gotten a bit better now but I’m still his preference and safe spot. Now that my free time with him is WI ding down and I see my bf take on more of a role I sometimes get jealous cuz I’m no longer getting those cuddles at that moment and I’m used to doing it all. I just remind my self that it’s his turn to experience that amount of love and joy from our son and it’ll make things easier for him when I’m back at work. It’s a transition for everyone and Ur hormones are still funky. Remember your baby loves you and it’s a transition for everyone.
Went through this same thing! It’s normal, don’t over think it. Everything will be ok. It will pass I promise! Your baby still loves you
I feel like it’s a dad thing. Ik it sucks. Our kids tend to test the waters to see which of us they can get by with whatever lol. There are times they are about mom and there’s times their about dad. It comes in waves.
Especially when they get older it seems like. My son used to be all about mama. Now that he’s a toddler he likes to aggrevate and occupy dad. But again it comes in waves.
Totally normal. Def still worth a mention to dr
Where is he while you are at work?
It’s guilt that you are feeling, masked as anger. Speak to your fiance about how you are feeling and ask for his support to create a bedtime routine that includes you. Make it a special time for you and your little one to bond if dad is getting more time throughout the day. Come up with your own morning waking song. Just integrate little ways for you guys to bond.
It is normal. At 20 months he does the same thing and we are still breastfeeding. It is Daddy, Daddy, Daddy. He even started calling me Daddy recently, I truly think he does it to mess with me because he speaks full sentences already.