Honestly you should run and not look back
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Wow you approve of touch freely your sick as he is
he needs to put his foot down with these girls because all they are doing is getting under your skin on purpose, The more they know they upset you the more it will go on. They aren’t his kids so he needs to draw a line in the sand, and any EX who uses their kids to get at their partner is a piece of shit. If he can’t make you a priority right now then you are in for a rough road. They are his past, you are his future, they are going to do this with every woman in his life if he allows it to go on, I speak from experience.
Boy this is a tough situation
See a marriage counselor- the 2 of you. Immediately.
Couples counseling before marriage
Ur weird if u feel sexually threatened by a child.
Dump her and move on …100% sure on this…
Ignore them. They are children who will eventually grow up.
Your man should be the one who should be telling his kids About their behavior… He can’t just overlook. If he dsnt see she anything wrng with his kids behavior than to be honest in future it will never be their fault in anything… It will be yours,u will be blame. It’s better to talk things out. If he still dsnt say anything than I advice you to live him. If he cares about you than I am sure he will make sure his kids knows your place in his life and he will stand for you😊 good luck
If he doesn’t have your back on this matter, he’s diminishing your feelings and that’s not cool. Trust your gut and know that your emotions are valid. You have to ask yourself if you want a future full of being minimized. I’ve been there and I don’t recommend it.
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Move on. Your not desired here.
those girls are inappropriate and out of line … unless he adopted them he is not their father and the touchy feely stuff must stop immediately and he is the one who must stop it… and the ex needs to tell those girls that their actions are not appropriate and enforce it…
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I’m in the same boat as you except I’m married to him. My step daughters never liked me and . I gave up yeeeears ago.
I don’t try. When they were younger I tried. One is 21 and the other is 15. At their age they know what they are doing. I don’t waste my breath. I love their dad and if they still can’t accept it. Tough. It’s me and mine.
We are happy and will continue to live our lives regardless. Much luck to you!
Listen you will never take his step daughters place. And if you feel like that you are the problem and you should leave and find a man who you are free to create another family with without feeling like there are some imaginary conflict made up with kids 
those are his daughter’s you are the other woman so whatever they have to say about their father running out on their mom or vice versa you have no say in anything and if they say something to you that you don’t like leave you have no obligation to be there in the middle of family drama you’re the girlfriend nothing more. I am being honest with you. And you can’t force your boyfriend to make his daughters like you talk to him and and ask if you guys could all sit down a talk let the girls tell you how they feel without you interrupting them because this is a intervention to hopefully in the future make things a bit more civil for you and your bf. And I wanna touch up on something… if you are at all jealous of this mama daughters and if you ever feel like you’d hurt them over your Feelings leave and leave fast I am a victim of my step mother trying to throw me out of a moving car, trying to lie on me to my father about things I never did, I was around 14 I felt so alone because everyone made it seem like I was being a bratty teenager that can’t get over her parents divorce… those are his children you deal with it or leave
Had this same problem. My old high school sweetheart and I got back together after many years. His daughter was in her late 20’ s and was a only child. I asked him before we ever started dating if she would have a problem with us. He said oh no . But as time went on she belittled and was disrespectful, rude, and openly hostile. She was married and has always been a spoiled brat. Both by dad and husband. So after giving him 8 years, I left. It was the hardest thing I ever done. But I was not put first and no commitment. I asked him after a few years if he had promised the daughter he would not remarry. Never got a straight Answer, but he did propose when we first got together, so I thought he was serious. The daughter made a remark to someone once , that she would come between us. Had her dad by the crook of her finger. I could see no point of being hurt anymore.
I don’t care about the BIOLOGY if he took care of them and they love each other they are his kids. Kids come first. If you are worried they are trying to steal your man you are really messed up in the head.
Just do good your relationship with your husband to be. And set boundaries when you are in one house. And the father must talk to them that they should respect and honor the woman he choose because he loves her. Just time will tell and show if they accept you. Do your role as a mom and a wife thats all and if you have issues talk to your husband
When kids will see it sooner or later maybe things will change.
take a break - from both his daughters- let them wind down AND from him, for allowing their behavior to seep into your relationship. In a couple years, they’ll both be off living their own lives- you can revisit then ~
His kids are probably just being territorial in front of you. I wouldn’t be discussing his relationship with anyone else and wanting to see ‘touchy feely’ to blacken them and try to get them out of his life is pretty shit, anyone can see what you are up to and it’s nasty. Move on if this is your strategy and find some other soft egit with no kids who can stroke your ego 24 hours a day
Don’t let them. You guys have to be on the same page…if he isn’t fuckin run girl.
Don’t try anymore. Just co exist and be respectful. They’ll move on any way. They’re about that age they won’t even be around anymore.
First off you dint deserve to be treated badly by the girls and your husband should stand next to you and not allow it . Children oh their just kids At 16&18 not kids anymnthe adult and you need to remember until you put a stop to them treating you bad you will soon begin to identify as less than you are its a fucked way of emotional abuse perhaps explaining it to your soon to be husband that way he might begin to understand that their treatment of you can be very critical and the happiness that you would bring into his life. The girls will never respect you or treat you right unless you create boundaries boundaries that will let them know what you tolerate and how you expect to be treated after all you are going to be his wife . And setting your boundaries for your tolerances you have to stand by them the girls do not get a pass because every passing of them just shows that you’re not going to stand behind what you say all the time if your husband cannot see this and see how critical it is as to how these girls treat you he is only going to be raising two girls that will wreck the happiness and the love that you are willing to bring into his life 16 and 18 they’re not children I know exactly what they’re doing perhaps it’s repetitive behavior that they learn from their mother hence forth divorce that was the result of that one you don’t have to be their friend although you might want to first off they will always hold you second to their mother and your mother will always have something to say about it in time perhaps they will come up come along and understand that you are a good person and you only mean well to be with us man as well as including his two daughters and your new life but still they are of the age that say nobody how long their own or you could only hope they will have many lessons to learn many broken hearts to endure and as they learn his things and they mature in their life then possibly there will be a friendship cultivated between you and them you’re the woman that you are and treat them with respect and stand your ground with your boundaries and what you will tolerate kids do not deserve to have to deal with their parents bad choices within their lives nor the decisions thatAs parents we make but theyare and will be a part of it all so in educating them and being ipen to discussions and the reality of the situation that they’re having to observe and deal with it can be very hard and they can be very alone but as parents and stepparents it is up to us to be open to their questions and the truth about the situation do not lie to them and use your best judgment depending on the age as to the reality of the discussion kids are sponges they listen to adult conversations whether they understand them or not but needless to say in the long run they are a part of the discussions and they too need to be taught what boundaries are and treatment of othersEspecially new people will become involved with their parents
Yeah my experience with my step sisters and brother was pretty awful good luck with that.
I fee like 99% of your fans are idiots who would rather consult a bunch of random strangers who don’t know the whole story, than do the right thing and have a serious conversation with the person/s they are asking advice about 
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum! I feel like my soon to be husbands step kids are trying to tear us apart: Advice? - Mamas Uncut
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Unless that relationship with his children changes before you marry him, you shouldn’t marry him. You should not be in a close relationship with any man who allows you to feel intimidated, inferior, or insecure and threatened about your relationship, no matter who or what is causing it. That will affect your mental and emotional health and start wearing on your physical health as a result.
You may see his children as his step children but he calls them his children so don’t try to reduce the nature of their relationship in your mind by calling them his step-children. That will only confuse you because it sounds like they are confident in the nature of their relationship.
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I went through it too. Marry him. If you love each other marry him. They will have to get over it like every other kid that has to deal with stepparents. And no they aren’t his kids. They are too old to be acting so childish and he needs to tell them that.
Sometimes walking away is the hardest yet best thing to do. It won’t get better. They will get worse. Who needs that
There’s a lot we don’t know here. How long has he been their stepdad?
What is the inappropriate behaviour?
Would you find it in appropriate if it was his biological children.
If you had a bond with them would it be such an issue.
There are too issues here for me. Your relationship with them and your relationship with him.
Like how does he respond when they belittle you? Are you set as a united front in front of them. How long have you and her been together.
Bonds with stepkids takes longer the older they are. And if they have clearly been through a lot and are upset that their stepfather has moved on that could be harming their inner peace too which may explain the behaviour.
First thing you need to sort is your partner and you being a team. Sorting boundaries and behaviour expectations and consequences to bad behaviour reactions.
The two of you need to make compromises and it will involve a lot of communication and give and take.
Xx
You divorce spouses, not children. And you have not described what you feel is “touchy feely”. And since you were not involved with him during his marriage, then you don’t know how “touchy-feely” they were before the divorce. (If you were with him while he was married - then you deserve the consequences).
If you make him chose, will he really chose you? And if he does, don’t think the girls will disappear without animosity on his part. Like it or not, you are on the losing side……
Step kids don’t mean anything. If they get in the way get rid of them you can always get more.
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Just ignore the kids. Unless they live with him full time. Aside from that, they will be gone soon wether it be to a university or out in the real world. They don’t have to like you, you aren’t their mom. However HE needs a talking to about letting them be disrespectful towards you and their “touchy-feely “ behavior. Don’t let them get in the way of your relationship. Kids don’t run the parents. That’s not how it works.
Your soon to be husband must be the one to set the rules and parameters of the family relationship since they are technically his children. You should continue to be nice and available to his girls but its not your job to be their friend or mother figure. They are old enough to have boyfriends of their own and saving daddy from his future wife is just kids doing what they think their mother wants. The kids aren’t the problem, his ex wife is. You need to have a long conversation about your feelings and concerns. Make the conversation more about your concerns for him and his relationship with his kids than your hurt feelings. If the girls are making it difficult for you to have a relationship with their dad, tell him. If he blows your concerns off you need to rethink what you are doing. Many times men need to wake up and see what they might lose if they continue to ignore the situation. So be prepared to not accept dates or time with his girls to wake him up. Put your feelings and wants first in your life or you will end up in a marriage that is nothing but negative for you. Men will always lean towards what they know and are comfortable with. No woman will stand for kids coming between them and their husband so don’t think its all you. And above all DO NOT wait until after the wedding to deal with this issue or you will be terribly disappointed.
It’s up to him to set the rules and boundaries. If he’s not doing that then he is not the one for you. He should set them down and let them know that disrespecting you is not allowed. He has failed to do that. How long are you going to allow this? Up to you. Have one last conversation and then be done if it doesn’t change.
Sooo can I just point out that those are NOT his kids???
He can cut ties with all of them if he truly wanted to. But it seems like he is choosing them over you anyhow…
Until the dad puts his foot down and let’s them know how it is ,it won’t change. By him not saying anything he’s letting the girls think it’s ok and they will continue with it. Plus these girls are grown, I get they’re always gonna be on their mamas side,but act like you’re some what grown.
You need to be honest with him and if he doesnt understand, love isnt always enough you need to move on. It wont last if youre already doubting your marriage.
You can’t make them love you and the more you try the more they will hate it. Weigh the relationship of you and them vs. you and your boyfriend. If it bothers you this much then maybe it isn’t worth it as it kinda seems that he is okay with their treatment of you!!
They probably are … He needs to step and let them know … If not leave
You love a sick man who is touchy feely with kids. What’s there to fight over? Sounds to me your the one who needs to leave and get your head out the clouds.
If he is divorced,who cares what his ex approves of?
Men wont ever confrontate (yes invented word!) when it’s over their kids. So you will NEVER change this dynamic. You can only change how YOU handle it.
You said their touching is ‘inappropriate’, but isnt it just normal boisterous family stuff?
It maybe making you feel jealous, but that’s your problem.
They probably will mature in time, when they get older, and wiser, but the question is, for now, can you accept that this is his life? …I couldn’t and didnt.
X doesn’t approve why ?
Were you with him
While he was still married?
My pussy is so fucking itchy I think my ghetto ass man gave me crabs wtf 
ugh I’m going insane and I smell really 
FISHY!!! Someone HELP!!! 911 & I’m a stepmom to his looser kids 
They are a package deal. Run for your life. It doesn’t get any better.
Run. Hes a pedophile
Go find another man.
Whoop thier ass with a switch they can choose off the tree. Respect. 
Just keep them in your prayers daily.
God knows the hearts of us all.
I too have struggled with same and more.
I pray for the ex…
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Tell those too brats in no uncertain terms that you are not going anywhere… Unfortunately when you are dealing with females like this (and no they are just kids anymore, I’ve seen younger children kill) you sometimes need to play their game cause that’s all females like this know… You need to amp up your time with him, be extra touchy feely and extra sweet to him when they are around I mean oozingly sweet!!! Make more plans for just you and him. You seriously need to claim your dominance or those girls will for sure destroy what you have… Don’t let them!!
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Slide off, this is only gonna get worse, for you.
Move to a tropical island away from them all.
Sounds annoying thanks no goodbye
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Red flag already or else you’re in for a misery.
Being a step kid is really hard, and being a step parent is also really hard.
I didn’t always get along with my step mom, but she and my father modeled marriage the way it should be. Marriage is between a man and a woman, and no person, not even blood should tear it apart. You both need to be on the same page. But have grace for the girls, and love them like Jesus.
If they’re touchy feely with him, I’m sorry to be the one to tell you this, but there’s a chance there has been sexual abuse in the past. If they saw him as strictly a father, that wouldn’t be happening. That is a huge red flag for me. Use caution.
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I don’t understand why he is still involved if his not there father ?
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Don’t feel bad it’s not the girls fault alot of it is to do with their mom she probably feeds alot of ideas into their heads to cause them to act that way because if other moms see their ex husbands happier with the new person then with them they tend to get jealous but I promise you one thing if you not let it bother you think of you and your family this is your family even with his girls i promise the jealous mom will get over it and you’ll see in time the girls will start to like you better and act different but in a good way because you show them that what their mother thinks of your family doesn’t matter i hope this helps good luck have faith and don’t stress and just know its not the children’s fault sometimes adults act out more than the children so just tell yourself im a good mom and this is my family because you are the woman of the house and that is say to yourself this is my home not the other moms home and her opinion of me doesn’t affect and will not affect my family or happyness.
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The fact that they are touchy feely with him, should be a red flag,
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I can see the 18 year old doin some sh*t like that. If she’s not biologically his, then she may have a crush on her step dad? Idk. That’s a weird situation.
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Wow sounds like they are trying to push your buttons. Talk to your husband boundaries need to be made and he need to respect your feelings
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You both need to have a serious conversation about what you feel and what he feels before you get to deep in, because if he doesn’t feel the same your both wasting time.
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Might sound like a dumb question.
But have you tried to talk to them one on one? Without him around?
Communication can go a long way.
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Yeah the touchy feely accusations. Better get a lid on your jealous behavior.
Kick them out of your house. They can live with their mother and he can see them in public places. You’re going to be his wife. He needs to be more considerate of you.
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Better get things settled and worked out before the wedding, or it will never work and you will be headed for divorce court. If he won’t see your side he isn’t giving you the respect you deserve. Sounds like he gives his ex more respect than you. Won’t work that way for long.
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Nothing will change. She manipulates them and of course they will side with her. They aren’t biologically his? It’s not your fault their relationship failed but they’re making it seem like it is. Either they respect you or it will destroy your relationship with him
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Say that shit needs to change and leave if it doesn’t. If nothing changes and you stay with him, you’re going to be nothing but miserable. Just remember the ones who are trying to make you feel bad, feel worse about themselves.
Been there, done that! Stand your ground! Once they figure out your not going anywhere and that they are not in competition then I guarantee it will be better. They are old enuff to know better but sound childish. I went thru the same thing. 3 years later and now they come to me for advice and thank me. Stick with it. Good luck!
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Just give them time dont force orr hurry them
Don’t do it! The sa.e thing happened to me m.y years ago. I was so unhappy and miserable. 36 yrs have past, looking back it wSnt worth it, except for my children. It doesn’t get better, no matter how much you try to make it better. IT XOES NOT GET BETTER, only worse. Don’t do it.
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“Touchy feely” ?? like that’s their dad why are you being so weird? Get over yourself for real! His kids will always come before you. Period.
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You need to have a serious conversation before marrying this guy but he needs to be a husband a man and be mature enough to make these teenagers understand this is the way things is going to be if not then if he not man enough to do that then it won’t work they will mess up your marriage I would not even put my self in that position and live like that .
is it inappropriate or are you projecting and sexualizing random encounters
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Its something you’d have to talk to him about bc its up to him to deal with.
Also right now you’re thinking about you(which is kind of understandable), but these kids have trauma. They have a father figure thats not even their dad, so its probably safe to assume their father isn’t close to them, which can cause an abandonment issues. Now you’re about to marry their father figure that they’re are probably afraid to lose. You can work on bonding with them and reassuring them or you can grow to be the enemy. May the best choice be yours.
I guess it depends on how you entered into the relationship.
If you were dating him before he left his previous marriage you can forget about those girls ever having respect for you and rightly so.
It actually is up to your partner to pull those girls into place
If he isn’t willing to do that maybe the feeling you have are more one sided.
And the girls being touchy-feely could be a way to make you uncomfortable or their could be something else going on
But he being a dad/stepdad again should pull that in line.
He’s a father figure because he was their dad . Period . You’re going to look like a wicked witch if you run around claiming his kids are inappropriately affectionate or that they are using him. Start by not trashing talking , his children come first .
He sounds like my ex… I left because it wasn’t worth it for me
You’re upset that his stepdaughters are “touchy feely”? Sounds like jealousy tbh
“Is” marrying? Still time to get out? What it is about the guy – or the situation – that makes marriage so compelling? She loves HIM; what do we know about his regard for her? How long has she been entangled with him, how long he had been apart from the ex before that, where is the girls’ biological father? Is he involved in their lives? What led to the marriages ending? Sounds like everyone has baggage that won’t go away without help, but what are the chances of that happening? I can’t see anything good about the impending marriage, from what we know of the situation. If she entered into counseling, would she gain strength and direction, perhaps able to steer things to a better place, or end up just coping (or appearing to cope) in an unchanging situation, putting herself deeper into a corner?
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He is going to have to handle it…you cannot…He has to set the limit with the girls…and his ex…He needs to explain that you will never be their mother…and do not ask them to call you mum …First name only…Back off…but he needs to ask them to not be so kissy feely…that is not appropriate either…Even in a together marriage…when they are a certain age…that is not at all appropriiate…and could be considered something to report to the courts…They may need some counciling…to correct their thinking…but you need to realize that you marrying him is not going to be easy…so unless you are willing to go slow with those two girls then postpone this marriage for a while…
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If he can’t see the manipulation of teenagers,then he is not doing his part as a parent,allowing your children to treat someone in such a manner is basically saying they can treat anyone like that! He needs to man up and teach his children the respectful way to treat someone,My kids got and get a zero pass on treating myself or others like door mats!
Ugh, my step-kids do the same thing. Do things to purposely cause issues, talk shit about me, complete disrespect. Makes living in the house absolutely miserable. I often wonder if they are trying to sabotage the marriage.
My experience. I realized that his kids wouldn’t accept me. The kids come first. We dated for 16 years until all of our kids were grown and had had flown the coup. (They were a lot younger). Then we got married. Now we all get along just fine. In the meantime I did small things to begin to win their hearts.
I hate to say it but your fiancee needs to step up and put these kids straight! If he loves you, he should be supporting you and your relationship! Teenagers can be nasty and selfish. They need to know their actions are not welcome AND will not work! End of story. If your fiancee will not support you, you may need to re-think your relationship.
walk away, the battle has already begun! The boundaries you thought you had have been overstepped! His girls will never respect you because he has let them get away with belittling you for some time. A battle you would be better off out of!
speak up OR forever hold you piece. Do not marry him until you get his children straightened out. DO NOT.
They’ll be adults with their own lives before you can blink and they won’t be around much. Just deal with it until then. My therapist once told me to stop reacting to others’ treatment of me. She said, “You be you”. If you’re a nice person. Be a nice person. Their behavior is on them. As to how they treat him, that’s his issue…not yours. If he’s okay with it, then you shouldn’t be worried about it. At the end of the day, they’re teenaged girls. Consider the source.
I’m sorry, everyone’s talking about the girls being manipulative, & that sucks, but what do you mean by “touchy-feely”?? This post makes it seem sexual, & if so, then I don’t care how much you love this man or want to get to know is daughters, you RUN.
PLEASE, correct me if I’m wrong. Was it meant to be on an emotional level?
make sure you can handle it down the road because it won’t change. steps are hard, trust me. loving someone sometimes just isn’t enough to warrant staying in a toxic or hostile situation
Walk away or heartache will be coming your way
Don’t be jealous, they are kids be nice .move closer to him
Ignore them you owe them nothing he has a relationship they are his kids you don’t need to say anything but hello let HIM-decide what is most important to him if it’s not you get out of there
Can you define the ‘touchy-feely’ behaviours?
Run!!! He will never pick you over his “kids” 
. It sounds like an unhealthy situation long before you were involved!!! I’d get out before those little bitches ruin your life!!! Teenage girls are literally Satan!!! They don’t give a shit about anything or anyone other then their selves!!! Run!!! Girl don’t walk run!!! Something isn’t right here 
That’s weird af you called his daughters affection inappropriate. If you truly think there’s creepy vibes there why would you want to even marry a man with inappropriate boundaries towards his own kids?
This is a situation I dont see getting better only worse
This is why I don’t date men with kids. The 18 yo is an adult and would get treated like one 
I would have a serious talk with him and if that doesn’t work then I would leave. Yeah you love him but you don’t wanna live miserable
Kids can be very manipulate. And girls will use sex to get what they want
He may not realize what they are doing. YOU need to talk to him then he needs to tell the girls to stop
They are young adults and need to stop this behavior. When they start he needs to tell them to stop it right there. Or tell them to leave his home .now.