I found a strapless bra under my bed and before i freak out im trying to think of a logical answer as to why its there…we just moved in this house a month ago so it def was not there then, i do not have sisters and we do not do laundry at a laundry mat…it is not mine as i am a size large and this is very small…please help me before i lose it
Take deep breaths! I don’t know that anybody can give you the right answer here, but I can tell you what I think I would do…or wished I would have done in hindsight because I’m sure I’d lose it to. I have had the unpleasant experience of walking in on my husband and another woman in the act in our bedrooom, so I’m not shooting blind here. We all survived so I guess I can say I could’ve handled it worse! Still, I think about the situation from time to time and now that I can see more clearly, my logic has determined ways that I could’ve responded if my emotions would have stepped aside at the time. Easier said than done, but for what it is worth…stay calm, breath deep, and try to clear your mind and your heart of the emotional feelings that may cause you to respond in ways you will regret later. You might need some time! If so and if possible, make those arrangements asap and get going for a day or two just to gather your sensibility and plan of action pending all potential outcomes so that your emotions will be better prepared.
Do you have any pets that could have dragged in something they found outside? Since you’ve only been there a month is it possible that anyone who helped you move could have left something behind after showering or changing clothes? If there’s any way possible it could belong to another woman that you know for certain has been in your home then you should ask her if she left/lost anything while there or when visiting. If so, ask if she can further describe it so you can return it. If none of that applies and you know it’s not his size or he’s not the cross dressing type (you’d be surprised at some manly men who are!), then you really have no other choice but to either confront him with questions about the find, or setup a hidden camera and observe what’s going on when you’re away.
Of course the most logical impulse response is to ask him what he knows about it. If he immediately responds with a dreaded truth that devestates you, I’d be genuinely surprised because that’s highly unlikely if he’s actually guilty of what it looks like on the surface. I would expect denial and complete surprise just as you felt when found. Honestly, in hindsight I’d go with plan B and get to setting up a hidden camera and keep it to myself!
So maybe my best advice is for you to imagine your future self looking back on the situation. (Or advising a good friend from the outside looking in) What would you kick yourself for doing or not doing when faced with this decision and then act accordingly based on that determination. Good luck! Love, light, & peace be with you!
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I found a strapless bra under my bed and it isn't mine
Do you have a daughter ?
Ask your siblings if it’s theirs. Then you’ll know.
Help you what? You clearly know what’s going on.
I personally would set it on the table in front of my so and simply ask him who’s it is.
Have you had any friends over lately?
Maybe a family member? If not, I dunno. It didn’t grow under there.
If you do not have any kids, your husband has some explaining to do
There isn’t a answer you want to hear right now.
I feel like you already know the answer. Personally, I think you should put it in front of him and ask him. You’ll be able to tell by his facial expressions if it’s anything to do with him xx
Well if it wasn’t there when you moved in and doesnt belong to your kids and you haven’t had company over that changed clothes in your room then I’d ask your husband
I would like a updated story with the outcome
Girl fuck that lose it
He’s probably toggling nip nops that aren’t yours.
Show it to your partner just say look what I found under our bed his reaction is all you’ll need
What you need help with?
Girl you kno the answer to this
don’t beat around the bush trying to find every reason it’s not the mistresses.
There’s and answer for it
You obviously know what’s going on since you cleared any other reason
I think the most logical way to approach this is sit down with your spouse and speak about it. You guys don’t have any kids? nieces? best friend?
Serve it in his dinner plate… watch the look on his face!
Were you the one who moved your bed into your place ? If it wasn’t there when you moved your things in … what does that tell you . Surely you would remember finding it before .
Put it somewhere ur man will notice
I’m sure in ur heart u know the answer
Tack it up like a taxidermy and make it a conversation that has to happen
It’s pretty obvious there was a woman in ur home
That’s pretty bold to cheat in your own home
Hopefully that isn’t the case here
I think you already know… kick him to the curb…
I’m sorry to be the one that breaks it to ya but your man is cheating!
I serve it to him on a plate for supper and ask him to start explaining. He is cheating on you
Ummmm if it’s not yours, what do you need help with? There’s been another woman in your bedroom.
Get your ducks in a row. Set up cameras on your house.
Put it in his dresser drawer! Right on top
Girl I would have lost my shit before asking FB! Us latinas fight first then ask questions! sometimes it be like that!
Do you have a dog? Put it on the dog right before he comes home from work and record his reaction.
I think you already know tho
Do u have any teenage boys or girls…babysitters?
Put it on the bed and as you go up to bed say “that is not mine so do you have any idea who’s it is?” Watch his reaction very carefully.
But before you do this, I’d also be looking at his phone.
Well, there was another woman in your home and she took off her bra while there. Probably “forgot” it on purpose so you would find it.
Pull it out in front of your other half, don’t say a word… Their face will tell you all you need to know.
Have you Been gone long enough for him to have someone in?
Keep it and have it laid out when he gets home and ask him whose it is. But the answer is clear here! You deserve better
Women leave things behind to let other women know that a woman has been there. I’d go balls to the walls on his ahhh
Set up a camera and go away for the day. You will know.
Maybe it’s your man’s bra
Stop trying to rationalise and find excuses. Your partner had cheated. Time to kick them to the braless woman
Put it where he will notice if he moves it then he’s guilty
Serve it along with his dinner. Ask him if he had his dessert already.
… Plot twist: what if it’s actually your partner’s, and he has a secret fetish for cross dressing? Will you lose it still, feel guilty about it afterwards, and embarrass him in the process?
Just pack up, and drain the bank account on ur way out. It’s over
U know whats going on
You know damn well it’s another woman’s
Losing it means losing your power… both to think clearly and to notice lies. I know that’s hard but you don’t want to miss ques and signals that are very important.
Now, be very calm when you ask your significant other about it. Be straightforward and calm. Allow them to speak as much as possible, so they can hang themselves with their own words. After they speak, remove yourself from the room and tell them you need space to think.
Then think. Take all the time you need to do so. Do not make any decisions based on your emotions and keep your hands to yourself, trust me on that
In the end, people show you their true colours. Don’t waste your precious youth trying to repaint them.
And know that whatever this may be, it says NOTHING ABOUT YOU.
First go to the store/online and order some exotic/rare/endangered flowers, some good quality soil, and all the fixings for a large garden bed.
Second go get yourself a back hoe because your going to need to dig a really big hole that goes very deep and ammend the soil properly
Third, insert manfertilizer into the hole first, cover with good quality garden soil, make sure to build up your new garden bed with good sturdy landscaping stones and lots of them. Then plant your new garden and watch it grow!
Now you have solved 2 problems.
There is only one reasonable explanation for this. Mistress was trying to mark her territory…
Put it somewhere he’ll find it in front of you and watch his reaction.
Add some fabric to it and just wear around the house in front of your husband… Film his reaction. He won’t be able to hide the guilt.
Its not yours you all ready know the answer and whst you gotta do.
Ask him! And update us.
He’s cheating. She’s been at your house. She knows about you. She left it on purpose.
If you want proof here you go. Order a blink on Amazon for $30. Put it in his underwear drawer… then set a blink camera up behind. See if he hides it. There is your answer.
I’ve been married 11 years. No issues. We’re happy I’m just inventive as Shit and use blink cameras in the loft and the little boys room.
Do you have any teenagers??
If not , then you know.
And fyi she didnt walk out without it not knowing. That was done on purpose if thats the case !
A dog? Stuff like this happens when someone gives us clothes and one of us forgets to tell the other
She was telling you without telling you and she’s not going anywhere let her have him
Girl set that thing on the table where he can see it and wait for his ass to get home as the woman that went through that already for one he’s gonna say “it was a mistake” and tell you “it won’t happen again” don’t listen he will. You know womens intuition isn’t wrong trust yourself. If you don’t trust yourself you can’t trust anyone
Put it on the bed for him to find tell him he can leave and take it with him
I found a woman’s watch tucked on the side of my bed once and almost lost my mind. It was my friend’s, I had forgotten that she lost it when we were hanging out together.
Sounds like a lady might have left it there on purpose… just saying.
Keep your cool, get your evidence, save your money like a squirrel getting ready for winter, then confront him with divorce papers…
Honey you know the answer, there is no explanation other than he’s cheating. I’ve been there! If he’s not cheating, then maybe he enjoys dressing in women’s clothing. Have you had any of your friend’s over and maybe she left it?
Leave in silence. Take some money while you’re at it.
I found a massive pair of boxers and knew ide done nothing turnt out they were in the back of the airing cupboard and the boiler man pulled em out and they stretched wen he changed the water tank felt like I had to explain myself wen I knew it wernt me
Just cause I’m nosy…I want to hear what happened with this one:thinking:
First of all you already know on your heart. There is 0 reason to scream or fuss. The fact you found it says yall are past over. Either day nothing and keep your mouth closed and start paying more attention until you have 100% proof or just go on and pack
Another girl isn’t gonna throw their bra under the bed unless they want you to see it and not be so obvious. You just don’t know how long it been there. Most girls want their bras.
Sorry Mamma but it’s not looking good. You have taken all explanations out. Most likely left there bc chicks like to leave evidence so the other chick gets mad and dude is left and she gets dude. Typical thot behavior
Um…”Hey, I found this under the bed, and it isn’t mine. Super weird. Any ideas?”
Y’know….talk to the man? I’d start there before I let myself go crazy with assumptions and what-if’s.
Set up a camera and hit a day spa
What do you mean? It wasn’t there before. You don’t have sisters. Do you have children? A babysitter? Housekeeper? A family member/friend, man or woman, who stayed at your home in the last month? If the answer to all of those questions is no then the only other person who is responsible for it being there is your husband. He is either a cross dresser or had someone in your bedroom who needed to take off their strapless bra.
Straight up ask him. Be calm but firm. If he admits it’s another womens then
Do u have pets? Could it have been brought inside by one of them?
It’s mine, sorry about that.
What do you want us to help you with? It’s not yours. So I think you unfortunately already know the answer ￼
Don’t lose it, let that dude go!!
Do you really have to ask a question you already know the answer to
Think of anyone you know it may fit……that’s your first clue
Maybe he’s struggling with his gender identity
The laundry fairy dropped it off at the wrong house.
Did he find it and think it was yours and just tossed it which lead it getting pushed under the bed? You just moving in I’d maybe try to figure out the size of last people that lived there. Do you have a daughter? Maybe a friends of hers? Everyone is so quick to cheating but she never stated she questioned him before this.
Girl lose your shit do what you want cuz regardless of what you do it doesn’t change the fact you found someone else’s bra in your spot. So do you boo
Put it on Fb (do you have him on Fb if so block him on the picture) and put it to not be public (I bet if it’s someone they are already looking at your Fb.) say. Lost tiny bra. It’s not mine, cause I’m not in the training stage. My boobs are to big for this. Really want to tiny owner to find their tiny bra. Being you blocked your man from the post he can’t see it and if you hear about it. Only way was the side tiny piece.
Here for the update.
I’d serve it to him for supper with a nice side of get out
Put it on his pillow and see how he reacts.
Could be your partner, trying out his kinky side
Its not yours…You’ve established this…no reason for it to be there…so are you going to stay or leave…ball is in your court
Well you’re being cheated on I don’t know what you want us to do for you