Dump him. If he truly wanted to be with you and the kids he would. 
Tell him your leaving on his day off… and go do something with yourself 
they will survive momma
Maybe he can handle showing them some attention if he only sees them every other weekend, and you can finally get a well deserved break, leave him and you’ll be shocked at how much easier it is to take care of things without him adding to the work.
If he doesn’t do it, someone else will 
He needs to grow up!
Dump him. What kind of boyfriend is he? If he really wanted to be present he would. His actions speak volumes. Try acting like you are moving on without him. Make plans with people you want to spend time with and don’t invite him, cut him out. Then you will see how invested he is. Just because you made babies with him doesn’t mean it is or has to be forever.
You can’t make someone do something they don’t want to do. But you can be the bigger man and show him the door out.
You take a day off. Make dad watch the kids.
You can’t make him. He has to realize that on his own.
Not cool and I wish I had words to help but my hubby is the same way and we are almost on the way to divorce
He’s super selfish
Doesn’t help pick up after him not asking him to mop or stub bathtub but simple stuff like wash your dish or put the trash in the trash can type of stuff.
Then when he has any free minutes or day off he wants to sleep, play video games and drink he’s in his mid 30’s so he not a young adult anymore
I have ask and bug and cried and done nothing and nothing changes
I’ve even taken the kids to a hotel before and it didn’t faze him at all I’m sure he was like good now I h e the house to my self
Anytime I had thing s planned like beach days or visiting family out of town and ask him to go he says no and I have to take 3 kids under 5 alone
I want out but I know my kids love him
I wish he could truly understand how much is hurt, effects our relationship, effects his kids and how unfair it is
Going on 14 years and he has never changed
He won’t and I can’t raise my kids this way no fucking way
He doesn’t want to be present when home he doesn’t need to be around period
He will regret it when he is older
If he’s not putting the effort it’s because he doesn’t want too, treat him the way he does to you and watch how fast things will change
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I wouldn’t marry him. I would stop asking him enjoy your life with your daughters. Do things, teach them things go on adventures. If daddy is there or not he will eventually regret not going out and experiencing these things with your children. Don’t wait for him. Enjoy your life while your kids are still young!!.
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I dealt with this… just stop. Don’t bother nagging him because clearly he doesn’t care. Enjoy your time with your babies. He will regret it eventually, but the harder you push it on him, the harder he will push it away.
It’s nothing you can do. You should only have to repeat yourself once, especially if he doesn’t have a listening disorder…
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You need to decide if he is ready for any type of commitment. He sounds very immature.
I’m sorry to say this, but it would appear that he has no interest in you or his children. You might as well move on down the road and figure out what you and your children need. It obviously isn’t him.
You can have a come to Jesus meeting, but at the end of the day, we all have to accept that we can’t make someone change for us. We can only decide how much we’re willing to put up with. Communicate, but if he continues to say he’ll change and never does, take the hint and choose yourself over him.
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You leave that relationship & then he can see what it’s like to spend even less time with his babies. You told him what you wanted & what would make you happy & he chooses to ignore that. Obviously he does t care about your feelings or he’d make it a point to change things & be there.
Find a man who makes time for you and yours without being asked.
My husband was that way. Now the kids are grown up and he really doesn’t exist to them. All the memories we talk about, never include him. They walk in and walk right past him, straight to me to kiss me. My birthday, Christmas, and Mothers Day gifts are very extravagant from them ( they are very successful) his gift from them maybe a pair of nice tennis shoes or a sweater. When they come visit ( three or more times a week) they are in whatever room I’m in. I have cancer now and when I’m not feeling too good and go to rest in my room, they all come in and lay in my bed with me. Sometimes for the entire day. I never discussed the fact that my husband neglected them because I was too busy having a blast with my kids. I would sometimes think it was too bad that he was missing out. Now I know the true meaning of the saying “ you reap what you sow” You can’t force your kids or yourself on your husband. It’s his choice, enjoy your children and your life. I didn’t miss a beat and I thank God for that.
So he works? Has a day off of not working? (sarcasm)
Sadly, you can’t make someone be a parent 
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Trust me when I say, if you guys are important to him now, you never will be, leave him now!!!
Lol why u still with him
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Girl… He’s cheating on you… He is disconnecting himself. Move on !
You already said it. Take the trash out. Much love to you.
He’s clearly not interested in your little fam. Leave him.
Nothing!! No matter how much you whine and bitch if he dont want to do shit he wont!! Its time to move on and live life for you and your children!!
Leave him. He’s not gonna see anything.
I dealt with the same ish before. Just leave. It won’t get any better.
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Leave. And don’t come back…
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He comes home one day, you head out. Or one day on his day off, you wake up (leave food for the kids or let him figure it out) and you head out. YOU need to put you first. Also, maybe just leave him altogether?
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My boyfriend isn't making time for me or our kids: Advice? - Mamas Uncut
My mom used to wait around for my dad when my brother’s and I were little. She would ask him to take us to play sports… to concerts… to the park… he never did. He never had the patience of time for us so you know what she did? She woke up one day and she took us to soccer. She played baseball with us. She took us to the park and to the farm and to everything else you could possibly imagine. Don’t wait around for him. You will be waiting forever.
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You can’t force someone to be a parent. And sadly, he probably won’t change.
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Your young I’m guessing it’s only going to get worse
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Leave him. Let him see exactly what he is missing. Go away without telling him where you are. If he can’t see what he has in front of him maybe he will see what is missing. Just a thought.
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I have a ex husband for so many reasons and that’s one of them… if he has free time and even like that he doesn’t spend time with you, is because he just doesn’t want to.
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You can’t force someone to want to spend time with someone. If you have to even ask, it’s not worth it.
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Move on … If he hasn’t by now, he’s not going to get better!
Plan activities and tell him what you’re all doing together.
Take yourself out for a cuppa etc with a friend when he’s home, leave the children with him.
Start doing your thing more and not letting him rule your life.
I told my sons father exactly this and you can do with the information what you please…
“If I’m going to be made to feel alone; I’m going to just do it alone.”
It’s scary, and guess what, I did DO IT ALONE. It’s not easy. Don’t let anyone try to convince you it is…but it was the best darn thing I could have ever done for my son.
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Nobody can force someone to make their family a priority.
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You can’t. You can’t force someone to do something they don’t want to do.
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Get sole custody, demand child suppprt and DUMP HIM. He’s a manchild and will not grow up in the situation you’re providing him. He’s not going to be the man you or your kids need. Get on with your lives.
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Id like to say leave them with him and just go do something but I believe in the end that could end badly for the kids. So instead have a long talk with him and explain that you need more from him and see if maybe there is something he needs from you as well. Communicate alittle more than him saying he will and waiting for it. Point it out to him every time he says he wants to do something other than spending time with you. I would even tell him you feel like he doesn’t want you because he doesn’t show it. Paying the bills isn’t showing his love.
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If he doesn’t make time for you now, he never will
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Yeah he aint your boyfriend he is your unattached babydaddy with benifits
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just of the top of my head now is the time to teach your kids you do not need someone else to have fun, you to
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Stop nagging at him 🤷
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If I could do over again I would have
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U do u and either he will be there or he won’t up to him his loss not urs and ur kids will remember who was there ans who wasn’t who wanted to be there and who didn’t
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My bf works 12 hrs a night on 3rd 6 days a week he still gets off work and makes us breakfast every day wakes up before I do to spend time with the kids and let me sleep in then makes dinner before he goes back into work my point is you can’t make someone do something they don’t want to…they do it bc they want to even if there tired or don’t feel like it. Hopefully your man sees how important yall are to him before its too late 
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Most of us are with our kid’s 24/7. Only time I’m not is when I’m at work. But I’m a single mom of 3. But you can’t make someone do anything. If they don’t do it, it’s usually because they don’t want to. No matter how much you want to change him, you just can’t. Does he support the kid’s? Does he pay the Bill’s? Does he work A LOT? If so, that could be a factor. That he works all the time. So his day’s off he just wants to be home. And I would be ok with that. Especially if he’s doing his part as a man, and being responsible.
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I stopped making myself available to him and waiting for him, if I wanted to do something or go somewhere with the kids I did and he started to see all he was missing out on. For example: the pumpkin patch. I USED to say ‘do you want to take a family trip to the pumpkin patch on your day off?’ And he would always be too tired etc. Now it’s like 'I’m taking the girls to the pumpkin patch Saturday. ’ and you bet your ass he’s up and ready to come with and if he wasn’t we would still go and have a great time. Life is too short to wait around and miss out. Good luck to you.
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Get rid of that zero and find yourself a hero
Selfish little prick is missing out
Leave him on the road
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Youcantmake someone see anything.
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maybe I am jsut getting too old, but most of this posts are about women with kids & only BF’s, Most of the time, some kids are from others, but sometimes with the same guy. Doesn’t anyone get married anymore?? I look at it this way, if no one is making the commit anymore, why should anyone think things are going to be any different in their home life??? Now I do know a few women who have been with their SO’s for over 25 plus yrs, Yes they have kids, but all the kids are from the same guy, I did ask them why they never got married & they said they are very happy just they way they are, it works, they all own homes together, They do everything married couples do, just they never thought they should get married, Plus it works for them. And they are very faithful with each other
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get a divorce and suddenly he will demand time with the kids–happens all the time.
You can leave for a week, and see the difference. That may waken him up, and if not, well you and your kids deserve true happiness, and no man in my eyes is worth it!
My child comes before ANYONE!
Good luck
Hes not a real man still needs some growing up to do
You shouldn’t even have to ask…tell that loser kick rocks!!
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Have you tried to talk to him to see if something is going on or if something is bothering him? I see the very quick to judge mothers came into play but what most fail to realize is there might be a reason that he isn’t saying. Sit him down but don’t make it about you or the kids or what you want, ask him if he’s okay. See if there’s something you can do for him that’ll make the situation better.
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You let him know a week in advance that he is babysitting on his day off because you have plans
You leave the house early before he wakes up on a day he has nice plans and u come back one or two days later haha
Hes literally SHOWING YOU what his priorities are. Just leave him.
I’ve been a single parent since my son was born and I would rather be on my own with my son then staying with the baby daddy who doesn’t even care about me and his son best advice is leave him
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I’ve been there too lovely you can’t force them into wanting to spend time with you and the kids unfortunately, I gave up and kicked my ex out now he spends time with our daughter every weekend and Atleast she gets the quality time she needs with him. I personally have so much more of a better life now then I did when I stayed with someone who didn’t make any effort. Good luck I hope you find some happiness and your girls get the time they deserve xx
First of all - is he hanging out with other people instead of you and the children or is he just basically hiding away from any and all responsibilities at home? If it’s the latter he could be suffering from depression - when my husband was really depressed and in denial about it he would go to work then come home and crash out, not bothering with anyone else. Because it was hard work surviving with all that going on in his head - but he was still going to support his family financially. Once he realised he did have a problem and sought professional help he was much better.
I do have to gently encourage him to do things with us and will just book stuff since I know his schedule (and if he hasn’t told me about something it’s on him not me 
). He is much more willing to be present now.
Mens minds work differently than ours so sometimes they are just oblivious to how we’re feeling about something as they don’t see it as an issue even though we do 
Unfortunately you can’t make him do anything… he should want to be spending that time with his family, maybe there’s a deeper issue? I would be having a conversation with him about it immediately because you don’t want your daughters to start picking up on it ya know
Start acting like it doesnt bother you. Take your kids out and do things together and dont be home when he does decide to come back home. Let him miss you and the children !
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This would be why maybe we should get a sound commitment (marriage) BEFORE we have kids and get in this situation. If it were me I’d discuss with him what I need to stay in the relationship and mention this was not the first request but would be the last. Sometimes it’s just time to go separate ways and choose more wisely next time. I stayed in a horrible marriage for 20 years and glad I got out. I’m now married to a wonderful man and every day is heaven even after 10 years of marriage. 
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Okay, since others jumped directly to him cheating or something else…
I’d sit down and have a calm conversation about the entire topic. No arguing or blaming… just ask him what’s going on. Communicate feelings, ask him about his, etc. I guarantee there’s something he’s facing or dealing with, either at work or his family, etc. Don’t just up and leave him because is he’s struggling with being a parent while yall are together, he’s still going to struggle with it if yall split. Get to know and understand his side, talk about compromise and working together as a team. More often than not, he will either open up about what’s bothering him and respect you for a calm conversation (and yall can come to an agreeable solution) or he just isn’t experienced in being a father. Maybe suggest taking parenting classes together… its a bonding experience! 
anyway, don’t give up just yet. Everyone deserves a second chance to make it right.
Women may be able to give birth and have the instincts to be a great mother from the start, but men aren’t like that. They often don’t know what to do…help him understand and grow as a dad. He’s human too, love.
Unfortunately whether you are together or apart you can’t enforce or force someone to be a father. Much like other comments he will learn when the kids get older and don’t include him. An there’s a possibility he may just never learn. This is my opinion but I would just leave him and find a man who will make time for you and the kids. Unfortunately if you stay your kids are learning how a man should treat them. That’s just my opinion though. Best of luck momma. I feel for you.
Sadly. There’s nothing you can do. He obviously has always detached himself from you and the kids. Basically he’s content with going through the motion of providing, but he’s already moved on from you and those kids. Not even leaving him will cause a change. Start your exit strategy and wrap your head around starting over. And don’t have any more kids with him. Sex won’t keep him and neither will more kids. Move on. You’re too good to beg anyone for attention.
What we allow is what will continue.
If you are gonna be a single parent…be a single parent…my ex use to do that. He took a nap when he wanted, he went out alone when he wanted. I was like boy bye. I packed me and the kids up and left.
I hate to say it but you can’t change anyone who doesn’t see a problem with their own behavior
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Nothing. He’s not interested for whatever reason. It may mean nothing more than it’s too much for him and could end up being a great dad as the kids get older and able to communicate and do more things. Or it may mean that he just doesn’t want to be an involved father. You could talk to him as if he’s an adult, not a child, in a non-accusatory, but rather concerned for HIM way, and see if he’ll reveal what motivates this behavior. It could be something as simple as how he was raised, so doesn’t really know how as he had no example to learn from. But, there’s nothing you can do to change it. He has to change it and he has to want to change it to do that. All you can do is decide how much and how long you’ll tolerate it.
Get a job, then you’ll understand.
Just stop trying. It sounds bad but you can’t make him be a good dad. Just live your life and make the best memories you can with the kids. He will realize his mistake. It may be to late to make it right by then but that isn’t on you.
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U have to work this kinda of stuff out early in relationships or it will get out of control… U should know the person better before having kids… Jus sayin take it easy…
You need to let him know that he will be taking care of them on the next day off and you need to go out for a little you time. Come back refreshed and happy. He will start wanting to go places with you. When he opts out? Take extra time making yourself look pretty and don’t check in. He will start wondering what you are up to and will start going with you. LOL
My ex was this way. I stopped looking to him for anything. I would swap kids with friends so one day I had a lot of kids at my house but one day i was free from kids. It was my time to do whatever I wanted. I would plan things as a family and say, “we’re going to … we would love for you to join us.” Men dont like being told what to do it reminds them too much of their mother. They like to be treated with respect which is asking, encouraging and letting them choose. It hurts if they don’t choose you and the kids but you can still do things and get time to yourself. I even hired babysitters. There were times he went and times he watched the kids but i pretty much could not look to him for anything. I learned to be happy no matter what he did.
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Stop trying to force him
You can’t change him
It’s you and your kids enjoy it
Find a new man. Move on. Don’t waist any more heart, life/time or energy.
On his day off walk in, hand him a kid, and leave. He will figure it out.
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You have already told him how you are feeling and he has not responded with action. I would be done.
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Is he the father or the baby daddy? Those are two very different things. If it’s the latter then I think you already know what you need to do.