Unless your papers say otherwise baby daddy can let your child meet whoever whenever.
Do you introduce everyone of your friends to him before allowing them around your child? When he has the kid, itās up to him who he has around. As long as that person isnāt a risk, and not left alone with the little one. I Honestly donāt see an issue.
You have every right to know whoās going to be around your child.
With so many SOs hurting & killing their bf/gf kids you have a right to be concerned & know whoās around your kids.
Are visits ordered through court? If not withhold the child until he petitions for rights. If/when he does or if they are ordered you need to put in the agreement that you meet any friends, SOs, etc that he will be having around your child. Add that a criminal check through the court or police station will be done on each person & that you both have to approve of that person. Also put in first right of denial. It means that if you or he canāt care for the child they have to contact the other parent first. Basically he canāt take the child for āparenting timeā & not be the 1 parenting.
Funny how his judgement is in question when you break up.
Unfortunately you can not dictate whoās around your kid on parenting time unless you have it in a court order. Just like he canāt dictate whoās around the child when you have the child . Goodluck.
You are both equal parents thatās true butā¦ā¦ I would dig around and find out what the person she actually isā¦ good or bad
Let your child grow and realize the kind of person their father is on their own
As long as your kid isnāt in danger or being neglected then just live your life and let them decide who their dad is as they grow up
My ex and I have that agreement with our children. We both want whatās best for them and to know who is around them. Itās not in writing but weāre both adamant about it. Even though we live states away we always discuss and even if itās not in person we agreed to a virtual meet before the children get involved. It hasnāt happened yet but itās been discussed and I agree with you 100%. I wouldnāt say confront him but definitely bring it up in discussion again civilly.
While I do get where you are coming from, and I understand your concerns, you cant tell the other parent who they have in their lives and when. Most likely a judge will tell you the same. If anything, you can try an get your concerns out to him and maybe even talk to the chick, but if they wonāt do it then unfortunately there isnāt anything you can legally do and keeping the child from the father isnāt a good solutionā¦
Iām still with the father of my children but if I was not I would definitely want to know who the hell is around my children. I donāt trust anyone but close family. Go that extra mile for your childās safety, you are their mother, their protector.
Courts wouldnāt side with you on this. Opinions on dating post seperation are varied. Denying visitation is only deemed acceptable in severe cases like when the safety of the child is at stake. Otherwise you have to bring it before the court and try to sort it out.
You can try to get a clause about facing added to your court order if he makes it a habit to bring new people into his life frequently. But qheat ever clause would be approved would most likely apply to both parties and could carry fines at the very least if violated.
It sucks that heās not trying to make it easy on everyone, especially the child. The child does need to be eased into new relationships. I agree with you there.
But the reality is that he doesnāt have to. And that can be hard to swallow.
And Iād hate for you to get I trouble trying to withhold visitation when thatās not technically a good enough reason to.
I donāt see any harm in you meeting them. They are going to be a big part of your childās life
Your not allowed and itās control. People need to back off. And realize that itās his time both yāallās child. Unless child is in harm signs of harm etc. You need to let him have time with his other parent.
You within your right to know the person whose around your son it is your business my grandkids suffered because of my ex-son in law so call common law wife your trying to be civil about this not nosey jbeing protective within your right and your sonās best interest
You have every right to know whose around your kiddo
As much as it sucks there is nothing you can do about it. He can have whoever he wants around your son as long as no harm is being done. I get where you are coming from though.
While it would be nice for him to respect what you ask and work with you he doesnāt have to. When itās his time unless this person is a danger to your child you really donāt have a say in who he brings around. He doesnāt have to introduce her to you. If you trust him to take care of your son you should trust what he does. You could try to keep the child from him but thatās a bit extreme. You could also go to court and try to get a judge to agree no new significant others around for both for a certain time period. But after that time period you canāt stop him. Iām not even sure I judge would do that, some might but some wonāt. I do understand you wanting to meet her any everything itās just unfortunately not what he wants to do.
Myself AND Dr. Phil would agreeā¦
Why let your child get attached to someone who is going to leaveā¦?
Unfortunately thereās nothing you can do. My ex met a chick at a bar while I was home raising our daughter and brought her around our daughter probably immediately like it was no big deal. She could be a drug addict or whatever and thereās nothing you can do as a parent. Just supposed to trust the other person and hope for the best. Good luck.
Itās non of you business, unless thereās evidence of abuse you donāt have a say
Honestly you gotta put some faith in your exā¦I know thatās hard because they let you down but they havenāt let down your child. My ex and I havenāt been together for I while and Iāve been with my husband for 3 years. You have to trust his judgment and let him be a parent. If you donāt think hes gonna put him in danger then donāt worry about it. You want to know if your kids will bond with the other person long before you get serious. That doesnāt mean a new man or woman every week by no means but after a month or soā¦I donāt see the harm in meeting new āfriendsā
Just let it go. You can make requests but you cannot control what he decides to do.
The thing is, even with a court order you cannot control who the other parent has around the kids. What they do and who they have around on their time is out of your control, unfortunately.
He may be wrong, but when at dads visitation you canāt control it. If the courts are concerned it can be supervised visitation
Honestly. Thatās what my ex said too.
He didnāt want āall my boyfriendsā around our son.
Turns out, the guy that Iāve introduced to my son, (the only guy I started dating after my ex) is now my husband and we share a child together. While he has introduced 2 of his girlfriends to our son. Heās with neither of them
I havenāt said anything.
You do not get to choose or know who your kid is around on the other parents time. While yes, itās normal to want to, you still donāt get to.
Unfortunately you donāt have much of a say who your ex brings around your kid unless they are a sex offender or a drug addict or something. I had five boys with my ex husband. He cheated on me constantly. One of the girls he cheated on me with was around my boys immediately after we separated. However it didnāt last. He had a new girlfriend pretty much every month. As my boys got older we used to laugh about it, saying we donāt even remember their names anymore because they wouldnāt be around long enough. Try not to let it bother you and be the role model you want your children to see in regards to relationships. I only brought one guy around my kids and now heās my husband.
I hate when people wanna say āunless the kids in danger itās none of your businessā well how the hell would she know if heās in danger or not if she hasnāt met the girlfriend. It may be his time but he could be courteous to the mother of his child because Iām sure if it was the other way around he would have an issue with it.
I would just let him know that you know but donāt donāt put your emotions in it. You both need to build a trusting coparenting relationship for your son. I would also ask to meet the woman, but have the expectation that it may not happen.
In my opinion
To just let it be
You do have every right to be concerned or mad
But the minute she or he gives you a reason to be concerned then put your foot down
You have every right to meet the person whoās going to be in your sonās life, and absolutely correct not wanting your son around a " Random fling" ECT.
I agree you should know who is around your child and meet them ā¦sadly I dont think you have any say when theyāre with your ex unless your child is in danger
Not your business what happens on his time is his time your time is your time. If u see a judge they will tell u the same thing. You are not in control anymore. Going through a battle right now with my husbands ex who has ran and hid with his kids all because he moved on and she was not happy about it even though she moved on ummm with I think this is her 4th guy (yes brought around the kids) along with dating 2 at the same time brining kids around both. She was Refusing visits, refusing talks, refusing any type of relationship with his kids all because he wouldnāt listen to bitter baby momma on who he could and could not date who she wanted and donāt want around their kids. Now fast forward, court coming up she facing losing them for abducting and alienating him. All because she didnāt want him to move on.
Example
As long as she is there your not seeing them
As long as your with her, over my dead Body will u be with them,
She is not driving you to see them
She can not take u anywhere to be with them
They can not talk as long as ur together we will never have a relationship( well duh)
Might I add SHE HAS NEVER MET ME, we offered she REFUSED! She has done nothing but degraded my children and I from the moment she found out about me. sent me nasty messages, old naked photos of my now husband.
I can show you hundreds of messages, threats her keeping them away. You canāt do that it is not right ! Not your place ! He should say the same about who u date! If there is a issue see a judge. Not FB! Not hold a child as a pawn because your not in control of who he is with. It is a part of life !
If you have full custody than fuck him and his whores. He kicked you and a little boy out, heās scum.
Itās totally normal and expected to want to know who is around your kid and to want him to only introduce serious partners to your child as you are right it is hard on the kids to be constantly meeting and getting attached to new people that then leave. but ultimately in a situation like this you unfortunately donāt have any say into who he has the kid around or introduces them to while the kid is with him unless thereās an actual safety/neglect issue.
You are within reason. Iād confront him & tell him you know. The one thing my kids told me was they hated it when my x husband was questioning them if I was seeing someone. Leave the kid out of it. If necessary & you have the info call her, explain who you are & that youād like to meet in a public place for coffee & explain your concerns. If sheās a good woman she will understand your concerns & get her viewpoint on things only concerning your child. If he is not willing to give you some info like her name then tell him if he has a date with so & so bring your kid home. Donāt make this kid part of a half assed relationship. If she seems like she cares about your child then breath a little bit easier, but he/she should always be both of yours biggest priority.
Unless itās court ordered he can have his child around anyone he wants.
You can ask the courts to put it in order that neither parent is to have new partners around the child until the relationship has been established for more than (up to) 6 months. But there has to be a pattern of multiple short or unstable relationships in which your child has been subjected to. (I have it in my child custody order)
My ex husband has our 4 year old talk to his gf from the Philippines. Pisses me off, but thereās literally nothing I can do. Now, if she hurts my kid then thatās a different story.
Honestly, let it go, itās out of your control, and stressing about it, will just bring you down, if you have safety concerns, then by all means, go via court to keep your baby safe.
Take him to court and make a custody agreement,in the agreement have it state neither of you can have people around your child (ren) without the other knowing and meeting that person .me and my SO are together but have an agreement in place and it states that and if one breaks the agreement even in that way the other can go for full custody,it isnāt about being bitter ,itās about wanting to know who is around your child for your childās health and safety in every aspect !
You do have a right to know, heās a minor child and no court will allow him to have parenting without knowing who all lives in the home (been there done that) especially if he works and the child must stay with his or her partner during that time. Seek a parenting order, mediation or whatever it takes to make sure you know your son is in good hands during his parenting time. My ex would pick up our child and then the gf was left to take care of her kids and mine while he wasnāt even home and traveled for work, long story short I requested a full blown custody evaluation & they found him to be the secondary parent in his own homeā¦ therefore the court admonished him and told him that he could not have parenting if he had to leave for work during his parenting time. You have to know who is with your child as there are sex offenders every where, men or womenā¦. Yāall never know so the childās safety comes first!
I appreciate this sentiment so much, as itās my situationā¦ unless clearly defined in the court order, we can do nothing. Take him to court if you have a gut check to question his ability to keep your child safe.
You canāt legally tell your ex who can and canāt be around your kid. No judge will rule in your favor on that unless the person poses a real danger to your kid and you can prove it.
He kicked you & his own child out?? You didnāt say if you were married. I would probably limit his visitation if their is no court order. If he cared so much about the child, you wouldnāt have been kicked out.
Confront him about it or just drop by and check on your boy.
You can be his stability. His safe place where there arenāt people in and out of his life. Keep your home stable. But the more you try to control what dad does on dadās time the crazier it will make you.
go to court, get a parenting arrangement, put that stipulation in for both parties