Leave him he doesnt respect you
Iāve been in your exact situation. Hes done, hes checked out. He of truly loved you he wouldnāt put you through this. His eyes are on someone else. For me this is already cheating.
Girl find yourself. Take care of yourself. Do things for you.
You need to start checking out as well. It doesnāt seem like it but in the long run you and your kids will be happier without him.
Your kids deserve to see you happy too
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This hits home for me on SO many levels. Like you mentioned your gut knows what to doā¦LEAVE. He blames you for this that and everything else. WRONG!! He is a grown ass man who needs to take responsibly for his actions! You didnt make him do this, he did. Run, run as fast as you can. You will become a much better person because of it. My kids are better because I said enough!
I would say to him so then if I feel youāre rejecting me or youāre too tired to give me attention then itās okay for me to talk to my old boyfriends right, because what is good enough for the gander is also good enough for the goose right!
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When people show you who they are believe them the first time. You deserve better. Heās trying to place blame on you to make you feel guilty and give him another pass. Iād be out the door. He wonāt stop. Heāll just hide it better.
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You need to sit down with him after the kids are asleep & talk about helping you out around the house, you need to talk to him about your marriage & if this doesnāt work or happen, leave !
Why still put up with him ? Leave asap
Get rid of him. Omg. Sounds like a total liar. You donāt deserve that. Move on and forget about him.
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Omg leave him he is cheating on you and he is going to keep talking to his ex gfs. He knows you will not leave and you will keep doing it over and over again.
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So go an find you a good man. They are out there.an he told you too.by doing what heās doing. GL.
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Get out. Heās making a fool of you. Or stay if you donāt mind always being 2nd.
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Divorce his ass. He aināt nothing.
Sweet heart you are the only one left in that marriage because he checked out a long time ago. Itās time to move on and cut your losses because heās NOT going to stop cheating. Heās going to get better at hiding it.
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So you both work full time then you come home and get to cook and clean up and take care of the kidsā¦ that is NOT a partnership. Then he is going behind your back and sorry but to me sexting is cheating. Do you want your relationship to be a model for your kids? For your son to think thats how you treat a woman or your daughter to feel like its acceptable to be treated that way?
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If he blamed you for his behavior, I doubt heās truly remorseful.
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Heās a pig. Let him go.
Leave. Seriously. Heās done with you. You need to be done with him.
It takes two to make a baby, it takes two to raise a family, work or not the house runs on two people making it work, if he loved u he would help out with house and children so your not so tired coz if he did he and you both benefit at the end of day no time for cheating shit.
Heās a cheater he doesnāt love you Iām sorry been through it get a new life with someone you deserve
Kick him to the curb
He has done it before and will do it again. No matter what he says to you. IMO, he is a little b*tch if he acted that way about the pregnancy and after. I sure as hell wouldnt have stayed and put up with that. He is done with you and the relationship. He doesnt love you, or he wouldnāt have done that and continued to do so.
Let me say this loud and clear : YOU SHOULD NEVER STAY IN AN UNHAPPY RELATIONSHIP JUST FOR THE KIDS. The kids should be the reason you want better than that
Narcissistā¦look it up. Gaslightingā¦look that up to. Simply put> He only cares about himself and puts the blame on you (has you thinking that because life had you busy and worn down that YOU are at fault for not āgiving him attentionā) when he is in the wrong. Itās all a crock of BS and Iām sorry honey but these type of people rarely give you or a relationship what it needs to thrive. So, if you want to spend the rest of your life feeling like you do now (OR WORSE) ā¦then keep doing what youāre doing.
Get rid of this loserā¦
Follow your instinct. You want your children to have a good exsamle of what a healthy relationship is.
Heād be gone like yesterday
Honey, I am all for making a marriage work but when you are married it takes two all the time even without children. Get your finances in order , pack his bags and have him served with divorce papers you are doing it all now except for some money from him the courts will set that up. Also change the locks on your home let him set up new life. You are worthy of something better
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He sounds so incredibly toxic and he will not change. You deserve betterā¦ and I dont believe for a sec that nothing happened when he met up with the one ex.
It will not change, this seems to be a problematic cycle with him and cheaters rarely change. Cut your losses. I know that is easier said than done, but trust me, you will regret it if you give him your trust and the children will pay the price. I speak from experience.
I donāt say this because I am pro-marriage try everything first but itās time to prepare your life without him, let him go so you can heal
Itās time to go Iām sorry but you know heās lying when he said nothing happened if it was true he wouldnāt of met her out of town and he wouldnāt of hid it from you your a woman you already know what you need to do Iām praying 
for you
He only thinks of himself. Hes selfish and has the audacity to blame you for his cheating. Youāre in for a world of pain if you continue to stay with him. He wont change.
What exactly are you trying to save? Sounds like you want to try for the man you hope heāll be, because if youāre trying for the man that he actually is he will continue to hurt you. It isnāt easy but let him go and hopefully one day find a real man.
This will be the rest of your life if you stay with him. Hell always tell you hell do better and then start again later. Could be a month or it could be two years, but it will happen again.
NEVER stay in a relationship because of a child. Eventually that child will notice something is op
You know what you have to do. As hard as it might seem you will be better off
He blamed you for his indiscretion, not just once but TWICE!
Stop making excuses and start working on doing better for yourself and your children. Donāt wait for him to do it again, because he will.
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Heās a liar. Heāll tell you what you want to hear.
Please move on. He is never going to stop
I will make this simple for you, a man that truly loves you would never put you through any of that. Just leave, it isnt worth it.
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All I can say is demand more for yourself! Demand more of an example for your children! He has clearly shown you who he is and how little he respects youā¦donāt settle for that. Your children deserve to see their mom happy and loved properly.
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Iām all for working out your marriage and staying together but cheating and intent of cheating are just not acceptable. Thereās absolutely no excuse and it likely wonāt change. Never play 2nd fiddle!
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If you want to give him another chance, you should. But he is being very disrespectful to you, and you feel disgusted by him. Those are hallmarks for āthis marriage wonāt survive.ā You should probably move on.
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He will continue to act this way ! Because thereās no consequences for his behavior ! He knows you will be right there for him , cause you love him !
āWhen someone shows you who they are, believe themā He is a liar and isnāt worth trusting. What more proof are you looking for?
AGAIN! What does this have to do with āMy Husband is a Blessing ā Your FB posts are a joke! 
Get it together!
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I havenāt read these comments BUT, if youāre taking care of the kids / cleaning and working FT ā¦ youāre āaloneā already and heās just stressing you and dragging you down. Donāt stay for the kids, get out ā¦ BE HAPPY and your kids will benefit from that. 
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Amen been married 17 years just to find out heās sleeping with a bartender but itās all my fault for kicking him out for lieng and cheating it hurts but let her take care of him do you Iām doing me and need to stop depending on a man that canāt show love we deserve better
He will never change. Trust me. You are an afterthought. He doesnāt take your marriage seriously and blaming you keeps you BOTH feeling it is your fault. You owe it to yourself and your kids to not let yourself be a doormat. You deserve a happy life. If your marriage is already this bad, it is only going to progressively get worse. Donāt take that $h!t anymore! You deserve to have a happy life. He will continue to have everything his way regardless if you are in his life or not. Your feelings do not matter to him and they never will be important to him. You deserve MORE!
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I despise it when a man blames his wife for not being intimate enough , it for not taking care of āhis needsā! Sounds like he needs to step up and be a man and take care of his family. He also needs to stop taking you for granted. You work just as hard as he does but yet you take care of the children and the house? He isnāt a man at all! Iād tell him to hit the road unless he couldāve a grownup and take care of his responsibilities. He doesnāt appreciate you and it doesnāt sound like he ever will. You deserve better !
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I would honestly pack it in, it wont change he wont change and you will always be the blame, it isnt worth hoping someone will turn into a better person they never do. Just cut it now and start a new life with your little ones.
Trust the behavior over the words. To succeed, a marriage must be built on a foundation of trust. Make your expectations crystal clear, and be certain you understand his. From that point forward, treat exceptions as what they areā¦no excuses. Vows are VOWS.
2 critical things to consider:::
- In youth, men pursue women ārelentlesslyā for sex. Women, no matter how careful, always have a lingering concern about pregnancyā¦andā¦women are often (still) buried in work, raising the current kids, taking care of the home, etc. ā¦ Exhaustion is not a great recipe for amazing sex. As a result, sex often becomes a toolā¦used to negotiate for meeting other needs: We only have a little timeā¦so, if you do something āspecialā for me, then, i will do x for youā¦ When that happens, intimacy can be lost, and partners can shut down or stray.
2. Later in life, when women are no longer under threat of pregnancy, and their workload at home and in the family lIghtens as the kids move on/out, men are often not so interestedā¦Physiologically, testosterone drops, stress climbs, and bodies are not the same as they were in youth. Soooo, when women really start to chase their men, men are often ābeen there, done thatā and not so interested or willing or potentially able.
As a result, it is soooo important to set expectations and prioritiesā¦together.
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It wonāt stop. I went thru Similar stuff with my ex. We were married 20 years and he tried to say they were just friends. It was my fault. I drove him to it. Donāt listen. Life is to short to be unhappy and miserable. And when thereās no trust thatās what it will be. My current husband of 14 years is truly a God send. He treats me so well and with so much respect. I never knew what it was to be as good as he treats me. In the beginning I didnāt know how to act. I had never been treated so good. Thatās what you should feel.
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As women we go through what we allow our spouses to do to us by accepting and giving chance after chance. Sometimes the best thing to do is to walk away. You can always have a civil relationship separated but if the trust is gone then your foundation is broken. He obviously doesnāt care how he is making you look and flips it into you being the bad guy and doesnāt own up to his wrongs.
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No Iām sorry you have to leave him and move on once again you canāt stay for the childās sake he will never change and it will only get worse and he will end up having sex with someone other than you you should get out now I was married for 25 years found out he was lying to me and cheating on me the last 3 years of our marriage I left him 6 months ago we donāt have kids together but leaving was the best decision I have made in a long time Iām happier now I enjoy my life again you need to be strong and leave your not happy so the child wonāt be happy either you will be fine once you leave
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You are wasting your time on a useless man who canāt control himself. Youāre supposed to confide in and lean on each other as a loving team, he is a narcissist. Good luck. You deserve way more than what youāve been dealing withā¦
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I would have left during the pregnancy. Listen to your gut, your intuition wonāt lie. Itās better to have a split family than to allow your child to see you endure that kind of treatment.
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You can only do whatās best for you. however if I was in your shoes this would be over. in fact would have been over before this for me. but the facts are this physical or not what he is doing is still cheating
Cut and run. He wonāt change.
Well in those words you just wrote 3 times he was guilty an blamed it on you all three times āan you accepted it every timeāā he knows that he can have his cake and eat it tooāāā hes not going to stop āā unless you give him an ultimatum an you stand by itāā this you are going to have to stand your groundā'or dont an you will be stuck right where you are at!!!
Kick him to the curb! Personally, i think you have already gave him too many chances. You can pretty much book it, he has stepped out on you. The reason you still in the picture he is using you to take care of the kids . No one needs to be treated with such disrespect. He is playing the blame game with you, to make him feel better. In the eyes of God you have every right to Divorce him. And donāt feel guilty, cause it sounds like he did this to you, and your children.
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I think you have been trying to work th Iāll things out. I donāt think this is acceptable behavior. As scary as it is I personally think you should make him leave. The law is on your side as far as child support. Even if you have to start over completely your happiness and your childrenās are worth it
The fact that heās blaming you for his shady behavior tells you all you need to know. You deserve better. If the kids are sick, you should BOTH be pitching in and taking care of them and the house. It shouldnāt all be on you while he gets his ego stroked by other women.
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Once you talked an he " promised" to never do it again and he did it again Idc who is the feather ! I would pack my things and the babies things and I would leave him like a bad habit ! The next day I would be down at the courthouse filing for a divorce and getting him for child support !
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Cheaters never change. Leave and find a man that respects you and is understanding that you are a mother first. Youāre both parents. A parents job is never done. Those are just excuses. God gave him a hand for a reason, and pornā¦ nothing is a good enough excuse to be sexting someone else especially when you are married. Thatās cheating.
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You answered your own question. Cheaters always cheat again at some point. Get your ducks lined up and show him the door. Thereās no trust, thereās no relationship. So sorry, good luck!
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Heās never treated you well, and heās not going to start. Heās going to cheat, thatās not going to stop, and I can tell you itās already happening. You donāt want your kids to look at your marriage and think thatās the way it should be, and you donāt deserve to be unhappy and treated like an option. Itās his fault to if heās not helping in the house just like getting pregnant was not your fault alone. You can do better than someone who treats you this way
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He wonāt change! Sure he will be fine for awhile but these behaviors wonāt stop! Get out before itās too late.
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The only true way to work it out(per say) is a marriage counselor because trust me it will get worse,with that said You deserve way better and a husband who treats like a queen( i actually prayed to find a true Christian Man,because the trick is putting GOD at the center of your marriage,personally mine has lasted 18 yrs this September,The reason I sAY IT will get worse I lost my children to DHS due to the fighting from my second husband,I just found them again after 20 years.
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I wouldnāt put up with it at all. I would probably divorce him.
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Sounds like heās selfish and only thinking of himself. It takes 2 to make a baby! Iād be throwing a hissy fit and demand he stop messing around with the other woman!!!
What do you think he meant by not getting the attention he needed?
Itās simpleā¦get the hell out of that relationship. No excusesā¦just move onā¦
Honestly Iād try counsing for 6mo first if no changes then Iād reevaluate the marriage
He refused intimacy for 19 months?! Girl please. You already know the answer to this question
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He is inflicting emotional abuse. I would probably ask him to leave if he is so miserable. Maybe he needs to be more assistive.
Doesnt matter if you have children together. Cheater will always be a cheater especially if it has happened again. Ypu have to be strong for your kids and want better for your kids. Not everyone is a cheater. Their are good men out there. You deserve better than that. Only God will get you through this so you better learn on him and surrender all your worries to him. And for him to blame you for getting pregnant hes a Posā¦ you didnt do it by yourself.
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Runā¦ what you allow will continue. You deserve better
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Good griefā¦life ia too short. Move on!!!
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Youāre instincts are always right
Trust your gutā¦ to quote dr Philā¦ better to be from a broken home than to live in oneā¦
You deserve better. And your children deserve to see you loved properlyā¦ not like this.
His shit behavior in the beginning when you were pregnant was a major red flag. Also, how would he feel if you were sexting your ex bfs, met up with one while out of town and conveniently didnt tell you until you confronted him. You can find another man, a better man.
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It doies not help the kids to stay together you should be happy. So your kids will be happy
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You deserve better. Let the ex have him back.
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We need to roll out and whoop somebodyās ass! Roll by and pick me up! 
The fact that you even need advice on this situation is pathetic!
This man is a cancer get rid of him and never look back
Once a cheater always a cheater time to say bye bye or put up with his cheating and suffer with it !
Bye bye - donāt let your children see this
I donāt think you need advice, you know what you need to do.
He is playing you donāt allow it!
Girl always go with your gut feeling cause it will stir you wrong
Leave. Heās acting like heās already single.
I didnāt even read ā¦ all this advice: KICK HIS ASS TO THE CURB NOW!!!
You are Fine China,donāt let Anyone treat you like a paper plate!
Plain and simple leave!
Leave. You teach people how to treat you.
Kick him to the curb, and move on. Life is short.
I will say this again. IGNORING THE RED FLAGS BECAUSE YOU WANNA SEE THE GOOD IN PEOPLE WILL COST YOU!
Read that again!
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Heās a cheater. Cut your losses. They never change