My childrens dad's girlfriend tells my kids they can't stay the night at their dads: Advice?

My kid’s dad and gf have a bad relationship from what I can tell. So last night, my kids were supposed to send the night with him so he could take them to school. He comes picks them up, and 20 mins later, he calls that he is bringing the kids back. So when my kids get home, they start telling me that his GF was a mean. And that’s why they couldn’t stay the night. And this happens a lot he’ll get them and then turns around and brings them back. I don’t want to keep my kids from their dad. But I Get frustrated cause they ask me why they can’t go. And also they just had a baby, and my daughter wanted to buy her new baby brother something, so we did. And last night his GF wouldn’t even take it Told my daughter that the baby has plenty. I mean, if she didn’t want, she could’ve still taken it and not hurt her feelings She was so excited to give him the things she picked out at the store. HELP


Controlling n jealousy issues sounds like ??


Aww that’s so sad I don’t even know what to suggest. Why as the gf got such an issue with the children staying and really dad needs to put his foot down and say my kids are staying put and not bow down and bring them home. Poor children and poor you for having to deal with the consequences sounds like you may need to step in and say if it carry’s on becos your hurting the kids and it’s confusing them you can have them but don’t agree to any over night stays until he sorts him self out. Have you maybe thought to speak to the gf and see if there is any reasons she reacts this way? Woman to woman sometimes works good luck hope you manage to sort it out

That is absolutely terrible. The dad needs to intervene, and let his girlfriend know that his kids come first. If she can’t accept them, then she needs to go. I would maybe have a heart to heart talk with dad about how her actions are hurting the kids.


Sounds like complete jealousy. How horrible to treat his children that way. He needs to step up and raise his voice for them, and let her know that they are still his kids reguardless and them not being able to spend the night is just ridiculous. My daughter recently told me that her dads 2nd wife was mean to them as well, shes lucky they are divorced now and my children dont have to deal with her anymore because I would have messaged her and told her how it is…


Sounds like the dad’s GF has some major control/jealousy issues. Unfortunately, your ex doesn’t have the backbone to put his foot down with her in regard to your children. You need to have a conversation with both of them because that’s hurting your kids. You as the mother cannot allow her emotional issues and insecurities effect your children’s psyche. Explain to your ex how it’s effecting his kids and the long term issues this could cause for them. Im sure he’s not going to want them thinking he chooses her over them but that’s what’s going to happen.


Omg. He needs to grow a pair and let her know it’s not acceptable to treat your kids like that. If he doesn’t then i would. I put my ex’s gf in her place more than once. She don’t have to like you but refuse to let her treat your kids like that.

sounds like the gf is hormonal and their home is not stable at this time, its better for the children not to stay if it causes a hostile environment. I would talk to their father about other arrangements, possibly taking them earlier in the day and out of the house to do an activity where the gf is not around. They still need their father, but the father and gf need to work out whatever issue she has with your kids being around.


Protect your kids and keep them away from that negative situation.


Unfortunately you don’t have a say so in what happens at their house. Until “dad” grows a pair, what she says goes. I wouldn’t want my kids over there with her acting like that.

Dad needs to stop being a little wussy and put his foot down, also a woman to woman just might be necessary. If not don’t let your kids over there. She obviously doesnt ike them and is already emotionally abusive to them


Sounds like this new chick needs a knot jerked in her tail…the man needs to actually be a man. If he allows his children to be treated so poorly by the new chick…he isn’t much of a man or a father.


Sit down and talk with them. Unfortunately they are a unit. And if she isnt willing to cooperate then sit him down and express your concerns cause honestly your childrens mental health is just as important as there physical health and this is wrong. She shouldnt be acting this way and he needs to step up and tell her. Her jealousy for your children isn’t healthy. If they cant change then momma you need to make a change for them. Maybe not have them stay and just have a few hours of just him with the kids.


First of all your kids come first. And yes his child with her too. But she should have known he had kids before she hooked up with him.So it sounds to me he’s letting her control him. He needs to MAN up!!!JS


It is a terrible situation. I will give him credit for bringing the children back home instead if keeping them in an obviously bad environment. Talk to dad and compromise on how the children can still spend time with him even if it’s not sleeping over.

1 Like

Bottom line what is important…

1 Like

Why send your kids someplace mean? Supervised visits until his shit gets together

Sounds like your going to have to “man up” and tell him he needs to man up and start acting like a real father. Children always come first. He needs to grow a backbone and tell his gf that your 2 children and the new baby are all equally important. And that she needs to start acting like it.


Tell him he better pick his priorities right!!! NO woman comes between a father and his kids… if shes a bitch like that he needs to wake the f up and realize obviously she isn’t the one for him. I cant stand a ugly bich for real. You know your dating a man with kids if you dont like the fact he has kids then move the f on these poor kids dont need to.put up with your jealous ass.


Sounds like he needs to reevaluate his relationship with that woman. If she cant accept that he had a family prior to getting together she needs to take a hike!


Beat her ass…that is my take on it. I have older kids (22, 21, and 20) but their dad went and got a young girl pregnant 2x and now they have a 3 yr old sister and a 1 yr old brother (and this girl named her son MY sons full name so now my ex who is the 3rd has a 21 yr old son who is the 4th and a 1 yr old son who is the 5th) and my kids never ever see the kids…I think some women just need a good beat down! Seriously though, the dad needs to GROW up!!!

It should never be like this! :sob:


Dad needs to grow a backbone. Speak to him, tell him how upset the kids are because his girlfriend is being spiteful and childish


I understand the importance of children spending time with both parents but it sounds like your ex’s home is toxic. That’s not good for your children. Sit down with your ex, just him, not him and his gf and explain this can’t continue. Try not to criticize the gf though she deserves criticism and condemnation. See if time can be arranged for just him and the children alone. Maybe he can take them to a movie, the park a ballgame…whatever… but you must protect your children from this woman’s spite.


Would you want them to be where they are not wanted??

That said… Keep them home if I were you.


Dad picked an immature jealous one. He should get out so he can spend quality time with his children.


What I’m not going to do is let someone traumatize my children. I would tell their father that I would love for him to see our kids, however they will not going to his home until things calm down. Let him know he can take them for the day and that they would like to spend some time with their new sibling. But the back and forth is not going to work. Its hurting those kids. Good luck, it’s a tough spot.

I’m sure in the divorce decree, visitation was addressed. Explain to Dad that that is a legal order, and he needs to live up to his obligation of seeing and taking the children. Also explain that IF the new woman can’t at least be pleasant to the children, you will be going back to court to get full custody (no visitation), and a raise of child support. You have to explain to him that his kids need HIM, in a kind, supportive, loving atmosphere, and YOU deserve to have that time too! I’m sure IF he had those kids 24/7, he wouldn’t have been able to meet his new spouse, YOU deserve time to be an adult too…


Wow - she sounds like a real witch and he sounds like he doesn’t set boundaries smh

1 Like

Sound like dad needs to man up grab his balls and put his foot down let his girl know his kids come first before her ALWAYS !!!


Confront her. That’s your children stand up for them mama!


I would say have a sit down with the gf & the father of your child and everyone voice your concerns and reasons why your children are treated that way. Come to a agreement or arrangement. No matter what the kids will need their father and either everyone learn to get along or you pull ultimatum on him. Honestly he should’ve put his foot down the min she wouldn’t allow your kids to stay there or when she wouldn’t take the gifts. They are his kids as well so for him to allow that I would be furious.


Omg! He puts Her before HIS KIDS!!???

Children should ALWAYS COME FIRST NO MATTER WHAT. If she can’t except that then what kind of a person is she especially being a mother herself. That’s sad. I’d tell him either be a part of your kids life or don’t. Kids shouldn’t have to feel unwanted ever. That’s to bad.


She is mean. Dad should do something about that. His kids!!!


I would confront the gf and let her know that if she disrespects or is mean to your children again, serious consequences will happen. No I would not let my children be around her as this could escalate into something extremely harmful to your children. So I would tell their father if your children are not welcome in his home, then he needs to stay at a relative’s house with them or a motel. Why he would even tolerate this is beyond me. And doesn’t he think that if he abides by her behavior and not to see his children that she won’t continuously throw it up in his face??? How awful for your children to feel as if they aren’t good enough.

I would be at her door if I were u … And see what the problem is with ur kids . Then honestly I kick her ass for being the bitch she is … and him well it explains it all he is a excuse my language but a pussy for not saying anything to her or sticking up for his kids…

Sounds like gf needs to be put in her place and to mind her mf business ur kids were here first and she needs to stay in her own lane gf Problaly using there babu as a tool problaly saying well if u want to see ur baby type shit

Listen Stop letting them Kids around that. Toxic Behavior as aman and their father his ass have to speak up. And put her in place Because at the end of the Day He is is their father and if he. Dont stop letting them kids see this shit they going to always think it is their. Father and the way shit set up now God will send u warning signs My Daughter went through the same thing. She sixteen and. She remembers everything so Dont force them on him and watch out for that helifer my baby was 8. They will remember it all

This sounds a little familiar

Sounds to me like your ex needs to grow some balls


Dump the GF. Nobody should come between a Dad and his kids.


Oh heck no we would have to have a come to Jesus meeting!!


Does he live with his girlfriend? They not married ? U can also maybe have father come and visit kids at ur house maybe talk through it but gf isnt entitled to interfere with his visits either

This is awful :frowning: your kids should be able to stay with there dad. This woman’s being unfair to your ex he deserves to see his own children and have them stay as I know some dad’s only see there kids weekends etc so he might not have that much time with them. As for her not letting your little one gift the new baby a little something I think that’s so out of order… Your ex needs to have a talk with her and like now…


Ok. Don’t hate me. But is this the gf’s first baby? NOT that it’s an excuse why he won’t take his kids…BUT - is she going through post partum? Is she overwhelmed?? Is she freaking out bc she feels she can’t handle all the kids?? I have five of my own. And went through terrible post partum after my first. I would talk to your ex. See what’s going on. She might not be “mean” but overwhelmed and terrified. Does she need help? Does she have a support system? Idk what’s going on with the present thing. That’s odd. That could have been handled differently. I hate that everyone thinks that they need to hate the “new” gf/bf. It takes a village. I value my ex’s gf. She doesn’t have children and took mine in like a champ. She’s amazing and the girls love her, but she does get overwhelmed and flounders some times. But hey- she’s trying!! Talk with ex first. Maybe he’s caught in the crossfire too. Then talk to new gf or both together.

At least you know now. I would keep them away from her before she could possibly harm them!!

No one should come between a parent and their child. If the woman has such a problem with it, then maybe she should leave and the father DEFINITELY should have been setting her straight about this. Just because she may have some sort of issue with whatever, doesnt mean yhe kids should suffer. How ridiculous.

Sounds like she doesn’t want the package deal only him. Dump the bitch!!! The kids deserve so much more!


Don’t be available when he wants to bring them back.

GF sounds immature and way outta line smh​:cry::pray:t2::pray:t2::pray:t2::pray:t2:

How fucking rude! That poor little girl :cry: i have an older daughter(much older) and she buys stuff for her younger siblings all the time my husband has NEVER been upset about this. He’s also NEVER treated her as if she wasnt his own

Immature gf. Your ex needs to grow a pair and set this bitch straight. If not only see them at your house or outings. Kids shouldnt be treated this way. Hateful hoe she is.

1 Like

Clearly this woman has issues. Back off and let it be what it is. It will not last. If he is a real man he won’t allow her to keep him from his kids but u cant change it fighting with her is simply a waste of your time. Let her cook her own goose. She will


Well the problem here is the father of the child, for some reason he can’t fix his problems with the new girlfriend, talk to him and give him some time and explain him how you kids feel about it and that he is bringing to the kids problem that have nothing to do with them… for now just keep the kids with you and tell the father that he can see them whenever he wants and talk with your kids too… if by any chance try to talk with the girlfriend, make her understand that you guys are together in this family and there’s no reason for hostility with the children

I never let my kids go anywhere that they are being mistreated if there dad wants be in there life he better put them first or sorry for him he gets see them at park or Macdonald without her.feel sry for the new baby .protect yours

Me perpersonally I’d beat her ass don’t mess with my kids

I wouldn’t bother trying to sit down and talk with them just yet, it’ll turn into a you against them situation. Next time he calls wanting to see them, break it down to him. Tell him to get his girl in check, that you won’t stand for they’re treatment of your kids. And yes it’s both of them, he’s allowing and going along with it so it’s just as much him as her. Let it be known that until you know you’re kids are coming to a non hostile and loving environment where his GF treats them with care if not affection, that he won’t be seeing his kids unless it’s in your home. All the back and forth and harsh treatment isn’t good for your children. You have to be their protection in this as well as everything else.

Well time to fix for custodial amendment or contempt. Fck it. Not worth kids being hurt for her sht. It’s one thing if she’s worried about new baby and sleep and such, but being a mean arse isn’t acceptable. The court won’t smile kindly on a dad with kids having a new baby with a gf, no commitment, and her getting to play such a large role in their parenting time.

1 Like

Let the kids go. But if he calls soon after don’t answer the phone and turn out your lights. See ya tomarrow

1 Like

This woman probably have trust issues
And you’re ex is wearing a skirt instead of pants
I think you are the only matured one here!
You can set him a ultimate and suggest a conversation with the 3 of you ( no kids) as final offer
Don’t that woman also want you to move on :woman_shrugging:t2::kissing_heart:

Don’t make them go. Tell the kids they can go when the gf decides to act better. Uuugghh.

My ex’ s gf was the same way and treated my kids like crap it got to a point when my daughter who was 15 at the time went to his house (he lives about 100 miles away ) I was going on vacation to Vegas and he insisted I leave her with him and just as I got to there he calls me and wants me to pick her up because since they both work and didn’t trust to stay home while they there at work and she refused to go to the gf mothers house where she didn’t feel comfortable . Thank god I had family living in same area my aunt picked her up and my daughter never went back . Why these men get these insecure women it’s like you knew he had kids .

Karma will get them both .

My kids experienced the same jealously from several of their dads girlfriends…toxic women are horrible to their bf kids, see them as a threat bc they r an extension of you… dad needs to smarten up and dump her…

She has absolutely no say in your guys co parent relationship. Especially if you guys have a parenting plan. She needs to get off her high horse and back off. You and your kids will be in his life forever, and she needs to accept that. He also needs to stand up to her and explain to her that if she can’t be civil with you and nice to your children, she will be leaving. I wouldn’t put up with that bull if I was him.

1 Like

That’s wrong. Is dad a Dick or what?.I’d kill to see my daughter’s.

Sounds like you need to talk to their father.

Unfortunately the kids dad allows the behavior, until he puts a stop to the GF’s behavior, not sure what you can do.

1 Like

if dad and gf have a bad relationship, maybe it’s better that the kids don’t stay the night?

1 Like

Your ex’s girlfriend is obviously jealous of your kids getting any attention from their father. In her mind, all of his attention should be going towards her. Her behavior will only get worse over time. As long as your ex continues to allow his girlfriend to control the relationship he has with your kids, the time he does spend with them will become shorter and further apart. I wouldn’t doubt it if she gets jealous of her own baby when it is born, if he shows the baby more attention than her. Your ex needs to grow a pair and stand up for your kids! I personally would fight to terminate his parental rights due to the fact that he has obviously chosen his girlfriend over his kids. She could even be a threat to your kids. The resentment she feels toward your kids is a big red flag! It is very strange for an adult to behave like this. It is equally as strange for a father to allow anyone to tell him what he can and cat do with his children.


Don’t let them go anymore and if the father wants to spend time with them, meet somewhere public where the kids can have fun and if he don’t show, the kids still had fun. Make a schedule and stick to it. Start keeping track of when he shows and doesn’t show. It’s similar to what I made the father of my children do for the first six months he finally came back into their lives after five and a half years of being gone. Don’t tell the kids he’s coming in case he don’t show, make it like a surprise if he can’t be consistent

dad needs to grow a pair… kids from a previous marriage ALWAYS comes first… ask a judge…


Sounds like gf needs an ass beating to know her place.


Their dad needs to grow a pair and sort his GF out … he needs to stick up for his kids. What a weak SOB he is


I’d smack the shit out of them both to be honest. I’d tell her to treat my children before I bury her and tell him he won’t be seeing them at all if he can’t treat them with respect and choose them over his bitch. Period. End of discussion.

She sounds like a winner…maybe your kids dad can arrange dates with your children without her. It may not be a bad idea to not spend the night in a home where they are made to feel unwelcome. She also might be experiencing post partum depression or blues if her poor behavior started after her baby was born.


Have you gone to court?
Hmmm… If so follow the court order if he doesn’t want the kids welcome them home and show them you care. If it continues document it.


You need to put that Bitch in her place and set her straight


Girl friend is a Witch & Dad needs to stand up to her!!!


Get dad to take your kids away for the weekend he has them she’s a nasty jealous woman dad needs to grow up at put this right


Your children have the right to be with thier dad.and all you have to.domis when your husband brings back like he’s been doing.u.putnyour foot down and.u say straight.out.if you want to have visitation rights to your children then this has to stop his gf has no reason for sending them home this kids also have the seem there dad.if it.keeps up u.may.have to seek legal counsel good luck

Sadly my kids dad puts my kids last with his gf too. Just support them as needed. They will work it out eventually and it will be his loss. So heartbreaking though.

I’d have a quick conversation with the girlfriend to see what the fuck her deal is… first talk to the father about what her deal is and to have a conversation with her about how she’s mistreating the kids. If it continues after that… I’d be paying a visit to their home and have a conversation with her about how she’s treating your children. I wouldn’t be ok with them spending the night… he would have to visit and spend time without his evil Bitch girlfriend. I hate women like that.

Sounds best to keep them away from his GF even if he don’t see them or have him come alone for visits

1 Like

Sounds like she hates his and your kids and from what im getting is that she feels VERY insecure e.g probably things that thr kids will try to brake them up and try to get you and him together. Witch is probably not the case , but in saying that I would talk to him about it and probably all of yous e.g him his GF you and the kids seek help like go to a professional therapist to let EVERYONE KNOW that this is whats happening to the kids and how their being affected and that everyone needs to work as one its just an extended family

You need to have a serious talk with their dad about the way his girlfriend is treating your kids and if he doesn’t see anything wrong or come up with a plan to make it change you need to protect your kids. If the girlfriend tries to say anything about your decision to protect your kids from her and their moron dad explain to her she’s going to be the next ex and he’s going to do the same stuff to her kid because you’re no better than me and your kid is no better than mine so get ready. You must protect your kids feelings that is your job.

1 Like

Dad need to stand up to his girlfriend. The kids were there way before her. !!! People can be so cruel


Sounds like he picked a real winner!:joy:

1 Like

I had a hateful dad gf… thankful they did not have children together. Downside was he wanted a long 8-10 yrs. W her!

Why do keep taking your kids thru this is my question to you! Fuck him! He sounds weak af!

There has to be a reason why she dosnt want them there . Maybe they dont behave or she caught them trying to do something to the baby you cant judge until you know both sides

1 Like

I’ve always said that new gf will pull the nastiest crap on a bf’s kids…this is one. She’s mean to keep the kids from being there so their father finally gives up going to get them and hoping the new baby keeps him home and forgets the other children. Reason you ask? She’s insecure in their relationship (got pregnant too soon also) and thinks he may get back with mom when she’s hurting her relationship and HIS KIDS. She’ll be the one who keeps their kid from him if he doesn’t do what she says! Explain to your kids that the dad and gf are missing out on how wonderful those kids are and that he has things to figure out in the meantime. TALK TO DAD WITHOUT KIDS and set him straight on this BS he’s doing to them. He can grow a backbone and keep the kids overnight, spend time with them and set gf straight that she has him all week and needs to learn to share. Good Luck, it’s still a bumpy road with this gf but she needs to grow up.

Dad has to put current family as priority. Theres more to the story then what Mom knows. All she knows is what her kids tell her. My husband puts me and my children first. Thats how it should be. My kids father puts his gf and his oldest son first. I have no issues with it.

For this exact reason my ex ended his relationship, he said his kids come first and if the woman in his life have issues with them then he rather be single…(two daughters) he’s in another relationship now and the kids seem to get along very well with his GF and her kids…

sounds like a case of cuntasaurus. If your ex doesnt have the balls to take action then you should. Protect your children at all costs.

Oh I’d be saying something. She’s a side bitch the kids are the main priority. He needs to step up or step out.

So sad!!! I’d have a serious talk with their father and if this new gf can’t accept his children then she shouldn’t be with their father.


Evidently they aren’t part of the package only your ex I hope he opens his eyes


Tell dad to grow a pair