Soooooo many know it alls. Not one of you have a clue what is really going on. You speculate only. ASK HIM why he doesn’t pay. Then, discuss how you want the whole relationship to go and change how things are done.
In the end, he is not worth it.
Dont keep wasting your time, effort, energy or money for him to eventually get back with his child mother.
Girl run as fast as you can he is too old, he is still with his wife, he is lying about everything, he doesn’t live at his moms that’s a cover up story. No more dates don’t pay for anything else you’re too young to be his sugar mama if he can’t take care of two women he is doing too much and needs to sit tf down.
His “ex wife” probably gets his whole check still
Sounds like a winner . Not
You’re being taken advantage of. If it were me, I would cut him loose.
dump this free loader who is old enough to b your dad! u deserve better!
Leave his broke ass alone
Are there any MEN on here that could tell her from a MAN’S perspective??? Please drop that laser and go enjoy your life sis… you are too young for this
Run Forest Run
That man is playing you. First, it’s NOT a good idea to date anyone whose still married, secondly you are leading with your purse and that’s a no - no.
Girrrrrllll go get you someone your age and that’s doing things in life and can match your purse or do more.
Yes ma’am you have got to get away from that dude. I’m all for paying from time to time but honestly NO man let’s me !!! You’re going to wish you had walked away now if you don’t babe. Maybe you telling him what’s up and being done will make him show some initiative to pay. If not you should for sure run babe !! He’s a grown ass man. I’m a single mom. Two kids. No help and I can still afford to take us out to eat at least once a week as a treat if I wanted to
He is so using you don’t be a fool out here
If your too embarrassed to ask him then he’s not the one for you, you should be comfortable to talk about anything, if you don’t invite him on anymore dates & wait for him to ask you. That will show you his level of interest. Carry on with your plans without him so he knows your not hanging around for him, he will either plead the poor me card which is a giant red flag
Run. He can use his debit card to pay for stuff. He might still be with his wife and doesn’t want to leave paper trail. Get someone who value you.
Stepped on. Girl tell his ass goodbye
If he’s 37 and can’t pay his own way, that’s a red flag.
Are you even sure he’s separated? Sounds like he can’t spend money because his wife will find out.
He’s using you… get out now!
Douchebag alert! RUN GIRL!!
Try asking his wife about it!
Have a walk in the park with board game night instead
Dating no should be 50/50 most of the time. I would have a talk with him. That’s not how it should be. It sounds like he is taking advantage. When they ask how to split the bill, and he doesn’t respond, just say two please. That way he is responsible for his own and it’s not on you. I’m f he can’t pay for it he shouldn’t of ordered it. That’s on him. I would walk away because that’s is giving red flags as to how the relationship will pan out…. One sided.
Stop spending money cause you have financial goals or whatever, see if he sticks around?
Nah at 37 he should def have his shit together . Or atleast be able to be honest with u about his financial situation.
He ain’t trying to leave a trail
Do the same have dinner and leave before the bill comes.
He’s a rat.
Leave for sure, it won’t get better
That’s shitty and suspicious to me. I would be so turned off by that. I’d definitely say that’s weird and not ok.
And he does not have a bank card? Dont be stupid-he does not wanna pay…
Talk to him. He might not have enough and be to embarrassed to say anything
He is still married …RUN
Separated means…he still has a wife!!
Nobody is that broke. There is something more going on. Sure sometimes things are hard and you just can’t but for months and he can’t chip in then he doesn’t want to invest in you! Move on
He’s 37 and doesn’t ever have $. Somethings off. Straight up ask him. He may be going thru a rough time. But if that’s the case shouldn’t be dating someone if you’ve got nothing to offer. Not a date. Not a potluck donation. Not a coffee? Think your giving too much too early. On to the next one… your falling into a habit now.
Everything should be equal
If your paying for everything now, believe me when I tell you that you will pay for everything from here on out as well. Girl you better drop that SCRUB and go find you a real MAN! That’s probably why he’s getting a divorce because his broke ass won’t contribute, does he even really have a job?
Do yourself a huge favor and move on and find someone who will make an effort to at least pay for 1/2 of the cost of a date night. He sounds Bougee!
There is a saying “my money is mine and yours is mine” think about it.
How about having a talk about it with HIM!?
Tell him how you feel, tell him you have the feeling of being taken advantage of. Talk to him about your wishes and ask him how he feels about it.
If you want to have an adult realtionship - behave like one.
No one here can tell you how to feel or why he does that…
All the best
Move on honey… He’s training u. You’ve only been dating for a couple months now n you are showing him that you’re willing to take care of hin… Why dont he have cash if he’s working too?? My question is he’s moved out, but do u knw where he’s moved to? Have u ever been to his home, or seen how he’s living?? I dont know, but its giving me a “drug addict vibe, or living with someone else” vibe… That maybe why he never has $… Either way he’s gonna expect you to flip the bill eveytime cause you’ve made that a habit now… But u already knw and have a feeling shit aint right, cause u wouldnt be here asking for advice… Half these women on here has been there/done that including me… MOVE ON BEFORE YOU GET IN TOO DEEP
Red flags&no you;aren’t being. Insensitive it’s;nice to be taken out on date’s. Without covering;all expenses. I remember;with my belated mom for example. If there’s;a ladies lunch everybody’s paying for themselves. He’s trying;to avoid leaving behind a digital or paper trail.
This was exactly my situation… we date almost a year n I could count on 1 hand how many times he paid. Doesn’t sound like he will start helping out anytime soon. As much as it may hurt but you have to dump him, plus he’s not divorced he may juss b lookin for someone to ‘take care’ of him.
I’m not going to be hard on you because you’re still young. But he is playing you honey. He saw that you’re willing to pull out of your pocket, so if you continue to date him, that’s how it will be. Then the next thing you know, he will be “borrowing” money from you that you will never get back. Cut your losses and move on. Besides this man isn’t divorced and for all you know, he’s lying to you about being separated from his wife. You’re too damn young to get caught up in some drama like this.
Two words: sneaky link
You’re not dating a man, you’re dating a dependant
How are you overspending if you said, you either invited him out you said it was fine he didn’t have cash and you paid. That was your choice. You keep going out with him or asking him out so it’s your choice to keep going out with him knowing he won’t have money on hand. Why are you going to leave him, like people are saying, if obviously you like paying. You do it. Over and over. Did you ever think of telling him how you would like the relationship to go? For you both to share paying for dates or for him to pay for everything if that’s what you want. I don’t get why the question is Ake here instead of tío the guy you are having the issue with. also what does the kid have to do with it? There was no reason to bring the kids into it.
Move on he’s not worth it
Sounds like a douche to me ,also sounds like he doesn’t want to leave a trail… id leave his arse !!
Tell him to pay half at least me m my man jus go 50/50 shit I would’ve said something like the 3rd time it happened. He’s just going to expect you to do it unless you make him responsible
Some of y’all responses trippin. That’s why relationships don’t work no more. Y’all so negative allll the d***M time y’all don’t wanna try for nobody it’s always just leave or run or putting the man down. Unless you know the full story negativity is not valid.
Stop paying his way. If he works then it should at bear minimum be 50/50. With him contributing to paying for the dates/events!!! If he never pays that’s a huge red flag
Oh no sweetheart you’re dating a hobosexual. Someone who’s dating someone to have a place to stay and feed him. Girl stay away! 37 and unashamed. His mom raised someone with a future
You are being played like a fiddle! That boy is not separated from his wife no matter what he tells you. “I don’t have cash on hand” translates to “I can’t explain to my wife where my money is going if I pay”.
If you are that broke, then you don’t need to be dating. Or he could cook you dinner at home. But first the big elephant in the room is he is still MARRIED. Second you are his cash cow. He needs to get his chit together.
Ask him what’s up. If he can’t answer or things don’t change. Go unless your ready to take can of a man child… personally my household my husband told me he would prefer I deal with the bills and money. Am I great? Nope - but I do it… and when I have money and he doesnt… and vice versa… we split it.
He is using you better move on
go on dates that dont cost money… then youll know
He still has a wife…shld be your first reason to not be with him. Regardless if they are separated.
He doesn’t view yall as dating…he views yall as friends. Your inviting him places not him inviting you
Girl he’s prolly still married and can’t spend money on u because his wife controls finances, just my opinion
Me not even making it past the first line
He does not want to use his bank card because his wife will see. He is not separated… Get out girl!
And he’s walking??? What 37 year old divorced parent doesn’t have a car?
Ya I’d leave him where u found him
If you don’t drop him and quickly
Go and find someone your age will spend on you he’s split up for a reason if you talk to his wife that’s probably the reason they have split in the first place
Tell him it’s his turn to start paying. Sounds like a sponge to
Lmfao he’s not divorcing
Makes you wonder why the marriage isn’t working for one. Two he isn’t completely divorced, how long have they been separated? Are divorce papers filed? And at 37 , never having any extra money even to cover his own way … not cool.
Run. You’re his sugar mama.
Ask him about it. Have a serious talk and let him know u are bothered by it.
For 23 you should be spending on YOU not a 37 grown azz MANBABY “idont have cash on hand” MY AZZ. Your just not worth him spending money on thats it
Say something! Ask about his financial situation, maybe he’s not being forthcoming due to embarrassment. I like being able to pay my own way when my bf of a year and I go out, but some times I can’t afford “extras” that week and he always has my back and vice versa. And you know, not every date has to be about spending money, if you care about one another simply taking a walk and having deep conversations can mean the world. I like going out every now and then, but I’d much rather be snuggled up in his arms watching goofy TV shows or movies eating snacks, escaping the world with him. Those are the moments that mean the most to me.
Get out when you can.
Effort should be reciprocated. From the sounds of it you are the one who’s making all the effort by inviting him places and then also flipping the bill. If you’re OK with how things r now, stay. If not leave. He will not change and things will probably get worse.
Girl…he hasn’t broken up with his wife and he using you for a free ride. Seen this sooooooo so many tines. He’s taking advantage of you
Do not pay for anyone! Find someone your age
Run!!! Far far away
Move on nothing wrong with paying for a meal for your guys but he should offer and the next time he should pay I’m all for paying but not all the time and when you first meet and are dating he should want to pay. Something is off it’s either he has no money at all or has a shared account with wife and he does not want her to see what he is spending money on just seems weird.
Too many red flags. Run girl!!!
Tell him bye Felicia because he’s playing you girlfriend!! He’s definitely not leaving his wife when he’s having his cake and eating it too!! You’re welcome!
Run and if you feel generous gift to the charity of your choice not him He is laughing at you Confront him when you’re out eating if he says he doesn’t have cash tell him his card is also acceptable
GIRL KICK HIM TO THE KURB.
You are wasting your time…he is taking advantage of you
Geet a new man. If they’re trash after 35 there’s no fixing them
What are u thinking ? He’s 37 for crying out loud !!! Ur still so young ur missing out on so much !!! And in NO way should I be feeding him !!! Ur just a meal ticket girl !!!
He is still with his wife and can’t pay for anything or he’ll get busted. RUN!!!
You knew the answer. It’s ok to pay sometimes but he never does come on and if he doesn’t have cash he doesn’t have no cards. By now I would of said something to him well they take cards too we not in 1900 where was only cash lol
Sounds to me like he is taking advantage. Now it should be you that doesn’t have any cash
What the hell you waiting for girl to run and get out of that relationship… he’s using you girl!! And please don’t say I’m not a cold hearted person… that’s just out the window now a days ok!! Kick him to the Curb mama ! He’ll go back to his X TRUST ME
Clearly you already know this isn’t right so stop it now. Nothing is gonna change, he’s using you, plain and simple. Find someone your own age
Alexa play no scrubs by TLC
Definitely need to run. He is definitely taking you for granted. If he wanted you for real he would have stepped up
Chile your dating yourself
Unless what you are doing now is what you want from a relationship, you need to leave. You have shown him that you will allow this to be your forever.
Why do you think hes not with his wife maybe she’s tired of psy for him too. Open your eyes.
He’s taking advantage of you …get out now while you can!
Please leave that loser and don’t waste your time. If he can’t afford to date he needs to stay home
Your nuts! He’s taking advantage of you and using you. He has no money at all, get rid of him and find somebody worth while.
He’s using you. And you’re letting him. Leave him alone…
Girl you better run!!! He sounds like he’s using you
Do not keep dating this guy! Red flags everywhere!!!
It’s because it will look pretty bad if he’s spending marital assets on a girlfriend
You should move on
If he cheating on his wife with you ,he is gonna cheat on you. You better run while you can. He is a user.
RUN!!! He is throwing every RED FLAG at you!!! RUNNNNNN
I would say the divorce is playing a big role in this but is probably not something you really want to deal with.