You can do a lot of things to help or change a relationship but withholding sex is the fastest way to bring it to an abrupt end
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Leave! He’s already cheating just by saying that. He is considering it. Do yourself a favor and leave. The kids don’t need that toxic crap around them either. Best of luck!
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It does not sound like it is over but you sre on the fence. Clearly both of you are not making meeting each others needs a priority. Please get some counciling now. You can turn this around. Let your husband know you want things to change so that you both can be happy in your marriage.
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He’s already cheating
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Hes probably already cheated. And to make himself feel better he tells you it’s your fault.
There’s no reason he can’t help
So follow him around, get proof of him cheating and take everything in the divorce, easy 
and if he’s telling you that, he’s already doing it so go get your stalking boots on and get your camera ready 
The amount of women here saying its her fault for not putting out is absolutely astounding 
the husband sounds like a prick. If any man comes out with ‘its your fault if I cheat…’ hes already cheating.
I had an ex who used to say stuff like that. It could turn into physical abuse. Please consider this. I left 5 months pregnant and haven’t looked back.