My brother in law tried to sleep with me, help!

I visited my sister and her family. For the 2ns time in a row my brother in law has tried to sleep with me. My sister is deeply in love with him and this would devastate her. They have been together over a decade and he loves her. He was wasted both times. I'm in a very hard spot. Should I tell her or save her from the pain?
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That’s yours sister yes you tell her but best believe there is a chance she won’t believe you.

Personally I would have a conversation with both of them. Sit them down and explain the situation. Explain that when he is so intoxicated he tries to sleep with you and that you worry there may be an alcohol issue going on. I wouldn’t run to your sister and say it unless you do have proof because she may try and say your lying. Confronting him alone and asking what is going on is another option but also tell him you will be telling her. I think telling them both is mature and that way all parties are aware of what happen/ed because he may not even remember

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My brother in law tried to sleep with me, help!

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You need to tell her. That’s your sister.

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I would probably let her know! It’s not good keeping it from someone !

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I would definitely tell her, if it was my sister. I wouldn’t want to hurt her but I would definitely feel she deserves to know the truth about him…

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You tell her! Wasted or not wasted I’d want to know.

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If he is doing this towards you, her own sister, is he doing this to other women behind her back? I would tell her! Also, this wasn’t a first time, this was a second time- this is repetitive … this is a problem!

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Your loyalty lies with your sister. If hes trying to sleep with you hes definitely trying other people as well.

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Girl if you don’t tell her :face_with_raised_eyebrow: you’re in the wrong and if she finds out on her own best of luck​:yawning_face:

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That’s your sister, tell her!!

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Are you kidding? Absolutely tell her!

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Let her know and say he makes you feel uncomfortable

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You gotta tell her. How many times has he done this to others? How many times has he succeeded? She needs to know, plus if she finds out that you DIDN’T tell her that might hurt your relationship too.

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Save her the pain?

… ummm if hes trying to cheat… CONSTANTLY shes gonna be in pain… tell her

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I would tell my sister . He would be messing with other women 100% .

I would tell her 100% just be aware that it may not turn out the way you wish… been in a similar situation and they chose their partner over the truth… good luck xx

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Tell her and save both of you guys pain

If the shoe was on the other foot what would you do…

Thats your sister… TELL HER

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How does he love her but he’s willing to do something he knows would hurt his wife? Girl that’s your sister.

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Tell her and ask her to get tested for std incase he’s pulled this with other women

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You better tell her. That is your sister!! I can’t believe you even have to ask!! Maybe I just have a different relationship with my sisters than you do but you always tell your sister!

That’s your sister. That’s your answer

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Stay away from him when he’s drinking. If you tell her, it will ruin your relationship with her, an she will blame you.

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Shii best believe I will tell her Infront of him.

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You should have told her the first time

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I would tell her!! If he’s trying with you, he is likely trying with others too, and who knows what she may have seen…

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That is your sister, girl tell her!

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He loves her that’s a joke right?

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Well, coming from someone who has been through this, I’ve been the sister kept in the dark about a situation VERY similar to this one… my ex tried sleeping with my sister… she did not come to me, for over a year, and it’s now been 3 years since I found out, and im still devastated! She and I were close enough that she could have come to me with it, but she was in this same situation… do I tell her or do I keep it to myself!? TELL HER PLEASE!! She deserves to know that her husband can’t control himself, drunk or not it’s unacceptable!

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I would tell her, gently.

However, be prepared… she may end up staying with him and she may choose to distant herself from YOU.

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It’s your sister you already know you need to tell her

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People use acohal
for acuse but they know what
they are doing

Tell her that ain’t love. A man in love tried to sleep with his wife drunk not her sister

Don’t get in a drinking situation around him. If he did that to u, he probably does it to other women. sad

Tell her. Good God. If she finds out from someone other than u, it’ll look awfully Suspish for you. Don’t lose your sister over some loser

I would mention it and stress that he was drunk and probably mistaken. And just be like “keep an eye on him when he drinks, he might be blacking out and I’d hate for it to happen with someone who took it the wrong way.” That way she can bring it up if she chooses but at least you made her aware and didn’t keep it a secret.

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Tell her he might be sleeping with someone else and she needs to know he tried to with u

Maybe he thought you were your sister if he was wasted….?

You should tell her.

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Should have told her the first time…

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You should tell her chances are you’re not the first that he’s tried this with while under the influence :man_shrugging:

Wait til the SOB tries again, turn on your phone, video his rotten ass and then tell her.

You should tell her, wasted or not. Alcohol isn’t an excuse or free pass to disrespect his relationship. Any man worth a grain of salt who genuinely respects who he’s with wouldn’t ever cheat regardless if he’s sober or on his ass drunk. If he’s done it more than once, tell her. It’s as simple as “I wanted to tell you this because I thought you two should talk about it-“ and tell her he made moves to try and sleep with you more than once.

Loyalty goes to your sister but be prepared for backlash and her not believing you. All you can do is be supportive.

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Tell her but be prepared if your sister ends up hating you and blaming you and stay with that looser…I’ve been through it​:pensive::hushed:

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If you want to lose your sister tell her if she’s that much in love she will drop you like a hot potato

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I would 100% be blowing that dude’s world up and tell her. Being drunk is not an excuse to be a cheating prick.

Well, they say the truth comes out when you’re drunk or pissed off sooo :woman_shrugging: maybe he’s a sorry ass cheater anyway. Tell her!!!

Tell her but she mor Ethan likely will. Blame u but just Be honest

Get evidence if it happens again that way it’s not your word against his. Even sending him a text telling him how he acted inappropriately. His response might be all you need to prove it to her :woman_shrugging:t2:

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It’s weird to me that this is a real question lol. I’m sorry but A, wouldn’t you want to know? And B, it’s your SISTER!

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I can only imagine what he does when he’s out drunk :flushed:

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Tell her! If he does it to you knowing you’re her sister he will do it to a stranger and may succeed then it would just hurt her even more if she finds out tht he’s done it to you and you didn’t say anything

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I couldn’t imagine lying to my sister.

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Honestly goes a long way. But keep in mind she might not believe u. So if u can back it up with proof do that

Being wasted both times isn’t an excuse to do what he does

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Salina Bertin
Twice?

You should tell her! She’s your sister! If he’s trying to sleep with you, who else do you think he has slept with it is trying to sleep with? Being drunk is no excuse. And he does not love her. If he did, he wouldn’t be trying to sleep with other women. If you were my sister and my husband had tried to sleep with you not once, but twice, and you didn’t say anything to me and I later found out, my relationship with both my husband and you would be done!

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Hell yah I would tell her because if he is acting that way with you he is gor sure doing it with other women as well and she need to know what kind of a slime ball she is with and the longer she is with him the worse iy is going to get. Also if it happens again record him so she can see or hear for her self

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Leave the situation along. Your sister needs you dont put up a wall or make her choose between you are him.

Tell her, what are the chances he does the same thing to other women (and possibly succeeds) if he goes out and gets drunk at the bar?

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She probably won’t believe you if you told her and she would probably be mad at you for trying to destroy her marriage. Since he was wasted he probably doesn’t remember or will use that as a excuse to say it never happened. This could destroy you relationship with your sister as well. You may not be the only person he’s tried to sleep with. You should record him the next time he tries to sleep with you so you have prof. She still may blame you.

I’d have a private talk with him, when he’s sober. Let him know if it ever happens again… you’re going to tell her. I’d even stick my phone in my pocket and record the conversation.

Start out specifically asking if he remembers it, tell him how uncomfortable it made you and ask that it never happens again. :woman_shrugging:

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Well being on the other side of the coin….I had a good friend know about my ex cheating on me and I walked in and caught it so ya, a heads up would have been really nice….we didn’t speak for years because I was so hurt that she didn’t say anything

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My BIL did this to me as well. He stripped down to his nakedness and tried to push his body against me. My youngest at the time was at the crawling and grabbing stage, so after bbqs I would always clean up so I didn’t have to rush around in the morning to do it. I couldn’t even clean up cuz my BIL was being a dumbass. I actually told my husband, he didn’t take it serious enough. Not realizing the trauma it gas caused me (this isn’t the first time this has happened to me). Now, years later, my husband hates his brother, he hates what he did to me but feels like it’s to late now and there’s nothing he can do. Don’t hold it in. Tell the people you need to tell. It’s not right and he can’t think he got away with it.

You sister deserves to know.

Him being wasted is not an excuse. He knows. And he obviously keeps trying. What happens if next time he’s too forceful?

You have to tell her. I know it’s scary and thinking of how it could affect your relationship and caring for her feelings so much… but she has to know so she can make her own decision and she can be aware of what’s going on and how you are also feeling.

Fuck that guy. What a fucking asshole pig. Some people really don’t deserve shit.

I had one of my son’s friend’s dad message me when he was drunk at a concert and I ignored it, but he kept messaging me. I finally told him that if he didn’t stop that I would tell his wife. The next day he texted, called me frantically and even showed up at my house. I ignored him. A month later I ran into his wife and she confronted ME about it…I showed her his messages and told her she needed to keep a tighter leash on her husband…because I guarantee I wasn’t the first one he’s done that too. Somehow she saw me as the bad person.

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Tell him you plan to confront her about it as it’s happened twice, and it’s clearly a pattern of his behaviors when he’s around women other than her. Give him the opportunity, but make sure you’re sister knows your the one forcing it. Have text or some sort of evidence to back up your statements so it doesn’t blow up in your face. Prayers honey, that’s so hard. And so icky.

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I’ve been given hell for being rude so I’ll try to be nice. Your BIL is hardly in love with your wife. Hes a drunk pig. I would tell her or you’ll never be comfortable there and itll show. I’m sure shed rather know now.
It so hard not to shake your head sometimes at some situations

Tell her!!! If he’s doing it to you he’s doing it to others as well!!

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I was that sister…my ex husband tried sleeping with my little sister on numerous occasions. He even went as far as sending her texts…yes always when he was drunk. She came to me…guess what I amd more than thankful my sister told me! She is your SISTER and honestly (In my opinion) you aren’t any better if you don’t tell her!! She will thank you later…promise!!! He does NOT love her…I don’t care what ANYONE says!!!

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Bring it up as a drinking problem, and if he starts drinking leave.

I was in this position with my best friend … I waited 2 hours to inform her because I was terrified for her heart … after I told her she kicked me out and we haven’t talked since , it’s been almost 2 years , my father passed 2 days after and I needed her so badly and she wasn’t there for me , in the end I know I did what was right and what I would’ve wanted but she’ll always choose him no matter how many times it happens . She said I was lying and he would never do that to her , even though he cheated and got another girl pregnant a few months prior . I was just trying to be a good friend to her … it’s a very hard situation to be in especially if you care tremendously for the victim in the situation. I miss my best friend but I was trying to be a good one to her and she couldn’t accept it … prayers for you hun :heart::pray:t4:

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Definitely tell her! I had a sister who ended up doing things with my fiance and how I found out was through her baby daddy months later, he told her to tell me and that he would if she didnt so he did and now I no longer have a relationship with her anymore because her being my sister and doing that crossed the line, I’m still with my fiance cause we were able to work it out which he crossed the line for it as well but I can never forgive her and nor will I ever forget it. God forbid your sister found out through someone you told yes either way she will get upset or may not believe you but youd feel a lot better just telling her what he tried to do

I’d tell her. She might not believe you though.

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Tell her !!! Just think…. Are you the only one?? If he #1. Tries it w his own wife’s sister … AND #2. In his own home …. ! That is Horrible!! Chances are … you aren’t the only one.

That’s your sister how could you keep this away from her

Cnt blv u didn’t tell her the first time

Lrt her know asap… Up to her how she deals with it

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Tell your sister, things have a way of coming out eventually. And when they do you’ll look just as guilty if you don’t say anything. She’ll feel betrayed and most likely he will put the blame on you.

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I would definitely tell her

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I would’ve told my sister asap. Doesn’t matter if he was wasted or not…

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It’s best to tell you’ll make yourself sick my girl! Prayers shes understanding if she gets mad or defensive she knew hes like that. Hugs to you. I would even thou I dont like my sister I wouldn’t want it hid from me…

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Family first. Tell her: she’s your SISTER.

Tell her if he trying to sleep with you he’s already sleeping with others in my opinion

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I have 2 women in my life that i consider sisters. If either one of their husbands came at me i would say something. Anyone’s husband comes at me and I’m calling him out. If i were in that situation, i would want to know. Be prepared for her to be angry at first but surely she will come around.

Tell her omg!! I’d be more upset it wasn’t said :cry:

I have a similar situation but my best friend. Its hard because u want to but at the same time. Will she believe you? What if she doesn’t leave him? Then its going to be awkward af.

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Say something. I did and she blamed me… it happened again and I didn’t and when my sister died I regretted it. Cause no everytime I have to see him or there’s a event or party he tried to sleep with me. He goes oh well she’s desd

A drunk mans words are a sober mans thoughts!

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If it where me no hesitation I’d definitely tell my sister, it’s a respect thing. & I’d do it right in front of the pos. drunk or not he shouldn’t ever cross that line with you or any other women he’s a married man .

Tell her, help her fill out divorce papers, “he loves her” isn’t a thing

Should have told her the first time, now definitely tell her. I would be furious if you didn’t tell me.

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Yes. Tell her. He is a pig. If he tried with you. Just think how many other Women out there that is has had already or is having. His Ass needs to be kicked to the curb.

TELL HER LIKE YESTERDAY!!!
Drunk or not, especially being the second time is not an accident and he clearly does not love your sister. Also if you didn’t tell her the 1st time wtf, that was the first mistake along with being alone with him while drinking is another.

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You can try to tell her… but she might not believe you. …

Tell her. Drunk actions are true wants and needs without thought or fear of repercussions. It will happen again, if not with you then with someone else. What if he doesn’t listen to no next time? Protect yourself and protect your sister.

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The thing is if he is trying to sleep with you than he is most likely trying with other to and the fact that that is your sister and you would naturally say no but everybody’s not her sister and have or say yes so the fact that you know he is a cheater by not telling her you’re leaving her in harm’s Way of catching a disease…so there’s that…

I’d tell her because I’d want to know.

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