My 6 year old daughters dad moved last week and he hasn’t called / texted once to see how she doing or even to talk to her. She was such a mess when he left which he knew since he saw her the night he left and she was in tears. She wouldnt leave her room all weekend besides coming out to eat. She won’t sleep by herself anymore. She’s having nightmares. Having pee accidents. Won’t let me leave without her . Wouldn’t even play with her little sister which is not like her at all. my ex’s mother called to her talk last night and my daughter didn’t even want anything to do with her and she texted me afterwards asking me why she’s acting this way and I was like she’s been like this for a couple of days. if I bring up something that has to do with her son she will lash out at me so I didn’t say anything else.
The poor child is traumatized by this experience. I’d say your daughter is reacting normal to the situation. I’d tell your MIL shes been like that since “her dad” left. Don’t use the words “your son”
And just let your daughter know she is loved and this is definitely in no way her fault.
Send dad a text that his daughters feelings and psyche
are very hurt and confused and that he eventually will have to see her and start making your divorce a more normal thing in her life. 2 households 2 lives. My heart breaks for her
I don’t think it would be negative to tell your ex mil that your daughter misses her dad. That’s the opposite of something bad to say. That’s saying a little girl loves her dad.
Call him!!! Why let this torture your 6 yr old child. If you have to be the bigger person in this situation and make him talk to her everyday then so fkn be it.
Call him and let him know what’s going on. Ask him when he’s available to talk. Ask him to call her. Don’t let her know that you called him. Do this for her not him. How far did he move? Ask if he can meet in the middle for lunch.
No! Screw that. Say something maybe she can talk to her son. I’ve been through this exact thing with my little girl (same age) well she just turned 7 and it’s unbearable to watch our babies be so upset over something we have absolutely no control over. Her dad don’t live more than 2 minutes away so circumstances are different but I typically just try to occupy her mind by doing something else like the park or watching a movie or something.
He knows that he has a child and he knows that he walked out on that child. It’s not your responsibility to enforce a relationship between him and his child.
Redirect her. Do things she enjoys to distract her. This is what I did when my ex-husband and I separated. Our daughter was 3 and she did not understand why he wasn’t coming around or calling her. We would watch her favorite shows and movies. Play her favorite games. When she would ask about him, I would say things like “I don’t know baby, maybe Daddy is at work. Do you wanna go get some ice cream? ” or “I’m not sure, Daddy might be sick, do you wanna make some cookies?” It helped take her mind off it.
As far as his mother goes, that’s the POS that she raised. Don’t sugar coat anything for her. She wants to know what’s wrong with that baby, it’s simple “your son walked out on her and has made zero attempt to call or see her. She’s devastated.” Let his mother try to make up excuses as to why he can’t be a father because there are ZERO excuses as to why someone cannot be a parent.
In the mean time, remember that this is a huge change in her little world. Check into therapy for her. It may help. And if he stays gone, never bad mouth him to her or in front of her, eventually she will understand on her own.
You don’t need to talk to your ex’s mom honestly and if she wants the truth on why your daughter is acting the way she’s acting then be blunt and tell her the truth and when she starts lashing out hang up on her. It’s not your fault nor your daughters fault that this woman raised a lousy son in the end. Just reassure your daughter that she’s safe with you and that you’ll never ever leave her and it’s okay to let her sleep with you for now. Try finding a fun activity for the children to do together but you also should participate too in the activities. Get her in therapy if u need to. Tell her to draw out the nightmares and her feelings etc. give her toys that you’re okay with breaking and tell her to show you with the toys how she’s feeling. But with your ex’s mom just cut contact for now she doesn’t need to be involved right now especially if she’s going to be toxic when you communicate what’s really going on. Stand up for your children when it comes to this man and his mother and don’t let them make you feel bad for communicating either
She’ll be fine eventually! It’s only been a week. Don’t talk about him to her, is it her or you that wants contact. He made his choice, obviously he don’t want to be a dad. DO NOT PLAY THAT BACK AND FORTH DADDY GAME!!! CUT OFF CONTACT UNLESS HE MAKES THE MOVE. Keep her occupied. Do not contact his family…they sound toxic…but I am sure your no Angel…focus on her not them!!!
Who would want. A man? That would do this to his child I know I would not
She’s scared your going to leave her as well poor little girl you can only reasure her that you not going anywhere and that you love her xx
Call him so she can talk to him.
Awww sweet girl. 
I think this calls for a conversation, if you havent already…at the very least, starting with her mama, where the reason dad left is explained as there’s nothing she did wrong, and that it’s OK to not be ok. It’s OK to be upset. Shes grieving a loss of what she’s always known. But also remind her that you girls need to stick together, and that you’ll get through this transition together. I’d also call her father, explain her behavior, and see if he’s willing to do to help address and mitigate the emotional damage, and help fix it. Preferably, a chat with her directly, face to face. A phone call on this one isn’t going to cut it or mean anything.
Her whole life as she knew it is now upside down and what she has always known is now gone. Of course she’s upset. Expecting her to remain the same and have no reaction to dad not being an active part of her daily life is insane. The best therapy she can get allowing her the space to be honest and talk about it. Talk about how she’s feeling and teach her that emotions are normal. At 6 years old, she likely doesn’t have the skills necessary to cope with this kind of trauma. Let her know she’s not alone, nor abandoned. While dad may not be there daily, he does need to and should still WANT to step up and still be active in her life. And that includes having the hard conversations and being attentive to his children and what they’re going through. Just because mom and dad’s relationship went to crap doesn’t mean the rest of the familial relationships should cease. He needs to recognize as a father that she still needs him, and both of you, to be able to help navigate her through this change. What you two do now and how you handle this will dictate and direct so much more down the road as to her emotional well being. Be proactive. If he isn’t on board, you can’t force him, but that’s a different conversation. But commit to at least talking to him about it, and letting him choose from there. Whatever he decides, she’s gonna need you in her corner regardless.
I think you guys steal posts from real community pages.
Honestly Ive learned through expirence when people know their actions affect you emotionally they feel that they have power over you. They enjoy that. So tell your daughter she tell you anything & you will try to help her but not to show her emotions to her father or his mother. It’ll just get worse if they know his selfishness is hurting her.
Forget him. She’ll adjust without him. Just keep telling her how wonderful she is. When she mentions her dad tell her the truth. He’s choosing to be selfish. It’s not about her it’s him not being mature enough to put a child above himself.
Why does men do this? Poor baby.
No feelings are spayed when it comes to my kid. Tell about her raggedy @$$ son.
Although I think the dad is a pos for not reaching out to his child, I think you need to be the bigger person in this situation for your child’s well being.
I don’t think you should try to convince/force him get in contact with his kid but at least inform him of the state of mind of his kid since he left. Put the facts out there for him to act and hopefully call.
Now, if he doesn’t or if you need to convince or force him, that’s an other story. That would mean he’s even more of a pos. And no kids need that in their life.
As for the ex’s mother, don’t block her from speaking to her grand kids but don’t accept to be disrespected. If she lashes out at you, calmly state that you will hang up and will speak again when she is ready to talk in a respectful way.