My daughter doesn't have a relationship with her dad: Advice?

I’m a single parent; the father has never been involved. All he does is pay child support but does nothing for a physical relationship with his daughter. My daughter now five and is going around saying her dad is dead. I have corrected her and said no, he’s not. He is still alive. She is continually saying he’s dead, not just to me but now to my parents(grandparents), and even asked my dad if he can be her daddy. I did tell them I had already corrected her regarding this as it’s not the first she’s said it. But I’m not sure if this is just her way of coping with not having one? An I’m not sure what more I can do. She already has pretty bad anxiety and depression due to COVID, which she’s currently getting help for. I just don’t know what more I can do or if I should even continue to correct it as if it’s her way of coping with it. Maybe that’s better. Any advice would be appreciated. I know it’s a touchy subject for many.


I’d just let her go she’ll understand when she gets older


Honestly, it’s not like she’s hurting the feelings of someone who doesn’t exist. :woman_shrugging:t4: You at least have tried to teach otherwise but maybe it’s her unique harmless way of coping without him right now.


Its a way of coping or maybe what she really thinks. For the longest time my son thought his dad was dead because he never came around. It sucked when he figured out his dad is just a piece of shit.

That’s her way of coping with it. He is dead to her in a sense.


She’s making sense of her life and the world around her. I’m in a similar situation, except he doesn’t pay child support, and I just acknowledge her feelings and allow her to speak about if she’s sad or mad. I ask her how she feels about her dad and I console her. That’s all we can do, really.

Let her i didn’t have either parents just my grandpa n I’ve never claimed my mother or father people ask i either day idk where there at or there dead

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Maybe record her saying it and send it to him. And if he still doesn’t do anything about it, stop correcting her. She has found away to cope with not having a dad, and is trying to fill her void with her grandpa.


Honestly depending on the situation sometimes it’s better not having a parent involved

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I’d bring it up to whoever she is seeing for the other stuff. They could potentially have some incite into this.

My daughter father has been out of her life for 7 years now and calls her maybe once every 3 months. She is not almost 14 and decided that she doesn’t really want to talk to him and says my boyfriend is more of a dad than her dad has ever been. I told her it’s her decision to talk to him or not I always let my children learn and see for themselves and she has made up her mind.

As a child whose father was not around, and not do to anything he caused, I feel like this is her way of coping with it. Kind of like, their relationship is dead and so maybe to her it is like he is dead and that is how she is dealing with it right now…
You have done right and corrected her and maybe when shes older she will be able to explain why she felt that way and dealt with ot that way. And I would say if she wants your dad to be her dad, let that relationship unfold. Many hugs to both of you

My daughter is 8 and when she was 3 her dad walked out on her and moved out of state. He never asks me about her and he does pay child support. She use to talk about him all the time but now she don’t. Over a year ago at school she told some friends her dad tried to kill her once when she was a baby and another time when she was 5. This never happened but I guess that’s how she was trying to cope with him being gone. My daughter also is on his insurance and now I have co pays everytime she goes to the doctor and I told her dad about it so he can pay it and he had the nerve to tell me to send my daughter to him. She don’t know him. I would like to get his rights terminated but he refuses to give up his rights and I have no idea why since he has nothing to do with her. I’m sorry ur child is going through this but kids have ways of coping with abandonment. My daughter had to go into counseling because she would take her anger out on me and started to hit and kick me. She doesn’t do any of that no more. I hope things get better for u. Sorry about the long comment but I can totally relate to exactly what ur saying and I don’t ever get to talk about it.

My daugther is 8 an her dad walked away from her when she started walking she knows who her dad is an where he lives he’s a waste of air she doesn’t want to know him I not gogin to make her I would refer to my ex as dead an long gone

I’d let it be. She knows the truth, but this is easier for her. We had the same situation and my daughter had to deal with kids telling her “your daddy doesn’t love you”. Kids are cruel.

My son is three and his father hasn’t seen him since he was 4 months old. He isn’t in contact with us at all which I’m thankful for as he is not a good person and my son is better off not having him around at all. He too tells his friends at daycare as well as family members that his dad is dead. I used to correct him and say no he is just far far away but now I don’t even do that anymore. I know when he’s a lil older we will hafta have a tough conversation but until that day comes I’m just gonna let him say whatever he feels.

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She has depression and anxiety due to covid, at AGE 5? Wtheck

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Sounds like she’s heard this from somewhere and is repeating it. It’s hard to make judgments on these situations with only one side of the story.

Growing up my father wasnt there still isnt and I referred to him as dead I would just leave it