Recently I’ve really begun to resent my husband. He told me about a month ago that it was hard to be attracted to me bc of my weight. I try to eat healthy, which I don’t always. I leave for work at 7 am and don’t get home until 6:30 pm. At that point I’m cooking dinner, taking care of our toddler and cleaning. I just quit breastfeeding, so I’m hoping that transition will help me work out when he goes to bed. My problem is that I just feel disgust for my husband and feel hatred for him every single day. Am I being too hard on him, or should I understand where he’s coming from since I haven’t been able to lose the 30 pound baby weight? On a side note, we did go to counseling once and I had so much anxiety talking to someone about our issues, I couldn’t get the courage to go again.
Honey, your husband should love you no matter what size you are. I don’t really have advice on what you should do. But I’m sorry you’re in this situation
Either way its hurtful… you were digging into him to see what was up with why certain things weren’t happening or whatever. Did he just tell you that out of the blue?? It does hurt but I would definitely take that into consideration.
Does he help out? Only 30 lbs! Girl you’re lucky. You have to be open for therapy to work. I hate men that put the mother of children down. Like it takes almost a year to grow a baby it can take that much or longer to take the weight off. Woman’s bodies are unique in how we work.
I would have disgust and hatred for him too. You brought his child into the bloody world. You grew a person and fed that person. Your body isnt the same as before even if you put no weight on. He should love you no matter what I’m sure hes not Tom Hardy and has changed over the years of knowing him. We age, we change, we are still us! if you want to lose weight for you great but i wouldn’t put pressure on yourself for him you’re a working mother for goodness sake
Go back to therapy. Get the unbiased opinion and help. And if you hate him that much then it’s time to leave. Why stay if you’re not happy? If he disgusts you that bad and you resent him that much leave him so he can find somebody else that actually wants to be with him and make him happy.
I say you’re not overreacting and if I were you I would tell him off. Let him cook dinner and take care of the kids. Let him do all the cleaning. That you birthed a child for him and he’s an ungrateful asshole. Tell him is gross behavior is unattractive and you won’t be with him until he changes his personality.
30 pounds isn’t anything! I’ve gained about 50 and my husband still thinks I don’t need to lose a single pound unless I want to.
I’m gonna be probably the one with all the backlash here but - I know it hurts, but at least he’s actually being honest with you. I’m guessing he didn’t just come out with it (just an assumption from the way it’s written) but women always go on about men keeping things from them - he’s actually trying. If you’re happy with your weight, that’s fine! It’s something you would have to talk about and work through. Don’t lose weight for him. But I have no doubt that he hasn’t stopped loving you, this is about attraction. Maybe try and do more couple things together, explain how much it’s hurt you by all means. But don’t crucify the guy for being honest x
Im not surprised you resent him, why isnt he cooking dinner or helping with the toddler? Youve just grown a human!!! Im assuming he s built like a greek god and is so perfect he feels he can criticise? If counselling will work i d give it a go hun, maybe on your own? but sounds like he s a complete prick and you might be better off on your own (my first husband was like this, made me question my sanity, was a bully, got in at me about my baby weight etc) . You deserve a man that loves you and respect s you, is involved with your child etc, please don’t settle xx
Tell him that it’s hard to love his shitty personality, and walk out that door girl
You have every right to he upset about this and feel this way. No man should say that to a woman, especially after she recently gave birth to his child. Sorry that he said that and I hope you know you’re beautiful and he deserves whatever disgust you feel towards him right now.
HOW DARE HE.
He has or is thinking about having an affair. He feels guilty about it and is trying to put a wedge between you so when you find out it will be your fault. Ignore him. Join a child friendly gym I know it is early but you didn’t say who takes care of baby so I would assume she goes to daycare. Get up go to gym, get with trainer and nutritionist start doing your thing. Drop baby off a daycare go to work or do it after work. You need a inexpensive gym with trainer, nutritionist, babysitter. Go on diet nutritionist puts you on
Stay in your large clothes so no will notice, once you loss your weight get a new worerode. As far as him he has show his colors it is up to you if you want to go back to consulting or leave once you get down to fight weight class. I think you will see that after you work on you the consulting will come much easier. If he is violate go to shelter with baby they will help you start over with a clear mind and new body. I know it sounds like everyone is telling you to leave every one told me that too. That is up to you if that is not where you are at and don’t need that kind of help don’t leave. But I think the gym loss weight as a surprise and present For You is best and don’t tell anyone. If it is hard remember your goal is Your. God bless you and may his blessing fall down on you only you can change you.
My husband and I had a baby before we married the 15th of last month. Our son is 9 months old in a week and I still have 30 pounds of baby weight. At first we planned to wed in 2020 and I planned on dieting and working out the entire time until he said something to me about my weight. He said “I love you just the way you are, I would love you bigger, I would love you smaller, I don’t care this is it for me, I love you.” I cherish that so much and every woman deserves a man who feels that way about them. Your body made an entire human being, it is okay to take time getting back, and if you/we never get back that is okay too because we aren’t the same person before we became moms.
“Its not easy being turned on by that little sausage… I’m sick of faking the O”
Sorry… but I’m ruthless when it comes to someone cutting me down… Yes… my comebacks are fast and wicked…
So hes a dick. You’re beautiful. Please dont let him get you down.
I put on and lost 12 stone having 2 kiddys and now pregnant with number 3 so iv popped a bit back on since iv been with my husband and every day since he met me tells me how beautiful I am and how lucky he is to be my husband never once has my weight changed that your husband should be in awe of you look what you made for him and do for him he needs a kick in the teeth ! And you need an apology how rude
Don’t show sympathy for low tier men who can’t see beauty in a woman who has carried their child and undergone the emotional and physical changes of pregnancy/child birth.
He is of a weaker sub of men who don’t deserve women at their best.
I can’t wrap my head around these types of men. They aren’t worth the effort.
If i loose weight my husband will leave whats wrong with men
Your husband’s a bag of shit
My husband was attracted to me at every size…if he truly loves you he would love you at any size
Go to the gym for yourself and when you get home ask him why he doesn’t look like the muscley guys at the gym. See how his ego feels 30lbs isn’t much!
Lose weight for yourself not him. My husband was that way. He enrolled me in a gym when he left to go overseas. I had no idea He was unhappy about how I looked. I was about 15 lbs overweight. I traveled an hour to work and hour back then went to the gym. I was living with my parents, no children. I purchased my own food and counted calories. I lost the weight, got down to 105. BUT it was because of him. BUT he never said anything yucky to me. Never put me down. Counseling never was my deal. Talking to a stranger? Then they record how the session went…Nope, not me!!
It’s not that easy to drop baby weight, it takes time and he needs to be more understanding. Work at your pace. He should love you regardless so I can understand some animosity towards him. Might bring it up in next session, it will help to get it out there and work through it.
He really needs to learn to appreciate the fact your body just went through so much for the kid you share. And grow up! I promise you- theirs so many men out there who WILL if he doesnt get his head out of his ass! Make the choice to healthier and feel better for you not bc he made you feel unwanted. And it really shoukd piss you tf off he did that, it does me!
I applaud women to just be themselves and be loved. I was controlled tho silently from my husband. Don’t let that happen to you. Yeah join a gym, there are some you can just go at your own pace which I did. A gym you can take your child hopefully. Tho a toddler may not work. Salads I can make a meal of. Sorry I just feel I know your frustrations personally. Hubby can make dinner for himself and toddler right? .
He’s a pos and you deserve better wheather you gained weight or not your man should love you regaurdless of what you look like that’s not a man hunny
Fuck that lose weight n leave him
Tell him to kiss your butt. He has no class
Look up on fb the healthy mummy…sorry your husband is a dick
I am an overweight woman and my husband has never told me that I was fat or needed to lose weight he said no matter how I am he will always love me and I am beautiful to him so don’t let your husband put you down a great man would never do that
No you carried his baby for nine months
I would tell him that he is not sexually desirable with the loss of brain cells that have apparently occured. Tell him to pick up a biology book.
Does he not understand that YOU MADE A TINY HUMAN INSIDE YOUR BODY? Nature takes its course. Hips spread, fat packs on, your whole body and chemistry makeup change to accommodate another life within you, its literally primal.
During caveman days, if hunting was unsuccessful, they didnt eat therefore the body learned to pack on extra weight to accommodate days where food was scarce. Especially having another human inside you eating too. Men like this make me want to vomit. The fact that your asking if your being too hard on him tells me he has belittled and berated you a lot. If it made you hurt, if it broke your spirit, then no your not being hard on him.
My husband loved me when I was 120lbs, he loved me when I was 175lbs, and he loves me now at 138lbs. I dropped a lot of weight but guess what, having a baby left all sorts of aftermaths. Stretch Mark’s, my hips are wider, I have the mom pudge, I’m nothing like when we first got together. He isnt just attracted to my outward appearance but he loves my heart and soul too. Sounds like he is an asshole and superficial. What a douche bag!!!
I cannot stand men like this. Especially after you have their baby. They think you’re supposed to snap right back. Not taking you into consideration at all. He should love you regardless!!! Lose weight if YOU want to for YOU!!! I think you are 10000% justified in how you feel.
Fuck him. He should love you no matter what.
I have extremely drastic weight fluctuations and my boyfriend has always said I’m sexy/called me beautiful etc. When I talk about how I want to lose weight and things he tells me that he doesn’t mind what size I am but to do what makes me happy. Find someone who is more interested in your mental health than your outward appearance. I have fluctuated from 140 to 220 btw. I’m never tiny but that’s almost 100lbs and it literally doesn’t phase him at all. I like to think it’s because he loves who I am as a person.
Honestly. Fuck your husband. If he cant love you for hawing baby weight after carrying a fucking human being he’s a pos. You carried his child for Pete’s sake would he want to hear his child come to him crying because people were judging them for their weight. Honestly it’s break his heart. He needs to respect you. And this resentment should be talked about to someone. You dont just stop loving someone. You dont just RANDOMLY fall out of love. Once you love someone you’ll always love them. Talk to a counsler about that and about how he treats you. If he isn’t willing to loose weight then he can shut his trap youre beautiful momma
My husband loves me at any weight and so should your husband. But at the same time lose weight for yourself not for him sister.
I can help you lose it! Message me if you want!
I get it. I don’t like the weight I gained either and can definitely tell the difference between my first pregnancy and when I got pregnant this time. I mean, I pretty much gave up the for a minute. I totally get it. I often times don’t want to touch me either I don’t expect him to all of a sudden like me at this new size.
If you aren't happy with your weight lose it, but he just doesn't be a dick about it. My guy just tells me he'll help me.
Check with your doctor, honestly. You may have a medical condition or issues with thyroid post baby. I couldn’t lose weight or barely breathe after having our second. Almost a year later and I was diagnosed with the beginning stages of heart failure due to the c section I had.
Tell him you’re struggling with things or that it hasn’t come ease. Attempt to open the lines of communication about it.
My husband loves me at any weight or size… because he loves me as a person. He’s seen me bounce from 120 to not 120 but always makes me feel like the most beautiful thing in the entire galaxy. We’ve been through a miscarriage, pregnancy and surgery and it’s caused me to gain some weight… but he has never stopped making me feel loved and beautiful.
I’d resent your man too, don’t settle and don’t let him determine your worth
Tell him that the next child he can have and then he can comment on what you are going through .Instead of criticizing you for not being able to achieve Supper Women status he should be too busy helping you to run the household and raise your child.If he isn’t doing any of this then sorry your weight is just an excuse for him to have a go at you.
He has no right to be descusted with your weight… It takes time to loose baby fat!!! My kids dad use to tell me that I need to loose weight but he loved me… I was like no if you loved me you would not say anything about my weight especially when my youngest was still a baby…
Your husband should love you as you are. Don’t loose weight for him do it for yourself. I’d consult with your doctor about trouble with loosing weight.
I hate questions like this… No he should be ashamed of himself for telling you that! When you get married it’s for better or worse because that’s what real love is… You have evedy right to hate his ass for making you feel bad about your body after you have given him a gift of life in a child! You are his wife not just a girlfriend he given you that role for you… He needs to learn to love and respect his own wife!
You have every right to be upset with him, extremely upset with him. You had a child and he should love and respect you even more now than he did before. If he isn’t attracted to you anymore and you resent him so much maybe you should reevaluate things and decide if you truly wanted to be with him.
I’ve gained 40 lbs since I started seeing my husband. No way in hell would he ever say that just out of love and respect
Thirty pounds? That’s what he’s bitching about? That’s not even that much weight gain. Yeah, it’s going to make you look different, but it seems like your life is hectic as is. Do not start working out for someone else, because it should be to make you happy. If you want to work out, let him make dinner and you go work out during this time. The main thing about losing weight is diet. If your job is strenuous enough, you might be able to get away with not working out. Is he willing to eat whatever you cook?
Maybe you should drop a quick 100+ pounds… leave his dumbass…
My fiance has not once ever been rude like that he’s always attracted to me and I have asked him how when I was so big. And he always says “you’ve had 2 kids” it took me 3 months and I lost 30 lbs doing keto. I still hate my body bc it is hard for me with my stretch marks bc I wanna wear a 2 piece and can’t being myself to with my stretch marks. Men who say crap like your too big now I’m not attracted to you are awful and I’m sorry you have to go through that
- He is being an ass.
- You are really tired.
- You made a human. Cut yourself some slack.
So, if he said it without yelling or calling you names I think he was just trying to be honest with you about how he is thinking or feeling.
Ask him to get active with you. The two of you can take your child for a walk, get a running stroller and start running together.
There is nothing wrong with him being honest about how your added weight makes him feel unattracted to you. That’s not saying he doesn’t love you still.
If my ex gained thirty lbs he would look like a completely different person to me. I would perceive his hygene to be compromised and i know that had i have gained weight over what I was at when we met because I was already over weight for myself that he would have said something to me and that would have been ok. Our significant others have a rt to tell us when a physical or emotional change is making them think or feel differently as long as they do not relay the message in an abusive manner.
After my babies, I always worked out to Billy Blanks Tae Bo and allowed my babies to work out with me. Pull the videos up on you tube. He may get turned on seeing you work out and have a good time with your babies after work.
As far as making dinner rt when you get home, ask him to make dinner three nights a week so you and the babies can work out and spend a half hour to hoyr of quality time together. Tell him you heard him and you’d like to get healthy for you and him.
No fuck that!!! Yiu gave him a child!! he should appreciate every pound and stretch Mark you have!!! Personally I would kick him in his teeth. And brun all his food
he is a piece of shit sounds like you both are on rocky terms as it is. He should love you no matter what you look like. Divorce his ass, take time and heal and feel good about yourself. Once you are in the right place then the weight will come off or you will fine a real man that will love you curves and all. Stay Beautiful to yourself. You are one of a kind and you are beautiful inside and out even over 30 lbs or not. Stay true and good luck.
I’m sorry but I have a problem with this. You just had a baby not to long ago and ur weight really shouldnt be an issue. I am a bigger girl I actually lost weight while I was pregnant and gained it back and more after I had my daughter. My husband would never tell me I need to lose weight. He makes sure that i know how beautiful i am the way i am. I think u need to talk to him about this and how it makes you feel. If he doesnt change then I think it’s time for you to find someone else who will love you for u no matter what size you are.
Not breastfeeding will help a lot. I watched my best friend drop like 20 in a few weeks just from no longer breastfeeding. Water vs coffee if you’re an all day coffee drinker, snack on veggies or fruit instead of junk if you’re a junk food junkie (I am, I’ll be chubby forever) walk, a lot. With warmer weather coming )depending where you’re from) it’ll be a lot easier.
Also. You’re husband should stop being a twat.
He had no business saying that I’d be telling him to go to hell, you just had a baby don’t let him get to you and if he says anything else rude throw him in the trash and get a new one
It takes time to lose that baby weight that you gained, he should know that! He’s being an ass, just do the best you can do sweetie!
Unless your man is ripped and chiseled and every inch of his body is perfect then he needs to keep his mouth shut! I’ve been with my man 4 years. We have no kids together and I’ve gained 30 pounds. He’s never once said anything about me gaining weight. I have a mirror, I can clearly see I’ve gained weight. He definitely doesn’t need to remind me.
I don’t understand how he wouldn’t be attracted to you, because it seems like to me you more than deserve the Wonderwoman status. These men who must have so much above their expectations should lessen them because if we were to make it equal theres no way we would be attracted to them either. Its disgusting how a man doesn’t find you carrying life within you and being able to bring life into this world, work a full time job, come home, cook and cater to his needs and the babys needs not attractive, I mean, honey, tell him he can go kick rocks, because if you’re doing what YOU need to do to provide for him and for the baby, ask him if theres any way he can MOTIVATE you to go outside and go for a walk, instead of bringing you down saying hes not attracted to you. LADIES! Honestly! If you were to tell your man he’s gained a gut, what does it to him mentally? It breaks him down, right?! No different here! Especially with the world mainstreaming that its BETTER suited to look like a damn Victoria Secret model or one of those instagram body builders, the world is mainstreaming FAKE BEAUTY! Tell your man that if he wants to get his point across, MOTIVATE you and RESPECT you in a way that he would expect. I mean, damn, thats disrespectful as hell!!!
I gained 60 pounds with my spouse before baby was even conceived & he never quit telling me how sexy i am even while pregnant. You’re not the issue he is. You marry for better or worse & hes ready to tap out over a few pounds? Smh what a loser.
my husband & i have gained quite a bit of weight together since high school. partly from inactivity but mainly from eating bad. but neither of us would ever say to each other that we were unattracted to each other. hell i still have to yell at him sometimes because he will whistle at me in public or grab my butt & i’m more on the conservative side. we’re parents & no one wants to see that.
not to mention men don’t understand than women are in unattracted to bad attitudes, & when things are not good in a relationship the last thing we want is to sleep with them or be affectionate. you grew his child. that right there should make you the most attractive thing on the planet to him. & you’re his wife so his love for you should as well. you guys could try counseling & do separate sessions as well to see if that helps. but your husband is wrong for making you feel bad about yourself & he needs to know that.
Dont ever change your image for anyone other than yourself. He should be understanding and love you through it all. So what you still have some baby weight… you just pushed a watermelon through your hooha. You have better things to be worried about… and he should be helping you more with all of those things (cooking, cleaning, ect.)
I’m gonna be the bad guy here and bring up an important point…
Your husband has the right to not feel attracted to you. It happens. Especially if you’re carrying around 30 lb of baby weight.
As long as he wasn’t a dick about it and brought it up just as his feelings and not in a rude manner, then you have to take it as it is. Your husband communicated his feelings to you in a healthy, adult way.
At least he didn’t take his problem to strangers on the internet.
He is the one with issues ! Leave him. If he isn’t attracted to u and you resent him it won’t work anymore. Have u guys been having sex at all ?
Dont change yourself to please someone who is clearly too shallow to appreciate what he already has. make yourself happy, and go find you a man who will love you for you and not your pre baby body.
That’s not right that you are questioning what he said to you. So what if you haven’t lost all the weight what did he think babies come without changing our bodies. Tell him he’s got a small fucking brain and that you look stunning maybe even throw in his dick is okay but nothing special
He should be encouraging not saying stuff like that. I have said to mine how I don’t feel great cuz of there weight I have gained, it doesn’t bother him he always has something nice to say and make me feel better. Couple’s should build each other up
Suggest counseling for your husband! Also, you may want to give it another try with another therapist who you find more compatible.
I was married to my husband 47 years and at one time I needed to lose 300 lbs. He encouraged me to do well, but I was always beautiful to him.
Um you just had a baby not too long ago. He should be ashamed of himself.
You gaining 30 pounds is nothing… and not the problem ! He is the issue. If you love someone it doesn’t matter to them if you gain weight while carrying their child. I’ve known women that gained up to 60 pounds with a pregnancy and their husbands didn’t weight shame them! You just carried a child for 9 months and gave birth… to me he should be more sympathetic towards you .not rude!! I think he may have an issue himself.
Over 30 pounds… what about when a medical condition or treatment makes you lose your hair? What about age kissing you and wrinkles and silver hair shine threw? What about your children. … lord forbid they have a medical condition that makes them gain wait, lose their hair ect ect. Will your husband verbally abuse them? A man like that is no man to be with. If he was a keeper he would have said "hey honey let’s start taking walks at night, I’ve been thinking we need to est healthier, buy you a gym membership and tell you I’ll watch the kids this is so you can have some time to work on yourself, love you… see the difference?
You gained this weight from having his child. Him saying that is not ok at all. I would tell him right where to go.
Every single person alive has the right to be attracted or unattracted to someone. My husband and I keep each other in line with our weight it’s healthy to communicate.
Sorry to say this love, if he doesn’t fancy you, no matter how you look, he doesn’t fancy you.
your beautiful no matter your weight. Its your weight not your worth. He’s a major dickhead. You just have him one of the best gifts of life and he’s going to put you down instead of building you up. Please don’t over due/whelm your self. Being a mom is stressful enough. I can’t even believe there are men still like this. He should quite honestly hate himself. Pregnancy changes your body. I personally gain weight in places I never did before getting pregnant. 5 years ago everything went to my stomach, now I feel it’s now on my backside. I mean I am assuming he’s got himself since he wants to complain, maybe he should help by supporting and working out with you. SUPPORT goes a long way.
I think since he already communicated it to you this way now you 2 just have to move forward but I agree he went about it the wrong way. I gained almost 30 lbs when i quit smoking recently and my husband is supportive. At 1 point he told me, because i truly didn’t realize how big i was getting, that i was putting it on kind of fast but he always made sure to make me feel good about myself and never would tell me he’s not attracted to me. And yours is baby weight, not that it makes a huge difference they should always be supportive, but it’s because you had his kid. I mean in your relationship you should be able to tell the other how you feel but not at the expense of each other’s feelings.
Thank y’all for commenting. I just want to clarify a few things. My husband is a naturally thin person, and eats like a horse without gaining an ounce. He refuses to eat anything healthy that I cook, ie switching from ground beef to turkey etc. additionally, he only cooks when he feels like grilling something. I usually go without dinner, or eat what I fixed my baby. We’re from the south, so he doesn’t understand why I can’t eat Saturday morning breakfast lol. The workout regime is an issue for me, bc I can’t go to the gym before work as my commute is an hour and daycare isn’t open. I just looked up workouts online and starting doing them this week, with help from my child. I understand the people that are saying I should lose the weight, which I am trying to do. My husband did tell me in a nice way, actually he was crying when he told me. My problem is I can’t let it go, and bring it up all the time. This leads to a fight, in which I withdraw. I tried leaving for a month, and that didn’t work bc sadly we need each other’s incomes. That sounds bad I know, but I just wanted to explain further. He asked me this week why I’m suddenly working out. I don’t know why I have this resentment in my heart.
Words hurt and being married to my husband for 24 yrs who would use these kind of hurtful words and others comparing me to other women and not seeing the positive only negative about me made me hate him as well. I totally understand where you are coming from. He should not be negative and instead focus on the positive things. We choose to love our partners no matter what that’s what we promised when we got married. The good, the bad and the ugly we have to accept and support each other when we feel down. He should help you to come up with a plan for you both to be healthy and maybe plan meals and go grocery shopping with you to help you. He should be more helpful in the household chores and with the baby. Counseling may help if you find someone who makes you feel more at ease. Try to focus on the positive things about him and your marriage and talk to him about your feelings. But, the most import at thing I can tell you to do is to find a marriage group and also pray everyday and night for your husband and yourself. We forget God is all powerful and he doesn’t want your marriage to fail. My husband and I were headed down divorce road, but God has other plans. The devil wants to destroy your marriage, but only God can save it. Prayers for your healthy marriage.
It will only get worse. Leave!
He has issues…shallow as fuck and unappreciative to the fact you carried a baby! dont ever feel bad or feel like you should accept the way hes treating you. Thats bullshit. God I wish men could be the ones to get pregnant and see how it feels.
He was honest, maybe the words didn’t come out right. Maybe talk to him about how hurtful it felt. That could give him a chance to mend things. Not sure, just saying. Men and women don’t always speak the same “language.” I learned that the hard way.
No!! He’s actually being hard on you. Losing baby weight is hard! I hope he is at least being helpful with the baby. There are probably things that he doesn’t like about himself; he’s projecting on to you. As a couple you will go through ups and downs. You should try therapy again and maybe go alone this time. Suggest he goes and then try couples therapy. If you want to lose weight, do it for your health and happiness. Depending where you work, walk the stairs or walk during your breaks or lunch. Don’t try to change all your eating habits at once. Just start to transition into it. Drink lots of water! I understand because I only had two kids and was unhappy about my weight. I had a c-section with both. Even though I lost weight, I still have that annoying hanging apron. Oh! I recently bought a space saver rowing machine. A rowing machine is great for cardio and toning. It works your entire body. Plug in some music and row away and you’ll feel good just from the endorphins. Again, do it for you and don’t let him tear down your self-esteem!
Had a friend whose husband demanded she lost weight after giving birth twice in two years or he would divorce her. She deliberately packed on the pounds while he was away at sea. He was in the navy. Six months pass he comes home immediately files for divorce and heads back to base. She immediately begins a weight reduction program. Healthy diet, exercise, jogging, etc. Six months and it’s time to go back to court. She looks amazing. He no longer wants the divorce. She insisted it be finalized. Her reasoning for her behavior? If he can’t live me 30 pounds over weight then he won’t be around when age and gravity sets in. Not always going to have smooth soft skin and perky boobs.
Husband’s are supposed to love you no matter what. Rather you gain weight, loose weight, get sick, ECT. He doesn’t sound like a real man because if he was one then you gaining weight shouldn’t have an effect on him. He should love you regardless and for him to say that is BULLSHIT
I am sure he isn’t in the best of shape. Shame on him
If he doesnt love you for you, say GOODBYE.
You gained that weight so you could give him a healthy child. Not everyone can lose weight quickly.
I mean, on one side, at least he told you so you’re not wondering. But, on the other, it’s not like you gained that weight just because.
I don’t know. I’m kind of chubby and don’t really care about being super skinny so, if someone doesn’t like my weight, they can go else where.
Everything about this post and most of the comments is so sad. I feel so bad for all of you out there in these relationships and truly hope someday you get to experience true unconditional love. True love does discriminate against weight or looks.
He was honest with you. Would you rather he hide it and cheat? You can’t change how he feels and shouldn’t get mad at him for it. Fathers are impacted by the birth of a child to. Talk to him about it. Work on your body. Maybe it has to do with your attitude and not just your body
I would kick him to the curb he should be attracted to you no matter what…
A good man should love his woman no matter what! I could gain 100lbs stop shaving and combing my hair and my man would still love me. I know cause I got very sick and that all happened and he was still there telling me how beautiful I am. I bet you wouldnt make your man feel bad for differences in his looks through the years and he shouldnt do that to you either unless he wants to be punched in the throat
Did he say it in a mean way out of the blue or were you to talking about things and he told you in a nice way his feelings? If he told you kindly, you should not resent him. At least he is being honest with you instead of going out and cheating. And you can be in love with someone and not be attracted to them 24/7. Give marriage counseling another shot.
So sorry this is not ok for him to do that if hes a man at all. I gained weight but my husband doesnt say anything.
Love does not ask how much kg you are. It just does not.
Uh wow like WTF I’m sure he isn’t perfect, no one is, physically or mentally. That is just mean and not ok. No one deserves to be told that especially after having a baby. He should love you for who you are and love you for how you look. I’m sure he could do some changing too in some way. Don’t put up with that. He should be helping take care of the house, his child too and cooking. It’s a team effort.
Mine said to me that he missed how skinny I used to be. It did and does hurt my feelings but I guess that’s life. He’s definitely still attracted to me, but we have our times. We’ve been together for 17 years.