Need advice, me and baby dad have split up several times over three years, (baby is ten months) he’s not seen our son since Christmas, I still have feelings for him, and he says he does me, but it feels like he is asking to me do stuff to prove it, but he’s just giving me little crumbs to keep me interested a pic now and again and a few messages. Do I hold out for him, or is it time to move on?? A bit of history we haven’t been together since Christmas, he has slept with a few women I haven’t slept with anyone. He says he still loves; I still love him and want him in our baby’s life. He wanted a DNA test done cause he thought I cheated I hadn’t it came back he is his son, but he still doesn’t seem interested in our little boy says he doesn’t feel like he is the dad they wanted an issue till Christmas when we had a massive row, and we broke up, up till then he was the perfect dad.
Move on and let him go
Move on. Your son deserves your full attention and that of someone who wants to be him. This jack wagon doesn’t seem to want to make any effort. It’s better for both you and your son to walk away. You both deserve more.
He’s not there as a father to his child so why the fuck would you want to be in a relationship with him?
How can you possibly be questioning if the deadbeat who hasnt seen your son for over half his life deserves to be in your bed again? Absolutely not. Kick him to the curb and keep him there with the other trash.
It is time you get rid of him. He wants to sleep around don’t take him back. He’s not interested in you or baby. You can do better. Don’t take him back. He doesn’t wanna see you or baby . Get rid of him. Get child support and say goodbye. He won’t change
Move on baby girl you & your baby deserves a lot better than what he’s giving y’all.
Awe seriously move on he feeds you crumbs because until now you’ve shown him it’s acceptable he could seriously put your sexual health at risk .Go find yourself and concentrate on your son he will be full of regret when a real man raises his son
Do yourself a huge favor and move on! Maybe he’s just lonely. You and your baby should never be the last option in anyone’s life. You both deserve better than that.
Move on. Dont look back!
Nope. If he had no interest in the kid he created, he’s got to go. Love isn’t enough to make a relationship work.
He feels that way cause there is no bond as what he is doing.
Trust Me , Move On !
Move on…he has and you’re just wasting your time…he gives you those little tidbits because he doesn’t want you, but doesn’t want anyone else to have you either…
Get rid be happy with your baby
Save your self the trouble and just move on. Let him be in his child’s life and co parent to the best of your ability and let things between you guys diminish that’s just my thoughts.
Move on. If he truly wanted to be with you, he would. Sounds like he’s trying to keep you holding on as a backup plan for if he doesn’t meet someone else. You deserve better
Move on, why would you want to be with a deadbeat father.
You already know the answer or you wouldn’t be asking… MOVE ON. He wants his cake and eat it too!
Kick him to the curb you deserve more than that
Leave and don’t look back he wants his cake and eat it to leave
Just let go… it sounds like he wants to play and string you along in case things goes south
I only read to the third line and I have my answer already. Yes, yes you should move on.
He is breadcrumbing you. It is feeding his ego to keep you on the hook while he dips his dick wherever. He is probably a narcissist. He accused you of cheating because he was projecting his own bad behavior onto you. Narcissists accuse you of the very things that they are doing. It isn’t you, it is him, and he will never change. Move on because you truly deserve better. Don’t settle for crumbs when you can have the whole loaf!
I’d absolutely move on. He has no interest in his son, hes sleeping with other women and not there for you or his son… you’re better off alone honestly. It seems like he just likes to give excuses and doesnt want to grow up.
He sounds like a complete waste of time
I think you already know.
Move on. He gives that little bit to keep you around so no one else can have you. You’re worth more and you and your son deserve better.
Fine example for your son to follow. Move on. Get far away from that trash
Honestly move on when your on the other side of it you will regret waiting so long
Its time move on if he has slept with other females then its time for you to move on stop wasting your time on someone that’s not going to give you the same treatment
Sounds like you know what to do
You should move on he can still be your sons father but I would not keep feeding him your love. When he text only text about your kid. If he wants to call to talk to you only talk about your kid if he wants more of you then say it straight you need to move on for your mental health you’ll find someone better someone who wants to be with you.
He’s already moved on, he’s using you as a back up…
Move on dont look back at all…find your own place you will be happy than stay in unhappy situations
Don’t put your life on hold waiting for him to figure his out
I stopped reading when you said he hasn’t seen your baby since christmas. Why would you want a man like that? He is obviously no good.
Get out and away from this jerk. Why put so much of yourself into someone who doesn’t have any issue disappointing you? Having a child does not motivate people to be better people and you don’t want to force him to be around your child if has no intention of being there. Yes he’s keeping you as a back up.You are better than that so don’t wait for this guy he’s not waiting for you. It’s time to focus on you you and your child and the right person will be there without games
Move on! You and the baby deserve better.
Hes string you along. I don’t think your anything more to him then a side pease /booty call to him. He also sounds like a narcissist to me.
So detach the dude.
Move on. You deserve better and so does your son
Move on. You deserve someone who doesn’t make you question you or your sons worth
Why are you settling for crumbs of affection when you should be having a whole cake?!!! You deserve better and so does your little one. Don’t put up with this behavior like you have been doing its degrading to you you are worth far better then that.
Your son deserves better move on.
Move on, been there done that!
I can’t decide who’s a bigger idiot, him or you?
I wouldn’t even think of getting back with a man who hasn’t seen his child in over 6 months. He’s clearly a winner.
He’s a shit father- why would you want that in your life?
Run!!! Fast!! Red flags all over the place! You deserve better, sometimes love isn’t enough.
He sounds like a complete asshole move on love and follow your
Girl, it’s June… you’ve already wasted half a year. Cut him off.
He’s stringing you along. He is sending you little signals that he’s interested but in reality he’s just keeping you on the back burner for when he’s bored and not getting the attention elsewhere. You and your son should not be playing second fiddle to his ego. He doesn’t deserve you, move one and find the love you deserve.
He doesn’t want you, he just doesn’t want anyone else to have you.
He can still be a good dad and you deserve better imo
LET HIM GO… I ended up having to finally give up after to many years of crumbs
Sounds like you already have your answer and your looking to validate. I always say…when in doubt, do without
Count your losses if he wanna be a daddy he will but it sounds like he dont wanna be daddy or partner
Move on you deserve better. Love isn’t sleeping with others. Either he is in it with you or not and he’s not from what you said
He hasn’t seen the child since December and I’m assuming he hasn’t called you so you need all of our advice to whether you should move on girl where are you sitting and vegetating get out there and live notify the court for child support and visitation if he doesn’t show up for court for visitation that’s his problem you need to move on with your life and you should have seen it before you ask all of us because you already knew in your heart but you don’t want that kind of life where he goes out and plays and shows up and then disappears again do you have a life now get out there and live it
Move on, he is not the one for you. Your too good for him!
Yes it’s time to move on, you will
Always care for him as you have a son together,it sounds like he is more interested in being single and sleeping around than trying to work things out with you( but he wants to to keep you strung along in case no one else is available) you cannt make him be in your baby’s life if he doesn’t want to be, don’t waste anymore of your life waiting for him, make a life for you and your son that doesn’t include Baby Daddy.
Let him go. He’s leading u on & any man who isn’t interested in his own child ain’t shit💯
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Move on. – You can love someone, and move on with seperate lives. The world is still continuing on… Your life has to do the same. If he hasn’t come around now, he won’t ever. Be happy. Life is to short.
Dump his ass and find a good man that will love u and your son
Sounds like he is keeping you around as back up in case he needs a booty call. Drop him and find someone that deserves you and your son.
Move on. Trust me. Youll be happier in the end.
Maybe a different perspective from a Dad who had his daughters moved away from him. It worked out overall over time but things really aren’t supposed to be so hard. They still may be.
Kids need both their parents almost always. If one parent is a shit, it is up to the children to figure that out for themselves over time. Ten months is a lot early so you have to do more as part of your job for a bit. It gets sorted out by the kids because they are not blind and sometimes even a parent who is kind of a shit is still a good parent.
I would not stay in a relationship that is so tenuous or uncertain. It is or it isn’t and I think you have an isn’t. Despite that to be fair to your baby, you should probably be clear that you are out but that he needs to still be Daddy and you should facilitate that as best you can. You need to still be parents together and sometimes that may be hard.
You can lean on his feelings of remaining love for you or however you want to handle it but once you have a child he/she should be the priority. Be flexible about weekends and time and all that as best you can. The better you manage those things the easier it will be for your child.
Get ready for more thinking and feeling as time passes. There will be boyfriends, girlfriends, step mothers and step fathers … and the relationships between them and your child needs to be allowed to develop too. The kids make their own decisions about those relationships and sometimes even with a rocky start, they become important too.
I’m still am not thrilled that my Girls have a good relationship with Dick … oops, I mean Richard, but those are things they need to work out for themselves.
Yup, rambled. Sorry. Sometimes I feel like those of us who have waded through the muck that life presents don’t share nearly enough.
Follow what you think is right.
Hasn’t seen your 10.month old since Christmas! nope…big nope…he is not the guy. You might be attached but he doesn’t give a toss about that baby and will hurt him over and over again. protect your young don’t let that man in
Wow. If he can sleep around he’s not too hung up on you. Y’all will be off not together.
For the simple fact he hasn’t had time for his kid should tell you!
If he slept with other women sis its time to move on. Trust me not worth the headache and the heartache that your doing to the child. My oldest son hasn’t seen his dad since he was 2 his fathersown chose to move on so I stop making effort when he did. But it’s more of a headache and you DESERVE a King
Move on. You deserve better. If he says he misses being a family, he ruined the opportunity. Don’t give in.
Girl, if it were important to him, he wouldn’t be making excuses and yall would be together. Behavior is the best indicator or intentions. You and that sweet little man of yours deserve better. Move on.
Oh! Grow up move on and dont move in till its the real thing.
Think of your child.
He is just using you.
Another woman, there is no and should be no forgiveness he gave another woman his love with his body you or your child do not need this in you life stay true to you, you are loved and needed more than you know, I don’t say it with any hate but he is only just a man determined by having having a penis it take everything and so much more to be a man a man that you along with some women need and expect a majority are sadly le5 down, breathe babe you can do this for your child’s sake and for your own xx
If he truly wanted you and your son, and to make you all a family, he would. It’s that simple. A man who wants to be a father, will be a father. Move on.
Move on and move on fast. Promise you it will be better in the long run. ASAP PLEASE
Wake up, he just doesn’t want you to file for child support. Grow up, you have a child and that is your first priority now. If he really wanted you he would not put his dick in other women. Don’t be a stupid idiot and let hormones occlude your common sense. Go to court, get a lawyer, get child support. If he wants that all to go away he will do the right thing and NOT screw other women and work hard to help you take care of the child you created together.
Tbh dont even know why you would want to give him any sort of opportunity when he doesn’t give his own child the time of day. Move on.
Read your post over again. Read each sentence as tho it was not written by you. Dont take him back. You and your son have so many wonderful days ahead. Leave him in the past.
Girl, if he can fuck other women he’s not still in love with you. He’s playing you because he knows how you feel for him.
Move on. You’re wasting time. He’ll never be the guy he was in the beginning of the relationship. That’s what you’re missing. That guy is long gone!
What a manipulative dick!! Girl, run.
Sound like you need to friend zone him for you and your child
Darling, move on…you deserve it
If he hasn’t seen his kid since christmas move on! You don’t deserve crumbs you deserve the the whole loaf! KNOW YOUR WORTH! You will always love him he gave you your baby but you deserve more and its ok to ask for more! And when you do finally move on DO NOT TAKE HIM BACK! he will just leave you again! he doesn’t want you but he doesn’t want anyone else to have you either! Just move on and be done with it! I have been in this boat JUST LEAVE you WILL be happier!
Move on, if he’s been with other women during your split and you take him back its like telling him it’s okay for him to cheat on you whenever he feels like it. You will always have some feelings for him he’s your baby daddy. Definitely move on to better things, hold your head up high with confidence and knowing you deserve a much better man.
Time to move on. Sounds like he’s honestly not interested in being a father or a good partner. Leave him in the past and don’t try to force him to be there if he doesn’t want to. Your son deserves better than a revolving door parent.
Honestly sounds like ur letting him choose when he wants to be around. It’s hard loving someone that doesn’t make you a priority but it seems like he needs to grow up and man up or you and your child are going to be left wondering why you aren’t good enough. Honey set your standards higher make him responsible and go find yourself a man that loves you and your son for you not what you have or what you look like. Then make that silly boy who gave you the most precious gift of a lifetime eat his heart out while you enjoy the best life you can. In the meantime focus on you and your son there’s no bond stronger than a boy and his mommas.
Run!!! Never ever settle you deserve someone who is available 100% not bits and pieces when it suits him, while he is still in the background you are making it harder to move on and meet someone who wants to be with you .renember the saying monkey see monkey do if you choose to stay your only teaching your son that it’s ok to treat women like that and we all know it really isn’t.
Go to counselling! I can’t stress that enough! You have some deep routed issues if your baby daddy hasn’t seen his son in months and you’re accepting occasional pics from him AND hoping he will eventually be with you again. Your son needs a stronger mother than that!
Move on. He’s just wasting your time. Find you again and love will come along. Someone will show up who loves your son and absolutely knows he’s not the father. He will love your son because he’s a part of you.
Truthfully, you need to move on… I’m saying this as a mom… You are worth so much more you deserve so much more… Don’t ever settle for anything less, EVER !!! He truly seems not ready to handle the responsibility of a child he doesn’t seem to want to recognize that he is his son… His actions speak so loud and clear… Time you straighten that crown of yours out and build a better life for you and your son … You got this I know you can do it:muscle: …
My suggestion is to close your eyes… and give all of your worries away… let them go as best as you can. I know it’s hard to let go of these things. When you open your eyes smile and learn to love yourself and make the most happy memories with your baby. If you and him are meant to be it will happen. But dont over analyze it, dont force it… just let it all be
I’d move on, I know it hurts, but babe if he hasn’t seen your son since Christmas why even give him the time of day. He can make time to sleep around with these girls but can’t take the time and see his son? It’s totally not fair how he’s being. I honestly feel like he’s keeping you for a back up, because he knows you still care. If he can’t make time for you guys then move on babe.
From my experience it sounds like he is trying to keep you on the back burner incase he dosen’t find the person he wants long term. This happened to me, I was so wrapped up in my feelings that I denied it when people pointed it out and I didnt see it myself. People can give you opinions all day but only you will be done when your ready and you’ve had enough. It took me 8 years and I wish every day that I didnt waste so much time. Until then the cycle will continue and you will continue to live a roller coaster.
He wants you back and is saying all of that because he knows you’re going to be right there waiting for him. He hasn’t seen his son since Christmas. That was 167 days ago and you’re wondering if you should get back with him? As unfortunate as it is that y’all have a child together and he’s acting like this. It’s time for you to start realizing your worth.
I’d move on. He wants you on the hook but nothing long term. Yes it hurts but the longer you hang on the worse it’s going to hurt in the long run. With a child involved, j wouldn’t be able to stay invested if they aren’t interested in their own kid.
First. Never. Ever. Put your life on hold for someone else. Do not hold out. You deserve love. You deserve faithfulness. Start talking to other men you’re interested in and don’t let him take any more time from you.
Second. No matter what man it is always stick to your boundaries. Of this dude leaves then comes back wanting sex and instant girlfriend benefits you need to make him earn it back.
Third. I have made the mistakes of holding out, kept trying desperately for a relationship that he never wanted. Please listen. When you finally break away you will feel like you had all that time stolen from you. I believe in second chances but he needs to show more than a pic here, a message there to get back with you. If he truly wants you, he’ll stop acting like a fuck boy.
You shouldn’t work that hard to keep him around! He hasn’t seen his kid in almost 6 months. He’s just stringing you along and that isn’t a good behavior for him to teach his child. You and that child deserve better❤