My newborn will not sleep at night and my husband and I are exhausted: Advice?

She needs to be flipped. It may sound stupid but had to do it with my 2nd. Dad has to do it. Put baby to bed at night but before he does, slowly turn baby a full 360. Then put her to bed. My son went from sleeping all day to sleeping all night

She’s a newborn, geez if she wakes up, it’s because she needs something.

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Hi. Firstly congratulations on becoming a mom. I know it is all overwhelming at the moment. From what you typed it sounds as if your baby has her das and nights mixed.
Mine was exactly like this.
To change it up make sure to wake up at 6:30am and open all windows and curtains to let baby know it’s day time. Have bay awake no longer then 45 min to an 1hr. Then feed baby and put to sleep. Once baby wakes, play a little give some fresh air as well to baby. When evening falls close all windows and curtains to let baby know its night time. Start a bedtime route. With a bath a good massage maybe read a little and then it’s bedtime with all lights off. It’s also important to note baby is in what’s called the 4th trimester and she most probably wants to be close to you so I would suggest letting baby sleep on your chest. Don’t worry this won’t be forever… By a month or 2 she will be sleeping on her own. It’s all best to avoid coffee and sweet stuff if you are breastfeeding as this could cause baby to have cramps. Babies work better with routines… Best of luck!

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She is a newborn and only a week old it’s completely normal she should be up every 2-3 hrs for feedings… she has her nights and days mixed up still…

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I didn’t know newborns slept all night. Mine didn’t, none of my siblings did either. I was up feeding my son in the night, changing his diaper and whatnot. Figured that was normal for a newborn. Yes I was tired for sure.

The best advice I have is just… cuddle her.
Sleep sitting up in bed or sitting in a chair with her cuddled up to you. I had to do the same thing until my daughter was about 3 weeks old.
Try swaddling. A nice heavy swaddle. Or not swaddling at all. Give a warm bath, feed and try and put down. Let baby sleep naked! My daughter slept best when she was naked even at a month old.
Maybe invest in one of those cuddling pillow baby things they have that mimic being in the womb

Swaddle and swing. Saved my life with both my kids

Well she can’t sleep all day and night

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I had to sleep with my son on my chest. He wouldn’t sleep any other way. It’s normal and believe it or not you’ll adjust. Just try to nap during the day. Or sleep all day with her until you get her on a schedule. Congratulations and it’s absolutely normal to feel frustrated but make sure to reach out of you feel angry with her from lack of sleep. Call a family member or friend to come help so you can sleep.

I felt SO GULITY sleeping during the day when my newborn slept. But that really what you gotta do.
And a routine I know you cant bathe them yet but around 7 just wipe baby with a warm rag, feed her, soothe, her. Eventually she will fall into a routine

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My son 6 nearly and up at least once a night…

Now have 9 week old too

Thing is every baby is different…

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A tight swaddle, and sleep when she sleeps. House work can wait. Mental health and sleep are important!

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A week? Your baby is normal. Swaddling worked for me. It gets better.

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We didnt get any sleep until about 4 months in. With both of our babies. I had to work very hard to get them both on a schedule and keeping them both up during the day. My first born was pretty easy. Our second one not so much. She was the one that had to be swaddled every night. Try a good swaddle. Only at night though…dont let her get to comfortable during the day. It’s hard girl…lots and lots of coffee!!! Good luck surprisingly you will make it through this with very little sleep. :heart:

Oh just wait until you’re a couple months without sleep… I’m sorry to be negative but newborns don’t sleep for very long at one time even if they do sleep a tiny bit at night it will be a while until you experience a full night’s sleep. You can try every trick in the book to try to get that baby to sleep but chances are it will still be a little while before they sleep for any stretch of time. I was so sleep-deprived with my first son I started seeing and hearing things and I needed to call my mom for help. My second boy is 5 months now and he just started sleeping through the night around three months but has had some issues with sleep regression so last night was the first night he slept through the night again in a while.

The first few weeks are the hardest. I slept and napped when mine did there is no routine or schedule to be on right now. Any little bit of sleep helps. Maybe sleep in shifts if your SO is willing. Couple hours here and couple hours there. I know it’s not much but it’s better than nothing. Also are you breast feeding or bottle feeding? May not be getting satisfied with enough food. I agree with the warmth and closeness some are saying. Right now your baby needs your security and needs to be close to you. I would say swaddle but mine hated it. I know you probably feel like this is pure hell. I’m sorry you are having a difficult time. It will get better. Best of luck to you.

My 2nd was like this until he was about 3 months old. I also had a c section & a 2 year old running around. It was hard but I had to get some sleep somehow. Our solution was for my SO to slept on the couch a lot & we bought a co sleeper. It stayed on my SO side of the bed & I would keep my hand on my son basically the whole night. I can’t say that I sleep well because Im honestly afraid of co sleeping but it worked. Crappy sleep is better than no sleep & my son slept great. As he got older he started sleeping in his bed more. At about 3 months he had transitioned to his own bed completely.

Did you try a swaddle? Did wonders with our son, he would wake up because of his arms moving, which scared him, maybe she’s cold, in the Netherlands we use a warm bottle. Could also be colics, in that case infacol. Can be used from birth. My 1st child suffered from colics, this was the only thing that worked for her. But like some of the people say in the replies, sleep when she sleeps is best, so you don’t get too tired.

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Have your husband sleep on the couch. You and her sleep in bed. welcome to parenthood.

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Routine every night. Soothing bath or warm wash cloth, low light, soft music, rocking chair, book reading, Kay in crib/bed, tuck in snug, rub too forehead or pay back and do this ever night. Calming, comforting. You will have some crying, but don’t let it go more than few minutes for a newborn. They need the skin cuddle, bonding.

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It’s normal, the baby will eventually learn days are light and fun and nights are dark and for sleep. Be patient :heart:

Nested bean zen sack… Order one, you will not regret it.

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Nap when she naps! My youngest would only sleep if she was swaddled. Plus, she’s a newborn! She’s going to want to be with mommy.

Shes a week old…you are on her schedule, for now. Eventually it will be normal, but for now you need to try your best to sleep when she sleeps during the day.

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My kids never slept . Good luck .

Her days and nights are definitely mixed up. So it sounds like you guys can get her to sleep when she’s in bed with you. Okay so maybe let her. Like let her sleep with you so she’ll sleep at night and then keep her awake the next day besides normal naps which is a lot for a new born and do that for a couple days until her days and nights aren’t mixed up and then help her learn to sleep on her own bed after that

If he’s had previous kids then he should know that newborns don’t sleep completely through the night. That’s what they do. My daughter would wake up every 2-3 hours throughout the night until she was almost a year old. It’s hard but it’s apart of parenting and having kids. I literally felt like my body was going to shut down because I was so tired.

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Swaddle or get a bassinet to move right next to your bed. My son would only sleep if he new someone was close by we would sleep holding each others hands .
Or one of you sleep on the couch or second bedroom and alternate nights.

I’m there with ya. You just have to take it day by day and let yourself be frustrated and drink tons of coffee :ok_hand:t3::wink:. Try all the suggestions in the comments as they will all work on some days. It slowly gets a bit better. My little girl needs to be held as well all the time. Some babies just need it more than others

Awe, it’s hard momma. She’s a week old and she hasn’t adjusted to being in the world yet. She’s not used to not being close to you. It’s all new to her as well. So it’s going to be tough for a few weeks. Sleep when baby sleeps if you can. Or maybe try to swaddle her. I wish there was better advice to give but unfortunately there’s not. You’re on her schedule right now. It’ll get a little easier down the road.

Baby’s have their days and nights mixed up bc while in your belly they sleep while you’re most active and moving around and then are awake at night when you’re sleeping. While in our bellies us walking around is almost like being rocked to them. It’s hard. Try your hardest to keep her up during the day. Are you swaddling her in a sleep sac at night?

Sleep when the baby does! Sleep as you once knew it is gone!#joyhoodof parening#

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Our son did that. And that was just whom he was. He also had a dairy intolerance but even after that it didnt help much. Now at 13 we can laugh how exhausted we where and proud we did it all on our own. We made it and you will to :heartbeat:

I had this same issue with my one month old when she was newborn! I was in the hospital for a few days and I swear the nurses would hold her all night so I could sleep and heal from the c-section. While helpful in the hospital, it made it hard the first week or so. When we got home she slept all day and and night it was difficult. My advice, sleep during the day when you can. You need to get some energy. Second, you need to make sure you’re on this day schedule: sleep, eat, wake. It’s okay for babies to sleep. They just need to be awake too for a little bit between naps. This will make sure she is up for a little bit and soon she’ll get used to being up part of the day and sleep during the night. Good luck!

She is a newborn, welcome to the club. We are ALL exhausted.

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She knows no different than to be near you. So having her sleep alone is scary for her.
Try to swaddle her and get a infant cosleeper bed.

I was in the same boat when my son was first born. He was ready to party all night which meant no sleep for me while also trying to recover from my c section and the fact that I hadnt slept for two days before he was born. My husband was working a lot at that time too so I was on my own. I used to put him on a bouncer and would kinda rock him to sleep and wait at least 20 minutes after he fell asleep and moved him to his bed. (I was paranoid thinking I would kill him if I put him in bed with me cause I sleep with a billion pillows and he was too tiny) and I would fall asleep right after. Your house will look like a mess for the first few weeks but you need to sleep mama.

Keep her up as much as you can during the day. Keep her in her diaper if you have to (don’t let her freeze, but not too comfortable). I’m guessing all you need to do to keep her up is put her down. Now don’t keep her up all the time, babies need lots of sleep, but make sure she’s up for 30-60 mins every 3 or 4 hours for feeding and lively interaction. Or just put her down and let her cry if she needs to cry to keep awake. Also nap with her several times a day too, because she is still going to be getting up at night. Then get one of those stretchy cotton velcro swaddle blankets, wrap her super tight, in some warm pjs, make sure she’s really warm and cozy. Feed her (maybe even an extra 1/2 ounce) at bedtime. Turn the lights out, turn everything out. Put on pumping heart white noise or some kind of loud consistently white noise, like the vacuum or something, and rock her to sleep (in the swaddle) then put her down in a fitted bassinet (like with one of those baby sleeper things that will frame her body and head so she feels totally secure and she can’t move or topple, to prevent triggering her fall reflex) and go tf to sleep too! And then get up to feed. Whatever you get from that might be the best you’re gonna get? Make it as womb like as possible. Pitch black, hot, vaccum cleaner or fan or heartbeat noise but super loud white noise, mommy smells… did I mention really warm and really physically secure?:+1:

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Sleep when she sleeps. If you have family around ask for help. Also if you are are upset and stressed that can also cause her to be. Newborns are tough but you will SURVIVE! Welcome to parenthood your in for one hell of a ride.

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I had to cosleep with my son that was the only thing that worked. I did the newborn stage with no ones help. It is overwhelming for sure but you aren’t the only one out there struggling. My son slept in his swing a lot too. Maybe you need to wake her during the day for feedings more. You got it don’t give up

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My youngest would only sleep in his car seat for the first couple weeks. I’d have him right next to me so I could reach over and rock it if I needed to.

She’s a week old you really expect her to sleep through the night? My daughter is one and she still doesn’t sleep at night. If she screams when you put her down maybe she is colic.

Shes a newborn , shes not gonna sleep all night,

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Unfortunately that’s life with a newborn! Some sleep some don’t!
Try to nap as much as possible when she does sleep during the day!
My 8 and 2.5 year old still wake up most nights!
Just know that it won’t last forever! Coming into this world is a lot of change for your baby! :heart:
All babys are different and it takes time! You will find your rythm! :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

Keep her awake during the day. Give her a bath, strip her down to her diaper… do anything to keep her up. It sounds like she has her days and nights flipped so a couple days of keeping her up should help!

Swaddle her we had to go get the little bear with the sound off mammas heart brat put it right next to him he would be sound asleep it’s a new world for her god bless

Try a baby shusher. Helped with my grandson.

My babygirl is a week old today too :heart: it’s rough sometimes but luckily I have a great baby. During the day when I need to wake her or keep her up, I tickle her ribs or her feet. I also undress her a little bit to get her up or change her diaper. She doesn’t like being nakey lol she sleeps better when she’s in my arms too so i know the feeling. I’ve also found that swaddling her n then putting another blanket on her bunched and tucked at her sides sort of makes her think she’s being held. You’ll get thru it. Something you gotta be consistent with and have to just tough it out for the time being

I used one of the kid rocker cradle things that vibrates. That seemed to help.

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Listen- it’s tough but she’s 1 week old. She has no sense of time and it’s normal for babies to have their sleeping schedule out wack. By month 2 she should be somewhat on your schedule, but for now…you are on hers. Yes it’s exhausting; yes it’s frustrating; yes it’s depressing; but don’t you dare let this defeat you and lose your patience with her. If the ONLY way you can get some shut eye is with her in the bed it’s because she wants and needs to feel your warmth and loves listening to your heartbeat. So ask Dad , very politely, to sleep on the couch or maybe an air mattress…set up your body pillow so baby doesn’t roll off the bed, and lay with her. Very carefully. Coddle her. Love her. She needs your comfort and you ALL need sleep.

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newborns love to be held because it’s your warmth, smell, sound of voice and heartbeat that gives them the comfort they had inside your belly. Make it bright in the day and keep it loud. Have the radio on or TV on, vacuum and do the dishes, make it apparent that daytime is loud and bright and that nighttime is quiet and dark. Perhaps run a fan or dehumidifier four simple white noise which may help her fall asleep to.

If you’ve read this far then you’re now well aware that this is normal and you’re just going to have to accept it. The fourth trimester is hard.

To make it a little easier for you since baby wants to be close, just co-sleep with the baby so you will all get more sleep. If you follow the safe 7 guidelines for bedsharing there is no added risk, or get a bassinet or sidecar at least if you don’t want to bedshare.

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She’s a baby :sweat_smile: a newborn. This is literally what you signed up for. Every baby is different. So good luck. :sweat_smile:

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I just had my baby boy and a c section also he’s 3 weeks now he dosent sleep through the night either he will wake up is 3 hours for feeding but I try to keep him up as much as possible during the day… I bundle him give a bottle burp him and then put him in his bassinet he falls asleep but then wakes up his 3 hours. My husband works all the time to but he helps as much as he can. You’ll get through it girl☺️

Bub has been snug as a bug for the last 9 months in the comfort of you. 1wk out in a big scary space of course she is going to want to feel close & comforted.
Easier said than done but you need to nap when the baby naps during the day. Ignore the house work & other things you need to heal & just be there for baby & you.
Reach out to family to help, you aren’t alone

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Dont hold her in the day. Strip her to a diaper to feed her.

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Many years ago when our daughter did this, a good friend said to me, “I’ll tell you what to do - you won’t believe me, but it will work if you try it.”
She explained to me that our little one had her days and nights reversed; her suggestion was to either move the crib around the other way in the room, so that she would be facing the other direction. Or lay her down in the other end of her crib so that so she would be facing the opposite direction.
We tried it, and it worked! It might work for you, too! Good luck! :heart_decoration:

Her days and nights sound mixed up.
I would keep things as loud as possible throughout the day and keep her somewhat stimulated and then make sure everything stays quiet at night until she unmixes them. Maybe try swaddling at night and not during the day.
She is only 1 week old so this is normal.

If you live in Missouri then hit me up! I’ll come over and help with her while you two get some rest.

Download the app called Baby Sounds. My son loves the vacuum noise on there - it’s soothing for him. He can be screaming bloody murder and when I put that on he immediately goes quiet.

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My first baby was a month early it was so incredibly hard on me and my hubby he just cried and cried i had to feed him every 2-3 hrs I was pumping so Every 2-3 hrs he was up and I had to feed him through a bottle that he was slow at eating a bottle because he was a preemie so that took a while then I had to pump that took a while too I was getting hour increments of sleep for months it was hard I was exsausted he also co slept we had no choice my second and third baby were breast feed and it was alote easier by far because I could sleep and breastfeed but just to let you know it’s gonna be hard but it will be ok just have some patience and sleep when your baby sleeps good luck please don’t do cry it out methods yet you have a newborn they can’t handle being inside your tummy for do long then not be by you baby is too young still for this method

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Try to sleep when she sleeps I know the mom could do it and the poor dad I dont know when he can sleep .good luck with it I know how it is I had one like that .

Some of you are just plain bitches!

Change her bath times.
From morning to night.
However if she had been in your bed that’s gonna take sometime. When u know she isn’t wet hunger or hurt. Let her cry it out.
If she only ate 4 or more ounces she could want more…

Some babies are more gassy than other try burping him 1/2 way through feeding and again when done. Lay a shirt you have worn underneath him so he can smell you.

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My son used to do this and wouldnt sleep unless he was laying on my chest and this was allll dayyyyyy for 2 weeks, it was caused by a stomach ache from his formula. Maybe that could be the problem, I changed his formula and he instantly calmed down and could sleep wherever.

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She is a week old…it’s pretty much to be expected

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I don’t think there is anything you can do other than suffer. :joy::sob: I’m sorry that sucks so much. Your LO will start sleeping more at night but right now it sucks. If there is anyone you trust I’d say ask them if they dont mind coming over to hold your baby while you rest but I doubt theres much more you could do unless you do start bed sharing to sleep. My first baby was awake every 2 hours for a long time and I started falling asleep holding him in the rocking chair from being so so tired. And the whole time I was basically a zombie but we got past that point and I started getting better rest.

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Do u useca nitelight ?

Wat position u layin her down? Her side? Or back? Maybe put a pillow under mattress to lift it up she may not like the position she on

My son was like that at first as well. He’d even cluster feed at night so he got his days and nights mixed up. We are finally starting to get a decent night sleep and he’s a month old. They need to feed throughout the night until at least 3 months old. We don’t old our son a whole lot for this reason. When he is dead asleep we put him down. During the night we have a red light on (found out my baby doesn’t like the dark), we put my shirt I wear during the day in his bassinet, and use sleep music throughout the night BC he is used to sleeping with the noise and doesn’t like dead silence. This has been what helped us get 3-4 hrs sleep intervals throughout the night.

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If she is sleeping all day and up all nite sounds like she he day and nite round the wrong way. U need to make sure it’s dark at nite and super bright in the day. Speak to her heaps in the day. Have the TV on put the vaccum on make as much noise as possible. At nite be super quite have a dark room for sleeping in. Newborns do basically feed shite sleep though. Use white nose during the nite u can dowload an app. Do a routine at nite where u bath her then bed she will get there. Try and sleep when she does in the day too.

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They love being in a receiving blanket snuggly and warm they so use to be warm wen u were pregnant with her

A hat to on head babies love being warm socks on feet to. Cause if ur feet are cold ur whole body will be cold to the baby

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Becoming babywise book on amazon for 11$. It’s how we got our daughter to sleep through the night. She sleeps 12 hours at night now.

The only way my baby would sleep at night was in my arms so that’s how we sleep. No point in having her cry all night and not getting rest when all I had to do was lay her with me

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We have a 3 week old and we are in the same boat. “It won’t last forever” is my new mantra.

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Hunny they are not meant to sleep through the night at a week old, they need to eat every 2 hours, but If you can give her a warm bath at night and swaddle her, you may get an extra hour or so of sleep time. But when she is asleep (even when it’s in the middle of the day) you need to sleep too… also some aren’t keen on it but co-sleeping (holding the baby in your arms or on your chest) baby will sleep well; remember the baby was inside you for 9 long months surrounded by warmth and the sound of your heartbeat, sleeping on their own isn’t easy for them

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Swaddle her and for a lack of a better word, deal with it. And I say that as loving as I possibly can. My daughter is 5 months old and it took her about 3 weeks to grow out of screaming everytime we laid her down. It gets better!!! I also had an emergency csection with her and it was awful but it’s normal, she’s not used to being in the world, she is used to being warm in your womb and safe with your loud stomach grumbles etc. Give her some time to settle, don’t panic. IT WILL GET BETTER. :heart::heart::heart:

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Mine did this with upset tummy, the pediatrician recommended more burping. It worked.

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Lay her down and let her scream during the day. It won’t hurt her only make her lungs stronger. Wear her out just one day and she will sleep at night.

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At a week old she needs you! She cries cause she needs something…cuddles, food, to be changed, skin to skin or she just wants you. When she cries this is when we want to pick them up to establish that we are here and she is safe! She is still getting use to the world and way to early to think about letting her cry it out. It’s documented that babies in orphanages stop crying cause they got use to crying with no one coming for them.

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You are on her schedule, not the other way around. I get y’all are tired and have tried basically everything but you can’t force a newborn to sleep if they don’t want to.

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Awwww I remember feeling so exhausted also I had a csection… it gets better. My baby is 8 months old now

The best advice I can give is sleep when she sleeps

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She has her days and nights mixed up

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I understand the boat you are in. But, and I say this kindly ~ you are a slave to her needs, wants, sleep schedule etc. Slowly you will be able to bring some of your schedule into hers but when we become parents, we lose a lot of sleep. Try to give her a lavender (Johnson and Johnson soap and lotion) bath, and put lavender lotion on right before her 8-11pm bottle (not sure when you would like to lay down but sometime in those hours when ever she eats) time the bath and lotion to just before you know she will need to eat. Then swaddle her and LAY DOWN ALL OF YOU. It may not work the first time, but keep trying. Eventually this to shall pass.

My girl just turned 4 months today and we have a really hard time getting sleep as well… only way our baby would sleep was being held. At 4 months she is doing better but still sleeps in bed with one of us as she still gets up 2 or 3 times a night. It slowly gets better thats all I know

She is just a newbie. Cuddle her and make her feel loved. The exhaustion will pass.

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This is a newborn. They are all like this…

They feel secure on you because the only thing familiar is your heart beat. She will sleep then best on your chest, and you should cuddle her as often and as much as you can.

I often slept upright with my babies on my chest because I don’t move in my sleep and because we both slept better being this close.

Your husband has the option of sleeping on the couch if he can’t get any in the bed, you can also get “safe sleeper” type things that go in the bed with you and the baby sleeps in so no one can roll on her. Alternately, you could take her to the living room and sleep on the couch and have her in a bassinet beside you. Or you could put the crib right beside your bed in your room.

Welcome to motherhood. It’s exhausting.

Motherhood. You will be exhausted for the rest of your life. Not to sound mean, but get used to it. You signed up for this

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I suggest sleeping during the day then :woman_shrugging: at that age your on their schedule. When she gets older you can start putting her on nighttime daytime schedule. But unfortunately right now your at her beckon call right now. This is what motherhood looks like :woman_shrugging:

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Give her lots of sunlight during the day and darkness at night after a few days of that it should help her sort out her days and nights.

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Make sure you swaddle her, if you arent that may be part of her problem. My oldest 2 were a breeze but my 3rd didnt sleep through the night till he was 4 uhhh. But as a baby I had to swaddle him super tight. He was a large baby and used to be scrunched up. Do you have anyone that can come over during the day while you nap ? Now is the time to ask for help. It literally takes a village with some babies. Good luck mama

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Babies can’t produce melatonin (like we do to fall asleep) until around 3-4 months old. They need you to help them fall asleep until they can do it on their own. That’s why babies have us parents :heart:

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Sometimes you get a baby that sleeps so right lucky parents if you get a baby like this,sometimes you get the opposite,but it’s only been one week,you better get some help,talk to someone? Do you have a zgrandparent to step in and help?don’t put her in your bed you will regret it! Ruins them from sleeping in their own environment!

She’s got her days and nights mixed up! She will eventually get passed it, it’s a hard process but worth it!

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Newborns have their own schedule, you need to listen to their needs and wants, if they are awake so are you, if they sleep, take a nap with them. When my youngest was born he got his days and nights mixed up and I swear the first couple months I only slept like 2 hours a night. It’s part of being a parent. You sign up for the possibility of having a baby that doesn’t sleep, or a baby that cries lots, etc when you become a parent

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New borns are on opposite schedule to us as when they were in the tummy when you moved about during the day it rocked them to sleep and then when you were still and sleeping they were awake and kicking. It’s takes a while for them to readjust. All I can say is try to sleep during the day when she is sleeping so at least you get some rest and just brazen it out. Those first 6 to 12 weeks are horrendous but you will get there. Hugs mama.

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Both my babies did this, I slept during the day when they slept, after month 2 I made sure I was putting them in their bed at nap time during the day so they would start getting used to sleeping off of me. One thing that keeps my littlest one asleep through the night is gentle quiet music in the background. If its silent she wakes up at the smallest sound, but if there is music she stays asleep. I like mozart for her.

She’s only a week old she just wants to be held. Do u swaddle her??? Is she too cold or too warm???Thay have small co-sleepers that go into ur bed now, so she can be close to u n u can put ur hand in to comfort her or sing/humm so she knows ur right there. They have em at tjmaxx for $40 she was just in ur belly a week ago.

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Flip her i know it sounds weird it’s an old wife tell but it works