My husband is in complete financial control I am left with our 4 children are left penniless

Where do I begin?! My husband and I have been together 17 yrs and we have 4 children ranging from the age of 5-15. He claims he is old school and the woman belongs at home while the man goes out to earn a living so that is what we have done. I have remained home with the children and he works out of the home. Throughout these 17 yrs, he has been the only one to have access to funds and I am left home with the children with absolutely nothing daily. We have 2 personal vehicles and he has a company work truck. Every day both of our personal vehicles are left on E when he leaves for work, when we do go somewhere he will put just enough gas for us to get to and from. I can’t tell u how many times I’ve run out of gas on the side of the road. We are both smokers and he has the cigarettes in his pocket at all times and I have to ask for each one, one at a time. For years I justified this behavior being we weren’t in the best of financial shape however that is not the case now and hasn’t been for some time. I am doing my part and his at home, I care for the children both while he’s at work and while he’s home, I do all meals, dishes, laundry, housework, lawn care, school work and he feels that is a fair trade off. He works 7 hrs a day so he feels he shouldn’t be bothered while I’m slaving 15+ hrs a day not to mention he feels he is owed something for anything he does do financially. This man is walking around with 35,000 and the kids and I are left with nothing. We file jointly so every stimulus check, child tax credit, etc has gone right into his account. I am fighting him for the absolute bare necessities every single day down to groceries and as I said he feels he is owed for anything he does provide, meaning he expects me to be intimate and I have absolutely zero desire to be. I feel like a caged animal. I don’t know how much more I can take mentally, I feel so broken and dead inside and I just want out but don’t have a leg to stand on. Most recently he has threatened me with our children’s back to school clothes, basically telling me if I want them to have them bad enough I’ll do something for them. It has gotten progressively worse since I got pregnant with our most recent child(the 5 yr old) that is when things really got bad. While pregnant I had severe nausea and vomiting for a better half of the pregnancy and there were obviously times I wasn’t in the middl to be intimate and he would stand over top of me while laying in the bed sick saying the most horrific things. When I went into labor I had to call an ambulance to come and get me as it was the middle of the night and he felt as though I should be able to wait until morning as this was my fourth baby. I tried to hold off by getting into the bathtub to ease the pain from the contractions and he was furious as the noises I was making during contractions were disturbing his sleep, he was in the bedroom imitating the sounds I made saying “give me a break” I know this is a little bit all over the place, It’s hard to sum everything up into this little bit. i just thought this may be a place to get some input, advice, support, resources as I don’t really know where else to turn at this point. Thank y’all in advance❤️

Girl do you have family you can stay with? Because you need to get outta there, what the hell. That is disgusting behavior on his part. Get the kids, and go stay with a relative or friend. Don’t tell him where you’re going. Get a job, save up, etc. I’m so sorry you have to deal with this, but the only way this will seem to stop is if you leave.

Unfortunately, no. My father just passed away this past yr. I have my moms support but there’s not much she can do to help. She’s in a one bedroom apartment and struggling herself. There are 5 of us, I couldn’t ask that of her. All of my children will be in school this yr so I plan on driving for Lyft during school hrs, at least until I find something. I know u have to start somewhere but I just feel like I have such a long road ahead of me before I’m able to get out of this mess.