All you can do is educate him and and allow him to make his own choices because he is going to anyway. Being open is very important. Educate him on how it affects his body at his age and how it can open doors to other drugs. I’m not against weed at all but I want my children to wait until they are adults to decide if it’s something they want to do. If he wants to do it socially or if he is smoking daily all day make a difference as well. Sometimes being a realistic parent with open communication is the best!
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Could be worse, but I see where your coming from. I’d be pissed but glad that it’s that and not cigarettes, pills or other drugs. I’d just talk to him about it. Ask why he is doing it, if you prefer him not to let him know. If he does just make sure he calls you when he needs to go somewhere or get picked up.
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He will be fine. Tell him you trust he will be smart and keep it to himself.
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I started smoking it at 13, 32 now healthy as as long as he was honest with you
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Be thankful for one that your son is comfortable enough to be honest with you, and you can tell him as well that you appreciate that he was in fact honest with you. Then go ahead and have your talk with him about it. You can’t parent with the mentality of fear. There will ALWAYS be the chance that they go behind your back, but he also learned today that he’s not going to be able to hide that from you. He learned that you aren’t stupid, he tried something and immediately got busted. What he needs is for you to let him know that it’s not acceptable behavior and that he has to face consequences for it.
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Just make sure he does it with people who can be trusted. Never do it with people you don’t know. Make sure he keeps his grades up and keeps up with his chores. That’s really all you cna do
My worry isn’t him smoking weed it would be him getting his hands on some laced stuff or kush
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I smoke weed daily so here’s my take on it as someone who started young
Teach him the effects of cannabis - the medicinal effects, and the dependant effects. One cannot become addicted to marijuana (physically) however the younger they start, the quicker they grow a dependence on it because their bodies will stop producing the dopamine that it’s getting from THC.
It is NOT a gateway drug, unless you lump it in with other drugs such as cocaine and mdma.
Don’t put him in a spot where he feels ashamed to have experimented, it’s very normal - and the stigma behind marijuana is becoming less and less, therefore if you punish him negatively about it, he’ll probably continue doing it and not tell you (kinda like what I did my whole life)
On top of this all, if he has the possibility of bipolar, schizophrenia and anxiety, the higher thc levels will not help those mental obstacles.
Stay up to date on real facts about weed, stay educated on its benefits and downfalls. Do not rely on what the stigma has to say about it.
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I’d say… I’d rather him do it at home. To be honest, hes gonna do it. I would rather him be 18 or 20 and try it, but hes gonna do it. As long as he gets good grades and isnt out getting in trouble, I dunno man. Cause hes gonna do it regardless so what can you do to keep him safe, you know?
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I started smoking at 14, now I have a 13 year old daughter and I wouldn’t be ok with her smoking so young, ( not that my parents were ok with me smoking, I got my ass beat when they found out) just like I wouldn’t be ok with her smoking cigarettes or drinking beer. It can turn into an addiction just anything else legal or illegal. I would talk to them and see why they feel they need to do it. Maybe it does help their anxiety/mental status or maybe they’re just doing it to fit in.
He can bring doing so much worse. Don’t approve of it … But don’t make a Huge deal about it. Cus that will only make him go behind your back more.
Hopefully weed is the only thing his friends are peer pressuring, just teach him to have the balls to say no to real drugs.
I would start with asking him why he decided to try it, how it made him feel, etc
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Some people on here act like they’ve never been a teenager lol… I’d say be happy he’s honest with you. If it was me I’d advise of the responsibility that comes with this sort of thing and not to drive etc and that I don’t approve. However if he was ever in a situation where he didn’t feel safe or couldn’t drive to call me and he won’t be in trouble. Because the reality is teenagers are going to try things and I’d rather be a safe place for my kids rather than them just hide things and get into trouble with the law or worse.
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Its sad people saying this is ok. Yes it’s a plant. So is poison ivy…yall gonna smoke that next. Some of y’all probably would.
Let child protective services find out you allow him to smoke it. Argue the fact with with them as they’re arrested you for contributing to the delinquency of a minor.
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It’s really noy that bad it’s now become such a?big thing…at least he was honest with u
My son is 15. I allow him to use the thc pens or gummies from the vape shops. He’s going to do it anyways and at least I don’t have to worry about him getting laced crap off the street.
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I think you need to educate him about the affects of drug abuse teach when too much is too much etc
As long as he’s not being dumb and doing it in places he will get caught I don’t see a problem w it. He was honest w u . Just make sure u know where he is when he’s doing it and let him know he can call u whenever and he worn be in trouble
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I’ve been smoking weed since I was 11 years old. It actually helped me concentrate in school. I was and still am a major pot head. I’m not saying to allow it because regardless he’s not of legal age but there’s really not much you can do to stop him.
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Only bc it’s so young and the brain 
, the brain is not ready for such alter:frowning:
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If it has become legal in your State you need to educate him. Also remind him he could get in alot of trouble on the street. Most states legal age is 21. Possibly offer him use at home only. At least he will be under your supervision and possibly it will alleviate the sneaking around and using.
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I mean at least he told you and well talk to him about it .
Frankly you should let your child know you are disappointed, let them know your concerns especially when it comes to the possibility of getting pot laced with harsher more dangerous drugs. Punishing him severely will only teach him ways to hide it. If you set ground rules like not on school nights, and if his grades slip then he will be in deep shit, maybe he will be respectful and follow the rules, each child is different though.
I have seen multiple studies where cannabis use in adolescence rewires their brain negatively. And I wouldn’t want my future children to have those impacts ESPECIALLY when it comes to school. My brother and my best friend have used cannabis since they were around 15-16 (my brother is almost 30 and my best friend is 26) and they both have reduced emotion regulation, memory, and increased impulsivity. For reference my brother has punched a hole in the wall because of a video game (while being high). I get video games can be frustrating, but it shouldn’t be so bad to punch a hole in the wall. Take what you will from what I’ve learned 
. Also, take into consideration that he may just be getting high to fit in with his friends. I personally wouldn’t want those kind of friends hanging around me or my future children. The longer someone smokes cannabis, the less their brain produces dopamine, so when you stop, you get a dopamine crash. Be on the lookout for it.
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You let him explore. Weed is weed it is not a hard drug. You educate him about what is safe and what isn’t you make sure what he is getting isn’t laced with anything and let him know you are disappointed he is doing it but that if he is going to do it anyways you make sure he’s safe about what he’s doing.
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I think he’s too young for you to be cool with it. Let’s say 15, 16 then maaybe? And if he is responsible and if it’s not affecting his behavior in a bad way that’s the time you can be ok with it maybe? But right now he’s just too young.
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I’ve had a similar experience with my 13 year old. Except I didn’t catch him, but he was honest. Personally, I smoke, my husband does and we are very honest. I told my son that he’s just too young. Same as alcohol. I told him his brain isn’t even developed yet and there can be I’ll consequences. When he is 21, fine. Its gonna be legal when hes an adult so best to get him informed on medicinal and natural remedies. Honestly, we dont drink, and he knows alcohol is basically poison. He needs to learn coping mechanisms other than weed at such a young age. Meditation. Stuff like that. I realize I sound hippy dippy, but I also have really good honest kids.
You explain the effects it can have on a young brain and show him evidence and let him make his own decision. You can’t force him to stop bc he will find a way to do it if he really wants to. If y’all are as close as you say, he should trust what you say and not feel like it’s out of control and may listen to your advice.
I honestly think with him being that young that if you let him you would be doing more harm than help
I would tell him it’s better to wait until he’s older if he wanted to experiment with this. Wait until his brain is more developed because while I think there is nothing wrong with marijuana, I don’t believe children who’s brains are still developing should be doing it
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Also ask him how often he does it and what is the reason. If he’s doing it to have fun and fit in that’s normal but if it’s to alter his mind bc he’s hurting you need to get to the bottom of it.
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My boyfriend and I had this talk with each other about this topic, he smokes and he doesn’t mind our kids doing it at a certain age and only if they do it at home, so he knows that they’re okay and he can keep an eye on them.
I would just talk about it, he’s already so open with you and that’s a good thing at least he didn’t lie about it.
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Not that big a deal? Until he tries something more deadly and harmful. Question is, do you approve of it? If not let him know. What happens if he gets stoned and has no control over what he is doing. Maybe not now but when he is behind the wheel of a vehicle.
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EDUCATE YOUR SON ON THE DANGERS AND THE FACT THAT IT IS ADDICTIVE…NO MATTER WHAT HIS FRIENDS SAY. Oops sorry for the caps. Ask questions to find out how much he knows and what he feels is true facts regarding THC. Maybe ask…do you think this to do you think that? That way he won’t feel like you’re coming at him in a negative way. Ask him how he thinks his use (regular?) of marijuana will affect his future? As in the cost of addiction. Maybe all his income will be used for this if it becomes a regular habit. I really hope you get through to him sooner than later. Hope some of what I said is helpful 
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Honestly my mom was in the same situation you are in now with me and she would only allow me to smoke at home so if something went bad (laced with something) she would be there
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Educate him, urge him to be responsible and I say let it ride. I know my experience with my teenage son(who is now 18)was that we agreed at 16 if he chose to he could start smoking, but he was going behind our backs and smoking anyways at an earlier age. His father and I both used to be smokers, so it’s not something we frowned upon, just wish he had waited til he was a little older.
Once he finally admitted to us that he was smoking we urged him to be responsible in his choices. Ie not getting behind the wheel etc.
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I started when I was 12 and i got hooked I was awful when I didn’t have it. People say it’s not addictive but it is and I wish I had never touched the stuff I wouldn’t ever again it made my mental state so bad and I still suffer now. But there isn’t a whole lot you can do if he wants to do it he’s going to unfortunately. If my sons came to me and told me then I’d say its your life but I would explain to them exactly what it’s done to me and my life and how it’s affected me mentally in the long term z
Honestly there are far worse things he could be doing number one and number two it’s been proven that marijuana isn’t a gateway drug I think you’re safe girl
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my parents had very different methods for dealing with me.
My father let me do what I wanted so as to learn from my own mistakes later down the road, and my mom played jail warden and did everything in her power to keep it outta my hands. Let’s just say neither method produced any sort of favorable results, whatsoever lmao
It worries me once the loose the buzz from weed that they turn to the next thing.
I have 0 tolerance for it lol
Where I live weed is legal, but parents can and do get charged if their kid has it. My ass is not getting in trouble 
I’d be concerned with where he got it. Weed can be laced with anything.
Honestly for me, I’d tell him that I’d rather them do it either at my house or at their house cause no matter what if they wanna smoke and get high they’re going to do it, and if they do I’d very much rather them do it at my house where I know they’re safe and not out riding with it or going somewhere else to do it and get in even bigger trouble. But that’s just my opinion right now, thank goodness my kids aren’t old enough to want to mess around with anything, but when they get to that age I’d rather them be home and safe instead of out doing it and getting in trouble
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I say be glad he is not drinking alcohol…
He was honest now you have an open door. Proud of him…
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Honestly I’m glad this isnt something seriously like mèth or anything but I don’t know what could be done
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Educate - don’t discriminate!
Why you hating on all us stoners?! We just wanna live peacefully - you can find me on my corner holding a cardboard box I guess jk you can find me working my full time job, going to college full one and raising a child as a single mom in the house that I pay for with my own money!
God damn prejudice comes in way too many shapes and sizes
See if he will share
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Hes been honest… and well done for not going crazy… its just a plant 
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Get away from these So called friends and. Get him help Now
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I went through this with my son who is now 17. He tried to hide but I could always smell it on him. The truth is if you punish him or make it a “rule” that he can’t smoke more than likely he’s gonna do it anyway. I’m not saying be ok with it because I definitely wasn’t and I’m still not, but be cautious of how you act and things you say when talking with him. Teens are rebellious. Just do research and show him the effects it can have on him while he’s so young and hope he’ll listen.
Get him a drug councillor, my lad turned to drink and drugs at 15/16 and that’s what I did
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Applause that he was honest.
My conversation would go something like this.
“I know you want to experience things with your friends and try new things. However, until you are of legal age this is technically illegal and you and the parent of the home you were in could get in serious trouble for this. Additionally, you have a lot of growing to do, including mental and emotional growth. Smoking now will stunt that. It can’t make you smarter. But I love you and trust you and pray you will make the right decisions. Thank you for your honesty. I love you, more than your buddies ever will and I only want the best for you.”
How do I know to say that? I have 4 teens in my home.
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my daughter was going to a supposedly BEST friend of mine at 13. i neverrr let her stay anywhere else. i TRUSTED this friend. well i found out she was letting all them smoke weed. cigarettes and drink heavy liquor! 
i ended that friendship immediately!!! she wasn’t allowed to go back. me n my daughter are super close also n she admitted everything to me. my friend kept tryna lie. anyways i talked to my children about drugs as soon as they were old enough to know. well long story short when my kids were 18 they started drinking n smoking again. i told them long as they were at MY house and not driving they could. i talked to them about all the drugs etc. they are about to be 22 now. the weed helps my daughter sooo much because she is bipolar. ptsd. and adhd. so i don’t mind her smoking it. they don’t do it a lot tho. i have twins so i had to deal w it w both at same time. and i’m a single mother on top of it all. i used to smoke when i was 18-19
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Man, I hope and pray my girls ONLY smoking weed in their lifetime. We were 13 once and weather our moms and dads said no we still found around that NO to make it happen. My oldest is 13 and I have.told her multiple times comes to me first before she tries anything.
Half of you adults probably smoke it yourself and coming up here as the parent of the year.
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You can explain how unhealthy it is. Smoking anything is dangerous for the lungs especially that young. How it’s loaded with chemicals and who knows what else, since it’s grown so “controlled” and by corporate agencies. Much like cigs
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My kid would be on lockdown
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He’s honest with you which is rare lol honestly as long as he’s doing well in school and he’s behaving and be responsible about it I mean 
I still partake in it and get the shit I need to get done done sooo and I started at his age.
Leave him be. As long as he’s not getting into trouble and he’s doing well in school…. I don’t see the issue here at all.
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Like anything in life, moderation. Pot in excess amounts to an underdeveloped brains not good.on flip side it’s good with some medical issues.
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Gotta talk about consequences. Even though it’s legal in many places there are plenty where it’s not. I’ve seen people get more time for weed than sexual assault. Which brings me to another concern. Weed does lower most people inhibitions(not all) and most of the ppl he will be smoking with are new to it. There are plenty of situations where people get drunk/high and then regret what they did and then lie. I would steer clear of “this is your brain on drugs” type of stuff bc he’s already heard that. In all fairness, some very intelligent ppl smoke and so that argument doesn’t always hold up. At 13 it’s still illegal everywhere and he could ruin his life. Adults have sex. Teens have the drive and ability but most ppl don’t encourage that. Not bc sex is bad but bc they are not mature enough at that age to be responsible and think about the consequences.
Make him aware of the risk. And that getting caught and in trouble can cause YEARS of unwanted consequences. Probation, classes, fines, community service…cps investigations that could affect the whole family. Nothing fun about it…It will affect his school and also he needs to be cautious of bad influence friends that could get him involved in more trouble. I was getting high when I was 13 and I went thru all of it.
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Be greatful he isnt out drinking or using hard drugs. Id just set some ground rules and make sure him and his friends are being safe.
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I started smoking at that age too. It’s normal. My parents didn’t like it either but they made it comfortable for me to want to open up and be honest therefore I didn’t bother hiding it and lieing to them I just did it when I knew it wouldn’t be an issue. Don’t try to discipline him cause it’ll only make him wanna do it more. Just let him know what could happen and warn him about the other drugs that could potentially take his life and or ruin it. U could try compromise with him. Only allow him to smoke at home. Or maybe before bed. Or only supervised. But don’t try to take it away completely cause it’ll only make him wanna do it more but he more sneaky about it
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I would be SO stoked he was honest w me lol. And then maybe share some info on what Marijuana does to a growing brain n tell him why you’d rather he wait. But regardless, I will always teach harm reduction over abstinence.
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End the relationship with those friends. Too young to be doing that. I would even take it far enough to change schools. His peers are very important influences in teens lives.
Honesty and being open are key. Good for you mama. That’s so great that he felt he could be honest with you. Congratulations there. I recommend transparency from here out. Let him know the dangers that go with smoking pot when you don’t know where it comes from but don’t be juggy. You have done something right obviously if he can be honest with you so just keep it going. Kids are going to experiment I feel it’s good to be open with them about the pros and cons without judgment. They are gonna do what they are gonna do.
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Where’s the money coming from…I thought weed was expensive.
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I was in the same boat questioning myself if i let it happen then I’m giving his undeveloped brain more harm then good but then if I don’t he will take off and do it anyway. Recently I was pregnant and he was taking off all the time all hours of the night. Waiting untill I’m asleep to leave and go smoke with his mates but that also got him with the wrong crowd who were steeling cars and he would drive them and ended up in a couple police chases. He’s only 14… I was getting woken up heavily pregnant with the police telling me I was lucky my son was alive after that chase. I sat him down and got to the bottom of why he was taking off. Ive always been strict with mates. He said to go hang with his mates and sometimes they smoke weed. So I said even though i don’t want him smoking he can have a smoke in the weekend if he has done his chores and gone to school everday. The day I let him smoke was the day all the running away getting into stolen cars and risking his life stopped. So it’s sort of good and bad it’s hard. I prefer to be able to manage his intake apposed to him taking off and smoking stupid amounts just to see who has the biggest cloud. So for his brain it’s not a good decision but for his life it was 
now I get better sleeps knowing he’s safe and he’s not taking off and we are sleeping with the doors locked now and he’s not out there risking his life, breaking the law and hanging out with naughty Disrespectful teens doing adult things. I reminded him that those cars a mama with like 5 kids might have saved up for a long time to get that car and now they have to walk in the rain to the supermarket. I said if he did it again he will be walking to the supermarket in the rain to buy his food. Hasn’t happened again since… I’m also in his head everyday about the effects of making the wrong choices and make him watch addiction youtube clips.
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I am not sure how I would react. I would not be happy but I would appreciate the fact my child told me. It is not scientifically proven but may affect cognitive skills as he gets older. I am pretty sure you need to be 18 to legally smoke weed, I would also explain that if you are a minor and get caught with weed in your possession the court may order substance abuse treatment, a fine, or probation and in some cases placement in foster care. I would encourage him to wait till he is older and it is okay to say no and not fall into peer pressure. Good luck!
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Find out where the friends are getting it from. If it comes from the streets drug dealers lacing EVERYTHING with fentanyal. Be honest and open with him about it
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He might need it. My 18yro told me same. He said it helps him with depression. It actually does, I can tell. My son and I are really close too. I use it for my sle(lupus) he sees how it helps me. It could be worse it could be cigarettes or alcohol.
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I would thank him for being honest and then would show him the long term damage that can occur from starting to smoke at his age with his developing brain. Nothing wrong with it once he’s grown but does he really think it’s worth affecting his long term brain development. Also ask him why he wanted to do it, like what was his thought process in wanting to try it so young
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First, THANK HIM for being honest. Sit down and talk with him, get an agreement of what not to do.
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The first thing I would do is have an honest conversation with him and be very clear about your expectations and then I would contact the parents of the other kid because how come they have a bunch of 13 yo smoking in their house and they don’t even notice it. Also who is providing weed to these boys? Those would be my concerns
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I’d be grateful it’s weed and not heroin, Xanax, percs or anything else.
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Be the parent are going to let him drink 
because he wants to are going to let him drive because he wants to be the Parent seems to be a lost art these days
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I’m going to be the unpopular opinion. If the child has good grades and is a good kid, I see nothing wrong with marijuana. It’s better than all the adhd drugs being pushed onto children and antidepressants. Alexis bortel has been smoking marijuana since 8 years old!
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Most of who comments are “leave him alone” are the ones smoking pot. You need to find him a hobby that will take up his time. Most kids today only know how to play games and their hobby is a figgit spinner. Try cooking, fishing , boating, carving, piano, gardening, Motorcycle, biking, hiking, finding new lakes in the area. My nephews are into hunting fishing. They spend so much time tracking and taking pictures ( also spend their money on good acquirepment , too broke to buy weed) js
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Get past your fear of weed and be glade he opened up to you the best thing you can do for him is get over it he going to do it either way and if you get on to him he my not be honest with you next time.
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There is nothing you can do
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my mom told me she would rather know than not know and that she’s not gonna try to convince me to stop because i’m gonna go whatever anyways. as long as i’m safe doing whatever i’m doing. i’m an adult now with a daughter and because she let me do what i wanted within reason, we are a great duo, and ik me and my daughter will be too
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Some of the greatest people in history and in the present day smoked weed. It’s been around for a lot longer than the negative propaganda that’s been used to try and justify the war on drugs. It’s the greedy manipulative system that makes some people look brain dead. Not the weed.
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First, I applaud your son for being honest. Second, I, personally, see no issue with marijuana…it helps me with my anxiety and depression TREMENDOUSLY.! Better that than everything else he could be getting his hands on.
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Vicki A K O’dee your doing the best you can in probs one of the hardest things to accept but hey i know you got this and dylan doesn’t look the type to go any further he’s got a great mum with experience so he knows the drill 
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My older daughter smokes weed. I’ve known for years that she does. Her dad and I are not together anymore but both agree that we would rather her do it at home… Where we KNOW that she is safe. And as long as she does what she is required to do … School, chores, ect…we don’t give her crap about smoking.
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Wow can’t believe some of these messages. You need to read what pot does to a young brain and talk to him about the issues he will face making the choice to start before his brain is fully developed. Sports are a good outlet to keep them busy but not always away from pot but it helps. Pot is not the same today as it was in the 70’s much more TLC and many ways of smoking it. Just get educated and help him research the right articles.
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Tell him you’d rather him be doing it in the safety of your own home and definitely thank him for is honesty !
The bigger deal you make it the more likely he will start lying and going behind your back. Just try to remain positive and keep lines of communication open.
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As long as school is priority and isn’t a lazy ass no issues and that’s amazing he felt comfortable enough to tell you
You’re lucky he told you. It sounds like he feels safe with you. Not app kids feel that way or are safe in their parents hands. Trying to stop a kid will only push them to do things behind your back. Be open. Maybe try talking to him about why he smoked? Was it just to experiment or is something else going on in his life?
Education is key. Do you and he know all the benefits of cannabis? Is he suffering from any anxiety, adhd, ptsd, epilepsy etc?
Is he experimenting? Explain how it can be used medicinally, or easily abused if used recreationaly and is illegal for people to use, or use under 21 unless prescribed medication, depending on what state you’re in. The more information the better.
Once they start there is no stopping it unless you plan to lock them inside. Even then you’ll have s child who skipped school and things will be much worse.
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Maybe he feels lonely.there something wrong with your parenting. If the child feels like taken for granted he will look for the other people that he might think he belongs.sad to say he found those bad influence colleagues. Give more time with your child talk to him more frequently,engage him to play or what he wants to do for him to enjoy. Make him feel your always there for him and your by his side as a mom. Marijuana is actually medicinal only if you have underlying illnesses but not good for a normal health status.
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He is bored. Get him interested in something like sports, music,physical activity, camping, etc. He needs your attention more than ever.
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They are going to do what they gonna do. Just voice your own opinion about it.
What state do you live in? Check all laws regarding usage. And if it’s legal in your state, sign him up for a medical card.
I smoke to help fuel my appetite and to help me sleep.
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When I found out my son smoked that fake weed that’s really bad I told him I’d rather him smoke the real shit and I wouldn’t care. The fake was a huge nope and he never did it again.
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You being close is why he doesn’t give a damn if he does it . What are you going to do about it? You all are friends.
He’s so young ung ,I my self smoke weed ,and have a thirteen year old. Grades good attitude ect… but I’d still say no. And if the cops find him before I turn that’s a decision he’s willing to make.
He’s gonna keep doing it behind your back…I know your not ok with it but make rules together about smoking it…like he cant smoke before school n only with certain people n place …that’s how I did it…good luck…
I’d rather have my son tell me. Honestly. That’s just my personal opinion. If your worried about him doing it at a friend’s house just maybe say he can only smoke when he’s home. That way you can keep an eye on him and make sure he’s safe while doing so.
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