Is it normal to develop feelings for your children's teacher?

Because some people seem to think it's not normal and are now acting in a way that could be classed as discrimination, and I feel like such an invalid person I thought it was normal to get feelings no matter who it was I care for this teacher so much its unbelievable my feelings are very strong and after 2 years they just won't go away and the higher up teachers are treating me like I'm some sort of not normal person and judging me, I haven't done anything wrong to the teacher in anyway shape or form in an inappropriate way all I did was say how I felt because I was struggling with keeping it in and I shouldn't have said anything at all, I told them this 2 years ago and 2 years later still been treated like some sort of not normal person, my friends advised that I should get legal advice because of what they are doing can be classed as discrimination, I just don't know what the best thing to do is
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Is this person already married?

I need more information to understand the dynamics at play hereā€¦

  • do you work at the school?
  • what circumstances lead to you developing feelings?
  • who did you tell about these feelings?
  • If it was someone other than the teacher that you discussed this with: why?
  • how does everyone know that you have/had feelings for the teacher?
  • what is the discrimination that you feel like you are experiencing?

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Is it normal to develop feelings for your children's teacher? - Mamas Uncut

Sounds like you need to develop healthy boundaries.

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Who is doing what? :thinking: Unless someone is physically harming you or is making you feel threatened, there really is nothing you can do other than ignore it.

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I mean, you canā€™t help who you develop feelings for but Iā€™d stay away from my kids teachers

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Not discrimination unless it goes towards your sexual orientation or other protected statusā€¦not just cause you have feelings. But 2 years and people still go on about itā€¦probably means you still go on about it. You need to set some boundries. Work is work,home is home

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Iā€™m so confused, discriminatoryā€¦how? You told this person how you feel two years ago, are yā€™all dating? They brush it off? Because if you told them & thereā€™s nothing between yā€™all, obviously they donā€™t wanna be involved with you like that. Back off & leave it alone. :woozy_face::woozy_face::woozy_face:

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While the point is in the post, the needing to get legal advice is throwing me offā€¦. What exactly is going on? I feel as if half the story is missing. You donā€™t just get ā€œlegal adviceā€ for having feelings for someone and being treated differentlyā€¦. Do you have stalker tendencies?? Itā€™s been two yearsā€¦ idk

Super confusing.

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Did anyone else read this post at least ten times and still not understand what exactly tf is happening? :woman_shrugging:

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I feel u must of had more conversations with the teacher then just speaking about ur kidsā€¦ as idk about you. But the only times I need to speak to my kids teachers are when I have a question or they want to speak to me or In Parenting eveningsā€¦ I dont know anything about them or anything to get feel that way forwards themšŸ¤·ā€ā™€ļø

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Like one sided feelings or both yā€™all have feelings?

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i think you need to avoid the teacher and youā€™ll get over it

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I think what the person I saying that other people at her work are being funny with her or towards her because she had feelings for this said teacher and she feels they are all funny with her about it well thatā€™s how I read itā€¦

Maybe talk to them and say its been a few years now Iā€™m guessing your not with this said person and say nothing had happend and I would still like to get on with everyone and explain their making you feel upset

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This sounds stalkerish

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Your post is too confusing.

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You canā€™t help who you catch feelings for, probably should of thought how the situation might affect your kids before you said anything.

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This sounds a bit off. We cannot validate what you are saying without more details. Like what did you say? What exactly have they done to make you feel like you are being treated poorly?

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Ok it seems like some more info needs to be given to give advise hereā€¦ Are you married? Is the teacher married? And if you told the teacher how you feel, what was their reply to you?? Do you 2 have a history together??.. The answers to these questions make a big difference in anyone giving good advice. If the teacher didnā€™t seem interested and told the others about you, I think your answer is right there and you need to just back away. As far as legal advice, why? Have you been threatened?? So many unanswered questions hereā€¦:thinking:

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Oh my gosh really???

Ok so every year the teachers leave little bits of info for the new teacehrs could be a simple paragraph could be more on each student. Some teachers wonā€™t read these until Oct Nov to get a personal feel and nonbiased opinion on the student. I would bet that teacher put it info in the students file.
Go to your schools office and request a copy of their entire file. DO not tell them why. Go through it at home and then go from there. If you find anywhere in the file about that situstiom Im pretty sure you can have that removed from the file with one to one visit with the principal.

I was able to get a full copy of the records when i requested them it took some time but they canā€™t not deny you that .

My sons file had personal information about my health that was told in confidence about why he was absent from school. I was not tobe shared ina file with the next 8 years of school teachers. My 1 yr of terrible health issues is no ones business but that teacher made it a point to over react.

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I dont know what is going on?! Are you dating said teacher and people being hateful or did the teacher say no and you became a stalker and borderline heading to jail?

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I get a crazy vibe. You arent stalking or blowing this teacher (who youā€™re not with) up are you? :sweat_smile:. Like did yā€™all date or something happen? Not enough info given

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I donā€™t understand?! You have feelings for your kids teacher for 2 years, you told him but he wasnā€™t interested? Or have you developed some sort of relationship in which case itā€™s him that needs the legal advice because thatā€™s not allowed. Iā€™m quite confused as to what you actually want from this post tbh?!

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I read this post three times and have no clue what is going onā€¦ I feel half the story is missing. You canā€™t seek advice if you arenā€™t being completely honest.

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I wouldnā€™t be filing for any discrimination suit, unfortunately you have a reputation now with the school, and and theyā€™re setting boundaries to protect themselves

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Why do they know that you have feelings for the teacher?

Thatā€™s what happens when u tell people your business

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Discrimination- we cannot say anything to that as if it is or not without knowing what they are doing that you think might be discrimination.

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So much missing information here!

You came clean about your feelings and still acting the same way 2 years later?

Thats a little stalker if you ask me. 2 years later you need to move on and let it be.

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I really hope your child is not with the same teacher after 2 years. Sounds like you went to far with telling the teacher about your feelings and now she/he is giving others a heads up about you. Leave the teacher alone and move on before your child is affected by this

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So you are a teacher also then or do you work at the school? I donā€™t know whats in your contract but you might not even be allowed to date other school employees. So that could be something. Also Iā€™m not sure what you said but it could be considered sexual harassment. If it was just your kids teacher how are the other teachers treating you differently? Are you often in the school having contact with them? Either way obviously it wasnā€™t the best idea to tell this person how you feel, sounds a bit inappropriate.

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I donā€™t know about discrimination but it sure sounds like harassment and bullying if you didnā€™t do anything towards the teacher speaking on your feelings and not being graphic about your feelings that has no grounds or anything

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Discrimination against what Iā€™m confused about the whole thing :woman_facepalming:t4:

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Do you make your self happy no One else matters

There are too many missing elements here for even give ya any advice on this situation hun.

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I donā€™t understand what your trying to say

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So wait. Who are you then? Are you a teacher? Or just have your kid enrolled in the school? Discrimination? For what? The fuck happened to the other part of the story? :woozy_face:I donā€™t get it.

Omg! There was an attractive male teacher at my sons school and some moms (and at times grandmas) would always be touchy with him.

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OP are you still alive or has your cat murdered you already?

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Where are the periods . I think the lack of made the post confusing . Just stay away from any teachers .

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I feel like thereā€™s a whole lot of information left outā€¦
I donā€™t think itā€™s normal to develop feelings like that for your childā€™s teacher, I can say that. As to the rest Iā€™m at a loss

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Ugh yeah you coming across as a little psycho. No thatā€™s not normal and youā€™re probably making them very uncomfortable

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Just because itā€™s a thought doesnā€™t mean you have to express it.

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Okay so if the teacher liked you too and neither one is married but if you have no idea if the teacher feels the same and you just went around telling other teachers yea thats not normal but again not enough background was provided so šŸ¤·

There is so much missing in this post, but my opinion would be absolutely NOT!!

This is about your child school/education this is the child safe place. Not mamaā€™s dating app. Keep things separate as you can now see why! The kids are the ones who pay for the parents errors! Teachers are there to teach not socialize with parents. Legal advise for whatā€¦if you donā€™t like it or in lamest term fd it up for your kid, well Mayb youā€™ll need to but the bullet and pay for private schooling since again u fd it up. Donā€™t make it worse for your kid stop putting a spotlight on the situation. If u feel embarrassed or discriminated imagine what your child is going thru! Get :clap:t4:Itā€‹:clap:t4:Togetherā€‹:clap:t4: grl :speaking_head:!

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Kid got a hot teacher eh.

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So have you approached said teacher? Told friends you like said teacher? Did you tell teacher how you felt or did you just mention it to friends???

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I donā€™t understand what I just readā€¦.

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I canā€™t tell if youā€™re a parent or another teacher either way it sounds like youā€™re emotionally invested so yes itā€™s weird and bad donā€™t do that

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I fell for my granddaughters kindergarten teacherā€¦Iā€™m not a lesbian but something about herā€¦ she was an amazing personā€¦and a male teacher at ghe same school alot of women had a crush on

Also he could be married you never know. He could be the type that is very friendly and people misread this as something more JS figure out if he feels the same way cause if he donā€™t you are setting your self up for some heart break good luck to you.

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Umā€¦ sounds kinda creepyā€¦ do they like you too or no? Lol

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My kids had several teachers who us mums had a thing forā€¦ But it was just a bit of fun, a bit of eye candy in the playground while waiting for the kids to come out of school etc

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You had feelings for someone for two years that wonā€™t go away? No wonder they talk about you. Sounds like you were turned down and wonā€™t let it go.

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Idk man Iā€™ve never seen anyone express there feelings to a teacher on a personal level. Kinda is odd and there is alot missing to this post.

Confused and wondering if this is a parent. But, sounds like a student. Highschool? College? All I can say is pray about this. If your in HS , no donā€™t go there. There could be legal consequences ,you are a minor. If in college ,no. It would cause confusion and misunderstanding of your intentions. If your a parent of a child , it would cause confusion for the child and open a door for other students to cause trouble. If the other teachers are causing mental abuse ,you may have a legal case. All you can do is talk to a lawyer for a consultation. I believe some a free. God bless.

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Thatā€™s a lot of words for so little informationā€¦ā€¦

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Iā€™m confused. Need more information to understand. What are they doing to make you feel discriminated against and what did you say to the teacher.

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My daughters 3rd grade teacher was a very good looking manā€¦and his wife was just as pretty. I can admire the mans looks but yes keep professional. Iā€™m married myself and my hubby beats any man in my eyes for my attention. (However thanks to Mr. Teacher I didnā€™t have to do math the new way Theyā€™re teaching it cause I explained I didnā€™t know wtf that is and Iā€™m doing it the old school way when helping with homework and he was :100: ok with that) he was a great teacher :+1:

This page has become really odd with the updates from ā€˜realā€™ people

:upside_down_face::no_mouth::sweat_smile:

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Never mix business with pleasure

People laughing at you for being a nutcase isnā€™t discrimination. Get a dictionary before you waste money on a lawyer.

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What kind of discrimination is this? Leave that teacher alone

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I love that these questions are asked unironically.

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Iā€™m not sure I completely understand what I just readā€¦ does this teacher feel the same? Are you a parent or another teachers? I just get a bad vibe from this entire situation here. Whatever youā€™re doing stop it. Does this teacher feel the same or are you being like creepy? Idk this whole post doesnā€™t make sense

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If the teacher didnā€™t feel the same way back then move on and let it go. You stayed how you
Feel and thatā€™s that. If you continue to go in and try to pursue something that has already been doubt with then you are the issue and you need to stop. Very vague information here. Bottom line if they fee that way back and itā€™s legal then go for it but if they do t then donā€™t be creepy and move on! Maybe the teacher feels like your harassing them or they are uncomfortable?

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I feel like this page has become the new Reddit AITA. Itā€™s crazy what people ask here

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Maybe sheā€™s confusing acts of rejection with discrimination? šŸ¤·This post was confusing

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It sounds like one person has feelings for another person. OHHH NOOOO :roll_eyes:IF you havenā€™t acted on then then whatever. Itā€™s a crush, adults get them too. Looooong eye rollā€‹:roll_eyes:

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Now I know these have Gotta be fakeā€¦:roll_eyes:

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i mean if he didnā€™t show those feelings back then ya gotta let it go ā€¦.he not feelin it .

Yes you need therapy

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R u out of your mind?

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I am confused. What was said to the teacher? What are the ages involved? Weā€™re missing major details here in order to give sound advice.

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Where is the discrimination? This sounds like a good LIFETIME MOVIE I just sawšŸ™„

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Why was there not a single period? And what exactly is the discrimination? Sounds like you just need to put your big girl panties on and get over it

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Why is he still your childā€™s same teacher after 2 years? :thinking:

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It may not have been that big of a deal but you made it sound icky so Iā€™m guessing they felt the same.

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Itā€™s normal to develop crushes on people who you meet in your regular life. Whatā€™s not normal is acting on it when itā€™s inappropriate. I think telling your childā€™s teacher that you have romantic feelings for them is equivalent to acting on it and therefore inappropriateā€¦

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What in the Billy Madison is going on here :rofl: thatā€™s just inappropriate & weird. No legal advice needed. You need some common sense & that would be to pull your kid from that school & enroll in a different school & leave the fucking teachers alone this time.

Rejection from someone you have feelings for is not discrimination. Not sure where you and your friends are getting discrimination from.

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Another run on sentence.

The way the OP writes, seems as if she was the student. :eyes:

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What are you even talking about? Like you developed romantic feelings for them and they donā€™t return it? Once you told them and they didnā€™t reciprocate did you still pursue or did you drop it?
This is weird. And unless you have spent time with this person outside of them just being your kids teacher then you really shouldnā€™t have feelings anyways since you only know them in a professional manor and not a personal one.
This is missing too much info and context for anyone to be able to help.

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If this woman is single there is nothing wrong with catching feelings. This personā€™s job is a teacher what if she met him outside her son classroom and caught feelings would it still be inappropriate. My goodness people. Address it and move on.

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I think she means Defamation??? MaybešŸ¤·šŸ½ā€ā™€ļø
If theyā€™re talking shit & spreading rumorsā€¦thats defamation.
There is no discrimination happening here, at all

Honestly, you probably shouldnā€™t have said anything. There is a fine line with so many things when it comes to our children and their teachers.
Yea, it is normal to develop feelings for people. You canā€™t help who youā€™re attracted to, but you could have just kept quiet about the whole thing. At least until they were no longer your childā€™s teacher.
What sort of behavior are they exhibiting towards you that make you feel youā€™re being discriminated against? What exactly did you say to this teacher? Does the teacher feel the same? Did they reject you?
There is so much missing from this story to really get an idea of what needs to be addressed in order to help you.

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A lot of single mothers develop feelings for someone who they feel also cares for their child. I.e. a doctor or teacher of your child. This person is helping nurture your child in one way, shape or form. This sort of thing is very appealing to mothers and it is quite normal to develop feelings in these cases or even to fall in-love. So, yes, itā€™s normal. Whatā€™s not normal is what appears to be a kind of obsession. The post makes it seem that this happened 2 years ago and was unreciprocated. If that is the case, you need to count your losses and move on. I think itā€™s odd that youā€™re treated any different, because how would anyone else at the school know? If the other teacher is telling people, then you really know heā€™s not interested. Iā€™m not so concerned about your feelings as I am about your childā€™s feelings. I would be concerned that you not being able to keep your feelings to yourself will negatively impact your child, as itā€™s likely the other kids may tease him over it. Kids are cruel. In any case, the feelings are normal but the fact that you are using present tenses to describe how you feel are not normal, being that this happened 2 years ago. Cut your losses and move on.

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Seek help. The behavior is creepy.

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I meanā€¦are you two in an actual relationship now or are you just being weird at this point? Because this whole situation seems sketch.

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Itā€™s not illegal or discrimination to have an opinion or judge you for your behavior.

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Iā€™m sorry I canā€™t offer advice as Iā€™m very confused. Could a moderater possibly ask this person to clarify their post?? And add more details like if they are a student or a parent. Iā€™m guessing parent as it says my childrenā€™s teacher. But still I think we are ALL SUPER CONFUSED HERE.

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Instead of asking on here. Get a free consultation w an attorney. Get solid info back by someone who knows the law.

I feel confused. Like I canā€™t offer an answer. More detail is definitely needed.

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Is that person still your childā€™s teacher 2 years later? If not and you still have feelings for them. Ask them out and screw those haters. Iā€™ve worked at plenty of schools and teachers have relationships with parents and other teachers. Theyā€™re probably upset because they like that person too.

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Have u told the person? Iā€™d let them know u think they r hot and because u told people now they r judging u, and all these shitty people on here talking trash, its no different than telling someone that u think or fell a certain way and who r u to judge, a bunch of dirty people

Just from the way you describe it sounds extremely creepy !

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Are you from rotorua i seen on one of the pages teachers are sleeping with the parents :rofl::rofl:

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