Let that man watch porn
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Pornography ruins intimacy and destroys relationships. Period. Transparency is essential in any relationship. The fact your husband is a liar is a product of the behavior. What else is he lying about? There are therapists that specialize in porn and sex addiction - born out of this widespread problem. I suggest you and your husband seek help from a specialist. I’ve seen many families torn apart over this problem. It will take an investment on both your parts.
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Stop telling her theres nothing wrong and stop telling her she should be okay with it, obviously shes uncomfortable with it and they both said they werent gonna watch it and they both have this religion, his watching porn is conflicting with their marriage its an obvious issue…nevermind the statistics on how it negatively impacts a marriage, it makes a lot of women and men feel like they arent enough, and causes many insecurities, which is normal, stop acting like she should be cool with it, she doesnt have to be. And to the person who said it isnt adultry, IT ACTUALLY IS, pick up a bible. It causes so many issues and it is one of the leading causes of divorce because it has been proven to encourage infidelity. So stop. Remember its BOTH their religious beliefs. Regardless he hid that. What else will he hide? Counseling. But next time she shouldnt put it on a public forum because people hate religion apparently and nobody is allowed to expect honesty and fidelity anymore.
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Wiping your own ass is against your religion. And I’m sure you mix your fabrics. And dont just spend all day Sunday in quiet prayer. Maybe grow up and drop the religion bullshit and admit you’re not comfortable with just porn. 
Watch it with him! I never got upset with my husband watching porn, I watched it with him.
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… Umm…
Nope… Not doing it.
Good luck.
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You cannot expect one person to 100% fill ALL your sexual needs. Sometimes one needs self release, sometimes one person just isn’t in the mood, sometimes one is never in the mood or actually ever does something the other person really likes. Unless he is paying for the stuff just let the man rub one out once n awhile.
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Sweetheart, you chose the wrong group to seek advice. To many dumb questions and statements here. God forgives sins? And Its a sin to watch people have sex… if you have to explain this to them 1st, just delete the post and seek guidance from people who know God and His word. Don’t waste ur time here. God bless
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Wow so many judgemental woman on here. It’s absolutely disgusting. I do not know about any of you but i do not condone lying in a marriage. I can see how your feelings are hurt . Everyone approaches marriage different and if this is something in your marriage you agreed was not appropriate he should not have done it. All these internet warriors saying you are not fulfilling his sexual needs need to get a grip.
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Ok. 1. DO NOT listen to anyone that is going to tell you that you need to “stop being a prude” or “do it with him, what’s the big deal”. You and your husband spoke about this, and came to the same conclusion about it. Do not give up your beliefs. 2. You need to continue to honor God with your decisions. You both made a covenant. And your job, as his wife, is to pray. Help him guard his heart. The same way that he guards yours. 3. If he admitted it, and is willing to get help, then you need to be willing to meet him there. He is your husband. Yes, it was a betrayal, but you CAN have a fully restored marriage, he can be set free, and you will have an amazing testimony from it. But You have to be ready to fight for your marriage.
4. The only way your marriage is going to survive this is if you recognize that it is you two against the problem, not against each other. John 10:10, Ephesians 6:12. Praying for you!!
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I’ve never heard of a religion against porn 
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Me personally I’d rather my man watch porn than out there cheating on me. I know you’re against it, but try watching with him.
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Im a Christian, but im not overly religious if you get my drift. ive been to some laid back churches. Ive been taught God loves all of us no matter what our flaws are. WE ALL HAVE FLAWS no one is perfect and no one is better than the next person! Try to think of the positive, hes not running around having sex with other women!
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Sounds like it’s just you that has the view that porn is wrong. And although,I don’t condone lying, I can kind of understand why he would want to avoid your judgement and in turn lie to you. On a side note… I like porn, I watch it by myself and I watch it with my hubs of 21 years… how exactly is it against your religion?
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I think you would be better served to seek advice from a group who shares your beliefs. 
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I don’t care for porn. My ex was addicted to it. Once I asked a nurse if he could possibly hurt himself because he does it so often. We were married for 12 years and the last 8 years he only had sex alone. He would get irate over react if I talked about it… a horrible existence.
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Those of you saying there is nothing wrong with it ? If it makes her feel insecure - there is something wrong with it .I have watched it with my husband and am ok with that ,however there have been times when he watches it alone or I feel like instead of being with me - I’m very hurt by it .
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But sex before marriage is just dandy 
you come across as a jealous wife not a zealot
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Wtf is wrong with most of you in this group? She’s asking for advice and you’re talking shit, making fun of and telling her to get over it?! Wtf is that? Not support that’s for sure!! If you’re not going to help her then just move the hell along ffs!!
If he is doing that then he will
Cheat on you soner.or later open
Is just sick
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Sit down watch it with him maybe it will help you loosen up a little. Be happy he was beating his meat and not out giving it to someone else.
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The man don’t love his wife or.
He Would not be doing that to
Her
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There’s nothing wrong with porn. He shouldn’t be ashamed and you should not shame him. There’s no shame in masturbating. It doesn’t make you less pretty, smart, less of a woman or undesirable if your husband masturbates. He just wants to shake his own hand. Sometimes we all need that.
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Rather than bash religion I am going to try and give some advice. You both are Christian and one of the pillars of that faith is forgiveness. It is ok to be hurt. He feels shameful about it, you goal as a couple should be to get through this and any rough patches together in the hope of bringing you both closer to one another and to God. The very faith that has been betrayed ( as you both feel hurt and shameful) is the same faith…in one another and your morals that will help heal you, him, and your marriage with the right work, transparency, and support. If it is that important that you both feel strongly about it, it matters. But judgement as you know, as a Christian is not in our hands. As his loving wife (you said you love him so much), you should feel hurt yes, but be grateful that he is being honest and open about it, making you both able to communicate about how you are both feeling. Hope this helps in any way.
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While I may not share the same religious and porn views as you, I do respect them and I’m sorry you were mislead and lied to by your husband.
Unfortunately this is the wrong group to seek advice; as you can see by the comments. Perhaps a religious based group might be better.
My heart goes out to you.
Good Luck. 
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Is this for real 
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Ditch the religion and watch the porn together!
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I’m sorry to say this but you can’t build a relationship without trust. It sounds like it’s time to give him the boot. He has admitted that he lies about things. You cannot trust him.
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In no way do you need to be ok with him getting off on porn. Everyone saying well he’s a man it’s what men do. No it’s what horny teenage boys do. He’s a grown man still getting off on other women in videos. It’s ridiculous to think we as women just have to accept it just because, they are men and they need it. No we don’t and no they don’t. Women think if they are ok with their man watching porn he’s not gonna cheat? Really? Porn equals no cheating? Get real people. I get what the problem is and what it could bring, porn is meant to deviate from reality and sometimes it can make you feel insecure because frankly he’s getting off on someone that’s not you his wife and he’s thinking of other people not you his wife. It’s not controlling because you’re not comfortable with him whacking it off to the image of other women. It’s ok to want your husband to be primarily attracted to you because it’s a vow and dedication you two make each day being married. Maybe other people get off on watching porn together, maybe women settle and are ok with their men doing it because they are so afraid he’ll walk away if he can’t watch other naked chicks do other men or animals whatever they are into. Maybe some women just don’t care and that’s their prerogative. That’s them but you, you have a problem with it and it’s completely valid. I guess with the logic well men do it because they need to and their men so do women just need to stick to cooking cleaning because woman? No. I’ve never ran into a stand up classy dude that still gets off on porn on the daily. They need the douche jar like in the new girl and put money into anytime they start acting like a douche. These are the guys who bs at work and check out other women, disrespect them and wish their wife looked like that. Why women think that’s just cool as heck and we have to suck it up idk. This whole idea well he still comes home to me, he still good to me. Ugh. Yeah while he wishes you were a size 0 with Pamela Anderson tits, great man. My point is the only way you can get through this is communication. Communicating why he finds it necessary to watch it? Is there a romance problem? Trust problem? I mean communication is important. You’re hurt and you’re entitled to be hurt because he lied, and when someone you do trust whole heartedly breaks that trust it will hurt, no matter what it was that hurt you. I would ask maybe what makes him feel tempted to watch? Why is it absolutely necessary? Is it making him a better man and happy? Simply saying uh because I have a penis is not a valid excuse. I’m sorry but this he’s man let him crap is overrated. Your marriage can work if you express your pain to him and not shame him for it. Other wise he might not be willing to open up to you as much, if you just listen and communicate I guarantee you can work it out. Read scriptures together, pray together and see how that might change things, maybe strengthen your relationship with God on your own and as a couple.
Here’s what I can tell it’s an addiction and it’s not you or your body and yeah it does affect your sex life a great deal the fact he wants to quit is awesome and the best part is he quit lying to you which means that he is coming to terms with the fact that he has a problem and I have met meth addicts who love Jesus but they had to have their fix you can’t fix him but what you can do is help him with stress like most addiction’s stress is a HUGE trigger and don’t obsess over it it not worth your energy or the heart break I Know you feel betrayed but if you’re not leaving him don’t make him miserable it’s just going to fuel his addiction and your bitterness I write to God when things get rough like actually sit down and write him a letter I find doing so helps me get to the root of my pain
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I’m so sorry that you’re facing this. it’s refreshing to hear someone has convictions about pornography and the dangers associated with an addiction. counseling is the right step for sure. there is nothing you can do or say, it is ultimately his battle and his choice. it is not your fault, so don’t end up blaming yourself for this. stay true to your faith and encourage him spiritually and let God do the rest 
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I’m so sorry you’re going through this…
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Okay so I dont agree that this is a problem generally I think having your own “outlet” is healthy. However you made ur feelings clear about this early on and he agreed with you. He does sound like he is afraid to talk to you which isn’t healthy so maybe you are a little over the top sometimes and could work on ur reaction to things when he does try and talk to you. Good on you for sorting some counselling, maybe with a 3rd party present he wont feel too afraid to talk. I understand your disgust in ur husband right now, but we all make mistakes and we all deserve to be forgiven for our sins. You are trying to fix this as husband and wife. Try not to be too hard on him, hes trying to open up to you. Love him for that, remember the man that you married. Remember although you arent happy about this at least he has told you about it and wants to fix it. Love each other.
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There are so many ways to go with this. It’s better porn than real life. Seriously it’s just porn. Maybe start getting involved, do the things he wants and make him happy!! I promise you the gates if heaven will still be open if you or him watch porn!
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Doesn’t sound like religion based. Sounds like he doesn’t do it because of you. IE when you’re fighting etc. Sounds like trust us the issue. And why feel the need to ask a grown man interrogating him like he’s your child? Hope this all leads to major self reflection.
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Prayer!! Lean into your church fam. Counseling❤
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I am know exactly sure what ur religion is but I am a Christian as well and don’t view porn as bad…not referring to an all the time thing. Even the bible tells men to masturbate. The therapist I had thru my church actually encouraged us to watch a little porn together to give our sex life some spice and said it was ok…but you have the right to believe how u believe and I won’t judge you for your beliefs but I agree with the person who said it seems like you and his views are different and he is probably afraid to tell u. Please try not to judge him since it sounds like a rare thing for him to watch and have a open conversation about how u feel and how he feels. Good luck to both of you.
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Why shame your husband for watching porn lol. All men do it
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If anybody on this thread thinks their man isn’t watching porn they are insane. He just doesn’t tell you because you’re annoying about it. Who cares of he wants to watch someone take it in the butt.
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Wow. Some of you people are assholes.
She’s not asking your judgement on her beliefs with God or porn.
My husband and I don’t either.
It’s not for everyone. Some of us don’t get off watching other people have sex. Or girls kidnapped and forced into the trade, drugs. Raped. Beat etc. .
If you do. Good for you. Nobody is judging you for it . Definitely a lot more to porn then what u see. If u take time to research.
Trust is the factor. No matter what it is. You two had an agreement that worked for you.
Porn can become an addiction. It can spiral out of control.
People screw up. Temptations get the best of us. Talk through and work through it. Counselling would be a good help. And don’t let anyone else’s judgements make you think how u feel is wrong. There are a lot of men and women who feel the same way. Goodluck
Sounds like he might have a reason to not want to tell you things. Whether or not you think watching porn is wrong, you clearly have made him feel inferior by your own admittance. You need to take a step back and look at yourself.
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Idk who the original poster is, but please private message me
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Omg. This shit cracks me up…
I just hate how women on here who HATE porn make it seem like it’s just a man thing. I’m pretty sure I read somewhere that WOMEN actually watch more porn then men.
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I really think porn is only a problem when it’s all the time to where its affecting your sex life or if they’re having live chats but just here and there I dont see why that’s such a big deal…would you prefer he sit there staring at you while he does it…if all the other areas of your marriage are healthy then leave it alone I get that he lied and that’s wrong but damn I can kind of see why he did
Just because he watches it doesn’t mean he’s addicted! This is weird and no wonder he doesn’t want to have sex. Men are sexual beings. They can’t help it, so expecting them to be perfect saints is just setting your marriage up for failure.
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Idk what to say, but while he may say he does, he obviously doesn’t have the same view of porn as you do.
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Your married . You have kids
So you have done stuff porn does. So whats the problem here? Would you rather him be unfaithful to you?
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Wow!! It’s just porn. You need to get over it. Would you rather him watch porn or maybe one day he cheats on you because your being controlling. Maybe you should watch it with him and stop being so uptight.
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He has sinned, chuck him in the bin and find a new child of the lord.
No but seriously, he isn’t hurting anyone and if he wants to do that with his body, let him.
Other then that maybe he needs a hobby to keep his hands busy?
Also I am unsure exactly why porn isn’t okay? Is it the masturbation?that fact it isn’t with who he has married in the eyes of god?
Sex is pretty much the same, except it’s 2 people not one.
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Another thing is are you doing everything in the bedroom to meet his needs… If you think porn is gross not sure what your kink is but maybe he is watching something on there that he would like in person but doesn’t want to come forward I mean most guys watch porn idk if they are honest about it but yeah most do…he probably still loves you but maybe he came clean to see your reaction to see if you love him to give something new a try find one you both like maybe it’s into… Then agian im anti rules in a religion since I acted possessed at my mom’s church… I’m Christian so don’t come at me buuuut just saying… is he trying to work with you on this if he is trying maybe it became and addiction for him and it’s hard to kick just speak to each other
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Why is everyone so nasty? She said they BOTH believe it is wrong, they went in to this agreeing it wouldn’t be a part of their relationship and he lied. Doesn’t matter what you think or feel.
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So he can lie to you for years and that’s ok but he watches porn and it’s an issue?! He clearly doesn’t view porn the same as u. It’s porn for heavens sake. Lots of men and women watch it. Guess what lots of us watch it with our spouse. I know shocking.
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Is it against your religion or personal beliefs? I’m Christian and watch and so does my bf of 10 years. Let him have his porn and don’t make him feel bad about it.
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No judgement here. Just a reminder. If you don’t learn to respond in a healthy way so he is comfortable coming to you honestly when he needs help with something he’s struggling with then he will struggle alone, unless lying is another problem he has. Since you mentioned religion I’m going to assume Christianity (forgive me if I’m wrong) and encourage you to not leave him to fight that devil alone. But woman to woman I am sorry your heart hurts, please be honest with the counselors as to why this bothers you and don’t use Jesus as the reason. You guys fight a lot you said so you’re probably insecure.
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its porn… im sorry you feel so horrid over this but its seriously pictures or movies… better this than cheating… and if hes scared to tell you … maybe you need to find other ways to react then flipping out or going horse shit balls crazy… and then hed be more willing to tell you things as a spouse should… if its against your religion thats for him to take up with god… dont judge unless you are ready to be judged… hes your husband you claim you love him but you are acting like he had sex with someone… ITS PICTURES…
Questions,is he good to you & your kids? Does he make a good living to provide for all of you? Are you a stay at home mom because he works his ass for you all? Is he mean or nasty to you or your kids? If he is a good man, provides for your family & really a decent guy, get over it. At least he told you. If he is not really interesting in you, maybe you should watch a little porn. Doesn’t make someone a bad person. Plus, like you said, you don’t want him to touch you…real nice. marriage there. 
Leave if you don’t want him anymore, you will make him happy after a while, because you are not happy now !!!..
Per google it’s all good for him to beat his meat
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Please remember that you’re a sinner, too. We all are. If you can’t set this aside and move on, together in Christ, then are you practicing the meaning of forgiveness? Yes, he sinned. No, you did not look at porn. Don’t turn your happy home into a battleground. He’s young, he has hormones, and you shouldn’t tax your body with another pregnancy yet awhile. He might be trying to not create another baby FOR YOUR SAKE! I’m not a particularly good Bible scholar, but I know there’s Commandment about not committing adultery. He’s messing with paper or video, not a human being. Think about it.
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He admitted he did something wrong and you dont know how to cope. I can see why he is afraid to tell you the truth.
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Please click and support the movement Fight the New Drug
Religion aside. Not only is the porn industry is so sickening, the damage it does to the human brain watching it is real.
-
Porn encourages self-gratification
Problem: Delayed gratification is a crucial skill to learn if one is to maintain control and direction in their life. Basically, the healthiest of individuals have mastered the art of discipline and delayed gratification.
Repeatedly giving into the urge to watch pornography leads to a lack of ability to delay gratification. Your brain becomes more and more focused on the things you find pleasurable and the discipline of delayed gratification falls to the wayside. -
Porn destroys our values
Problem: Video is powerful. We live in a world where we need to see something to believe it and in our fast-paced, information-driven world, video is the preferred means of communication and information dissemination.
The thing is, video has the power to influence and even replace behaviors in your mind without you being consciously aware of what you are seeing. Scary, right?
As you watch videos, your subconscious mind is rapidly dissecting, translating and making sense of what it is being fed. The research has found that the subconscious mind translates and subsequently changes our behavior in one disturbing way:
Pornography programs us to lower our standards sexually. It encourages us to seek sex and, in some cases, build intimate and unhealthy relationships with people who are willing to have sex without any boundaries. As exciting as that sounds, having sex with anyone who is available can be a sign of someone without much discipline.
Related: How Porn Warps Ideas About Sex
A truly mature person at some point in their life must have control over their sexuality. You should not be a slave to your sexual desire—instead, you should master and control it.
In addition to that, hundreds of hours of porn create certain expectations of what sex looks like. The average 16-year-old consuming pornography is literally getting his or her sex education from the videos he/she watches. And that’s not good, especially because porn sells a warped fantasy and exaggerated reality of what real sex is like. -
Porn can cause erectile dysfunction
Problem: This one is specifically for guys. Virility is important for almost every guy I know. The rise in porn-induced erectile dysfunction is something to be alarmed about. Frequently watching porn can lead to erections which can increasingly only be induced by hardcore pornography. That’s not healthy.
Porn consumption then becomes a sort of psychological conditioning which creates performance anxiety. Yikes.
Related: PIED 101: The Science Behind Porn-Induced Erectile Dysfunction -
Porn encourages social isolation
Problem: Watching porn, in most cases, demands isolation. Anything which consumers do in secrecy usually leads to shame. One of the first effects of frequently watching porn for men and women, especially those who are young, is social awkwardness in public, which ironically, leads to more shame and hiding.
Isolation and shame make it difficult for us as people to share true intimacy with others. And it makes it difficult to truly grow and mature as a person, and reach our full potential as people.
Related: Why Being Anti-Porn & Anti-Shame Go Hand In Hand -
Porn doesn’t inspire goal setting
Problem: In my practice, I have never met someone hooked on porn who excelled at goal setting. As I stated earlier, most people who abuse pornography usually also struggle in their finances, relationships, and careers. It’s no coincidence.
The aforementioned “self-gratification” is a habit which cannot coexist with achieving worthy, difficult goals.
People don’t “schedule” pornography consumption the way they schedule time to work on their business or complete projects. It’s usually, “I’m going to watch porn from now till… my body shuts down sexually or I get bored.” Part of this is biological.
Dopamine is a neurotransmitter (a chemical released by nerve cells to transmit signals to other nerve cells.) It’s a key player in the part of our brain responsible for reward-motivated behavior.
Sex, eating tasty food, getting approval (“likes” on social media) all trigger the release of dopamine.
Related: A Binge Day In The Life Of A Porn-Obsessed 20-Year-Old
The more often porn is watched, the more often our brains are flooded with dopamine. Consumers slowly become desensitized to its effects and need more stimulation to “feel the rush” or “get a fix.”
This means that their reward circuitry can fundamentally change.
Harness
This reward circuitry is crucial in achievements that are truly valuable in a person’s life, such as, contributing in a meaningful way to society, developing a highly sought-after skill, building a family, maintaining friendships, building a business, competing in sports or excelling in a career.
Porn can destroy the ability to set, achieve, and enjoy big goals. Any momentary pleasure isn’t worth that.
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We all sin differently.
I don’t know who the original poster is but they are free to private message me if they want.
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So much ignorance on here.
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Find out what kinda porn he watches, is it BDSM? If so maybe you should go to the Adult Store, like Adam And Eve, and buy some shit he would like, let him tie you up and have sex with you, if that’s what he is into… maybe you should stop being so hypocritical about shit and try to have fun in life, remember you only live once…best make the most of it woman. FFS… Christian woman my ass… how about you follow the man’s rules then, because I’m sure the Bible says the Man is in charge, and the woman will obey him.
Since people seem to be tearing you apart because of the no porn thing… the reason a lot of Christians don’t watch porn is because of Jesus saying whoever looks at another person in lust has already committed adultery in their heart. Weather you agree with it or not, it’s something they both agreed to and some Christians feel very strongly about it but don’t minimize her feelings just because you don’t agree. To OP,you may have better support posting this in a Christian group or page.
Either way,the lying is a big deal too and counseling wouldn’t hurt
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It’s ok to be married to a man that watches porn, he’s not dirty or anything.
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Sounds like there is a communication issue and perhaps he feels embarrassed for something he enjoys. This isnt a big deal for many but i respect that it is for you. Make sure your not forcing your beliefs on him.honestly,id be more concerned about the lying though
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First off men are men with that being said. U overreacting on this it’s sounds like to me get over it it’s life if he not out cheating maybe the problem with u not him
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Please ignore the people laughing at you and saying “it’s just porn.” Porn is detrimental to a marriage. I’m glad you are seeking out discussing this with your marriage counselor. My only thoughts to give you are to pray earnestly. Pray for yourself, pray for your husband, and pray for your marriage. Trust that God will work this out and that He is your ultimate source of comfort and peace. I really hope this gets resolved for you both. Some people do struggle with pornography and it’s not as simple as “you’re not fulfilling his needs.” If he is seriously struggling with this then be compassionate towards him and help him through it, don’t judge him. If he’s not actually struggling and he’s lying about wanting to/planning on stopping, then I would question his faith in God and what he considers right and wrong, and what that will look like for your marriage going forward.
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I heard that men that are addicted to porn want a woman to move and look like that. They just dont want to sleep with their significant other and they play with themselves
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He watched porn he was acting in it…
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If your love is not stronger then porn then your marriage will not last work on it
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Porn is responsible for sex trafficking of countless women and children. I think it’s disgusting and I’m an atheist… these ladies here just don’t want to take it in the butt so would rather their man watch porn so they can stay boring lovers…
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He don’t think porn is that wrong lmao. It’s not a big deal at the end of the day. It’s just porn. If he had an unhealthy addiction to it or was cheating on you with live can girls then I would be concerned. But what man in the history of men hasn’t watched porn??? Like such unicorn doesn’t exist lmao.
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You know it would be different if he had cheated on you but something so innocent as a man watching porn I would definitely not blow this totally out of proportion. I understand that you 2 have discussed this matter and have said that it’s not right but seriously it could be a whole hell of alot worse !! Atleast he was honest with you and you do have to look at the fact that you 2 were having problems when this occurred. He’s a man and men have needs and if they aren’t honored by their spouse then they find a way to subdue the issue. Atleast he’s not out there actually cheating on you with a woman so count your blessings and let the man behind a man. Obviously you have something more going on here than what you posted and it seems to me it has a little to do with some insecurity within yourself. He sounds like a decent man coming forth and letting you know what he did it isn’t as bad as your making it and for you to say that you don’t even want him touching you brings me to think you are not happy about yourself. So take a good look in the mirror and figure out what is really going on here. Be thankful that you have a loving truthful husband and 2 beautiful children and a relationship that really shouldn’t be ended in kaos over something so minor as watching a video. Maybe it would be a good idea for you to livin things up a little in the intimate area. Maybe some more alone time a little music some candles even a desire to change a few ways you do things to make it more interesting in the bedroom with the man you love some lingerie a dab of perfume you see where I’m going with this ? The problem with couples today is the fact that they just lose interest and that’s why it’s a good thing to change things up ever so often to make it interesting. And sweetie I have no idea what you look like but if even its a factor that after having a couple children and maybe you don’t feel as sexy or look as good that doesn’t mean your life in the intimate area has to end there are outfits out there that fit every kind there is and you need to feel better about yourself to open up your mind heart and soul to see yourself as a beautiful woman who has a man whose been there with you through thick and thin and still wants to try so you need to do the same. See yourself as a sexy beautiful woman and try to do a little extra to make things better for you 2 . There’s millions of women out there that wish they had what you have so please don’t screw this up by your own insecurities, you can make this right I have faith in you girl !! Don’t lose what alot of women wish they had over something so little. Good luck in new life I’m sure it will be just magical !!
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Girl you need to get over yourself!! He’s a man all men love porn 
You sound like you want to control him. If your bitching at him about it he probably doesn’t want to have sex with you. You sound like an ol Prune. You probably just lay there on your back and don’t even get into the sex like he wants. He probably needs more excitement than the same ol boring sex life he has. Be happy he hasn’t went out & cheating on you. As far as what I’ve said maybe you should watch some porn and maybe you would like it too:woman_shrugging:
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Let me say again… you’re not insecure bc you want to be respected in your marriage and don’t settle for “men will be men”.
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At least it was watching someone have sex on TV then in their bedroom having sex with them 🤷 also looking at other people is normal we are human beings attraction is like a magnet
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I think it’s such an issue cause of your religion. Cut out the religion for this fight… I’d be more mad he lied over and over again.
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Sounds like y’all are not equally yolked… You don’t have to be to have a working relationship but you do have to be open and understanding and both of y’all have to be able to communicate.
It’s good y’all are going to talk to your counselor about this. Make sure during the session you watch his actions, behaviors and answers. Really listen to what he has to say because that’s going to tell you a lot.
Also don’t hold back your feelings during counseling. He needs to know exactly what your going through especially since him hiding his truth is something he’s done before.
I think if it really bothers you so much that you don’t want to be touched by him, maybe y’all should sleep in separate rooms but you can’t sit there and obsess over what he’s doing. You can’t control him just as he can’t control you. You both are equal partners in this.
It sounds like you’re very religious - I’m not knocking that. Be you! But it sounds like your husband is straying from the man you thought or knew him to be.
Maybe talk to him about his beliefs CIVILLY and find out if he’s feeling different from how you knew him to be.
People change you know. 
It’s alright when that happens. It sucks, but it’s part of life.
I wish you luck. Just try your best not to obsess. Maybe prayers or Bible study to get your mind off of this.
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If it’s the fact that it is against your religion that bothers you, I would agree with whoever said to leave religion out of this one. It’s kind of hard to form robust arguments using religion as the framework. If it makes you insecure like it does me, tell your husband that it does and maybe you guys can try to have an open conversation about his honest thoughts on it. I explained to my husband that him watching porn made me insecure and it lead to a really long and honest conversation. We came to an agreement that as long as we had an honest dialogue about our relationship and feelings towards each other. Here we are about 5 years later and still happily married. We have talked about him watching it from time to time since then, but the gratification he gets from it is different than the love he gets from me and until he shows me different, I have no reason to be bothered by it.
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How would your husband feel if he knew you were blasting such private things about him in secret?
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maybe he looks at it as educational 🤷
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I understand about your thoughts on it and such, and he did lie but the way I see it is I would rather my man watch porn over pop putting his penis inside another females vagina. I’d prefer my man not to watch it but I will not control what he does. Hope everything works out in your favor
Porn no matter how you view it is not wrong
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Maybe you’re not kinky enough in the sack for him or he’s sick of you preaching how “against your religion it is” and likes shucking his corn to someone that isn’t a prude
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Watching porn doesn’t have to be taboo and could possibly strengthen your relationship if you watch it and enjoy it together. Perhaps you should also try changing how to your react to something so normal so your husband wouldn’t be inclined to lie to you. I can see how and why he would lie in this instance. Sex and intimacy is important for married couples and understanding each other’s desires could bring you two closer together.
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Do not ever let anyone tell you that you are wrong for your feelings or convictions. Period. You have a right to be upset. I would suggest therapy for both yourself and your husband. Just like with cheating physically, it can take time to get over it and move on. But if you’re serious about your love for him, then therapy is a must for the two of you. Good luck sweetie. Dont listen to the judgemental people here.
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People only change for themselves. Trying to force someone to change will only make them lie to you and hide their behavior. On another note I have no problem with porn. I’d rather my husband watch porn than cheat on me with another woman.
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So u have never committed a sin before? Seriously? Get over yourself. For better or worse remember?
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Stop asking him if he’s been watching porn and bam! Problem solved.
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I don’t think it’s part of the 10 Commandments… I would shake it off.
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You don’t even want to be touched by him and yet in that same sentence you say you love him so much and want your marriage to work. 
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I honestly dont think it has anything to do with your religion. I think it has everything to do with insecurities. Men like T&A… as long as hes coming home to you every night. Get over it and quit being a drama queen. He could be out doing way worse things!
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Him lying is wrong but porn isnt lol
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If you don’t have a problem with it, then it’s really no one else’s business.
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It’s causing such a friction because y’all are looking at porn as a way of cheating or wrong and that’s we’re it becomes a problem because he had to hide it from you in so many ways that can be turned into an addiction. As partners you should be able to come together and try new things and voice your concerns or desires with out judgement. Being secretive and judgy is what messes marriages up sex is such a natural thing it’s such a beautiful thing and there are so many ways to enjoy it if he wants to watch videos I’m not saying all the time but why not watch it together or go buy a toy. I’m no one to speak or have my opinions about your religion I’m Christian too but also prioritize to have a happy healthy sex life with my husband.
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I love it how there’s a post about porn everyone is an expert on it…
Porn isn’t wrong my husband watches it and so do I lol. I don’t ever remember it against Christian religion good luck hun
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