My siblings do not like the man I am with: Advice?

I have been dating my boyfriend for over three years. He’s the father of my seven month old, and I am very happy with him. He’s someone I can see myself saying yes to if he were to propose. I’ve never really wanted to get married or have kids, but our surprise baby kind of changed all that. The thing is… my siblings don’t like him. He and my sisters don’t get along for a number of reasons: my parents and oldest brother and SIL like him. However, because my sisters don’t like him, he’s not invited to family functions with the exception of my birthday. Funerals, birthdays, Christmas, family outings - whatever it may be, an invitation is not extended to him.

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I hope you would say yes. You had a kid with him. However my sister was right about my husband.

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I wouldn’t go if he wasn’t invited

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Sit down with them to figure out why they don’t like him…

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There is only one thats more important than the family you come from and that’s the family you create! If my partner couldn’t go then I for damn sure won’t be going either. I say lock them all in a room together and don’t let them out until there is peace. Lol.

Have you asked them why they don’t like him? There are two sides to every story. I’d talk to them and find out why, then address their reasons.

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Have you all sat down to discuss why he is not liked?

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They need to accept him. That’s your child’s father and he will want to spend he deserves to spend the holidays with you and his child whether they like him or not. My family doesn’t like my children’s father but he is always invited to functions as that’s their father and the man I’ve chosen to be with. There comes a time that they need to suck it up and understand you’re grown. It doesn’t matter who likes who. You’re together.

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The fact that she’s not questioning why her sisters don’t like him says to me that their dislike of him may have been earned and is deserved. :woman_shrugging:t2:

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I guess they see something wrong with the guy you’re with that you can’t see because you’re blinded by what you call love?

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Why do they have to invite him? Its always assumed if I’m invited…my husband is also.

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Something must of happened for them not to like him

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What are the reasons

They need to get over theirselves!!! Grow up he is who you picked!!!

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Your a family they don’t need to like him but they need to accept hom

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You guys have a kid, why isnt he invited? He is already family being the father of your child.

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Nun of my siblings like my husband all bc of our age difference. But if they dont really have a reason to like him and he take care of yall family and treats u like a man is supposed to treat a woman than I wouldnt worry about it.

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Sounds childish i wouldny be going to family functions then if he isnt invited then in not invited

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Weather they like him out not he is the father of your child. A lil more than just a bf. Sounds like they need to suck it up and get along. At least for holiday. It’s their choice if they don’t want to see him other than that.

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Definitely need more details. Is he not invited to your sister’s house only? Does your mother not invite him because of your sister? Is he abusive, sarcastic,flirty, demeaning,Republican, Democrat,Communist? Need more details!

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Depends on the reasons they dont like him, but if my man was deliberately not invited then i wouldnt go. If its petty then stand up for your man. However if theu have good reason to not like him,then respect that.

Talk to them if you haven’t already. None of my family likes my bf, but if they were to disinvite him to family things I wouldn’t go either. You dont have to like someone to be an adult and be civil in family settings and such.

Everyone likes my hubs besides my brother I wouldn’t kick my hubs to the curb just cause someone in my family dont like him. They aren’t in your relationship they arnt the ones laying in bed with him. You are dont let other people’s opinions cloud your judgment or make your life choices for you.

If they don’t have a reason not to like him then they are the ones with a problem. As long as he treats you right and makes you happy then they should just accept it and be happy for you.

My in-laws don’t like me. We have 11 children and we are happily married. They CAN ROT​:100::100::100:

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Why don’t the sisters like him? If he’s the father of your child and if you’re going to get married or he’s going to be in your life then either you all go or no one goes, this is petty AF and disrespectful.

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Then I would not be going

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Then have the holidays at your house and don’t invite her

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I’d leave! If my family couldn’t accept my other half and he was so very good to me, who do you think I’m staying with?! Yeah, buddy! It’s my life, my heart, not their scroungy a$$e$!

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Nope. I have lost half of my “family” all bcuz i left my ex husband when i was not happy. They got mad when i didnt invite them to my wedding when theyve made it clear years ago they dont like him so why would we of invited them? I could care less. I have cut ties with all of them. I am better off anyways as theyre two-faced as hell. It was my choice to be with him as it is your choice. Who cares what they think. Theyre supposed to support you. If they dont, dont worry about them. I dont :woman_shrugging:

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Tell them if he’s not invited then you and y’alls baby isn’t either. Stop going around til your other siblings give a reason to why they don’t like him . as well til your parents stop babying your other siblings tell them if they don’t like him being at family events then they can stay away .

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Why dont they like him ?

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First you have to think about why they don’t like him. Is he a bad guy? Abusive physically or emotionally? Does he do drugs drink way too much? Is he into other bad things criminally or just not taking care of you and your child?

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I am the one that the siblings don’t like. It sucks. I’ve tried. I feel bad for my boyfriend stuck in the middle. It’s been over 7 years and they never gave me a chance. I was always greeted with sarcasm & attitude no matter what. From my position all I can say is be strong and don’t let it define or ruin things. As hard as it is. I hope they work it out, much like I hope we all do :crossed_fingers:t2:

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What are the reasons they don’t like him? Is it superficial stuff or do they see something you don’t?

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Bring him anyway. “I assume if you invite me, we are both invited”

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Why don’t they like him? Unless there’s a legit reason they can get over it. You’re an adult and you make/live with your own decisions. If he isn’t invited then tell them you aren’t coming. I mean really. Regardless of how they feel it’s their NIECE’s father and he should be included in family events too.

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there’s got to be a reason they don’t like him.

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Are your family members who dont like him feeding you? Financing you? [email protected] you? If the answer is no, then who cares what they think. You obviously are extremely happy with him. So screw them. They need to grow up. My grandparents hated my dad ( good reasons too ) but still were civilized for us kids sake.

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The entire post is about your family not liking him, yet you never say why.
Very one sided of you.

Why dont your sisters like him? Is their reason legit? I ask because your parents, brother and sil like him so wondering why all of them do but your sisters dont.

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I wouldnt go🤷🏼‍♀️ the person I love isn’t invited, I dont need to be there either.

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Theu can’t live your life. If you’re happy with him tell them you don’t have to come either if he isn’t invited.

What are their reasons? If he treats you and your child properly, loves you both and you love him. Their opinions shouldn’t matter. My husbands parents haven’t been exactly fond of me, there is a 10 year age gap between us. In fact it got so bad that we didn’t speak to them for more than a year. But recently due to a death in his family we were all brought together and things have changed some. We even had then over for dinner. They now see that their son is well taken care of that we love and respect each other and that maybe they were wrong to judge me. Maybe you should sit down. And have an honest and open conversation ask them why and correct them. Let them know you are serious with him and that you see yourself having a future with him. And go from there. Sometimes negative opinions are formed on incorrect assumptions. Also if you are serious about him and love him that much do not go on family outings without him. Take a stand. You share a child you are a family with him. If he isn’t welcome you aren’t either. Tell them that. If they really love and respect you they will accommodate if not then don’t go. It will show your solidarity to them and to him that you are willing to stand committed in your relationship.

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If he’s not abusive, treats you good and your child…who cares what family thinks!! Sometimes personalities crash!

I’m guessing he did messed up crap and you vented and cried to them and then forgave him while they’re still holding a grudge and still think of him in a bad way or he’ll hurt you again. I’ve seen that soon much, but my guess is that they have legit reasons. But my advice is to get them all together and have a sit down and get everything out in the open and see if you can find a conclusion and move on from it to at least tolerate him.

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Tell them to grow the fuck up. If my husband wasn’t allowed somewhere, I wouldn’t go

I wonder why? Have u asked them?

If they give u b.s then tell them hes always coming over when ur there. Theres no if ands or buts.

Now if ur family has warned you about how he treats you…maybe your blinded. Is he really mentally abusive…you just dont care to see it? Is he treating u well especially infront of ur family.

Also could be there jelly

Who gives two fucks what the siblings think,its not their life tell them to stfu and mine they business

The fact that you didn’t state the reason they don’t like him leads me, personally, to believe that you know they have reason. Maybe I’m wrong🤷‍♀️ I feel your relationship is your business and it’s not for everyone but I also know I have a problem with my sister’s relationship because her dude is a pos, abusive, to her and the kids, mooches off of her and honestly more reasons beyond that than I care to go into. It depends on the situation but what it really comes down to is it’s your decision ultimately. If someone is truly mistreating you though and your loved ones are just trying to get you to see your worth, is that really something to be that mad over🤔 If you’re allowing yourself to be mistreated or abused especially to the extent your not even seeing it, or not wanting to whatever really, but maybe get yourself into therapy and you can learn to love and respect yourself but also learn to draw healthy boundaries with your family in the future💯

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They don’t have to like him
YOU are the one in a relationship with him
If he isn’t invited don’t go
Start your own family traditions

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You do you! Who give a fuck what anyone else thinks!!

Need to know why they don’t like him … Is there an actual reason? Not that It’s their business regardless but if they’re looking out for your welfare that may be different

My ex was someone no one liked. I was completely head over heels in love with him. Even with the controlling abusive side he had

Sooo idk what the beef is, but if he wasn’t invited guess who else wouldn’t be going me and my mini, unless there is a legit reason it sounds childish as hell

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It depends on why they don’t like him. If it’s silly reason then I wouldn’t go to things if they don’t invite him.

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They are just looking out for you

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Why don’t they like him? If the reason isn’t valid I would stand by my man &not go to family functions either :woman_shrugging:t4:

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They will grow to luv him

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Start your own traditions at your house and invite those who support your relationship :woman_shrugging:

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Whats he done ?cause you like him don’t make him a decent person does he work? Does he pay bills? Do yall got your on car and place to live does he mooch off folks?

If they dont have an actual reason for disliking him (toxic behavior, abuse, etc) then thats on them. Ive never had a problem telling family that they need to respect my spouse and include him, or i wont attend.

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Unless you give reasons as to why your family doesn’t like him… no one can give a fair answer here.
Some reasons may be completely justified. I’m very protective of my sister. And if he were using drugs or is verbally or physically abusing her. Or lives off of her instead of contributing. I wouldn’t want him around family events either.

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So what’s the reason got to be a reason you didn’t state it

Live your life tell your sisters go live theirs!

Your the one with him not your sisters… and if he’s not invited to family gathering then you should not go.

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If there isn’t a good reason then tell them if he not invited you and baby can’t come

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We don’t go… if we ain’t all invited… no one goes. This isn’t my siblings/his siblings life… it’s ours. And if they don’t like him/me then fuck them… I’m not here to please everyone under the sun, I’m here to be the best mom, wife, worker… for my family, and that’s it. My advice is, no one lives my life, and my happiness is mine alone, and if I’m happy everyone else can kiss my ass.

My entire family hates my SO but hes my kids father and theyll bite their tongues for a few hours if it means they get to see the little ones.

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If u want to marry him worry about that, as long as you 2 are happy that’s all that matters…its your relationship not anyone else’s… as far as family outings and such if the father of my children wasnt invited I wouldn’t b going either :woman_shrugging:

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At the end of the day it’s about you if you are happy & u adore this guy & he means everything to u it don’t matter what other people think. It is your life not your sisters. If my partner wasn’t invited to a family gathering I wouldn’t go & either would my kids.

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How old are you? Do your own thing be around positive people.

So if they have no reason to dislike him then you don’t go either. Do christmas at home with your family. Eventually your family will get the point and it they want to get to know their grandchild then they’ll stop.

If MY MAN wasn’t invited THEN IM NOT GOING! What God brings together let NO MAN separate!!!

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If he hasn’t done anything to you that would cause your family to be pissed off about then start your own traditions but if he did do something to you and your family hasn’t forgiven him, even if you have, then maybe you all need a sit down and talk it out (this is why you don’t involve your family if you’re having relationship issues).

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I had a daughter who’s boyfriend I literally hated. But I had to turn the other cheek for years because I would have lost my daughter. I just wouldn’t talk to him when he was around. Nothing is more important then my child. Finally after a couple of years they broke up. My daughter is the most important thing to me in the world. I learned the more you talk negatively about them the better he looked to her so I just kept quite and Naturetakes it course

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I’d tell em tuff luck and be with who I want. If they anit fucking,feeding, financing you then they dont matter. You have you’re own family now.

Love me love my bf, if he ain’t invited don’t go

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I agree you don’t say why they don’t like him, you need to know the reason why before you can actually agree to why they feel this way?

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My mom’s family doesn’t like my fiance…but if he’s not invited I won’t go. I really don’t get invited to their family functions anyways because I’m not a drinker or smoker so I was told I don’t deserve my last name…but it’s not the point. Stand your ground, they invite him as well or you just stay home and celebrate with him and your son. If you ever marry this man…dont invite them!(unless they turn around and start getting along with your s/o) they will probably try to sabotage the special day.

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If an invite is extended to you then it is also extended to him. PERIOD.

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So your feelings are less important than your sister? I would be really upset with my mom and dad. I would stop worrying about them honestly because they obviously aren’t worried about you.

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My family absolutely hates my husband and has since they first met him four years ago. I cut ties with my entire family all together because they literally started drama and spread lies about him and stopped inviting him to family outings and holidays. He’s been nothing but kind to them and bent over backwards for them. If it’s that big of an issue then I’d stop going to family outings and tell them if he can’t come then you aren’t going.

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Why does an invitation need to be extended to him? If I’m invited anywhere, my husband is too. I don’t ask to check, we are a packaged deal, don’t like one of us? Don’t invite either of us, we’d rather stay home anyway :woman_shrugging:t2:

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If my husband isn’t invited or welcome, then my kids and I won’t be there either. I didn’t choose my family, but I did choose him. At the end of the day, he is the one who I’m spending my life with, so if someone doesn’t wanna see him, then they don’t get to see me :woman_shrugging:

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If he isn’t invited then I wouldn’t go either if I was you

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If hes that important to you and hes not invited then dont go, stay home do your own thing together as a family, sometimes that’s better anyway

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Either just stay home with them and if they’re fine not having you also, then that speaks having you. Or just bring him and make it clear the an invitation for you includes him. :woman_shrugging:t2::woman_shrugging:t2::woman_shrugging:t2:

What r the reasons?
Is he hitting on them?
Tried to touch them inappropriately. Does he insult u or flirt with other women? Did he cheat on u? Is he beating u? Does he not work and mooch off of u? Or maybe if it’s something like ur sister jealous of u. Sorry to ask but…if its something like that of course they wont ever like him. Jealousy is immature tho, ur parents r wrong for supporting that cause.

Either way…they r acting immature by not inviting him.
And then since you still attended family functions then u didnt support ur bf nor the cause of respecting ur relationship.

He feels out of place.
Hes your man and u need to put standards up to your family.
Ur sisters should have been shut down.

Not invited to chriatmas??! wow!

He must really love u to put up with that crap.

I didnt like neither of my sister bf…they were all the above. Douch bags…but I attended birthdays and Christmas functions becuz its 2 hrs of my life. Its important to my mom. It’s at her house not mine.

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If they have no reason to dislike him then they need to suck it up & be respectful of your relationship & be happy for you. If my man was excluded from all holidays ect me & our boys wouldn’t be attending.

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Okay well if can’t go I don’t go. Like him or not u gotta respect him and once he treats me right nobody disrespects him. Going to their functions will only make them think it’s okay to treat him like that. U gotta stand up for him

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Just odd your parents like em alot but they will abide your sister’s wishes for him not to attend. As a parent I woulda put her over my knee for a good wacking…its pure childish, that is if were reading the whole story here.

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That’s messed up if he’s never done anything wrong to them…plus if my s.o wasnt invited for that petty reason then dont expect me to show up either.

Plain and simple he’s your choice not theirs,if they don’t like him so be it. Just invite your parent’s and brother and sil to your home invite them also they refuse so be it. Go to holidays to your parent’s if they don’t invite you (sister’s) so be it. Their loss,your life is your’s and if they can’t except it not your fault.

Don’t go yourself if he isn’t invited. He is now part of your family, they need to suck it up and get over themselves. This is not your problem, it is theirs.

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What is their reasons for not liking him?

Stop going to things if he isn’t invited. If you truly love him then you need to stand by his side or they’ll never accept him and it’ll cause more problems down the road.

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Idgaf who likes or dislikes my man in my family. He is my partner, the father of my kids and my best friend. If they invite me, then the invite is for him and our kids too. If he isn’t welcome then neither am I because I wouldn’t be showing up at any gathering or party without my other half. If they can’t accept the person I love and cherish then they can forget seeing me and our kids at anything they have planned and we will do our own thing. At the end of the day, it’s you and him. It’s not you, him and your family members. They don’t need to respect him but they do need to know that if they disrespect him then they’re disrespecting me too. So either accept me and those who come with me or forget about us as a whole. It’s their problem, not yours. That’s what I think and how I feel. My advice, do your own thing and invite those who respect you and the father of your kid(s) and leave out the ones who can’t put their feelings aside enough to respect you and your man. As far as funerals go, like damn, if they can’t put aside their feelings for a funeral, they better get over it that day and bite their tongues because my mans coming with me, PERIOD.

But why don’t they like him?

Your siblings should be supportive of your partner… Is there a good reason why they don’t like him?..