We were made to eat what was being eaten at meal time and you either ate it or you did without. If you didnt eat your main meal, you werent allowed pudding. You soon learnt that you weren’t going to pick and choose, because there was no such thing as wasting food. If you took more than what you could eat, you sat there until it was all gone but if you took smaller portions, you could always go back for seconds. What bothers me is when you have a child that spends time with one parent and then goes to the other , usually one parent will insist on the child eating certain foods and when he/she goes to the other parent, they let them eat what ever they want. These kids get mixed messages and then form a stance based on whatever they want to do, come meal times. If you let her whine for long enough, the child will get the message that you mean business and know what the consequences will be. Feeling sorry for them is not teaching them anything, because you have to take charge and not let them tell you, how it should be.
My kid’s eat what I make. If it is something that they don’t like but another loves I only make it occasionally. They get a no thank you helping (2-3 bites) but I make sure that there is part of the meal that they like. They don’t eat dinner then they don’t have dessert. I also don’t let them eat anything 2 hours before dinner.
You might try having her help make the menu choices and help with the shopping and cooking. But you are correct in not catering to her temper. Here is dinner, we are eating together. You don’t want to eat, okay, but you don’t eat until breakfast.
As a Parent of 30yrs, I gave ONE of Two choices, Eat what I put infront of you OR wait until breakfast ! No dessert, No Snacking end of conversation. A child WILL eat what’s put infront of them when they are Hungry enough. You are the Parent say what you mean and mean what you say ,Stay consistent !
It’s the age, mostly. They grow out of it, usually. Seems like 7/8yo to 13yo are trying years. Lol
I used to try to make my kids eat stuff they didn’t like, until one day, it hit me I’m not going to eat anything I don’t like, so why am I trying to make them? Now, that they are older, they eat more stuff. 
good luck momma
Yes snacks all day is not right to eat for a little kid if she doesn’t want to eat then she don’t eat at all bottom line whatever you cook that’s the meal on the table that’s what they eat
Personally, I put what I made for dinner on the plate, and a small amount of something my daughter likes. I let her choose what she eats on the plate, but if she doesn’t eat it, then she doesn’t get dessert.
Ur rules when she is home with u. If she is going to be picky like that, make her sit at the table til its gone, or send her to bed hungry. Do not give in. Wrap that food up for the next meal. I have an 8 yr old who tries to be picky but I make her eat it, especially veggies. She hates peas so I dont have her just eating plain peas, it will be mixed up with mixed veggies and I have her eat it like that, or it will be in a soup. U can also hide things in other foods and not let her know whats in it. My daughter hates onions, however if its cooked, she will eat them. U just have to figure a way during ur meal times to hide it within the foods u make so she will eat healthy one way or another.
My daughter only ate fruits and vegetables, no sugar til age 2, organic, etc… and she’s a fabulous eater now, always willing to try new foods. My stepdaughter and I would fight about food until one or both of us were in tears; she only ever ate chicken nuggets and hot dogs. She’s better now, at 7, but still picky. My son? I wish I could get this toddler to eat anything but crackers , fries, and applesauce. I dont fight it. I lost a lot of hair fighting kids on food. Maybe because, after four now, I’ve given up? They all grow up wanting to eat flamin hot cheetos and chocolate milk, anyway.
My kid barely eats some weeks and other weeks she eats like she has never had a meal. I only offer foods I know she likes because I’d rather not deal with force feeding her food she won’t even try. Dont offer snacks before or after dinner time. Eating isn’t about a power struggle and when you have that in your mind then YOU are creating a struggle. Just back off if she eats she eats.
Put your foot down you eat what put before you or no tv no games no nothing and if that does not work a smack or 2 won’t kill her spare the rod.
Never gave my three sons a chance to be picky, told them they are allowed to be picky when they get their homes.
Don’t let her get up from the table till it’s finished, if she doesn’t eat it. Then it’s for the next meal
Serve it to her again if she doesn’t eat it and say it’s all we have
Forget it. Win the struggle by giving up and letting her find her own way around the kitchen. Don’t starve her for God’s sake not letting her eat . Just enjoy your meal…end the struggle…do not give in to buying any fast food and TRUST she WILL NOT STARVE. Leave her to her own devices. She will return to the table in good time momma
You know seriously we beat ourselves up trying to get our kids to do the right thing but DOES IT REALLY MATTER ??? They do what they want anyway. They have free will!!! They wanna eat a pop tart for dinner! YahHoo!
Stand your ground. When she gets hungry, she will eat it. Don’t feel guilty if she goes to bed hungry. I bet she wakes up hungry.
I quit buying junk food told my kid they are sometimes food a we won’t have them but for special occasions.
Just keep doing what you’re doing. You’ll wear her down eventually
You get what you get and you don’t throw a fit at my house with my kids or you get a lick…i refuse to let them walk all over me i ask what they want once and make it if they change their mind want fast immesiate no🙅
Put the Plate of food in front of her like you do everybody else and say here’s dinner and if she don’t eat she don’t get dessert. She can watch the other kids enjoy dessert. If she kicks and screams let her kick and scream but ignore her she’ll stop and eat it’s hard but it works because people in this world they don’t have nothing to eat or very little
She will eat when she is hungry…She will starve they will.co.e around
My 15 year old hates most of my cooking 
I said great 
your on your own 
Idk, my kids eat when they’re hungry and they eat pretty much what they want when they want and we’ve never had any issues with them eating what’s in front of them. Offer small snacks throughout the day (bonus if they’re healthy) and small small small portions for meals. It can be overwhelming for such a small person that they can easily not know how to word what she wants or needs. Small small small small portions
This is about power and control. REFUSE to participate. Put up all snacks. Allow nothing but water between meals. Put down dinner. She has until you finish your plate to eat, then, take the food away and she gets it again at the next meal. No child will starve themselves to death. Even the most stubborn will cave after a day or two. You offer food 3 times a day. PERIOD. Refuse to fight. Ignore tears. Put the plate down, eat yours, and then take her up and or throw i away. Nothing to eat until the next meal. This is easy.
U get what u get & u don’t throw a fit! Who’s the parent?!
Girl, I am in the same boat.
Maybe try giving her two options for meals that you know she likes so she can kind of have a choice. Most of the time it’s a sense of control of something the child wants with my son it’s his hair with my oldest it’s her hair and her clothes they want to pick. Just like were not always in the mood for certain foods so we choose what were in the mood for kids aren’t any different in that aspect.
My daughter was like that until my doctor told me she was malnourished. I got her some iron and other supplements and the iron gave her big appetite so she ate what was set before her. She is big now and in university and sometimes some of the old eating habits chipped in but she is on her own. We are not even in the same country. Ignore her sometimes
First of your not a short order cook. What you make for dinner is what she eats. If she doesn’t eat it at dinner then she eats it for breakfast. If she doesn’t eat it then she can have it for lunch. She will get hungry enough that she will eat it. This is what my daughter’s doctor told me to do as she is picky as well.
you can’t make her understand, she already does. She is just digging her heals in and hoping that she will win. I have 4 daughters 27 thru 17 yrs… they never won at mealtime and they are now raising their own the same way. Hold your ground Momma! kids will eventually relent.
We never got choices as kids. We are what Mom made or we didn’t eat. Doesn’t take long to figure out that you have to eat what’s provided. Catering to a 7yo just causes you as the Mom to lose your parent standing and allows your child to start thinking that she can get whatever she wants if she whines enough.
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Redirecting...
Stick to ur guns. Its hard i know, but once she realises that u will not back down, she will eventually realise that games arent working. Try a reward chart and focus on positive things like if u eat ur meal u get a star. So many stars u get some money to spend or save. Offer rewards for trying new things, postive reenforcement works wonders, but make sure she understands that theres 1 meal choice, take it or leave it, it will not hurt her to go to bed hungry once kn a while x
I’m also old school, she’d go without
Everything you’ve mentioned in your post might be considered “junk” food. Where are the greens? salad, green beans, peas, etc.
I had a cousin that would only eat peanut butter sandwiches when he was little. At least he was eating. I don’t know if he grew out of it!! And I told my kids liver was steak-just dip it in ketchup!!
Send her to bed with nothing, if she claims she hates it then so be it go to bed hungry then…I’ve done that plenty of times to my 7yo and now she eats everything, if shes trying something new she has to have a decent bite chew to taste and swallow to determine if she doesnt like it, of she doesnt the first time we try once or twice more and of it’s still a no then we know it’s a no from her until next year…this kind of thing is a child trying to test what they can get away with, my kid gets away with next to nothing because I am the adult and was raised the same way…
For starters I don’t think it’s your house, if she’s with her dad he’s letting her eat whatever whenever, you need to confront him on this bc it’s effecting your rules in your home! No child is going to refuse something she enjoys eating unless it’s happening somewhere else. My daughter used to do same and she’s 8.
Same struggle here with 4yearold boy. Every night it’s a struggle and sometimes he eats everything but never twice in a row! It’s exhausting, all I can do is stay the course.
Involve her in the choosing and cooking process
Or
Try making charcuterie boards
I would suggest asking her pediatrician.
I. Was. Raised. You. Eat. What. Is. Put. On. The. Table. In. Front. Of. You. Or. Go. Hungry. I. Was. A. Single. Parent. With. 4. Sons. I. Raised. Them. The. Same. Way. I. Couldn’t. Afford. To. Cook. Separate. Meals My. Kids. Are. Grown. Now. There. Is. Few. Things. They. Don’t. Eat. Whatever. Is. Cooked. They. Eat. It. I. Don’t. Believe. In. Wasting. Food. Or. Money. You. Work. To. Hard. For. It.
Give her what you’re having and if she doesn’t eat it she goes hungry, she’ll soon straighten up
Get her to help you prepare the food, and let her help pick what’s being served.
I use to add another small scoop each time my kids whined about what was served…they quickly learned not to whine and just eat.
Sounds exactly like my daughter I’m after giving up give what she will eat waste of time arguing
Get her to help out making the food with you make it a fun time let her pick what your making then she has no excuse not to eat it as she helped making it
Have her help make the meal plan for a week at a time. I found that my daughter (who was not picky but craved organization), needed this to be excited about the meal SHE helped write.
We got two choices as children… Eat what’s in front of you or go to bed hungry