I felt so motivated today to get things done and to call this company to schedule an interview and my boyfriend is working close so he came home for lunchI got dressed today and did my hair and make up I made him a nice lunchI was so glad to see himAs I was hugging him bye he smelled a little like cigarettes. So I asked him if he smoked and he said no. I said are you sure. He said no. I knew he was lying. I just kept asking to see how many times he’d lie and he lied for like 10 times and then finally stopped answering. I’m so upset- not that he smoked that he continued to lie to my face. We have had this happen before with adderall. I’ve asked if he took adderall one morning on vacay after I asked him to leave it at home because it had been causing fights (him being super snappy) and I just wanted a relaxing getaway. He snapped at me so I was like this is his adderall behavior and same thing he kept saying no. It’s like I have to ask the question 10 times to get him nervous and know he’s lyingI don’t get itNow I’m just hurt and want to get back in my pajamas and go to bed On top of it, he got mad at me for being upset that I was continually lied to. My first thought is what else is he lying aboutHe has deleted texts with a female coworker He has been at a black lingerie lunch I found out about because we had our locations on (twin peaks but still) I try to be understanding and forgiving. He is new to tx and didn’t know what twin peaks was when his coworkers met there for lunch. He says he was afraid I’d get mad that he was talking to the female coworker because I have before (only because she was being too friendly) but I know he has to communicate with her and as long as he keeps it respectful on his end I’m good. So I’m not untrusting for no reason. And we’ve been talking about marriage and I’m honestly just second guessing it because I don’t want to be with someone who lies and hides things. Might seem minor to some people or a big deal to others idk. But Does it seem like I’m over reacting or reasonably hurt and angry?
I remember the post about Adderall and I’m just gonna say nobody’s gonna be on you’re side anymore this time then last time. Stop trying to control your man. “But he’s lying” yeah I would lie too if you’re gonna make a huge deal out of every way the man tries to relax. Prescribed medication is a NEED you’re not a Dr if he didn’t like the side effects he can take that up with his Dr. Cigarettes are an addictive thing but can be very helpful to smokers to help with anxiety and whatnot. Instead of constantly attacking everything he does for himself why not help him find a way to unwind that you won’t throw a fit over. Or better yet if you’re this distraught by everything he does then go find a more suitable partner because you sound exhausting to me.
Yeah, you definitely need to find a partner you like and enjoy being around.
Your behavior is controlling, and if the roles were reversed, any woman would be advised to leave a man who acts how you do.
Maybe seek counseling to work out your issues, instead of trying to change and control a partner.
Unless you actually find the cigarettes then I wouldn’t push the issue much. People can smell like cigarettes if they’re hanging around the smokers. Believe me. I don’t smoke, but if I hang around my family at a bbq (chain smokers) I will come home smelling like smoke.
I remember you posting before. Honestly your man probably just needs a breather. Calm down and try to go an entire dayyyy and night. Without getting on his ass about something. I don’t trust the talking to the female either but I’m just gonna be honest. Guys that feel tapped and controlled and walking on eggshells usually want and potentially even need an outlet that is not their woman harping on them 24/7. He probably talks to the girl. Not to cheat. But just to have normal friendly conversations with someone who isn’t trying to get him caught in a lie constantly. I’m not trying to be mean. We’ve all been in relationships where we could have done better. I’m just saying. Lay off of him or don’t be surprised he’s finding other people to talk to or vent to or even just have a decent non cheating time with
Over reacting. “Black lingerie lunch” at Twin Peaks lol come on now… they do that I’m pretty sure weekly on a certain day for their “theme” at every location. It’s a public restaurant not a strip club or wild party. Calm down. You can not constantly Hound him…you’ll drive yourself and him crazy. If you truly don’t trust him, maybe look into counseling or take a hard look at ending the relationship. You can’t have anything good without trust.
He lied to you because of the way your reacting. He shouldn’t feel the need to lie. Maybe lay back a little. Otherwise he will give up and leave you. Talk to him and maybe be a little understanding.
There’s two separate issues here. 1. The person you want to be with isn’t the person you’re with, and you aren’t seeing this. You want someone who is honest, who isn’t smoking, who is upfront and doesn’t want to go to places you also aren’t comfortable with, and isn’t using Adderall. But that’s not who he is.
2. He’s lying. Whether he is ashamed of his choices or trying to avoid arguing with you, this is toxic. He needs to be honest and upfront with his decisions and clear that they’re his choices not yours. Then if you don’t feel you’re compatible because of these choices, whatever they are, you can make a choice to end the relationship. Instead he is lying and hiding the things you don’t like that he does so that you will continue to be happy with him and therefore continue the relationship.
I don’t think you’re trying to be controlling or he is necessarily terrible for doing these things, but basically you guys want different things/have different values and he is trying to make it look like he wants the same things so that you’ll continue the relationship.
It sounds a bit like fatal attraction
Have you had trust issues with people you have dated in the past? Honestly you sound like you are being controlling and suffocating. You’re his partner not his mom. My husband and I are completely equal to one another. We understand that we don’t think the same things or like the same things. We discuss issues and ultimately it’s ourselves that make our own decisions. Nagging gets you nowhere. But I do know that when someone nags at me I do exactly what they don’t want because it’s my life and my choice. And if you feel you have to check his location you need to move on.
Maybe he snapped bc you asked him 10 times like he was a child. Cigarette smoke lingers. I don’t smoke but if I’m anywhere where someone is, it sticks and I stink.
You are too damn much. You really tried to tell him not to take his medication? And news flash, people can smell like smoke from being around others that smoke. My bf smokes and I don’t, but my clothes usually smell like it because of him. Get over yourself. Grow tf up.
Feeling are valid
But you are acting a little to crazy about the smoking part
I don’t see why he can’t he’s a grown man 
Sounds like your the problem. I would snap to if someone asked me several times especially if Ik I didn’t do something. He’s an adult not a child. I’m not a smoker but when around people who are I have smelt like it. And no one should stop taking a prescribed medicine to suit their partner if there is a problem with his meds HE needs to address it with his doctor. I hope this man wakes up and sees someone is trying to control him and gets out.
You sound super controlling
Comes off as controlling. He’s an adult, he can smoke if he wants to. The other issues are separate from this incident that you caused. If he feels like he has to hide smoking from you, makes me wonder what else you knitpick him over.
You can meet in the middle. Gift him a vape so he doesn’t have to smell like cigarettes and can still decompress 
Your controlling behavior is insane. You sound petty. You sound immature. You need to get a life and grow up.
Not for face book keep your personal business to your self!
Folk like you turn people to fags and drink jeez thankfully you ain’t my gf
What does the first sentence mean? Did you use smelling cigarettes as a reason to not call about an interview and get things done?
It’s sounds like you’re trying to “mom” him.
It could be that he was standing next to someone or was in someone’s car that was smoking. As a non smoker it smells way worse. Next time smell his hand if you’re that worried. 
But honestly he’s a grown ass man and if he wants a cigarette he’s going to have one.
As a former smoker I feel like it’s such a small thing to fight about. I know it’s unhealthy but are you going to ride his ass about hamburgers and chips too?
That’s my two cents.
Also if my man was going to ridicule me for having one cigarette I’d probably lie too. Not to be untruthful but to save ourselves from a petty ass fight.
I would seek therapy for your controlling behavior.
Maybe he was at the strip club or bar
I agree with some people one person that you probably hiding the cigarette smell but you know he could be around people that smoke and it does get on clothes too second hand my parents smoked had people over and I had somebody asked me in school do I smoke and I was only 14 so like somebody said unless you have evidence he’s smoking I would back off if you don’t trust them you need to leave
Asking questions all the time and get angry will make anyone start lying. Stop asking questions. You sound immature and probably have controlling issues. Live life without stress will do wonders
You sound like a parent not a partner.
He needs to get away from you asap. You’re controlling plain and simple. You’re trying to control what he’s allowed or not allowed to do.
I guarantee it if this post was from a man saying all this about his woman everyone would tell her to leave him cause of his controlling ways.
What if he wouldn’t let you wear makeup??
Yeah. He better not marry you.